Author's Notes:
Hey there! If this is your first time checking out the series, you shouldn't have any problem figuring out where things stand with this chapter/volume, but if you like what you read, please consider taking a look at the first chapter (also on this site and my account).
This chapter was brought to you by the very generous donations and patronage of fans of the series who help me buy food and warm socks so I can write smut for you!
These wonderful people are the reason you're reading this, so please give them a thanks!
Alonsis
Asmund Bell
Apothecary29
David A.
Orodreth
Drawkward
*****
Volume 3 Chapter 2
2- Service and Servitude 2
The forested regions around Beson were a thick mess of tangled brambles and vines that waged a constant battle with the road crews to subsume the narrow lanes that crisscrossed the dense brush, allowing a glimmer of hope for the trade hub. The roads were wide enough to support the Duke's proud stallion and his cadre of mounted soldiers alongside their equipment, but there was always that feeling that someone was watching. There wasn't anything immediately dangerous in the thick brush, but as the wind rustled through the dense canopy of leaves far above, one couldn't help but feel the eyes of some unseen entity following them.
Amaranth and Markus strode forward of the caravan on foot with their horses trailing at a body's length. They hadn't said anything since leaving the city and, in typical fashion, Markus wasn't going to be the one to break the heavy silence between them. Amaranth wasn't in a hurry, either, but some things needed to be said. . .
She opened her mouth but Markus pre-empted her, "this is bullshit."
"Hm?"
"You said it yourself, even if we did get there in time, how're we going to arm and prepare a force big enough to help the knife eared-"
Amaranth cleared her throat loudly.
"You know what I mean," he didn't even blink at the casual racial slur. "They're the ones that won't bury the hatchet, why're we expected to stand in front of the arrow for them? Richard's father would roll over in his grave if he knew."
"Markus. . ."
"Oh come on, Ammy," he spared her a glance. "The elves can't be trusted with humans, you know that. Hell, your parents
abandoned
you, don't tell me you're going to defend them-"
"I'm-" She stopped herself.
I'm pregnant
is what she wanted to say. She knew better, though, and so Amaranth bit deep into her tongue until she tasted copper.
Not now, don't be rash.
She glanced to the underbrush for a second as though she heard a sound. Markus followed her gaze until they passed the spot, by which time Amaranth had collected her thoughts. "They were of two worlds, they knew it couldn't possibly work out." She cast a glance his way. "The elven mind is a slippery thing when you look at it from the perspective of a human lifetime."
"What's that say about us?"
Us, she mused. "Tch." She shook her head. "We have a good thing, why worry ourselves with what could happen between us?"
"Who said I'm worried for
us
? I was talking about our troops." Before she could muster a reply, he shrugged. "You keep focusing on 'us' and-" he glanced back as though Richard might hear them- he probably could- "and we both know you're too selfish to commit to anything."
"Hmph."
"Truth hurt?"
Amaranth's ear twitched as a familiar heat flushed her cheeks. "That's not fair."
"Doesn't mean it's not true."
"Markus. . ."
"I get it, I do. It's the fey blood, no one's blaming you-"
"This is hardly the place for such a discussion. Not only that, my blood has nothing to do with-"
"How selfish you are?"
"How selfish I am-" she caught herself a tad late. "Dammit!"
He laughed.
"That's not funny, Markus."
"Oh, I don't know, I thought it was."
The half-elven knight shot him a dirty look she didn't believe in and, for no real reason at all, she stuck her tongue out at him.
"Promises, promises." He grinned. "Seriously, though. You know this isn't going to work out."
For a moment she thought he may have been talking about their relationship, but with his attention lingering on the forest, she pieced together his meaning. At least she thought so. She took a shot in the dark, non-committal even in her glance. "I know."
"Then why didn't you stop him?"
It verified her concerns, at least there was that. "How am I supposed to do that? I've known him since he was a boy, once he gets it in his head to do something it's going to get done come hell or low ground."
"High water," Markus corrected.
"Only if you're in the low ground does high water become an issue," she shot back. "Don't correct your elders."
"Hmph."
It was her turn to grin. "We have bigger things to worry about than who's right or wrong, hm? We've a duty to perform and a
lot
of work to do if we're going to get the allies he needs to carry this out."
"Spoken like a true paladin."
"You say that like it's a bad thing."
"I wonder, sometimes. . ."
"You aren't the only one," she said softly. The half-elf fell silent as they continued down the path. All the while, that quiet voice in the back of her mind whispered the concern she'd been harboring for the last three months; what kind of chance would she have at balancing motherhood with her duties. It was something that had kept her up more than a few nights over the last months, but now the question wasn't a concern so much as a demand. She needed to figure out her next move and she needed to do it quickly, before the choice was made for her.
"What's on your mind, Ammy?"
Her gaze lingered on Markus for a long moment. Was
he
ready for this any more than she was? "Hm?"
"You're staring."
"You're just impatient. . . I was- ah- admiring."
"You're so full of shit."
She sighed faintly. "I'm being selfish. . ."
Markus didn't comment right away, letting the statement hang in the air between them like an axe as they continued down the packed dirt trail. It was maddening to someone without the patience to deal with long stretches of silence, but wholly understandable given the topic; the two of them were just like her parents. At least the ones her mind had imagined for her. He might have made a good father, but their life was an uncomplicated one and their passions were fueled by that simplicity. That had changed for Amaranth with her pregnancy and the now even arm's length distance between them felt like a canyon.
Three months. Three months and he didn't know yet. . . She swallowed. This couldn't go on. She had built this chasm with her silence, withdrawing into herself while she wrestled with the weakness in herself. She wasn't even sure their child was strictly
his
, but as the days wore on to weeks and from those weeks months eroded their once proud, frivolous life.
It had been her fault, yet she couldn't bring herself to bear the blame alone; they were knights, and she a paladin. There were appearances to keep up, and if the other possibility- that the child wasn't
his-
then the implications for all involved could be severe indeed.