Fox on the Run
After a long while of contemplation, staring out of the window and at my naked reflection in the glass pane, I put on my bodice and my short skirt, my heeled boots and turn toward the door. My eyes wander over to the table with the washing basin and the jug of water -- I maybe should clean myself but I kinda love the way I feel dirty -- a good kind of dirty, totally new to me. I can still smell my two partners of the night on me, mixed with my own body odours. I'll clean myself, of course, but - maybe not before I get home...
I look into the mirror above the toiletries - the existence of it is a luxury that doesn't seem to befit this little Inn -- this may be the best room available in the village, but still... I only have a four inch disk of polished metal to look at myself at home. I stare at my reflection -- I don't get to see it often, this image of myself is weird whenever I see myself thusly, but somehow - it looks even weirder this time.
My hair dark red with a golden hue in light like this is a curly mess. I had braided it for work as usual, but the braids fully dissolved last night and it now falls in waves down my shoulders. My green eyes shine brightly, like my hair a gift from my mother. People keep telling me I look more and more like her every day and I feel a pang of pain that my father never got to see me as an adult. Neither will mother see me grow in into a full woman. Which... kinda is why this reflection looks off, isn't it? More womanly? Adult? Or am I just imaging it due to - last night? My breasts are still as small as they were yesterday, slightly enhanced and pushed up by the bodice, my curves slender, only recently did the men stop calling me out for looking like a boy -- a little my forms seem to match their idea of a women more now that I am 18. It can't be my looks why I feel like a woman now...
With a shrug, I interrupt my silly musings, grab my new pouch - the jingling in it makes my mouth go dry - and tie it to my belt. Then change my mind and take it into my hand. I have never owned anything like it, I'll not let go of it.
I take a look at the bed -- should be my job to make it, but I still feel like a guest, not an employee, so I leave it as it is, get out the door and try to be as quite as possible coming down the stairs. I think everyone - the innkeeper included - should still be asleep. I'm in no mood to meet anyone I know.
As I walk home, slower than I usually do, I really need time to clear my mind, my future begins to form inside my head. A plan -- daring, brave, stupid, some -- many - of my fellow villagers might call it. But I will not miss this chance. I will no stay in this Gods forsaken place forever. What was a dim possibility behind the horizon just luring me, now seems more and more inevitable. Lately, this village, that was small and restrictive is beginning to feel like a trap. And if I don't seize this chance to leave it, I might fall back into it and never do.
When I reach my little house, in which I have been living alone for the last two years, I look at it, lost in thought. Would I miss it if I never see it again? I miss my mother every day, but she is no longer in there. Only the memories of her. As are the ones of my father, dimmer, fuzzier, so far gone. DO I need this? Or do I need...
From the stable of the house next door -- yes, they have an actual stable, it's much bigger house than my little one - I hear neighing. Like in response to wondering what I actually need right now. I nod. It is. Instead of opening my gate I take a step to the left one an open this one.
I knock on the door - it is open, of course, no one here locks their door, but I can't just walk inside. The door opens and my neighbour steps out - 40 something, thinning hair, carrying an impressive belly in front of him.
"What is it, what do you want?"
He squints, then his expression changes.
"Oh. It's you. Sorry, I didn't recognise ... you look..."
He squints again, unable to put into words, apparently, why he didn't recognise the girl he knows since I was born.
"Must be my hair, I'm not usually wearing it open."
He nods, with a frown.
"Hm, yeah. Gotta be. What can I do for you, lass?"
I see his eyes wander down my body, still in my work uniform. He has visited the Inn a lot lately, intensely staring at me. Here, somehow I don't really mind any more. His gaze on me feels... flattering. And it makes me feel surprisingly strong. I have something he deeply wants but it's mine to decide to give it to him. (Which I won't.)
"I..."
I struggle with finding words too, definitely The Plan in my had had been a little vague until now.
"I need your horse."
"Oh, do you. Planning a trip? Or a day in the woods? How long yo you want to borrow it then, dear?"
Nothing unusual. His family is one of the few owing their own horse who don't need it for field work. As good neighbour they let me borrow it often. And my Mon when she was still... As a matter of fact I pretty much learned to ride exclusively on this horse and her predecessor in this stable. But...
"I don't need to borrow it, I want to buy it."
His eyes open wide.
"BUY? Why in the netherworld you want to buy my horse? Not that it matters much, I seriously doubt you have enough money..."
I do, of course, now - enough money to by every single horse in this village. But I decided not to flaunt my new fortune and spend any of it back home. I do have something else. Something I don't need any more. Ever. Do I?
I turn my head to look at my little house.
"I need it to leave this place. And as I do -- you can have that."
I nod towards it.
"Have what?"