Morning comes too early as it usually does for me. I open my bleary eyes to find Tara staring at me with brilliant, golden eyes. Not her normal hazel eye color, but a bright, metallic 24k gleam. Whoa!
"Your eyes...," I begin.
Tara blurts at the same time, "Good morning sleepy-head."
We laugh. By the time I yawn and wipe the sleep from my gummy, chocolate brown orbs, Tara's eyes are again their normal hazel color.
I know what I saw. Her eyes were gold, with all the flashing metallic glints of sunlight on high end jewelry. There's more to our Tara than beauty and artistic talent!
Images swirl in my head, snippets of things my subconscious has noted. Things that have not yet made it to my waking mind. I'm distracted by a kiss before they can coalesce into a coherent thought.
"You ready for today?" Tara asks.
"Yeah," I say, "more than ready."
Today is the day I get my tattoo. Well, today is the day Tara will begin working on my tattoo. She's told me it will take three or four sessions to complete depending on how well I tolerate the inking process. I'm a little nervous, but my excitement outpaces my nerves by a mile. Tara says I'll be fine as long as I remember to stay relaxed.
She's says eating a good breakfast is the best start to the day so she'll be making us a batch of French toast and bacon. Last night we stayed at my house so Tara is working in an unfamiliar kitchen. It doesn't seem to bother her. She's already finished the bacon and now she's working on the last few slices of toast. She looks so cute bouncing around my kitchen in the Carolina Panthers jersey she is wearing as a nightgown.
Go Panthers!
"What are you thinking?" Tara asks as she sets a steaming plate of food in front of me.
"I'm thinking you look really hot in that jersey."
"Oh really? Last night you were annoyed that I wore this instead of coming to bed naked."
"That's true," I say. "You look great in the jersey. Still, I'd rather you were naked."
Tara lowers her head and her long, chocolate colored tresses form a curtain in front of her face, though they can't obscure the blush that runs into the collar of the jersey.
Tara says softly. "Looks change. They fade. I want to be liked for who I am on the inside, for what I do and what I believe."
"Who you are on the inside is all I care about. I saw your empathy the other night when I broke down in the bathroom. I've seen you with your friends, seen how they respond to you. You don't receive that kind of love without being a special type of person."
"You think so?"
I reply, "I know it, honey."
I can see by the look on her face, Tara is pleased with my answer. She looks at me, eyes bright, her wide smile showing her brilliant teeth in all their sharp, feral, glory. Tara opens her mouth to say something, something important or silly, something deep or wildly trivial. Whatever she is about to say is lost though, because what comes out of her mouth is, "Eat your breakfast before it gets cold." Shrugging, I pick up my fork and dig in.
"Are you comfortable?" Tara asks. "Make sure you're in a position you can hold for a while."
I'm laying across a table in Tara's shop, naked from the waist up and with my long, dirty blonde hair up in a bun. The table's height has been lowered so Tara has access to my back, shoulder and neck. The specialty bench next to me has been designed to fit under the table I'm on, leaving Tara's body flush against the table's edge. The ever perky Sydney is sitting behind Tara. Her curvy body is flush against Tara and her palms rest lightly on Tara's thighs. I pointedly look at Sydney's hands then raise my eyes to meet hers. Sydney's wink is telling; she knows I am annoyed. When she wraps her arms around Tara's waist and mouths to me 'I love this!' she is just being mean-spirited.
"Ready, Syd?" Tara asks.
"Yeah boss." Comes her reply. I don't see the satisfied smirk on Sydney's face as I've already closed my eyes, but I sure as hell hear it in her voice.
"Okay, sweetie," Tara says with a pat to my shoulder. "We're going to get started now. Just relax and let me work my magic.
The sound of the tattoo gun blends with the sounds of Tara and Sydney's soft voices. The two friends keep up a steady chatter as Tara works on my inking. There's pain, but less than I expected. Tara's left hand is firm and steady on my back while the right drifts smoothly over my taut skin. Mostly, I find myself drifting, thinking back to a childhood spent with my mother and sisters. I think about who I am, who I want to be. I spend a fair bit of my time thinking about Tara.
"Jennifer..." Tara's voice sounds very far away. "Jenn! Hey, Jenn. Earth to Jennifer."
"Uh-huh," I answer. I'm still drifting, drifting.
"We're going to take a break."
"Don't bother. I'm good to keep going."
Tap! There's a sharp rap on my unsuspecting bottom. "Hey, what's that for?" I ask.
Tara answers smartly, "You may be good, but Syd and I have been at it for almost four hours." She rubs my back lovingly. "We need to stretch our legs and grab something to eat."
"Four hours? Really? It doesn't feel like it's been that long."
Sydney chimes in, "I've never seen anyone have that much work done in one shot. It's almost like you were unconscious. And Tara, shit girl, I've never seen you work so fast! I could barely see your hand at one point."
Tara smiles at Sydney shyly. "Jennifer's the perfect subject."
"Tara," Sydney calls, "how about you run over to Shorty's and grab us some lunch? I'll keep Jennifer company and let her take a look at what you've finished."
Tara looks over at me; she is as aware as I that Sydney wants to be alone with me. Unsure of what it is Sydney could want I return her look letting her clearly see my uncertainty.
Sydney breaks the uncomfortable silence by speaking. "C'mon girls. I'm not going to do anything. I just want to have a little chat with Jennifer."
"Okay," I reply. "I guess that would be alright."
Tara looks at each of us in turn, still unsure if she should leave me alone. "Go ahead, Tara. I'll be fine."
"You sure?" she asks.
"Yes. Pick me up something good."
"Sure. Syd you want your usual?"
"Yes, thank you," Sydney replies.
We watch Tara head out the door, Sydney with quiet expectation and me with slight trepidation. When she is gone, Sydney turns to me with frank concentration. She stares at me for a good thirty seconds. Her look is neither menacing nor challenging, but it is appraising. I can't tell whether I pass the test or not, the look on Sydney's face reveals nothing of what's going on in the background. By now I'm sitting up on the table, one arm covering my naked chest, the other supporting me against the table top. Sydney ambles over to the table and takes a seat beside me.
"So Jennifer," Sydney begins. "I need to ask you a question. There's no right or wrong answer so I want you to be as honest in your answer as you can be. "
"I can do that," I reply.
"Good! Here we go: As far as your relationship with Tara goes, are you in it for the long haul, through sickness and health and all that fairytale stuff or are you just having fun?" I start to answer but I'm cut off. "Wait a sec. Like I said, your answer just determines how we spend the next few minutes. If you say you're just having fun, and that's totally ok, we can head to the back so you can see your ink. But...if this is a serious relationship we're going to need to have a quick, but fairly deep discussion."
She pauses and now it's my turn to appraise Sydney. Is there some ulterior motive behind this discussion? Is she trying to plant some seed of doubt in my mind that will later bloom into a relationship destroying weed? I study her, watching her face, her body language for clues of ill will or subterfuge. I've become a fair judge of character in my thirty-nine years and I put all of that experience to use. In the end, I don't sense anything amiss so I answer the question honestly.
"I've told Tara that she's kidnapped my heart and she's stuck with me until she gives it back. I mean it. I'm here until she tells me she doesn't want me around anymore."