How to Date a Superhero

Penny woke on a king-sized bed, her naked limbs spread out across much of its surface. It was pleasant, she thought, to sleep in a large bed versus the much smaller bed she was forced to use in her apartment. She inhaled a deep yawning breath and smiled, smelling Apollo's musky scent in the sheets. He wasn't in bed with her, but Penny heard the shower running and knew he wasn't far. She saw no reason to rush out of bed and closed her eyes to get a few more minutes of sleep.

A female voice said, "You do realize you're no different from any of the others?"

Penny sat up like a shot, startled by the voice. "Artemis," she breathed, tugging on the bed sheet to make sure her modesty remained intact.

Apollo's sister was leaning against the bedroom's doorframe wearing her leather pants, corset, and soft boots. She didn't have her bow, but a short blade was strapped to her right thigh. Artemis' blonde hair was tied neatly into a ponytail, though several curly wisps had escaped to perfectly frame her face. Penny felt jealous of Artemis' seemingly effortless beauty and pushed a hand through her own hair, which was suitably messy from a night's worth of sleep and lovemaking with Apollo.

"What are you doing in here?" she asked, irritated by Artemis' intrusion.

"You think you're different," Artemis folded her arms across her chest and ignored Penny's question, "But my brother will grow tired of you soon enough, despite whatever he may have told you. Has he professed his love for you yet?"

Penny clutched the sheet against her chest, "No. And I wouldn't expect him to."

"Ah," Artemis chuckled, "But surely he's promised to forsake all others?"

Penny's eyes narrowed dangerously, "What your brother has or hasn't said to me is none of your business."

"No need to grow upset," Artemis smirked, "I know how you'll feel. Apollo abandoned me, just as he will leave you. I never would have thought it possible, for we were very close as children. I'm his twin, the one person who understands him better than any other in the universe. If he could walk away from me, what hope does a lovesick teenaged mortal like you have of holding onto him?"

In a fury, Penny literally flew out of bed, the sheet covering her flung to the side. Her feet didn't touch the floor until she reached the doorway where she grabbed Artemis by the throat, lifted her with an outstretched arm, and roughly slammed her against the bedroom wall.

Penny's lips twisted into a scowl, "I'm almost twenty, bitch."

Artemis desperately clutched at Penny's wrist, her feet dangling a foot off the floor, trying to breathe.

Though her naked 5'7" frame was much more petite than Artemis' statuesque figure, Penny had no problem holding the squirming goddess in place, "Do not make the mistake that I am some poor, frail mortal who can't defend herself against you 'high and mighty' gods. I stood toe-to-toe with your brother and I'm pretty sure you don't have even half his strength or power. So keep talking shit, Artemis, and give me an excuse to snap you in half like a cracker."

Artemis gasped for air when Penny released her, dropping to her feet and clutching at her throat.

"I'm sorry if my being with Apollo makes you jealous," Penny said, finding a pair of Apollo's boxer briefs and sliding them up her slender legs, "You're just going to have to deal with it."

Artemis rubbed her throat and glared as Penny found one of Apollo's shirts and put it on. "You'll regret that," she seethed.

Penny buttoned the shirt halfway and rolled up its sleeves on her wrists. "Bring it on," she muttered confidently, feeling every bit the lioness Apollo had labeled her.

Finished with his shower, Apollo appeared from the adjoining bathroom, fastening a towel around his waist. He took one look at Penny in his shirt, her slender legs poking out beneath, and growled approvingly. Crossing the room he put an arm around her, clasped her bottom through the tails of the shirt, and kissed her.

Artemis watched the exchange with jealous eyes.

Penny happily returned the kiss and let Apollo palm her backside for several moments, knowing Artemis wouldn't enjoy the show.

"Sister," Apollo finally acknowledged Artemis after letting Penny know how sexy he thought she looked, "You've returned."

Artemis gave Penny one last glare before nodding, "I found your demon."

Penny had fetched her duffel bag and was searching for a hair brush when she paused and glanced, "Wait, what? Demon?"

Artemis looked to Apollo, "You didn't tell her?"

"Lauren Smith," Apollo said to Penny, "She is a demonic shape-shifter. Artemis recognized the scent easily."

"Seriously?" Penny didn't look entirely certain what that meant.

"It's worse," Artemis informed them, "She's a succubus."

Apollo grunted, not surprised. "T'would explain her ease in twisting my mind against Penelope."

Penny abandoned her bag, "Are you guys saying that the person...or whatever... the thing that wants to kill me is from Olympus?"

"Not Olympus," Artemis replied, "Demons spawn from Hades, the underworld land of the dead."

Apollo added gravely, "The domain of our uncle, Pluto."

"That doesn't make any sense," Penny said, "Why would a demon from Hades want to kill me?"

"It's of no concern to me and I didn't confront it to ask," Artemis pulled a scrap of paper from her pocket, "I've written down the street and dwelling number where the creature has been playing with some mortal fool. Give me the bow and I'll leave the two of you to ask it all the questions you want."

Apollo frowned, "We may need thee, sister. Thy skills could prove valuable in catching it."

"That wasn't our deal," Artemis argued, "You wanted me to locate the creature in trade for Minerva's bow. I've held my end of our bargain."

"Just give her the bow," Penny told Apollo, happy to be rid of Artemis sooner rather than later. "I think the two of us can handle one demon. Right?"

Apollo grunted and moved to a closet, retrieving the bow and a quiver of arrows. He traded it for Artemis' scrap of paper.

Artemis slung the bow and quiver over a shoulder, "Good hunting, Apollo."

"Will you return to Olympus?" he asked, curious.

"Eventually," Artemis shrugged, "I think I may explore this new mortal world, first." She turned and walked out of the room, wandering down the hallway.

"We should go find her right away," Penny suggested. "Good thing I brought a spare costume," she winked, referencing the fact that Apollo had ripped the one she had been wearing right off her body.

"Aye," Apollo chuckled.

Penny moved toward her bag again, but then shouted in pain as an arrow suddenly tore through her left thigh.

"Penelope!" Apollo rushed to her.

"Ow! Fuck!" Penny crumpled into his arms, her leg giving out beneath her.

Apollo fell to his knees and gathered Penny into his lap, turning towards the bedroom door where the arrow came from. There stood Artemis at the end of the hall, Minerva's bow held aloft - the ancient bow able to bypass any armor, including Penny's invulnerability.

"Why!?" Apollo screamed angrily towards his sister.

Artemis lowered the bow with a wicked grin, "I told her she'd regret it."

And then Artemis was gone, striding towards the elevator.

=======

Stanley Lee was a nervous-looking man in his mid-thirties, constantly fidgeting with something on his person. He pushed up thick glasses that had slid too far down his nose, checked his watch for the twelfth time, and then pushed a stray strand of his greasy brown hair behind an ear.

Standing beside Stanley in a descending elevator was Kirby Jackson, a brick of a man who was a five year veteran guard at the Blockade supermax prison. He was dressed in full riot gear which included shell-like armor, a shield, and a holstered machine-pistol.

Kirby glanced aside, "You seem a little out of sorts, Mr. Lee."

"Yes," Stanly cleared his throat, "Well, I am about to interview one of the most dangerous individuals on the planet."

Kirby chuckled, "You've got nothing to fear, Mr. Lee. His cell contains a neutralizing anti-gravity suspension field, and we've got him sixty stories below ground level beneath one-thousand tons of concrete."

The elevator made a sound before its doors slid open to a long concrete hallway lit with flickering fluorescents. There was a guard station at the end of the hall where Stanley had to sign in. The guard there frisked Stanley and made him empty his pockets, which held his car keys and an old audio recording device that used miniature tape cassettes.

"I need my recorder," Stanley said when the door guard put his things into a holding basket, "I was told I'd be allowed to use it."

The guard looked to Kirby, who nodded his assent, and then handed the recorder to Stanley.

"You have thirty minutes, Mr. Lee." Kirby moved to the door and unlocked it with a palm-scanning device, "Would you like a guard present in the room with you?"

Stanley shook his head, "That won't be necessary," and entered the room. The heavy door shut behind him. Inside the room there was a lone chair facing the opposite wall, which had a wide window looking into an immense cell. The concrete cell was sparse, containing only one thing - The Leviathan.

At twelve feet tall and weighing close to half a ton, The Leviathan was a monstrosity of a man formed seemingly from pure muscle. Every inch of his bluish-grey skin seemed to bulge with the power of his strength. He was bald; his scalp ridged as though his skull was made of chitinous bone right beneath the skin. His only article of clothing was a pair of bright orange pants.

The Leviathan was facing the window suspended in mid-air with his arms and legs spread akimbo, a product of a state-of-the-art anti-gravity suspension field that rendered his strength useless by not allowing him to touch anything.

"YOU A FUNNY-LOOKING MAN," The Leviathan boomed, his voice deep and immense.

Stanley clicked on his tape recorder and set it on the window sill between them, "We don't have much time. In a moment, you're going to be free."

"FREE...?" The Leviathan seemed confused.

"There is a hallway beyond the door behind me," Stanley explained, "Which leads to an elevator shaft. You should be able to crawl up it. Once you reach the top, smash your way out of the prison and go to the north. Do you understand 'north'?"

"LEVIATHAN... SMASH... NORTH."

Stanley nodded, "The man who sent me will be waiting for you in a freight helicopter roughly ten miles north of here. From there, he can secure your freedom."

"LEVIATHAN FREE."

On the tape recorder, a little light suddenly turned red. Stanley closed his eyes and whispered, "Goodbye cruel wor-"

The explosion filled The Leviathan's cell with an inferno of heat and flame, its force crushing concrete walls to rubble. Stanley Lee was incinerated instantly, as were Kirby Jackson and his fellow guard in the hallway outside. So intense was the heat that it burnt the very air in the cell and the hallway beyond, creating a temporary vacuum that snuffed out the flames. When it was over, only sooty rubble remained.

From out of the dust crawled The Leviathan, free from the damaged anti-gravity field. His bluish-grey skin was blackened from the explosion, and his pants were in tatters, but he was otherwise unharmed. Pushing large chunks of concrete out of his way as though they were made of rice patties, The Leviathan made his way to the elevator shaft and ripped its doors free. Digging his hands and feet into the walls of the shaft, the hulking villain began the sixty-story climb to the surface.

Alarms were sounding and Blockade guards in riot gear were mobilizing, but very little on the planet could damage or stop The Leviathan. He smashed through walls and cell blocks almost effortlessly, bullets bouncing harmlessly off his invulnerable skin. Many other super-powered criminals housed in the Blockade suddenly found themselves free, adding to the chaos.

"NOTHING CAN STOP LEVIATHAN!!" he yelled, barreling through a thick wall of steel-reinforced concrete to reach the outside.

The Leviathan lifted his arm to shield squinting eyes against the morning sun, something he hadn't seen in months. Then, pushing off with tree stump-like legs, he launched himself into the air and cleared the Blockade's outer fences with one massive leap.

Fortunately the Blockade was in a very rural part of Illinois, roughly sixty miles north of Gateway City, so there was nothing in The Leviathan's way as he continued to travel northward, clearing a half-mile with every leap. He spotted the helicopter Stanley Lee mentioned while in the air, mid-jump. He landed and leapt towards it, landing again just a short sprint away.

The freight-helicopter's blades were already spinning in preparation for take-off and a man in a garish-looking multi-colored costume stood beside it.

"Hello my immense friend!" he had to yell to be heard over the copter.

"LEVIATHAN FREE!"

"Yes you are," the man smiled broadly, "Courtesy of... Master Disaster!"

=======

Penny winced in pain as Apollo snapped the arrow by its tip, so that the pointed arrowhead wouldn't tear her leg up further when it came time to pull it out.

"I am going to kick your sister's ass," she grimaced, laying on Apollo's carpeted bedroom floor. Her wounded left leg was bent at the knee where Apollo was knelt beside her.

He grasped the arrow by its feathers, on the backside of Penny's thigh. "This will hurt," he warned.

Penny nodded and gritted her teeth.

Apollo yanked, pulling the remaining shaft out. She screamed in pain as it slid out of her leg. Quickly, he pressed some gauze against the wound and held it firmly to the underside of her thigh to stem the bleeding.

"It's a... good thing... I heal quickly," Penny said in a shaky voice, her face ashen and sweaty. "I found that out after... the first time I was shot with that damned bow."

Apollo took her hand and placed it over her wound. "Hold that there," he said, reaching for a bandage roll from the same first-aid kit he found the gauze. He covered the exit wound on the top half of her thigh as well and then began wrapping her leg tightly with the bandage.

"It is unfortunate Hermes is not here," Apollo stated, fastening the bandage in place with small metal clips, "He is more skilled at medicines."

"You're doing fine," Penny attempted a smile.

Apollo scooped her up, one of his arms beneath her knees the other under her shoulders, and carried her towards his bed. "What do you need?" he asked, lying her down and situating a soft pillow beneath her wounded leg.

"Nothing," Penny shook her head, "Maybe something to drink. Water."

Apollo sat on the bed's edge and brushed at her forehead, pushing aside some hair that was matted there by sweat, "I should call someone to be with thee. Is there anyone who has thy trust?"

Penny clutched at his wrist, "Why, where are you going?"

"I must find the demon Lauren Smith," he replied, "Before she leaves the house where Artemis found her."

Penny didn't want Apollo to leave but she understood how pressing it was to find the demon and get some answers as to why it wanted Mega-Girl dead. "I'll be fine," she assured him, "Just hurry back?"

Apollo lowered a kiss to her brow, "All the demons in Hades could not slow my haste. I'll get thee some water before I go."

Penny nodded and let go of his arm, "Apollo...?"

He looked to her as he rose, "Aye?"

"I'd never come between you and your sister. You know that, right? Even after this. She's jealous of me for some reason, like I'm trying to keep you away from her, but I'm not."

"Dealing with Artemis will have to wait."

Penny nodded, "Be careful, okay? Don't let that demon bitch get into your head again."

=======

Apollo knew the neighborhood where his sister found the succubus and appeared high in the air above the maze of middle-class suburbia, the light of his teleportation absorbed by the afternoon sky. Sunlight reflected brightly off Apollo's golden breastplate and he adjusted his leather bracers as he hovered, looking down at the people and cars as though they were little insects. The wicked spear which had claimed so many lives over the centuries was secured at Apollo's back, a silvery helmet decorated with a pluming red Mohawk was on his head, and his black cingulum - a studded skirt of leather strips - covered the top half of his muscled thighs. He was ready for battle.

Landing in the middle of a street, Apollo guessed the house's approximate location and began to scan address numbers. A young boy who was riding by on a bike suddenly skidded to a stop and stared at the impressively armored god.

"Holy cow!" the boy exclaimed excitedly, "You're Apollo, aren't you?"

Apollo glanced to the boy, who was barely as tall as Apollo's stomach. "Aye," he replied in his deep voice.

"This is so cool! You're my favorite superhero! Well, after Mega-Girl of course. But you're definitely my mom's favorite! I heard her tell Mrs. Thompson that she could grate cheese on your abs. Can I see your helmet? It's so neat!"

Apollo spotted the house he was looking for and asked, "What is thy name, boy?"

"I'm Kenny."

Taking his helmet off, Apollo indicated his target with a dip of his head, "Tell me who lives there, Kenny, and my helmet shall be thine."

Kenny looked, "That's Mr. Johnson's house; he lives just two doors down from me and my mom."

"Does this Johnson have a family?" Apollo's eyes narrowed at a minivan in the driveway.

Kenny shook his head, "He has a daughter that shows up on weekends sometimes, but she goes to school somewhere else. I think she lives with her mom or something. I don't know because she's kind of weird and I mostly avoid her."

Apollo handed Kenny his helmet and began walking towards the house, withdrawing his spear from its harness.

The helmet engulfed Kenny's small head when he put it on, "Wait until mom finds out I met Apollo!"

A bronze door handle crumpled and broke away easily under his strength as Apollo cautiously entered the house, his spear tip leading the way. Though he didn't doubt his unquestionable power, Apollo knew well the trickeries of succubus and reminded himself to be wary. The creatures were able to shift their shape and his 'Lauren Smith' could appear entirely different than the last time he saw her.

The house was quiet as Apollo moved from room to room, his leather sandals making little sound. He cleared the first floor and climbed a stairway. The first bedroom on the second floor appeared to be a child's room, no doubt the daughter Kenny had mentioned, but it was empty. As he moved to the next doorway Apollo heard a muffled voice on the other side. He pushed gently on the door with his spear, prodding it open to reveal a second bedroom. Inside was a middle-aged man tied to the bed, his wrists and ankles secured with rope; he was gagged and naked. Apollo assumed it was Mr. Johnson and quickly scanned the rest of the room, spotting another open doorway leading to the master bath.

"I think I'm going to fuck you with my strap-on," a woman's voice was saying from within the bathroom, "I know you're going to love it. Most of you mortal men are closet homosexuals to one degree or another, after all."

The man on the bed saw Apollo and his eyes widened with alarm. He began to struggle against his bonds and moan loudly through the gag.

"Don't throw a fit," Rapture said as she walked out of the bathroom, dressed in her black lacy corset and thigh-highs. A rubber penis hung between her legs, "I'll be very gent-"

Her mouth suddenly hung open in shock as the spear penetrated her guts, fully impaling her. The silvery weapon throbbed with a hungry pulse of light, as though it knew it had just tasted demonic blood. "...Apollo..." she gasped in a gurgling voice.