Dar Arrow

To all my readers who have followed me and all those who find this series for the first time with this chapter I want to extend my thanks for your feedback and comments. Every author says this at some point but until you've been in the authors shoes you don't realize how true it is. Feedback, comments, voting on our stories mean a great deal to us and we appreciate it more than we can express.

For Chapter 8 there isn't much to say. If you have not read this series, I highly suggest you read at minimum chapter 7 or much of this will not flow well for you. There is very minimal sex in this chapter in the form of memories.

For those interested the poem quoted is Invictus by William Ernest Henley

As always thanks to everyone who helped with ideas, encouragement, and editing.

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The wind tore at her. There was no going back. No changing how things had happened. She'd made her choice and all she had left to do was live out the consequences of that choice. One last breath. Just enough time for one last regret.

Then she was falling, fighting the urge to flail her arms uselessly against the rushing wind. Eyes squeezed shut she forced herself to try and calm down. Quietly she murmured words she'd heard her father say too many times to count. Words that hadn't been heard on Advocacy property in three decades.

"Out of the night that covers me. Black as the pit from pole to pole. I thank whatever gods may be for my unconquerable soul." Her eyes snapped open, alight with vengeance as she gripped the stock of the RM Magnum.

"In the fell clutch of circumstance I have not winced nor cried aloud," She whispered. Remembering the next verse of her father's favorite poem. "Under the bludgeoning of chance my head is bloody, but unbowed."

She took one last breath. "Time to end this," she whispered softly to herself as she brought the gun into firing position and braced for impact while her mind drifted for a second back over the last two days.

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30 Hours before.

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"Erillia." that word kept bouncing around in her head. Likely one of the first words if not the first word ever spoken to her in this life. God only knew if it might not be one of the last as well. Most recently it was the last word Ren spoke before he passed out and she cried herself to sleep.

"Oh god, Erillia." if she was going to be specific, as he'd thrust hard into her clutching depths grunting as his rigid cock pulsed while he filled her pussy with cum one last time. A few grunts and incoherent sounds were the only other noises he'd made. Then he had the gall to pass out under her!

Not that she could really blame him if she was being honest or fair. They had after all been fucking for several hours at that point and he'd cum in and on her six times already. Most men would have been done several times before especially since the preceding days hadn't exactly been a dry spell.

He'd told her he was spent the time before but she'd taunted him that she could get him up again. A feat that had taken her nearly a half hour itself and made her jaw ache, but she'd happily climbed aboard and angrily fucked him through several rolling orgasms until it was too much and he'd cum in her a final time.

She sat there catching her breath and finally realized he wasn't just relaxing under her.

The rhythmic rise and fall of his chest and the softening of the lines around his mouth and eyes told her he was well and truly gone. At first she'd been miffed that he could fall asleep like that, and then angry because of how the whole night, no, the whole week had gone.

After a short time though the sorrow broke through the anger. She'd relaxed and lay on his chest, covering them both with the sheet and blanket when she first shivered.

Only it wasn't the cold of the night air that had made her shiver. As she lay there on Ren's chest the slight quivering progressed to full body shivers and finally to a shaking so bad she'd have sworn it was a tremor. Then came the tears, and a cry of sorrow the likes of which she'd never uttered, not even when she lost her father.

She'd been in shock when he had died as she sat there in the hospital listening to the doctors and nurses trying to offer solace and explain that there had been nothing they could do.

Anger had flooded her because she'd known something was wrong with his death but never been able to figure out what.

Fear had been close behind because she was now alone with a mother who didn't approve of her or understand her and no one else in the world. Determination had been forged from those two emotions. Determination to keep his memory alive, and to provide for herself and her mother.

That determination had seen her through her rape, and had kept her going when her mother publicly denounced her saying no daughter of hers could have killed those men and that as far as she knew or cared Erillia had died of the injuries inflicted.

It had kept her going when she had finally confronted her mother, only to have her mother throw her out of the house spouting nonsense about how she should have found a way to survive without killing those men and that there were worse things in this life than being raped.

She'd scoffed when her mother told her she was no longer welcome in their family home, and had tried to convince Erillia it was for her own good. Determination born of anger and fear had seen her through it all.

It had even seen her through her contract against Bicormish and her subsequent training with Ren. But once Ren had caught her that last fateful day of their bet that determination had started to waver. It wasn't much at first, indeed it had been so insignificant she'd missed it at the time. It hadn't been until that incident with the Lynx that she'd realized just how unsettled she was now that her determination was undermined.

She'd thrown herself at Ren physically in both the fight and the sex later that night to escape thinking about why she'd changed.

It had worked for a little over half a day until Ren had unsettled her again telling her they needed to go into town. Changing the plan up had thrown her, and even then before she'd fully realized what she felt she'd known something was wrong. Now here she was, finally forced to come to terms with just why her defenses were crumbling.

She'd cocooned herself in anger, fear, and distrust. A tripod of emotions that no one could knock down on top of which she built her determination and sense of self. It had stood against all comers until Ren. Somehow he'd stripped her defenses, earning her grudging respect and trust in that wild hair brained escape over the wall. He'd wormed his way through those guardians she'd sat to keep her heart and emotions safe and blown her defenses wide open from the inside out.

He'd forced the gates open to feelings and longings she didn't know she had. Things she'd buried so deep she forgot they even existed. Now she lay on his chest as his cock slowly slipped out of her, shaking and sobbing like she'd never done before. Sorrow, the monster she thought she'd killed and buried after her father's death and her rape had her in its grip. It swamped her now with the force of a hurricane and the weight of the years she'd held it at bay.

She'd cried until there were no tears left and then lay shuddering on Ren's chest as she felt the last of his cum run from her holes while the last of her energy drained out of her as well. Sleep had claimed her, but only for a time.

She'd woke thinking she'd pull herself together and figure out where to go from where she now found herself. Instead sorrow had found her again pinning her to the bed as she discovered she'd replenished her tears while she slept.

She reached for her arrogance, but it was gone. She grasped at the tattered remains of her pride but they ripped asunder in her hands. Determination was dead from the start. Love, that emotion she thought she'd never feel unless it was for her child, sat on the shore and watched her drown. Fear and sorrow were all she had left.

In the swirling maelstrom of emotion crashing through her she was defenseless. And yet one word, her name, kept echoing through her mind. As she sobbed her eyes roved the cabin as she searched frantically for something, anything to focus her mind and relieve the crushing weight of emotions now resting on her. Finally, they rested on her bow for a second and a memory sprang unbidden to her mind.

"Who are you?"

The rich tones of her father's voice echoed in her ears. She was ten years old, staring at a small bow he'd just showed her how to make that was now thrown on the ground. A light quiver slung over her shoulder as she stared down at her clenched hands.

She'd been unable to control the arrow and it had gone wide. After about five attempts to hit the tree her dad had her aiming for she'd thrown down the bow in disgust.

Her father hadn't reacted with anger or sympathy. He'd merely walked off and retrieved the arrow, leaving her there with her arms crossed over her chest in a most decided huff. When he'd returned he handed her the arrow and sat on a stump in front of her. She saw him run his fingers through his hair and purse his lips in thought.

Something about his demeanor had told her that whatever he was going to say was important so she'd uncrossed her arms and stood there looking back at him and waiting. When he'd finally spoken it had been that simple question.

"Who are you?" At first she was taken aback, expecting him to continue with a chastisement about not being his daughter or some such for the way she was acting, but when he didn't go on she'd realized he was actually waiting for her to answer.

"I'm Erillia!" She'd said hotly. The answer was obvious and she couldn't see where he was going with this.

"What does that mean?" The question stunned her. She opened her mouth then closed it again. Finally, she looked at him.

"It means I'm me. What else would it mean. It's my name, that's who I am. What else could it mean!" He'd smiled at her frustrated answer.

"I'll tell you, but after I do I want you to think for a bit and then answer my question again. Ok?" He waited for her to nod agreement then smiled and ruffled her hair.

"Alright, so to answer that question myself I would say something like this. I am Edward, I'm dependable, skilled in tracking and hunting, honest, hardworking, I do what I say I will, and I'll do anything for you and your mother. Do you see the difference Erillia? A name isn't just a simple word. It's a word that people will learn to associate with all the things that make up who you are. So you have to decide for yourself what things people will think of when they think of your name."

She'd sat there for a moment thinking. Finally, she'd turned around and picked up the bow. Without meeting her father's eyes she'd dusted it off and checked to make sure it wasn't damaged. Taking the arrow he'd handed back to her she nocked it and drew to full. Sighting down the arrow she blew out her breath and let it fly. It flew wide to the left of the tree.

She sighed.

Setting the bow down carefully she scampered off and retrieved the arrow she'd just missed with. Running back she handed it to her father and looked into his eyes.

"I'm Erillia," she said shyly. "I finish what I start. Can you show me what I'm doing wrong dad? I'm sorry I got mad earlier. I want to be able to do everything you can, and I promise I'll keep trying until I get whatever you want to teach me right." She smiled as she remembered her father's deep laugh as he'd settled in and shown her how to adjust her aim for range and sight accurately.

It had taken most of the day, but she had stuck with it until she was able consistently hit the tree.

Years later she'd never lost that conviction to finish what she started and to always strive to live up to the example of her father. Over the years she'd added to her perception of herself and how she wanted others to see her but the two things she'd learned about herself that day had always remained at her core. She smiled slightly if sadly to herself as she sat up and moved off of Ren. Sliding from bed she stretched and grabbed her towel.

It was still early with the sunrise just starting to lighten the horizon leading her to suspect it was round 0630. A quick rinse off in the river refreshed her, and she stood basking in the coming sunrise as she finished drying her hair. Straightening up she saw her reflection in the surface of the flowing water. The slight tinge of red in her eyes caused her gaze to harden.

"I am Erillia, and I finish what I start," she said softly. "We haven't finished whatever this is that we have going Ren. If you think you get to just skip off you're wrong. My father was a fighter, and his blood and spirit runs strong in me. It won't be that easy to rid yourself of me."

Turning she strode back to the house. He might be trying to avoid a fight and fade away like a shadow but Ren had another thing coming. He'd trained her for long enough now that she was confident she could predict his plan. Time to shake him up and push him off script.

She might not be able to change Ren's mind about what he needed to do, and he clearly thought he needed to leave her. Still, if she couldn't change his mind she could at least put herself in a position to prevent him from doing what he wanted to do.

If she had to follow him to the edge of the universe she'd do it. Walking in the door she saw Ren was still deep in sleep. For the first time she could remember a frown marred his face even in sleep. She quickly dressed and then sat for a moment watching Ren sleep and wondering what her next move should be.

Finally, she glanced at his pack and noticed a tablet laying out on top of it. She had a vague recollection of Ren fiddling with the thing the day before not long before he'd pulled her to bed.

Moving over to the bag she scooped up the device. For a moment she struggled with the fact that she was going to be invading Ren's privacy. After the seconds pause she shook her head. Privacy be damned! If he was going to make these kinds of decisions she was going to do what she needed to do to figure out what his plans were.

Biting her lip, she tapped at the tablet hoping she could somehow crack whatever password he'd placed on it. To her surprise it popped up with a simple fingerprint scan. She glanced at Ren and chewed her lip for a second. Quietly slipping over to the bed she carefully slipped his hand out of the cover and gently teased a finger away from the others. Softly pressing the finger to the screen she held her breath and watched his face until she heard a soft beep.

Glancing back, she saw that the tablet had unlocked. Smiling triumphantly, she carefully laid his hand back on his chest and stepped softly away from the bed.

Taping the screen, she pulled up the recently accessed files. To her surprise, other than the map programs and data he'd been pulling up for their training, only two other files had been recently accessed. Pulling them up she found the first to be a list of items they needed divided up for each of them to purchase a portion of the items. She frowned as she noticed that by far Ren had assigned her the lions share of the shopping.

At first, it didn't make sense that she'd be doing more of the shopping than Ren, after all as the more experienced with avoiding attention and subterfuge he'd be the one best suited to visiting multiple shops without being noticed.

Granted she was more acquainted with many of these shop owners, they were all in the outskirts for the most part, but still it didn't make sense. Then she looked at the second file and her blood ran cold.

The second file was a list of ships scheduled for outbound travel today. Their destinations were different. Some to earth others to colonies she'd never heard of. The only thing they had in common was they were all leaving Terra today. Prices for tickets and applications for passage or work on the ships were tagged to each entry. She nearly collapsed to the floor as her hands started to shake and her legs went weak.

With shaking hands, she scrolled through the list as her guts twisted and her mind went numb. There were over twenty ships on the list and Ren had investigated each one. Tapping the links she saw he'd reserved tickets on all the passenger transports and had applied and been accepted as a deck hand on all of them.

Various aliases were assigned to each ship indicating who the ticket would be for if it was picked up.

The one that finally caught her eye was a PMC ship outbound on contract to a colony for pirate suppression. Unlike the rest of the ones on the list this ship was slated for rapid clearance, meaning that they could go to cruising speed as soon as they cleared atmo and were prioritized for out bound jump.

They'd be out of system in minutes after they released the clamps rather than the hours needed for the transports to spin up and gain clearance to jump.

The other part that caught her eye was that Ren had not applied as a deck hand. He'd applied as a boarding and strategical specialist. His job title was if he took the post would be battlefield control and incursion team lead.

She frowned. Her gut told her this was the one that Ren would take but it was odd that he'd risk being trailed by going to a military focus. The last part that was startling was that most of the ships wouldn't be leaving until later in the day.

With the list that she would be given it she would be hard pressed to make it to the earliest departures, especially the PMC departure since it left shortly before 1300.

Ren on the other hand with his shorter list would have no difficulty getting to any of these ships. She choked back a sob as she realized that not only was Ren planning on leaving her but he was planning to ditch the system entirely. Finally, she took a shaky breath and set her jaw.

"It won't be that easy Ren, I won't let it be. You'll at least have to face me and tell me why," she said softly. It was at least 0730 by this time, but if she forwarded the list to her own com tablet she could get a head start.

If Ren woke up soon he might still be able to beat her to the ship but at the very least she'd be able to meet the ship at the dock and confront him. There was just enough time that she'd be able to make it to all but one ship before it undocked. She'd just have to hope he didn't pick the one ship she couldn't make it to.

Quickly she sent the information to her com, hearing the acknowledging beep from as the device received the download. Swiftly she set Ren's tablet down and grabbed her clothes. Quickly dressing she grabbed her bow and quiver and a deer skin she kept folded by the door, and strode out of the house.

Taking a deep breath as she faced towards town and tried to push down the confusion and anger running through her. Setting off at a brisk walk she pushed the pace and stretched her legs. It took her about an hour to reach town, but by the time she did she felt more settled and confident in her actions.

She smiled to herself as she realized that the timing was almost perfect. Shift change was at 0800 for the guards and after they did a quick check of the cameras she knew they were never vigilant especially in the poor districts.

The outskirt wall only had a few functioning cameras anyway and they didn't care if someone sneaked into, or out of, the outskirts.

Even after her kill and their escape it was unlikely after this amount of time that they would be watching heavily. The deer skin she had she kept to wrap her bow and quiver in if she was going out in the rain.

This time though if she wrapped it around the quiver she could climb the wall with no one realizing it was actually a weapon she was carrying over. Anyone who saw her on camera or in person would assume it was just a rolled skin some hunter or other had sent in with his daughter to sell.