I wake up with the worst hangover, except I haven't drank since I had left college and I am now nearing my thirties. Something was definitely wrong here. I know it is cold, and I know I am naked. I'm lying down on a soft bed, probably the softest I've ever laid down on and I wonder if I'm dreaming.
But no dreams are this real. I try to open my eyes and I see nothing but a blur. I can see a light. It is bright and I see movement.
"Hel-hello," says a figure who comes up to me. I try to focus on it and I realize that it is a she, and she is looking right at my naked body. Alright, I'm very awake now. I am about to ask her where the hell I am but she starts to talk first.
"You must be confused. Can you hear me? Nod if you can."
I nod.
"Good, that's great. Are you feeling any pain?"
I nod again and move my hand to my head to indicate that.
"I see. That's normal...it should go away in a while."
"Where am I?"
"There's no easy way to say this but...you're not on Earth anymore."
"I'm not what?"
I wonder again if I'm dreaming or if this some kind of joke. But the bigger question then becomes who would do this to me. Let me explain. I don't have many friends.
After leaving college with a degree that would require me a long, long time to pay back, I searched for a job that would help me to shorten that time.
And so I ended up in database management, which was me sitting in front of a computer half of the day as part of a bare-bones IT department where nobody bothered about us unless something went wrong.
I was not a social person to begin with and my job certainly didn't help. At the end of the day, I just went back home and sat in front of my screen again. It was either Netflix or gaming. I enjoyed the routine of course and I made decent money doing so.
Of course, everything is not going to be the same now.
My vision starts to return and I can see her now. She is tall, really tall. Probably my height. Her skin is bronzed and her hair is ridiculously long, reaching past her waist.
All unusual but what really took my breath away was the skin tight translucent bodysuit that she wore. It was like plastic wrap on her entire body and it left nothing to the imagination.
"You're not on Earth," she continues, "you're on another planet, in a different universe."
"Um...okay."
I am clearly not processing it.
"I should tell you why you're here," she says.
"Yeah...I uh...I guess."
She takes a deep breath and looks at me for awhile. I try to avoid her gaze, though it is hard not to take a look at her body. I can feel myself getting hard. Shit.
"Our planet consists almost entirely of what you call...women. Females. We have almost no men."
"No men?"
"Yes. Which is why we brought you here. We need your help."
"Help with what?"
But I realize I already know the answer.
"To reproduce."
Now I know this is a joke. This whole plot could only be dreamt up by some lazy scriptwriter for a shitty reality TV show.
"Who are you? I didn't give you permission to bring me here," I say trying to assert myself.
"No, you didn't. And for that, we must apologize. But we truly need your help."
"Look, I want out of here. And I need clothes."
"Of course, you are free to go after your medical examination and briefing. We will provide you garments to wear in a moment."
"Okay. Jesus. Why me?"
"Our Surveyer indicated your phenotype to be the most suitable for our needs. You were then selected for quantum transference to our universe."
"Right."
"I...I can see that you don't quite believe me. I am truly, really, telling you the truth. And when you realize that, it will be very hard for you. I am truly sorry for what we have done."
The almost sorrowful tone in her voice makes me look at her. I look into the silver eyes. Either she is a really great actress...or she is telling the truth.
"I am Acerva, and I have been assigned to be your Intermediary. I will help you acquaint yourself to our world. May I know your name?"
"My name? It's uh...Ryan."