Climbing a mountain with a boner is difficult. Unfortunately, Mount Madhollow is infamous for its horrible terrain. Being as high as it was with sheer, smooth walls that gave very little purchase and were too hard to drive a piton into, nobody sane ever climbed up here voluntarily. It was said that in the Eld Times, villages and towns would send their condemned to climb up -- a death sentence as sure as any guillotine or gallows. If the treacherous drops and the bitter night's cold didn't get you, it's said that vile monsters lurked in the caves. You know that one's true (even if 'vile' isn't quite how you would describe them), which isn't much comfort, but somebody's got to do it, and you'll be damned and drained dry if you'll beg the College for help so soon.
Therefore, armed with a hook, twenty feet of rope and a throbbing hard-on that doesn't look like it's going away any time soon, you fling the hook as hard as you can, and watch in disappointment as it bounces off. There's a small cleft in the otherwise impenetrable granite that looks like it could support some weight, and you take until midday to get a decent purchase on it. Finally, hoisting yourself up the rope, you cling on to the edge of the next ridge; arms aching as you swing your body onto safe ground, you yank the rope and hook out of the crevice, before collapsing spread-eagled onto the ground, gasping for breath.
Climbing up that rock face after fighting off the two succubae took a lot out of you; your limbs feel like they've been pounded with a hammer, and that erection still hasn't gone. Must be magically induced... you'd pleasure yourself to get rid of it, but those succubae are still relatively close by, and the old books in the College's library had said they could smell a man's lust from miles away. Hopefully it'll go down eventually. You don't want to meet them again.
After regaining your breath, the next thing to regain is your bearings. Trying not to look down, you swivel your head around, noticing that you're lying on a mountain path. What...? A path up Madhollow? You'd never heard of anything like this, but... come to think of it, this looks freshly carved. Not much dust, no wear on the route ... did those succubae make this? They seemed magically powerful, but to carve through granite like cheese like this... they couldn't have done this by themselves. What a comforting thought. Still, this path should make it easier than climbing all the way up...
You drag yourself back upright, and begin the process of marching up the slope. It's steep and difficult, but it still beats another climb. A couple of miles in, you notice a figure sitting on a rock at the side of the path. It's dressed in a green hooded robe which is pretty bulky, so you can't make anything out. "Hello?" you call out from a safe distance. The figure starts, before seeming to turn its head towards you.
"T-there's somebody there? Henny? Penny?" It's a girl's voice, tinted with a slight, unknown accent. Pretty high-pitched and cute, too.
"N-no, I'm here to stop the succubae."
The hooded girl pauses, apparently in thought. "Are you? I thought they were a peaceful lot."
"The men from the village have been disappearing... they sent me to get them back."
"Get them back...? Are you a Hero?"
"Freshly graduated," you state with a smirk.
"Oh, that's impressive. I don't hear much of Heroes from up here, but if you're here then they must be a bigger threat than I thought."
This stokes your ego a bit, so you puff your chest out and move closer. "To tell you the truth, I encountered two of them a few of hours ago. Nothing I couldn't handle."
"Really?" she asks, interested. "What happened to them?"
"They..." you begin to say, before visions of the incestuous lesbian sex flash before your eyes. "They've been defeated for now."
"That's good. Too often you hear about Heroes mindlessly killing monsters. I'm glad to see somebody remembers the old ways," she says, a smile in her voice. You decide not to mention that you probably would have done it if you could.
A short and awkward pause. "So," you say, resorting to small talk. "What are you doing up here?"
"Me? Oh, I'm just meditating. There's something about this mountain... it really calms the thoughts, allows you to think clearly. You're welcome to join me if you'd like?"
The offer does sound tempting... "I'm sorry, but I can't. I need to deal with the succubae, and I don't want to wait while more men end up disappearing."
"Ah. That's understandable. Do you mind if I go with you?"
"What!? Go with me? They're dangerous monsters, you might get hurt!"
"Don't worry about me, I can handle myself. The meditation was getting boring anyway!" With that, the girl jumps up and stands beside you. "Well? You want to deal with them, right?"
You sigh. She seems pretty pleasant... "Well, fine. Just don't blame me if something bad happens to you."
"Oh, don't worry. I'll be fine, worry about yourself!"
And so, the two of you set off, the winds of fate howling.
"...So what's with your clothes?"
"These old things? They keep me warm."
"It's surely not that cold, is it?"
"Heh... not to you, maybe. I'm originally from the southern wastes, so I need to keep wrapped up."
"Really? How did you end up here?"
"It's a... long story," she says, somewhat wistfully. "Maybe one day I'll go back, but the succubae come first, don't forget."
"Y-yes," you agree, flustered. "Do you have any weapons under there?"
She laughs. "That's hardly a proper question to put to a woman, Hero."
"I'm sorry," you quickly say.
"Isn't it how you say, 'a good lady never reveals her secrets'?"
"I-I thought that was magicians..."
"Hmm, really? I confess I haven't spoken to many of your kind since I came here..."
That made sense, what with living up a mountain and all.
