"The word in intrasolar politics today is unilateralism!"
The snide, snarky voice of Dan Chaps, the best podcaster on politics on the web (at least, according to the 16 to 24 progressive and liberal demographic) filled the ear of Annabelle Herman DuPont as she peddled down the crumbling I-280 North in what had once been the biggest, most bustling suburbs in California. Her bike's smart tires and efficient chain-gearing system, combined with her own long honed muscles, chewed up the miles faster than she'd have thought possible. Not many people biked the interstate â most people preferred greener paths.
But greener paths and other people meant that Annie had to worry
about
those other people. And she enjoyed turning her brain off and letting her muscles burn and her knees bend and her sweat bead and Dan Chaps fill her ears with the latest news today on Earth and aboard.
"Now, you may ask, what is unilateralism, Mr Chaps?" Dan chuckled. "Well, the idea was brought up in the late 90s, when the Indians first began to nuke Mars. The idea being that if we were
going
to terraform our own planet, why not begin terraforming our nearest, most similar neighbor? Bonus points if anyone out there said 'what, Venus?'" A happy chime rang out â one of Dan's trademark sound effects. "Now, before then, every decision made about space had been made under the UN emergency charter â solar shades, areosats, thorium mining, all that was finger quote owned end finger quote by specific nations, but they were in place under the UNEC EcoDev headquarters. That meant everyone on the Security Council got a say."
A pot hole the size of an old automobile loomed ahead of Annie. She twisted both bars and her bike skidded around the hole with the grace and adroitness of a great cat. One of the non-extinct ones at least.
"But when the Indians began their New Mars project, they did so...without...checking with the UNEC. The argument being that since it wasn't impacting
Earth
, the UN had no say. Now, if our glorious new world order overlords had any teeth, then there would have been snap back, wars, bar codes on the face, numbers of the beast, all the old fun stuff. Instead of that obvious and logical eventuality..." He sighed, dramatically. "For...some reason, the United Nations backed down and ceded back all the power that it had claimed during the 21
st
century. So, when the 22
nd
century came whining around, we were right back where we started. Just with a space infrastructure big enough to let every nationalist to fulfill their colonialist dreams like it was the age of sail all over again. Goodie!"
The normal exit that a car might have taken, a hundred years ago, had collapsed. When Annie rode towards it, she had pause and wobble in place as her bike's tires shifted their shape into something more rugged. She started to grunt as her bike climbed up the small hill of rubble, grass, and budding trees. She laughed as she rattled her way back down the hill and into the reclaimed suburbs beyond.
"Which brings us back to the here and now," Dan Chaps said. "Every decision made beyond Earth orbit for the past seventy years has been determined by what
one
country picked. The Chinese move asteroids. The Federal Government mines Ceres for water and slings it to Mars. The Indians introduced enigneered moss to Mars thirty years ago â a decision that will impact this solar system for
millions
of years...and the only people they had to answer to were...what? Their corporate masters?"
Annie shook her head.
Dan Chaps had a point.
But listening to him was a good way to get kinda...pissed off.
"And now we have the ultimate form of galling unilateralism, one that has actually drawn censure and commentary from the United Nations," Dan Chaps said as she peddled past an area where dozens of people in reflective vests and hard hats were working with electric tools and exoskeletons and crowbars to tear down the suburban sprawl that had been abandoned during the mid 21
st
century and left to rot. A few waved at her â and she waved back as Dan Chaps continued to upbraid the Chinese government.
"This is one of those unprecedented moments in human history. We have, by sheer bloody minded accident, blown a
goddamn
hole in space-time and smashed a moon to pieces with it. The Janus anomaly, oh, screw it, lets stop pussyfooting around, the Janus
wormhole
, is the most important things to happen since a certain mass murdering dipshit dropped an atomic bomb on a civilian target back in the 20
th
: To really hammer it in for you guys, lets say it again. Nothing. Will. Ever. Be. The. Same. We don't know what is there, what is through that portal, where it leads, what effects it will have on this entire solar system, hell, this entire
universe
. And what do the Chinese do? Without even bringing up the idea to their own people, they send a shuttle through!" He paused a beat. "
Five times
!"
Anne was about to shake her head in disbelief as she skimmed around the corner and came to the outskirts of her parents enclave when she nearly ran someone over. He stumbled out from behind an oak tree that was gamely and slowly pushing aside asphalt and concrete and who knows what else to burst free and claim the air it was due â and Anne reacted. She slammed on the brakes and swept herself to the side. Her wheels skidded, shifting their form while alerts chimed from the bike. Seeing it couldn't keep her safe with some wheel trickery, it sent a message to her riding suit, which popped off the rapid inflation impact surface.
Anne was catapulted from her seat and landed on her back, her helmet wrapping around her head with what felt like a thick, cotton mask. Her back hit the ground and she skidded nearly five feet before friction stopped her â and then groaned. She didn't feel much more than a few mild bumps and a faint, throbbing ache behind her eyes â but she still had to lay flat as a board for the few seconds it took for her suit to deflate and retract.
When it did so, brilliant sunlight shone in her eye â and brought a faint whimpering groan to her ears.
Anne's hear clenched. "Oh no no no no!" She scrambled to her feet. The enclave had a few old folks in it who sometimes liked to go for walks in the ruins â it kept them spry and fit. The nightmare she had was that she had clipped some hundred year old man, someone who had seen the worst disasters of the 21
st
century. Imagine surviving the flooding, the plagues, Rotlung, the civil war, the famines, and being taken out by a twenty something who hadn't even picked her trade school.
Anne ran over to the prone figure â and stopped dead.
Well.
They weren't old.
The man was quite possibly the most exquisitely beautiful men that Annie had seen in her life. And she watched porn. Like, an alarming amount of porn. He had the tall, narrow features she associated with Loonies, but not quite as pronounced. His muscles were well defined and his skin was porcelain pale â it practically shone under sunlight. He had no birthmarks or scars, but he did have a small, distinct tuft of chest hair that set him apart from the 'smoothboy' look that was pretty popular now a days. His face was delicate and feyish, with high cheek bones and thin lips, while his hair was midnight black and glossy. It was cut short and tousled â and Annie had the intense desire to rub her cheeks all against it, to see if it was really as silky as it looked.
Oh.