I
I awakened slowly, dreams of indeterminate nature crowded in my groggy mind. The press of naked flesh against me lingering from a dream, the hard pain in my mind real, wandering endlessly in a dark place dream, towers of dreams vaulted into the clouded heavens, broken bits of something, a fallen something, an imprecise nameless and imperceptible something lingering just beyond my grasp, reaching for it, reaching, a thick glove grasping at a needle, sharp but shapeless, gone in the numbness of my fingers, the cold pressing in. The warmth of body next to mine.
Not a dream. The body was not a dream. I could feel the flesh, naked against mine naked. Man or woman? Soft as a woman, breasts, not huge but neither small, touching against me shoulder. I faced her. I stirred more to pull away, I had no wakeful memory of woman, I could not pull away, a wall behind me, a cold wall. Laying on something soft, no cover, my back cold but she was warm. It was dark. Not the kind of dark where your eyes would eventually make out blobs of shape and angle, but true dark where nothing but the spiral bright light hallucinations.
The voice startled me and I jostled the woman, body falling away from me, still touching but should to shoulder pressed, squeezed between warm body and cold wall.
"You are awake now." A strange male voice. I had no elucidate response. "Uh," perhaps, or "gug."
Information will be revealed as the voice chose to reveal it. I could not talk back, there was no microphone it was talking to the cold box walls. She would not wake she was drugged, weighed deep into billowing numb soft. I could do what I liked with her, she would not wake nor remember. The silence was new when the voice was done. It had been before but I had not noticed it. It was the silence of a low, steady and incessant hum.
Do what I liked. Nothing as it was. A sleeping girl. Was I tempted? Not, I think, though her naked body there, shoulder pressed to shoulder, hip just touching hip. Her naked body, breathing there, the softness of her breasts, no, the softness of her flesh, but no. I could not reconcile myself to a man who would fondle a sleeping helpless girl. Not I. Would she wake and be afraid? Best to give no reason, to look eye to eye and say no, I did not, I could not, you are lovely but it would not have been the right.
Thoughts crowded to me though the hard edge of my headache. A drunken night, no girl, as always, alone and drunk, shrinking into tortoise shell or hermit shell, a weathered withered thing, all alone, trashed abode, trashed home, trashed floors, junk everywhere, only not junk, the things of my life. Hulking containers, vase and shipwrecked bottle. All alone and drunk. All alone and work. All alone and drunk. All alone and work, all alone and drunk. More gyre than cycle, widening out, blasting out to oblivion.
But now? A dream still? Sleeping by this body, this strange cold box, I felt above me and had only a foot above me. The wall besides me. Had she room besides her? No way to check without, yes, no way to check now.
The voice again. "She is cold, you must keep her warm or she will suffer. A dim light, a small box indeed, no room above or below or besides. A blanket by her feet. Gray lifeless walls. Indeed she shivered. I was able to pull the blanket to my hand with my foot. My thigh brushing against her thigh, she was indeed cold and soft, she felt wonderful but I should not dwell on that. I pulled the blanket around her. Her lips blue and seemingly bluer as I watched. I turned her towards me to hold her, pulled her close as she flopped sleeping against me, breasts, soft breasts, against my chest, soft stomach against my soft stomach. My too large stomach. Skinny thing that I am, a too large stomach. Hers was soft, she seemed formed to me, breasts pressing forwards to my chest, my stomach pressing out to hers.
She was very cold. Blanket up I held her to me. She shivered then it subsided, she moved a little, unconsciously nuzzling into me. I held her. To hold a woman. It had been, the last had been, but leave it, it was good to hold a woman, sleeping though she was. Sleeping. I the perverted wretched thrall clinging her naked flesh to mine, enjoying the press of flesh, the softness of breast, the feel of her thighs against my cock. My hardening cock. Or I the life giver, the benevolent giver of warmth, prometheus, but no, he brought fire not human warmth. I shifted myself just so my cock would press against the padding beneath us rather than her. I grew harder until I felt the strength of the erection would pull my hips down of its own volition. Of its or their? Semantics.
Okay. Thought. Thinking. Where was I? What had happened? Why were we entwined thus in some small austere box? Who held us captive? Why? I felt no panic. Odd, perhaps. To wake a prisoner and feel no panic?
"It is a drug inside you, you are filled with a benzodiazepine to promote calmness and prevent panic and injury. The dosage will be adjusted down as you settle into your new situation. The woman besides you will begin to wake soon, if you keep her warm enough. If she dies she will be replaced, so you may reject her if you do not like her."