How can I still be alive?
Time held no meaning for him. Davariel's life had become a blur of continuous torture. If they weren't fucking him, they were beating him, tearing his flesh, biting out chunks of it. Only his face remained untouched. They told him Lucifer wanted the privilege of ripping Davariel's pretty face off himself.
He dreamed of Luciel, drifting in and out of consciousness, holding on to his happy thought in desperation.
Soon. Soon the end will come. He tried to console himself.
Through the pain, he clung to the memory of Luciel, her scent, her face, her fiery temper.
"My love," he whispered in delirium as the fallen angels continued to defile him.
They laughed, scoring his flesh with their sharp nails and fangs. He didn't even flinch at the mutilation of his body. He was past feeling. He simply prayed the end would come quickly.
After a while, they grew bored with their limp ragdoll and left him alone.
Davariel lay listless on the filthy ground, covered in blood and semen. His heart beat in an erratic rhythm as he waited for it to stop. However, to his dismay, it kept right on beating, stuttering now and then.
Why?
One of the younger she-devils came over sniffing at him. Her image swam before his bleary eyes.
She was different from the others in how she looked and acted, and usually stayed away. He'd seen her many times scratching and pulling at her skin as if being encased in a body made her uncomfortable.
Now she sniffed at him, watching the demons in trepidation. His eyes drifted shut. The female poked lightly at him and after a long moment began the task of tongue bathing him like a cat. Her tongue was a bit raspy and made his wounds sting, reminding him he was still alive. He hadn't the strength to wave her away...he couldn't even groan. When would death bless him with escape?
Briefly, and to his somber amusement, he felt her trying to grasp him under his arms, trying to pull him away. A threatening growl from one of the demons had her ceasing her efforts and scurrying away.
Then all sounds and sensations ceased.
He dreamt of a beautiful woman cradling him in her arms. She was a feminine version of himself.
For the longest moment all he could do was stare at her. She was humming to him and stroking his hair back from his forehead. The woman just hummed and smiled at him.
"Are you my mother?" He finally asked.
Her blue eyes shimmered with moisture. "Something akin to that." Her delicate hand caressed his cheek.
"Why did you abandon me?" Strange. He felt weak even in this dream. Maybe she was a real angel and had come to take him away. The thought gave him comfort. She probably died giving him birth and now she would take him with her. Perhaps she hadn't abandoned him after all. He was just about to apologize for having caused her demise, but she began to speak.
"I couldn't keep you. I had no physical form."
"I don't understand." His wanted to touch her face, but he felt so weak. His eyes caressed what he hadn't the strength to touch.
"I fell in love with a Seraphian reaper I'd been feeding from and possessed a young Seraphian female to entice him into coupling." She bit her lip, looking uncomfortable, then continued. "I became pregnant. I didn't know that was possible. The woman would only show her pregnancy when I possessed her. I felt the presence of your soul inside me." Her golden brows drew together showing her confusion. She sighed, closed her eyes, and shook her head. "It was a punishment...for having fallen in love. When it was time for you to be born, my spirit became trapped in the Seraph's body until we birthed you. She was horrified because she'd been a virgin and didn't remember having lain with anyone. She wrapped you in rags, without even gazing upon you, and ran to the edge of a cliff to throw you down into the ocean. I begged her not to...she couldn't hear me...but then you began to cry. The sound of your sweet voice enthralled her, so she decided to leave you at the gates of Angelos, because you were a reaper."
"What are you? What am I?"
"In this realm I was cursed by Lucifer. He turned me into a succubus. You, my son, are a cambion. We were angels, Davariel. Alpha angels, because we were God's brightest. Lucifer was jealous of our splendor and tossed us down into this realm." For a moment, Davariel remembered falling... reaching down to a being made of pure white energy. He didn't understand where the memory came from. "There were seven of us," she continued. "Inside your soul you held the essence of the last two. Devon has already been released. The essence of the last angel is now with him."
Davariel's mind reeled. "Who's my father? Was he an angel too?"
She looked sad. "You killed him. His name was Gadriel. Lucifer corrupted his soul in an attempt to turn you against God." She caressed his face. "It almost worked."
Davariel felt filled with revulsion. His own father...everything they'd done... "I'm-I'm an abomination! Why didn't you let that woman drown me? I never should have been born."
She hung her head, her golden hair veiling her face and sobbed.
Her tears rained on his face filling him with sorrow. "M-mother?" Mother, I'm sorry for causing you pain.
The dream faded.
The feel of cool water against his parched lips made him stir. At first, he instinctively swallowed with his bruised throat, then thought better and refused it. He only prolonged his agony by consuming water. If he stopped, then his days would be shorter.
He wondered where he would go once he transcended. Would the Divine One send him directly to hell, or would he be sent back to this realm to try again? If he reincarnated, he hoped that this time he'd be someone or something a little more normal. How wonderful it would be to come back as a plant, just stand beneath the sun all day and wait for the rains! Better yet, he could be an Edenian toad. One of his reaper baby sisters received one as a gift from her parents. She had told him they lived in ponds, sat on lily pads and ate flies. It was an ugly, slimy little creature, but made the funniest sound and hopped fast. He remembered giggling with Amaranth, trying to catch it when they were still chicklings.
Someone was trying to lift him again.
"I want to be a toad," he murmured, his voice barely above a whisper. Something nudged him onto his back. "I'll s-sit... on a li-pad an eat fie..." He felt himself fading again.
Voices sounded near him. They seemed familiar.
Someone was worrying about swallowing him and then he felt himself rolling onto a wet, warm surface.
Blackness.
He heard a woman's cry. She was sobbing!
A curl of terror gripped his insides making him want to throw up. Had they found Luci? Was she fool enough to have come back looking for him? Were they hurting her too now? The thought had fury burning like fire through him. His instinct to destroy and kill arose like a black demon within his heart. If only his body weren't so broken already.
