The Sixth Day
Sensing the presence, both awoke with a start. They were on their feet, swords in hand, in one fluid motion of naked bodies. When they observed it was only the Praetor, they dropped their guards. Giselle thought the look on his face was one of amusement.
“Well?” Giselle challenged, a note of irritation in her voice. “Did you get a good look?”
“Oh my,
yes
,” the Praetor replied. “The ratings went… how do you say it? ‘Through the roof’.”
“Well then,” Geoffrey added with undisguised irritation, “since you obviously didn’t get enough, perhaps we can offer you an
encore.
What do you say? Shall I just throw her up against the wall right here and have at it? Perhaps bent over the table outside? How about it – a little bumfuck
al fresco?
”
“Geoffrey
!”
“Wait a minute, Buster! If
anybody
gets to look at the goods, it’s gonna be me, not that sick fuck, Praetor. I swear to God, if he lays a hand on me again, I’m gonna rip him a new one!”
“SADIE!”
“Just a moment,” Geoffrey said directly to the Praetor’s image, his irritation rising. “Do you mean we put on a show that had your entire planet wanking like addled schoolboys, and you repay us by molesting a poor, defenseless
laptop computer
? What kind of perverts
are you?
”
“He’s the kind that wants to stick his hard drive in my floppy slot. Was it good for you, Sweetums? I wasn’t too
loose
for you, was I? I mean, I know how easy it is for those
tiny ones
to get lost inside a
real
slot.”
“Have you no shame, sir?” Geoff retorted angrily.
Both
his swords were at the ready then. You had your way with a member of my family while my wife and I were asleep
in the same room?
I’ll have you know these are
my
slots! Come down here and fight like a man!”
The Praetor’s image dissipated.
One could only wonder what the Arcturans made of two humans and an artificially-intelligent computer locked in the throes of a five-minute laughing jag. Sadie’s laughter had a rather harsh, tinny, raucous tone to it, by virtue of her small stereo speakers. Geoff clutched his sides tightly, forlornly attempting to squelch the pain. Giselle had big, fat tears rolling down both cheeks. Her whole body shuddered in mirth, causing her bustline to jiggle enticingly. It was inevitable Geoff and Giselle would clutch each other for support. And kiss. Passionately.
“All right you two. Either break it up or get a cave.”
“Got one,” Giselle cooed.
“Then get a
different
one! All this mush is upsetting to my innocent young eye.”
“You’re just jealous,” teased Geoff.
“Damn straight, Skippy! You would be, too.”
“Yes, I expect you are right about that,” mused Geoff. “Incidentally, that was a nice bit of work taking the Praetor down a notch. For what it is worth, I believe your ‘slot’ deserves far better.”
“You too, Joy Boy. That ‘old boy righteous indignation’ shtick had me in stitches. This is the first time I don’t mind a
man
calling me his ‘slot’. You’ve got big brass ones!”
“You don’t know how much it means to me,” Giselle interjected, wiping the tears from her eyes, “that you two are getting on so well. That was the best laugh I have had in… well, I really can’t remember when. Sadie, why are you up? I know I didn’t leave you on last night.”
“Wake On LAN, G. Praetor goosed me for real. G., he went after your diary files again.”
“Did he get any of it?” Giselle inquired pensively.
"Yeah, Boss;
All of it
. I feel so…
violated.”
Geoff thought he noted a touch of sarcasm in Sadie’s lament.
“I’m sorry, Sadie,” Giselle replied. “You done good, anyway.”
“Thanks, Boss. I think I’m gonna do a defrag. That’ll make me feel cleaner.”
“Go ahead, Sweetie,” the Blonde responded, “and thanks again.”
Geoff held her tightly. Giselle looked up into his eyes, smiling teasingly.
“Your
wife
?” she taunted softly. “Did I miss the memo?”
“The Arcturans seem to think you are,” Geoff responded. “At any rate, it sounded good at the time.”
Giselle nodded vigorously.
“Uh-
huh!
”
“I’m so sorry the Arcturans violated your privacy like that,” he intoned.
She gently pressed her fingertips to his lips.
“Don’t be,” she admonished. “Actually, this is the
second
best moment of my life.”
“
Second
best?” Geoff inquired. “What was the
best
?”
She gazed at his lips, mere inches from her own.
“Dumb question,” she replied, as she brought her lips to his.
*****
They returned to the site of the near-fatal ambush from two days before. A more cautious reconnaissance revealed no immediate Golganthan presence. It didn’t take long to recover both swords, concealed beneath some ground-hugging ferns. Apparently, the Golganthans had either no interest in returning to the spot where Geoff had fallen, or had no idea the humans’ ‘arsenal’ lay literally at their feet.
Although no guarantee of ‘parity’ had ever been extended by the Arcturans, Geoff felt it was intrinsically unfair the Golganthans now had projectile weapons while he and Giselle had none. Giselle pointed out it was just as likely the Golganthans had fashioned their bows and arrows from materials found within these very woods – and the Arcturans would have likely rewarded them for their ingenuity.
“Shouldn’t we make our own then?”, Geoff inquired.
“We could, and they would certainly be useful,” Giselle replied, “but I intend to finish this today, now that I know we can.”
Geoff slung his sword across his back, then took her hands in his.
“You could have finished it
two days ago,
” he softly intoned. “I remember more of it, now that I am here. We…
you
had them beaten and on the run. You could have finished it right then. Earth would be safe now.”
“I wasn’t willing to pay the price,” she replied softly.
“You were the one who told
me
,” Geoff countered, “the mission comes first.
One
life is unimportant. It would have been a fair exchange for six billion lives back home.”
“No, it would
not
,” Giselle stormed. “
Your
life has become important to me. Particularly since I got you into this mess in the first place.”
“That is nonsense,” Geoff countered. “How could you? The Arcturans….”
“Read my diary,” interjected Giselle. “We already know what