Part 1
Samuel Foster didn't like being taken by surprise. He'd always considered himself a cautious man, always trying to anticipate whatever new disaster might be waiting around the corner. It had served him well on his climb toward regional management. But even now, being thrown completely for a loop never failed to leave a bitter taste in his mouth. Especially the kind that involved a surprise package left on his desk over lunch. And even worse when its presence was foreshadowed by knowing snickers and sideways glances all the way back to his office. The fact that this particular surprise could only have come from his wife didn't make things any better.
It was the size of a large novel, boxed in the usual drab cardboard favored by delivery companies everywhere for its cheap inconspicuousness. This made the hot pink and gold address label all the more obnoxious, proudly declaring itself to the world as a "Premium Deluxe Special," sent from the Miracle Flesh Co. The silhouette of a nude woman reclined beneath the letters, an engorged cock pressed to her lips. Probably in case the rest of it was too subtle.
"Hey, Sam! Looks like someone's in for a good time tonight!" someone outside his office crowed.
"So unprofessional," he growled as he slammed the door and locked it. Had everyone been in his office while he was gone, or had that intern from the mail room been showing it off to everyone as he made his rounds? He turned the package over in his hands and found an envelope taped to the back, signed "To my loving husband," in garish gold gel ink that made his eyes water against the crisp white cardstock.
Remember how you said you wanted to be more adventurous in the sack? Well, I went and found the wildest thing I could think of. Hope you'll be thinking of me until you get home. I know I will. ;-) Your ever faithful (and willing) wife (read: cum dumpster) Ash
He set the note face down on the desk and buried his face in his hands. Relieved that no one from corporate was scheduled to come in today. And grinning like an idiot. Until he opened the box.
***
"So? How was work today? Anything interesting happen?"
Sam looked his wife over suspiciously as he shut the garage door behind him. As usual, Ashley had beaten him home from work and stripped down to a comfortable pair of jogging shorts and a loose t-shirt. Her expression was innocent enough, a playful fox's smile parting her cupid's bow lips as she reached up on her toes to kiss him. He hugged her and kissed the top of her head, breathing in the scent of strawberry and lavender. She had pulled her blonde hair into a ponytail, freshly washed, blow-dried and so deliciously warm against his cheek. The way she smelled after a shower always left him ready to throw her onto the bed and tear her clothes off. Instead, he tore himself away, holding her out at arm's length.
"Something wrong?" she asked. Her eyes were a brilliant blue and wide with expectation. "Did something unexpected happen?"
He arched a dark eyebrow at her, which only made that knowing grin more feral.
"Actually, I did."
"And? What did you think?"
"No idea," he answered brightly, taking the package from his briefcase and tossing it to her. "I didn't open it."
"Boo." Ash caught it without looking, driving the full force of her pout into him. "You're no fun."
"You really need to stop sending weird things to my office," Sam said, all humor gone from his demeanor. "I could get in a lot of trouble if the wrong people saw stuff like this. Where'd you find this thing anyway?"
"One of my girlfriends recommended it. She has a cousin who has gotten into making stuff like this. Now she's started a business and they've been showing stuff off to our friend groups trying to drum up customers."
"Which friend?" he asked, incredulous. "Not that weird chick who thinks she can do magic?"
"Moira's not that bad. She and her family are just a little, you know, quirky."
"That's just a nice way of saying weird."
"Besides," she steamrolled by as if she hadn't heard, "Everyone says their stuff is great! My sister, she finally talked me into it. She and her husband have been using Miracle Flesh stuff for a year now. Whole new experience! Says she's never cum so much before and George can't keep his hands off her. It's amazing! Are you feeling okay, hon?"
"Yeah. Just tired from work," Sam lied as he rubbed his temples.
"Well, you know what will help with that?" Ash slowly lifted the package in front of her face, tilting it back and forth so it appeared to be doing a little dance. "Come on! Admit it, you're curious."
"About a 'Nu Yu Custom Skin Suit?'" he said, trying and failing not to laugh. "Sounds like the sort of thing Hannibal Lecter would come up with."
"Buffalo Bill," she corrected. "Hannibal was only a cannibal."
"Whatever," he said, playfully rolling his eyes. "Besides, your friend's cousin can't even spell. How am I supposed to trust a sex toy that isn't even grammatically correct?"
"Come on," Ash whined, putting her hands together and unleashing the puppy dog eyes. "I promised I'd leave a review online. And may I remind you that it was your idea to try new stuff? Then kept turning down all of my ideas: fucking in a public place, edgeplay, incest play, the BDSM club..."
"Okay, okay, you've made your point." He sighed, putting a hand around her shoulder and holding her tight. "I'm just, you know, trying to ease into things. We have a good thing going. I don't want to ruin it by moving too fast."
"You mean get scared off because your wife's a freak?" she asked, grinning like a maniac.
"Something like that."
"Okay. I'll tell you what. Indulge me on this and you get to pick our next weird sex outing. Sound fair?"
"Hmm," Sam agreed lasciviously.
Ash rolled her eyes. "Let me guess. Threesome?"
Sam answered with an indifferent shrug.
"Fine," she laughed, slapping him playfully on the arm before offering her own. "But I get to pick."
"Agreed," he said. And in the same breath added, "so long as it's a woman," before grabbing her hand and shaking vigorously.
Ash stuck her tongue out. "Basic."
"I just know what I like," he said shamelessly. "So where are we trying out this freakish thing? In here, the bedroom, or what?"