Vondila – African; Lost a Child
Part 7
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“When will they be back?”
The timid, quiet voice echoed softly in the cave, as Isabel paced back and forth. She nearly ignored the small voice at first, discounting it as some wishful, childlike voice in her own head speaking the numerous questions in her mind, ‘When will they be back’ being the prevalent one.
It had been several long minutes since Nic, William, and Alec had left the cave to ensure that the base was deserted and safe. They planned on finding a ship and preparing it for takeoff, hoping that any ship large enough was in good enough condition for Alec to repair. If they were lucky, they would be leaving before dark. None in the cave expected them back anytime soon, but that knowledge did little to lessen Isabel’s nerves or, as it seemed, Mabyn’s fear.
Isabel turned to the child, immediately wishing that her mother were here. Deva always knew exactly what to do or say to calm a child. While Isabel had never been maternal, she was devastated in knowing that for once, in this instant, she would give what little she had left to ease the fear and uncertainty shimmering in Mabyn’s eyes.
They had an unspoken kinship, as all the survivors did, each of them having lost so much: family, security, love, comfort. So much lost so soon. At least for Isabel, she had been able to live for years in the safety of the palace among those she loved. She had been able to give and receive her love freely, admiring her parents, quarrelling with Koen, crying on Will’s shoulder. All of it, the good and the bad, was memories that would sustain Isabel for a lifetime.
But the shy little girl standing in front of her now had no such hope. It was all Isabel could do to not bring her into a tight embrace and never let go.
Since Nic had left with the others, Mabyn had been alone, even though the cave still held several people. Looking at the other occupants of the cave, she felt excluded, an outsider among royalty. They looked at her with uncertainty, even though she was sure they thought they masked it well. It was as if they wanted to include her, but held her at arms length because of … she wasn’t quite sure.
She missed Dominic. In the few hours since he had rescued her, she had grown unusually close to him. His engaging smile and soft voice called to her, begged her to seek refuge in his arms. She had never had a father, had never known the kind of comfort that one could bring. Maybe Dominic wanted to be hers. Mabyn knew she wanted him to be, but she wouldn’t push. She lost the things she loved when she did that.
Mabyn had been leery of even bothering to ask. Grown ups always seemed to never really answer questions, shrugging off their validity because it was voiced by a ten year old. But Mabyn wanted to know so badly, and Isabel had seemed nice. She had watched the older woman pace by the entrance near the other guards that stood watch waiting for them to return. The others all sat and spoke with Koen, but Isabel waited – quite impatiently – just like Mabyn.
Her big brown eyes were expectant, and Isabel had to shake her head to clear the emotional fog to answer the girl’s question. “Um … soon. They’ll be back soon.”
Mabyn nodded; obviously disappointed at the answer Isabel had given her. Grown-ups always gave answers like that, elusive and vague. 'Soon' didn’t answer her question at all. She wanted to continue her questioning, but kept quiet. She didn’t ask 'How soon?' or 'But why?' even though she desperately wanted to. They were on the tip of her tongue, but she kept her mouth shut. She didn’t want to get in trouble. And the woman standing so tall in front of her, with her blonde hair and piercing eyes, scared her just a little bit.
Isabel continued to look at the girl standing next to her. She was always so quiet, and almost afraid. It was as if she had so many questions and ideas and theories and arguments, that she didn’t have the breath to voice them all, so instead she stayed silent. It was as if she didn’t want to get in trouble for soliciting them. It was sadly pathetic how she craved acceptance, but kept it at arms length all at the same time.
She had seen the closeness of her and Nic before the men had left earlier, and marveled at the ease at which they spoke.
“Why do you have to go?”
“Don’t worry, I’ll be back. I’m not leaving you Mabyn.” He brought his hand up to sweep a lock of hair out of her eyes, and tweaked her nose good-naturedly.
But her fear was hardly assuaged. She clung to him tightly, her tiny fists gripping the cloak he wore, her head buried in his neck. He brought his arms up to embrace her in her impromptu hug.
So far they had not been so deliberate or affectionate in embraces, being careful to keep an imaginary arms length. While they were by no means cavalier, he had been wary of getting too close. He was, after all, a soldier, and forming irrational bonds with young girls was something that his warrior mind should not be burdened with. He already had enough on his shoulders, not to mention the fact that Will was impatiently tapping his foot on the rock floor of the cave.
“Mabyn, don’t worry. I’m going to be fine.”
She sniffled as she pulled away slightly, his hands continuing their soothing pattern on her back. Neither of them was aware of how close or in tune to the other they were. He knew she needed to be reassured, and she knew that he needed to know someone was waiting for him. For the two of them, it went both ways - even though neither spoke of it, or even realized it.
“You promise?”
He nodded.
“But … but maybe I can go with you?” Her eyes were hopefully, and his heart broke a little knowing he would have to say no.
“I’m sorry, but … you can’t come with me. This … is for soldiers only. No beautiful little girls allowed.”
“I’ll be good,” she supplied quickly hoping to sway him. She bit her lip in anticipation, but she already knew he would say no.
He sighed.
“I know you will be, but you’ll have to be good for me here, okay?” When he saw her crestfallen face, he said, “I’ll be back soon, and then I’ll tell you another story, okay?”
“Promise?”
He smiled softly at her eagerness. “Yes, I promise.”
Even though Isabel had been seated on the other side of the cave with Koen, she had heard the exchange and was, needless to say, astonished. Who knew ‘The-Once-Sweet-Talking-Ladies-Man-Now-Famous-Not-
To-Mention-Decorated-Soldier’ Dominic could tenderly let a child like Mabyn down and still come off as the good natured, loving, gentle person that he appeared to be. Amazing, she had thought.
So much had changed in the years since she had last seen Nic. He was certainly not the same egotistical young boy he used to be. But then again, she was not the same snobbish bitch she used to be either.
War and death will do that to you
, she surmised.
Isabel crouched in front of the child, hoping that her usual intimidating stature would lessen if the two were face to face. Mabyn’s guarded demeanor reduced considerably with the gesture, and Isabel sighed internally. Perhaps more of the maternal instinct had been passed on than she had thought. The girl in front of her needed comfort or just some amicable company to pass the time; they both did. Isabel could only hope that she was up to the task.
