The End Of The World As We Know It
"Any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from magic. "...Clarke's third law
This was an odd place to find epiphany.
I was balls deep in the luscious, freshly waxed and oiled quim of a college girl a third my age, watching the tenth orgasmic flush in as many minutes wash across her chest. As her cries became progressively more hoarse and less human, I'd glanced around at her sorority sisters, waiting their turns. Several were recovering from their full Brazilians, and nursing drinks (rug burn is an occupational hazard in my line of work, so we keep two expert wax techs on staff, for anyone who'd rather get waxed than have their pubes trimmed short).
The watching girls were looking flushed, glazed, or determined, depending on their personality, how much they'd seen of their sisters experiences, and how big a dose they'd inhaled of the pheromone vapor my assistant was pumping out of her laptop. I'd been toying with the idea of adding another 20% girth to the dick already stretching my current partner beyond anything she'd previously experienced, or deploying my second dick, wondering if she was cum drunk enough to not be thrown off when the thumb in her ass was replaced with something larger. The slick precum exuded by my modified prostate, oozing from the slit where my second dick would extrude, and loaded with muscle relaxants and nerve stimulants, had her ass open, loosened and ready...I'd been working the slime into her ass with my thumb for several minutes, now.
That's when it struck me. What I'd been doing for the last few years.... fucking scores of women each week, bringing them each to dozens of soul shattering orgasms before they passed out, all for the benefit of my alien employers...had I ended civilization? (or at least, the consumerist, corporate, capitalist, version of it that we're used to) Not an entirely bad thing, maybe, and I'd had help. Plus, I was duped. There was graft, deception, and conspiracy at the highest levels of government involved... and an intergalactic drug cartel contributing to the mess as well. Still, I have to admit to some responsibility.
Confused? I should back up.....
I've heard voices all my life.
Not all the time, mind you, I'm not nuts. It's only in that twilight zone at the edge of sleep, or when deep in a meditative state, that I hear them in disjointed, often unintelligible phrases. Like those snatches of conversations I used to hear, while sweeping the shortwave bands on an old radio as a kid, late in the night, phrases floating out of the background whispers of the stars.
But this was different.
I'd been musing on my misspent youth, lamenting lost opportunities, and more than that, my body's growing inability to take full advantage of the few offers I still get. The wrong side of sixty sucks goat balls for a Lothario of my caliber, habits, and needs.
"We can fix that, you know.....make you the stud your were, only more so. With the experience you have, and our enhancements, you'll clean up...all in exchange for just a little of your time."
Clear as a bell, both audio and video, high definition 3D on the inside of my eyelids. This was new. I had an elf ( platinum blond hair, iceberg blue eyes, marble pale skin, razor cheekbones, pointy ears...you know, elf a la Ring) in my head.
Great. I've got my subconscious sending me herbal Viagra ads.
"Even your mind isn't that twisted, bud. Here's the deal. We've been trying to study the human female orgasm, but the snatch and probe technique hasn't been working out so well. On top of that, the ethics committee recently decided that approach has become unacceptable, so now we have to use "informed volunteers". I talked them into accepting an informed local as a mediator instead, so long as no coercion was involved...that would be you."
"Now wait...what's so special about human orgasms?"
"Humans, and evidently some other animals on your planet, are the only species with females that have them, anywhere in the known galaxy. Males of most species do, of course, but not females....in fact, for many species, the females are barely sentient.
"Some women would claim the opposite was true here."
"But you are clearly at least...oh...that's what you humans call a "joke". Your females have orgasms in multiples, at a level of ecstasy that we can only imagine, we want to know why."
"OK, I'll bite. What do I get, exactly, and what's the catch?"
"You get your your hormone profile reset to that of an 18 year old...a very horny one. That, plus a few other tweaks we'll make to your biochemistry, will reverse most of your aging. You'll get all your hair back, most of the gray in your hair and beard will be gone in a few months, all of it in a year, no more morning aches and pains, you'll slim down without effort, your skin will tighten up, and you'll build muscle with ease.. We don't want to make you look eighteen, you'll probably end up passing for a very fit twenty five. You get your choice of added physical enhancements, anything that you think will make it easier enroll volunteers, or to trigger orgasms in quantity. You'll be equipped with a biologic telepathic transceiver and booster, so the subjects sensory experience can be sent in real time to our research station for analysis, and you'll be able to experience some of what she feels, to improve your yield."
"Those "physical enhancements "... How long 'till I recover from surgery?"
"SURGERY?!! We aren't barbarians, man! As the best bio-engineers in the galaxy, we have a rep to maintain, even on backwater, low tech planets like yours. Our tech people will implant organ seeds...kernels of tissue grown from your re-engineered cells, which will develop in situ over a few weeks, and go active after we download the necessary software to your cortex. We'll include an interface you'll use to set parameters and control the additions and your normal endowments, as well as to tap into her nervous system once you've plugged in. We were thinking a semi transparent display in your upper visual field, point and click menus controlled by your tongue on your soft palette"
"Sounds good....the catch?"
"Well...you'll have quota. A minimum of fifteen orgasms per volunteer, thirty would be better...we need a good statistical sample. You'll also be required to recruit at least thirty new volunteers per month."
"You've gotta be shit'n me...at my best I barely managed half that. That sort of action would kill me, even if I could pick up that many chicks in a month! "
"Trust me. When we get done with you, you'll be able to walk into any room, anywhere, and walk out in fifteen minutes with whoever you want., even two or three. You'll be able to read any woman like a book, tweak your body chemistry so you smell to her like the most fuckable man on the planet, recognize and decode all her signals and respond perfectly...you'll be the next best thing to a mind reader. You'll have conscious control of your erection and orgasms, including whether or not to ejaculate. All your body fluids will contain both potent aphrodisiacs and a combination of anti attachment hormones and hypnotics to blur her short term memory and prevent her fixating...you probably don't want hundreds of obsessed women stalking you. Since you'll need direct tissue to tissue contact to get a clean signal and orgasm pickup, condoms are out of the question, so we'll make you immune to all infectious diseases... viral, fungal and bacterial. Oh, and the study is planned to last ten of your years, we may extend to twenty if the results are good."
"Twenty fuckin' years? How the hell am I going to support myself while I'm fucking all day and night?"
"We'll take care of that. We planned to set up a trust account with a weekly payout. How does ten grand a week sound? American dollars, net. We'll handle the taxes. Plus the same amount into a 401K."
