"You're the sixty-ninth caller!" the voice on the other end of the phone yelled into Justin's ear.
"Yeah? Wow! Did I win the new Eminem CD?"
"You sure did! And..."
Justin had never won one of these silly radio contests before. Though it was just a silly CD, he was thrilled to have finally won something. His radio played a Honda ad in the background followed by a crazed deejay shouting, "You're the sixty-ninth caller!" and his own voice saying, "Yeah?"
"Could you turn your radio down, sir?" the deejay asked over the phone.
"Oh, okay?"
With phone to ear, he walked over and turned his radio off.
"What's your name?" the deejay asked.
"Justin."
"Okay, Justin. You just won Eminem's latest CD; and if you can answer the next ten questions, you'll win the grand prize!"
"Cool! Ask away!"
"Who let the dogs out?"
"Huh?" Justin asked.
"You heard me!" the deejay scolded him. "Who let the frickin dogs out? C'mon! Five seconds..."
"Uhm, oh yeah. That was Baha Men!"
"That's correct! But where were they going without ever knowing the way?"
"Oh! I heard that before..."
"Five seconds!"
"Oh yeah, that from The Way! Fastball!"
"Correct! Now, who was driving that black Mitsubishi?"
"Ha! He never said who was driving it, but that's from Eminem, One Shot Two Shot."
"Correct! What's the frequency, Kenneth?"
"Hey! I said my name's Justin!"
"Five seconds!"
"Oh! Yeah--that's--uhm--uhm..."
"Two seconds!"
"R.E.M. from their Monster CD!"
"Correct! Who can say if your love grows as your heart chose?"
"Oh! That's from some sappy love song a few years ago. Uhm--uhm..."
"Five seconds!"
"Something about time..."
"Two seconds..."
"Only Time, by, uhm, Enya, I think..."
"Correct! What are you doin' in my life?"
"Oh! That song rocks! That's Tom Petty, Damn The Torpedoes!"
"Correct! How can you have any pudding if you don't eat your meat?"
"I know that one!" Justin yelled back. "That's from Pink Floyd, The Wall!"
"Correct! Now where are you tonight, sweet Marie?"
"Oh! That's easy! Bob Dylan! Absolutely Sweet Marie!"
"Correct! Who put the 'bop' in the 'bop-she-bop-she-bop'?"
"Oh, what's that movie about the 50's?"
"Five seconds!"
"American Pie? No! Grease!"
"Correct! If you answer the next question right, you'll be the first to win the grand prize! But it's a tough one! Ready?"
"I guess so. Go ahead."
"Birds can fly, fish can swim, but on this planet, where do I fit in?"
"I know that song! That's Shakespeare's Sister, Moonchild! The next line goes something like, 'Sometimes I feel like I'm an alien.' I literally emphasize with that song!"
"We have a grand prize winner on Sixty-Nine XXX!"
"Really? I won the grand prize!"
"You sure did, dude! And you know what it is?"
"Uh, no, not really."
"You won a model 3X69 fembot from Shinra. That's their bleeding-edge technology, top-of-the-line robot, with a list price of $175,000!"
"I won a fembot?"
"Ain't that cool?"
"Yeah, I guess," he said. All his friends owned fembots, but he couldn't understand why any guy would want a robot over a live human girl.
"Great! Stay on the line while we go to XXX news."
The deejay transferred him to some clerk who took his name, number, and address.
He received a letter from WXXX radio the following week with a prize certificate. So, with certificate in hand, he stopped in at the local Shinra dealer Friday night on his way home from work. His old, rusty 2020 Honda left a smoky trail of burning oil all the way.
"May I help you?" a pretty receptionist asked as he entered the lobby.
"Yeah." He showed her his certificate from the radio station.
She looked at the certificate and said, "Have a seat please. Someone will be with you in a moment."
About ten minutes later, a man in a white blazer came out with his hand extended. "Welcome to Shinra! I'm Brian. Are you the prize winner from WXXX?"
"Yeah." Justin stood. "I'm Justin."
"Okay, Justin. Follow me please."
"Sir? I was wondering if I could just have the money instead of the fembot?"
"Well, the radio station already purchased her, and she now belongs to you. But I guess you could always sell her on eBay or something."
"Okay," Justin said and followed the salesman into a small, cozy den-like room where a secretary was sitting at a small round table with a pile of legal papers.
Of course, the fact that she was really cute, with short jet-black hair didn't escape Justin's notice.
Brian brought Justin over to the table and said, "Have a seat at the table please, Justin."
Justin sat at the table, and the salesman sat next to him. The secretary moved to the seat next to Justin and smiled at him.
_Forget the stupid fembot,_ Justin thought, _I'm asking HER out when this is over!_
"Justin," Brian said, pointing at the woman, "this is Aerith."
To Aerith, he said, "Aerith, this is Justin."
"Hi Aerith," Justin said, looking into her light brown eyes. "Nice to meet you."
She smiled back and said, "It's nice to meet you too, Justin."
Brian pulled a page off the top of the pile and slid it in front of Justin and said something that Justin didn't hear.
"Justin!" the salesman said and tapped on the table.
Justin broke the eye-lock with the cute secretary and looked over at Brian. "Yes?"
The salesman handed Justin a pen and pointed at the form. "This is the title for the fembot, sign here."
Justin signed the form, and the next, and the next.