Thank you to everyone for continuing to read my story. Your kind words are a great inspiration to me!
A quick note about the previous chapter. I've rewritten chapter two, so if you've only read the original chapter I would suggest you go back and read the rewritten one. You'll know it's the rewritten chapter if there's a note like this at the top saying it is. I originally thought there was a much shorter trajectory to this story but after posting chapter two I found there's much more to explore.
I promise not to post rewrites to previous chapters very often and only when absolutely necessary. In this instance, I believe it was.
Thank you again for your inspiration and I hope you enjoy chapter three!
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"Big Brother is watching," is the first thing that comes to mind as I stare at the piece of paper I'm holding. I've just gotten back from my usual wanderings around the city. Having no actual responsibilities, I've been spending the last couple of days just walking around. Most of the time I'm people watching, studying the weird idiosyncratic nature of human beings. I've never just sat and watched people before. I've found it to be a very pleasing pass time.
Right as I walked in the door my mom handed me a letter from school. It turns out I'm going to Hunter College. Not bad, a city school. I don't know how good my grades were but judging from my family we probably can't afford NYU or Columbia tuition. The letter turns out to be my summer reading list.
"They had our address wrong in their system," my mom explains to me. "It's not fair that they send you a list of books to read
three weeks
before the semester starts. What kind of university is this?"
"It's not, it's a college." I correct her, though I don't really know why.
"It is part of the CUNY system, Ashley. Do you know what that stands for?"
"Yes, mom."
"City
University
of New York. Hunter is just one campus."
"I know."
"Don't sell yourself short, that's all I'm saying." She ends it with an overly big smile that I've seen all too often this week. Something that says "I'm just joking...but I'm also right." I guess I can't argue with her. She is.
The point I can't bring up to her is that I've already read these books. Years ago. In fact,
Nineteen Eighty-Four
is one of my favorite books. The other two are fairly basic as well.
A Catcher in the Rye
and
Beloved
. I'll have to read a plot synopsis of them just because, like I said, it's been years since I read them. Although from the looks of things I'm not nearly as worried as my mom.
"Looks like you're going to be shacked up reading for the next couple of weeks," she teases.
"I'll be fine. I can finish these in a couple days."
"I've never known you to be such an avid reader, Ashley."
"Well I don't have much else to do, now do I?"
My mom laughs at that. "No, I guess you don't."
I walk over to the couch and sit down next to my dad. He's watching one of those nightly news shows. The pundit seems to be upset about something, but then again they always are. I've never been one to care about politics all that much. I recognize the pundit but I have no idea what his name is.
"What did you do today," my dad asks me, keeping his eyes on the TV.
"Not much, just walked around."
"You saw the letter that came for you?"
I nod.
"You think you'll be okay?" He still doesn't look at me but I can tell he's now more focussed on me than the TV. These two really seem to be concerned about me being ready for college. When Ben started college his parents barely asked him two questions about it. Most of the conversations went "how's school," "fine," and that was that. Maybe because Jack didn't go to college they're even more concerned about me? I wish I could reassure them by saying I've already gone to college, so it's going to be a piece of cake.
I wonder if I'll ever be able to tell them the truth. Probably not. I hope I'm just as good of an Ashley to them as the previous one was. It seems like I have a good relationship with them, so I'd hate to be the one that ruins it.
"I'll be fine, dad." My reassurance puts a smile on his face. "If I can't read three books in a couple weeks, I shouldn't have gotten into college anyway."
He lets out a deep laugh at that one and pats me on the thigh. "That's my girl."
"How was work," I ask him. I need to start finding out more information about these two before I get caught in an awkward situation.
He shakes his head. "Our client is getting cold feet. We were supposed to sign a deal today but their representative canceled. No reason, no warning, just done. People, you know?"
I nod my head though I don't know what I'm agreeing to. That didn't give me much and I still have no idea what he does. "So what are you going to do?"
"Someone in the office suggested I have the guy over for dinner. Putting more of a personal face on our company might soften him up a little. You're free Monday night, right?"
"Yeah, as far as I know." Other than Brian's party tomorrow night, I have nothing going on. One of the perks of this new life I have.
"Good. Now if only I can get an answer from that idiot brother of yours." He sounds annoyed just at the mention of Jack. I wonder what the deal between them is.
"Where is Jack?"
"Who ever knows with that boy." He shakes his head in disappointment and then looks at me for the first time. "At least I've got you."
I smile. It's a weird feeling. I know he's giving me a compliment but accepting it feels like an insult to Jack. Although, for all I know Jack deserves it. I don't know the background here. "Thanks dad," is all I say.
My phone buzzes in my pocket. I take it out and see a text from Wendy.
"can i come over"
"sure" I type back.
"Who's that," my dad asks.
"Wendy. She's coming over."
My mom's ears perk up from the table. "Oh good. We haven't seen her in a while. I like that girl."
"Hey Ashley," my dad says next to me. "Want to make me a drink?"
Is this something normal in this family? Making my dad a drink? Why can't he make his own damn drink? I wonder if he ever asks Jack to do that or if this is something reserved for me because I'm a girl. I've been noticing a lot of little things like this ever since I became Ashley. I guess I'm his personal bar tender.
"What do you want," I ask through gritted teeth.
"The usual."
Great! What the hell is the usual? I get up and walk to the kitchen. I start to open the cabinets looking for alcohol. Where would these people keep their liquor? I get a glass from the cabinet. I do know where that is. It's just about the only thing I've gotten for myself from this kitchen. I look in the freezer and find a bottle of vodka. I open the fridge and see a bottle of seltzer water. If they have a lime that's what I'm doing. Sure enough, I find one. I pour some vodka and seltzer in a glass and put a slice of lime on the top.
I walk back into the living room and hold the drink out to my dad. He stares at it, a weird look on his face. "Do I look like your mom?"
What's that supposed to mean?
"That's what she drinks," he says through laughter.
"Vodka sodas are good." It's a feeble attempt at making this error seem normal.
"And how would you know?" His eyebrows raise in an accusation that looks half mocking and half serious.
My mom walks over and takes the glass from my outstretched hand. "I'll take it." She then looks at my dad. "I'll make your drink, honey." She gives me a half smile as she walks away.
My dad looks back to me. "Are you too old now to be making your old man a drink?"
Of course I am! I'm eighteen years old, man. What do you think? Of course I don't say that. I just stand there staring at him, my mouth hanging open.
The doorbell rings.
"I got it!" I quickly run to the door to get away from my dad. Standing in the doorway is Wendy.
"What's up, Ash?" She gives me a hug and walks into the apartment. My mom walks out of the kitchen as Wendy enters, a straight glass of whisky in her hand. (Now I know what the "usual" is).
"Hello Wendy," my mom says in an energetic high pitched voice. She continues to walk to my dad as she speaks. "It's been so long since we've seen you. How is everything?"
"Good, Mrs. Montgomery," she says politely. "How are you Mr. Montgomery?"
"Good, good. Are you excited for college to start?"
God, that's all this man talks about!
"Yeah! Very excited," Wendy says. "I can't wait."
Before we get into another college discussion, I chime in. "Okay, we'll see you later." I start walking to my bedroom and Wendy follows me. I close the door behind us.
"That's all he talks about," I say to Wendy as she takes a seat on my bed, dropping her sandals to the floor. "It's always about college."
"Well he's just excited. Like you said, you're his last hope. He's always ripping into Jack."
So it is about Jack. The old Ashley must've told her that. "Yeah I guess. It just gets old after a while. Not knowing where else to sit, I plop on the bed next to her. She looks good tonight. She's wearing a blue dress with floral patterns. The cut of the dress goes far enough down that it shows quite a bit of cleavage without being inappropriate. She has a nice pair of breasts, the Ben side of me thinks.
"You know what you're wearing to Brian's tomorrow night," she asks.
I shake my head. "No. Haven't thought about it."
"Are you and Brian going to get up to anything?" Though she's pretending to be teasing me, I can tell there's genuine curiosity there.
"I don't know." I sound shy and I can't tell if I'm feigning it or if I really am.
"What if he makes a move? Like asks you to his bedroom or something. You going to say yes?"
Shit. That thought hasn't actually occurred to me yet. "I don't know. Maybe I'll say yes," I answer, curling up into a ball with my head on my knees. "What would you say?"
She looks at me lamely. "You know what I would say."
I guess she would jump in bed with him at a moment's notice. She seemed to be into him that night at The Wall. I try to change the subject.
