Breaing the Rules

Not based on any particular gaming franchise or storyline. Sequel to Bending the Rules, although hopefully if you're familiar with RPGs you won't have too much trouble following along without having read that.

*****

"Oof. Can I help you?" Nuru said, struggling in vain, though less helpless than he'd ever been at her hands before.

"Yes, you can hold still. What the hell am I going to do with you?" Katlego said.

"Fuck my brains out? Let me go? I'm not sure why you're asking me, but that's my order of preference."

"It's rhetorical. I'm the best, Nuru, the best Nyala's Hand has. There are others who are higher level, but I have succeeded where they have failed. And yet here I am, chasing your lame ass out of the noob gate."

"I think you just can't bear to let a good-looking guy like me out of your sight."

"Why you stuck up... scruffy-looking... circle jerker!" She pulled the ropes even tighter, cutting painfully into his arms.

"Who's scruffy-looking?" he said, pointedly looking at her unkempt state.

"It's that fucking succubus of yours! She's left me some last compulsion that gets worse and worse!"

"Hey, you want me to Jill you off, just say so."

"That is nowhere near adequate at this point. I know the pattern now; I come to you and relieve it, but then it comes back, stronger than ever. She got me one more time before her death, and you've been in prison where I couldn't reach you; I've hardly slept in a week, dreaming of this moment. But now, it truly ends, and I'm making it worth my while."

She got his pants undone and started lashing them to his ankles.

"What - who dares-?" Katlego growled, looking up.

She vanished, calling upon her considerable skills as a thief class. It took him a minute to get just a few knots undone and pull his pants back up. The two figures approached slowly, giving him the dignity of a little extra time.

"Need a hand?" Dayo said.

"I think I'm good," Nuru said, slowly pulling it all loose.

"You sure about that? Looks to me like you got nabbed, literally right out of the gate," Ace said, corners of his mouth turned up.

"Laugh if you want. Everything was fine. Should have let me get my rocks off."

"If you say so, bro. Had no idea what we were walking into here."

"I reserve the right to be grumpy. What are you two doing here, anyway?"

"Got to talking after you left. Had a question or three for you," Dayo said.

"Where'd you hear that thing you told me, about sticking thumbs in people's eyeballs?" Ace said.

"Oh, that. Silly thing to come running after me to ask; I've got a succubus, I already told you. It's how demons talk."

"Got- wait, still!?" Dayo said, eyes going wide.

"Heard it got death by demon hunter," Ace said, raising an eyebrow.

"Er, had. I had a succubus."

"Bluff check fail," Ace said.

"Well y'see- not quite death, exactly," Nuru said.

"And!? We're dying to know what happened," Ace said.

Distantly, Katlego cursed. "I knew it was too easy to kill!"

"Shit. I've already said too much," Nuru said. "Anyway, question answered, don't let me hold up your day."

"Hurry up and get untangled so we can move on then," Dayo said.

"What, we're traveling together?" Nuru said.

"Aren't we?" Ace said. "I took a bath earlier, I shouldn't smell too bad."

"I've just been cock blocked again, so I'm kinda on the fence. Also, I figured you had better things to do, especially with the ghosts on my case, it's probably safe to say. I'm a dead man walking if the slightest thing goes wrong."

"Sorry to interrupt, but I think the mood's gone now. Anyway, I wouldn't miss your first foray out into the big world," Dayo said. "Plus, technically, I'm still courting you for my faction. No way we're leaving you alone now, with spurned women about. My boss would kill me. Maybe literally."

"You know I could take you all in my sleep," Katlego whispered, not far away.

"Shall we play a game of tag?" Ace said, drawing his bow, and vanishing.

"You're out of your league, boy."

"Then why are you still hiding?" Ace murmured quietly, from everywhere and nowhere.

"Let's get back to the road," Dayo said. "She could have traps anywhere out here."

"Gah!" Ace said, appearing suddenly, shaking his hand. A small line of blood showed on the back.

He bent over to grab the arrow he'd dropped, and a tiny pebble flew from his other hand as he did so. Katlego hissed, appearing and then vanishing again in the path the rock had flown.

Dayo conjured a glowing purple falcon, and pointed it that direction. "You wanna play with fire?" the valkyrie said quietly, menacing.

"A necromancer too? You travel in strange circles, young bard. This isn't over..." Katlego whispered more distantly.

"Don't leave! We can still-" Nuru pleaded.

A bow twanged quietly, and Tusa snarled. The angry lyena entered a noisy frenzy, hiding any movement she might have made.

"Dammit," Nuru said.

Ace appeared, put his bow away, sighing. "She's good, I'll give her that."

"Remind me again why you were going to run off without us?" Dayo said. "To say nothing of coming back to face those Rules Lawyers all by your lonesome."

"Don't you say a word," Nuru said, pointing a finger at the thief known only as Ace.

"Hey, I'm not taking any risks that might blow up my latest success. I've been working a long time for this," Ace said.

"Just so we're clear," Nuru said. "Anyway, I had some help getting here, besides you two, and I figured it was the least I could do to repay the favor. Goodness knows why they'd want me poking the bear when it's already angry, but I guess you can afford to if you're able to help out a pitiful little Level Four make his grand debut on the World Map without joining a faction like he's supposed to. Actually, Ace, I think you could help me out the most by going back and making sure nothing's blown up too badly for our mutual friend."

"I think... they're capable of taking care of themselves more than you are," Ace said, giving Nuru a half-lidded stare.

"Really? You guys are going to talk about me like I'm not here now? What's that all about?" Dayo said.

"What? No, not you!" Nuru said.

Ace looked back and forth between Dayo and Nuru in confusion.

"Oh. You said 'they'. I thought..." Dayo blush in embarrassment.

"Pronouns are hard," Nuru said, putting his face in his hands. He turned to Ace. "Dayo does not go by 'she'. Dayo goes by 'they' and 'them', and this is not the first time it's been confusing."

"I see," Ace said, whose face said he was clearly lying.

"As that woman said, whoever the heck that was, I'm a necromancer," Dayo said. "The undead tend not to show gender characteristics, and uh..."

"...Dayo decided to join the ranks of those whom you stereotype at your own risk," Nuru finished.

"You know what? I actually understand that. 'Ace' is short for 'asexual.' I kinda get where you're coming from."

"I'll be damned. Valkyrie, Tumelo's Chosen, at your service," Dayo said.

"Thief. Masters of D'shemil. A pleasure," Ace said, shaking hands.

"Gods help us, a thief is the High Faction hero in our party. We're a bar brawl just waiting to happen," Dayo said.

"You say that like it's a bad thing," Ace said.

"I mean- uh-" Dayo stammered.

"Tag, I win," Ace chuckled, slapping Nuru on the shoulder.

"Hey! Wasn't the race called off due to-" Dayo protested.

"If you assumed so, that's not my fault. Turnabout is fair play after your little melting earth stunt at the beginning."

"Touche. Fucker."

"You take that back! I am not a fucker!" Ace insisted, slapping at Dayo with no chance of hitting. "Ahem. So how far do you take this pronoun thing? Are you laying waste to everything within a square kilo if I slip and call you a beautiful woman accidentally?"

"Try it. See what happens," Dayo deadpanned, pulling the witch hat down to cover their eyes.

"That's not an impending explosion, that's a blush," Nuru whispered loudly enough that everyone knew Dayo couldn't have failed to hear it.

"Nuru, don't make me turn you into a meat puppet," Dayo warned.

"Why not? Sounded like fun to me," Nuru teased. "Besides, I still need to let out a little pressure."

"I never said you'd get off as a meat puppet," Dayo reminded him. "I might use you for my pleasure and just leave you hanging. Literally."

"Fine, I'll go back and check on our other friend," Ace said. "You two get a room and I'll catch up to you later."

"Bye!" Nuru said. "Dayo, did Mesi say she'd mind if-"

"That was a joke," Ace put in. "You're not getting rid of me that easy, you suicidal maniac. Who's Mesi?"

"My partner. Slash roommate. Slash lover," Dayo said.

"Figures a necromancer would love slashing," Ace quipped. "Ooh, she's that server at Baako's inn, isn't she? She's to die for, if I was into such things. I mean, uh... damn, no wonder there's a betting pool out on her, that explains so much. I won't say anything though. More fun this way. And profitable."

"A pool?" Dayo said. "They're actually taking bets on it? What's the pot at?"

"Oh no, can't let you in on it, you're directly involved. That would ruin everything," Ace said. "I might need to go double my own bet now though."

"I want half your winnings," Dayo said. "In exchange, I'll arrange any subtle clues to emerge you think will stir up the pool."

"Done," Ace said, shaking hands again.

"So, do you know where you're going, or are you just aimlessly wandering?" Dayo said.

"Uh, now that you mention it," Nuru said. "Which way's the nearest town? I didn't really spend too much time worried about my next move, since it was going to be so difficult just getting out the gate."

"Way Station is straight up the road, and right at the fork," Ace said. "Be nice Dayo, it's his first time."

"It's a tough world out here. Better be ready," Dayo said, elbowing Nuru in the ribs.

Ace sighed. "You're not wrong."

*****

"This is it? Really?" Nuru said.

"What's the matter?" Ace said.

"Same plain houses? Same cobblestone roads? I'm disappointed," Nuru said.

"Didn't want the fresh blood getting homesick and going back with a bad case of nerves when they built this place," Ace said. "Don't worry, there's lots of dwarven undergrounds and minotaur trails and all that not too far from here."

A page came thundering down the road on a light sprinter horse.

"I seek the one named Nuru!" he called out. "Have you seen him?"

"That's me," Nuru said.

"I have a message. Your friend is in urgent trouble. You're to go to the library at once and see her. That is all. Hyah!"

He thundered back the way he came.

"Well come on, which way to the library?" Nuru said.

"Say, Ace..." Dayo said.

"What?"

"You used a smoke portal to get Nuru out. What's to stop the ghosts from sending a thief with a smoke portal to toss him back in?"

Ace blinked. "Nuru, you might want to consider getting cursed. Also, the library is a trap."

"Come again?!" Nuru said. "A curse? My life is hard enough as it is!"

"It'll be harder if you get a Bolt from the Blue. Not even Resurrection can save you then. Don't forget, you can't just stand on the inside of the multiversal pathway, the moment you cross the Gate threshold in that other space you'll be done."

"What does that have to do with curses?"

"So, there's three kinds of curse, as I'm sure you know. The first kind gets applied directly to you, anthropomorphism, vampirism, that kind of thing. The second kind is a trap, equipment that looks good, but once you put it on it has some kind of negative enchantment, debuff usually. Most commonly it also attaches securely and cannot be removed without the aid of an archon or priest. The third kind is a challenge, a self-imposed handicap; the idea is it's a temporary pact with the gods to prove yourself worthy of favor, and is applied to equipment that you use. You can take off the equipment, but it resets the counter, sometimes increasing it. Once the counter runs down-"

"It turns from a curse into a blessing, I know," Nuru said. "So?"

"So, of the second kind, one of the curses is Frequency Pinning. If you get stuck with it, you're completely unable to use Smoke Portals, pocket dimensions, any of it. For most people, that's a significant inconvenience. For you..."

"It's a benefit. Kind of. What happens if I need to use a Smoke Portal though?" Nuru said.

"Well, you'd have to lift the curse. You can pay a good bit of money at a temple, or you can use the chain method," Dayo said.

"Chain method. Remind me what that is?" Nuru said. "I think I slept through class that day."

"It's where you use a curse of the third type and you link the curses. Once the challenge is met, the pact curse will expire and they will both turn into blessings," Ace said.

"Provided I survive long enough to satisfy the challenge, while under the influence of two curses," Nuru said.

"Well, obviously."

"So, they intentionally leave these lying around for unsuspecting fools to pick up, but they don't label them, right?" Nuru said.

"Generally not," Ace said. "However, temples do identify and disenchant them, and they've usually got a good collection going."

"I'm not exactly the most welcome in temples just now," Nuru said.

"I'd spin it as penitence, if I were you," Dayo said.

"What- ooh, that's a good one," Ace said. "Make a token of contrition and show your 'guilt' about something and they'll be happy to let you curse yourself."

"And, you know, if you've got any actual bad feelings about what happened, you can ease your conscience," Dayo put in.

"As if he's got one of those," Ace said, waving his hand dismissively. "He's a man-whore, you know how they are."

"Actually, I kinda do have one. I think I got Father Emeka in trouble back there, and he was nothing but kind to me," Nuru said. "Saved my life, in fact."

"Well, that's your business," Ace said. "Sure, it might work for your conscience too, if you ignore the selfish angle that started this conversation."

"This town up here's got a temple, right? Sooner I get this done, the better."

"According to my map, it does."

"Right. Hold my drum for me, will you?" Nuru said to Dayo. "It's a little distinctive just now."

"I'll take that. I can pretend to be you and see what happens at the library," Ace said. He turned to Dayo and said, "You'd probably better not come. It's nothing personal, I just don't want to be the one to bust any secret identities."

"Dayo, stay here, we'll be back," Nuru said.

"Sure," Dayo said, finding themselves suddenly alone. "I'll just stand here fretting, don't mind me."

*****

"Hello Father."

"Oh, I'm not entitled to be called Father yet, I'm just an acolyte. What can I do for you?"

"I wish to make amends... for, uh, a friend of mine. He has offended the gods, and is wracked with guilt about it, and refuses to come out of his house."

"Will you take a Faction quest in his name, then?"

"I would make a sacrifice of a different sort. You have items which are cursed, perhaps?"

"We do. Are you taking an oath, then?"

"No. I'm afraid only a proper curse will do. My friend's name is Nuru."

"Oh. THAT guy. Yeah, he's not allowed in here."

"I know. Which is why I, Abioye, am here in his place. I believe I can talk him into getting back on the quest line, but I need some leverage. If he knows I've got a curse on me because of him, he'll feel obligated to help."

"You're a true friend, he doesn't deserve you. But if you're that devoted to his redemption, I will honor your loyalty. What kind of curse can you bear to take on?"

"What are my options?"

"Let's see, I haven't examined them in a little while. Are you willing to accept an armor piece? We usually uncurse and dispose of those since they take up a lot of room."

"Hmm, if it's going to be stuck to me I think that would be quite burdensome. Have you got a ring?"

"We've got rings like you wouldn't believe. Easy to store, you know. Come, let's have a look. Most common are STR debuffs, to discourage intruders from being able to carry as much loot with them. Never trust a ring you find lying around in a dungeon."

They passed into an antechamber with a bunch of unlocked chests.

"Not afraid of them being stolen?" Nuru said.

"Not so much. They're usually considered to be of negative value," the acolyte said.

"I suppose that's true."

They rummaged for hours, comparing specs. Minor poison effect. Debuff to bleeding resistance. Increased flatulence. Boils. DEX penalty.

"Geez. Who makes all this stuff? This is like, big business out there for somebody."

"Home defense is strategically important for any adventurer with an estate. Don't want to go collecting all this great loot just to have some Low Factioner break in and take it all while you're out questing. Cursed equipment is a pretty popular deterrent, and I'm sorry to say, a lot of griefers out there will gift such equipment to rivals and enemies."

"Rude. You know, I'm not really feeling any of these, to be honest," Nuru said.

"We do have the special collection. I hate to suggest it, but..."

"Why?"

"Well, they're considered especially pernicious. We lock those up so that somebody doesn't get themselves majorly nerfed by an ordinary prankster. We go through them and uncurse those first, after the armor pieces. Only so much holy power to go around though, and adventurers need blessings more than equipment does."

"Sure. Well, show me those, why don't you?"

They went down the hall to a door with ten locks on it, and a reinforced frame. A number of small boxes lined the shelves, with tags on them.

"Say, does this one say 'frequency pinning'?" Nuru asked.

"Let me see. Yes, that's right."

"What's that about?"

"Well, see, we're in this... multiverse or something. Places can occupy the same space or whatever. Consult a travel agent, I'm not an expert. But basically, spaces occupy the same space by vibrating at different frequencies. Frequency pinning basically holds you tight to one frequency, and you'd better hope to the gods that it's this one or you'll be stuck in whatever tiny little dimension you're in. As it is, you won't be able to do any sort of fast travel, by Smoke Portal or multraversal or whatever the heck it's called."

"Multraversal?"

"Multiversal travel. Travel agents can tell you. Go to the library, I really can't explain it any better, sorry. I just know it's one of those things we all take for granted these days."

"Oh. You know, my friend could probably use an excuse to chew on what he's done. If I take that curse, he'll have to travel with me the slow way, and I can talk him out of these crazy ideas he's got. I mean, at the very least we'll have to take our mounts, right?"

"I follow you. Yeah, that might be a good idea. Don't forget this is permanent though; if you don't convince him to help lift the curse in gratitude, you'll have to pay to lift the curse yourself, and you'll be hampered by having to take the long way everywhere. Questing is going to be such a chore to get the money together for an uncursing. That's why this thing is locked up, it's really awful. Doesn't sound like much, until you really need to get somewhere fast, or go to some quest giver's pocket universe to turn a quest in, and then you're in trouble."

They examined a bunch of others, but nothing else had that particular curse effect.

"Alright, I'll take it."

"You're sure? I can't reverse this if you change your mind - you'll have to pay to get it uncursed like anyone else."

"I'm sure. Here, I'll put it on immediately."

"You're a brave soul. Let me know if you need help with that, I can set you up with a challenge curse to chain to it."

"Oh yeah, I might just do that. Let me talk to my friend first though, and see what happens."

"Good luck, man."