Disclaimer: All persons engaged in sexual acts or otherwise sexualized in this story are 18 or older.
Okay, you caught me. Reports of my death are greatly exaggerated, etc. I bet it hooked you though, and I'm pretty sure an old English teacher of mine told me I needed one of those to start a story.
Luckily for this tale, and perhaps unluckily for me, my own life gave me a plot hook.
It would be a pretty sad story if it ended with me dying of a seizure on the linoleum floor of a diner at the ripe old age of 26. I didn't lie to you though. On that ill-fated Monday, amid the chaos of a rapidly collapsing social order, I did die. At least, Charles Finch died. What rose out of his ashes, however, is what this story is really about. Buckle up kids, from here on out, its about to get weird.
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Red. Everything was red. I was consumed by an ocean of swirling red eddies, pushing my grasping consciousness under tidal waves of crimson liquid. It forced itself down my throat, filled my lungs, bled from every orifice of my body as it simultaneously pushed back into me. All I could see was the red, and as its waves battered my fragile psyche, I could only feel crimson. Heat, pain, anger, violence. They swirled within me, overflowing what I could feel and challenging all I knew. I was lost in that fire that consumed my body and soul. To put it mildly, my bad day had returned.
And yet, as I drowned in my own mind and my body was ravaged by this unknown terror, I felt something else. I saw a pattern in the blood-red ocean around me. The deep crimson of agony and violence was mixing with something lighter, a pure vermillion that highlighted the crests of waves. In the foam of the frothing waters, I saw bubbles of pink and rose. For a moment I achieved clarity, a purpose amid my downing consciousness. I was being consumed, and I somehow knew that this ocean would truly kill me if I let it. It would turn me into something monstrous, as hateful and angry as the crimson abyss. In that realization I found a sliver of commitment.
Fuck that.
There was more to this crimson tide than hate and pain, and I opened up my mind, lowered the mental drawbridge into my soul that had been keeping the red from swallowing me whole. As I felt the water fill every part of me, I accepted all that it was. Red was renowned as the color of violence and bloodshed, of fire and pain, but also of passion. The heat of fire was also the heat of love, of creativity, instinct, and art. Blood poured from open wounds, but it also bound the living together. In accepting the darkness, I found the light, and suddenly the ocean calmed. It still raged around me, but I was suddenly buoyed by its currents, rather than pushed under. I held no control over the crimson sea, but it recognized me as its own, and let me navigate its currents at my leisure.
As my mind calmed, so did the fire that raged within my body. I knew that I remained separate, caught within this internal realm of the unconscious, but the link back to myself felt...secure, where it once raged with heat and pain. I traced its path, and it led down from my floating body into the abyss. Taken a deep breath, I plunged myself under the waves and pulled myself down its chain into the depths. I didn't know how deep it went, or if I would run out of metaphysical air in this liminal space, but I knew I had to wake up. The only path, at least at the moment, was down.
I pulled, clawed, and fought my way down the chain as the pressure increased in the bloody depths. I felt a terrible pounding in my skull, but I pressed further. One more link of the chain, I repeated over and over in my mind. Finally, I saw the sea floor ahead of me, and the anchor to the link. As I pulled myself closer, I made out a figure holding onto the chain. Even as I reached the anchor the details were indistinct, and I couldn't make out this mysterious figure within my mind. Only when my feet rested on the seabed did the figure turn and place one hand, red as the water around us, over mine. I looked into her eyes, black as the night with irises of brilliant ruby, and a predator's smile pulled up her lips. She pulled herself close to me, pressed her body up against mine, and kissed me. From between her lips, I felt life-giving air push into my lungs, and I felt my chest heave as I finally breathed.
I opened my eyes, and the crimson ocean was gone. In its place was a blinding white light, pointed directly into my eyes. It felt like all my senses were tingling with atrophy; I was numb to the world, insensate almost, but that light was just really fucking bright. Having just clawed myself from the edge of oblivion, I was annoyed enough by this floodlight in my face that I found the strength to turn my head from its light, and found myself locking eyes with a man clad head to toe in an operating gown, holding a scalpel inches from my face. Behind a surgical mask his eyes widened in what looked like fear, and he let out a remarkably high-pitched scream as the scalpel cluttered from his fingers. He scrambled out of my line of sight, and it occurred to me in my lethargy that, maybe, something odd was going on.