I awoke to the aluminum synchronicity once again today, the grinding, rhythmic screech of robot on robot physicality. Yeah, I know what everyone says, they are inanimate objects, fully digital with no emotion and certainly no libido. Well I don't care what anyone says, I for the third time this week I woke up in the morning to the freakish sounds of robot sex.
You know, at first it was humorous, like when my two robot vacuums started going at it like some electronic turtles, but it kept getting worse. First it was those furry creatures, the robotic dogs and cats, the little gerbils, and now the robotic pigs. It wouldn't be so bad if they would stick to their pretend species, you know, the robotic dogs doing other dogs, cats with cats, but damn, these things see each other as the same so you have dogs humping the gerbils, pigs and cats, it's all so disgusting.
Soon the servo butler and maid joined in the festivities. To be honest, it was a bit of a turn on to watch the maid and butler. His telescoping cock really did some amazing things to that maid. I'd swear she was about to blow several fuses when he started whirling that thing inside her. Yeah for a while it was good, but when the maid caught the butler with a mechano-gerbil whirling on his lap the fun was over. All she does now is let those robot vacuums vacuum her all afternoon.
Okay, yes I contacted customer support and I do understand the limits of their warranties. How was I to know that certain robot models have a natural affinity to certain other robot models. Who would have guessed the butler robot would prefer furry little creatures to the maid robot. That maid robot had some potential, if I didn't have my own personal ISlut I might have been diving in between those titanium legs.
Anyway, as I said, this morning was the final straw. Besides all the noise, my ISlut somehow got herself all worked up and before I could get out of bed to stop all the robotic fucking going on all over my house I had to take care of her. I hoped some ICunnilingus would settle her, I mean in the past sliding my tongue into her soft sensation ports would completely satisfy her, but even though she was texting her IFriends about how good her climax was, I still had to roll onto my back for some reverse cowpod IFucking. Hell she even rode me until I came inside her, so I'll have to be cleaning my cum out of carrying case for the next day or so.
When I finally could pull away from my ISlut, I rushed into the living room and nearly fell to my knees as sparks flew across the room, hydraulic fluid was being ejaculated everywhere, and the maid robot had fucked the bristles off my electric toothbrush. At that point I just snapped grabbing the first robotic vacuum I could reach and flung it out my patio door like a frisbee. For a moment I thought it might fly off, but then it fell to the ground twenty stories below. I was able to flush the mechano-gerbil but the robotic cat stopped up the toilet. And when the butler robot's telescoping cock ran up my leg and into my underwear, I had to drown the son of a bitch in the bathtub. Okay, okay, the son of a robotic specialist, anyway I had to drown it.
It seems almost everything had settled down, but when I returned to my bedroom, I caught the robot maid on top of my ISlut in an incredible digital 69. I was so turned on that I unzipped my shorts and penetrated the maid, but she never complained, not until she slipped into circuit overload three times. Damn thing comes three times and then says I IRaped her. She's a robot, not an ICreature, how can I IRape her?
So yes, I, William Gates IV do admit to tossing the robotic vacuum, flushing the mechano-gerbil and the robotic cat. I drowned the butler robot but was only in self defense and I did not, I emphatically did not IRape the robot maid.
After pausing a moment, I looked up at the police officer, then looked back down at the pad of paper I was writing on. I signed my name and filled in the date.