Chapter 12 - Freedom
Taking Genie's previous suggestion, George asked to be turned into a housefly, the strangest feeling transformation yet, and zipped undetected through the halls toward the dragon who'd taken Piper's tablet. The building was on high alert, and every available body was scrambling to find them. Meanwhile, the five that were trapped in the cell were still there. George hoped there wasn't a spare key within easy reach. But Charlie still had his radio, and George could hear him barking orders when he flew by. Piper had found a hiding spot under the stage in the court and seemed secure enough for the moment, which left George and the genie time to complete their part of the quest.
And all the while, he couldn't get over how much she looked like the Genie. Or, more accurately, how much the Genie resembled a porned-up version of Piper. The most significant difference was in their body proportions, which his companion pushed to the limit. And then there was their hair. Where Piper's was a deep velvety red with shocks of gold streaming through it, the Genie had light brown hair, like shiny polished bronze.
"Genie, she looks just like you," he remarked.
"I noticed. It's probably not a coincidence."
He zoomed over the heads of a confused goon who looked like he might be buzzed or high. "But she didn't look like that before."
"And yesterday, you thought bread tasted like dirt. Remember, the curse altered your perception. Good things were bad, and bad things were worse. As to why I look like her, I'm essentially an amalgamation of all the best qualities you admire in others. From my body down to my soul, whatever is most pleasing, harmonious, or beneficial to you."
"So you're saying you look like her because it's what I like?"
"Exactly. And might I say, you have excellent taste."
"You would say that," he joked.
George finally arrived at the infirmary and squeezed through the space under the door. The lights were off, but even though the sun was low, there was still enough natural light to see. The air was thick with heavy clouds of something laced with THC. Two men were lying on examination tables. One was passed out, snoring loudly with a pile of empty beer cans and a bottle of pills tipped over on the floor. The other was taking long drags of his weed pen and scrolling on Piper's tablet.
The Genie said, "There's our man."
"These guys are really messed up. Piper must've gone full anime."
"I keep hearing that term. What is anime?" she asked innocently.
Being pressed for time, George condensed his definition into something he knew she would understand immediately. "It's like hentai, but without the tentacles. For now, just know that you never go full anime unless you mean it."
"If it means multiple broken ribs, head trauma, and a dislocated knee, anime sounds awesome!"
"He looks pretty out of it. Maybe I could pass for one of them and confiscate it without drawing attention." George summoned his best football captain impression and became a perfect replica of Charlie Plumber. Then, he opened the door and closed it again, pretending that he just entered the room.
The sleeper stayed asleep, but the other said, "Hey, yo, Cap, this shit is great."
George puffed out his chest. "Yeah, only the best for my crew. How's your knee?"
"Oh, I dunno, I am flyin' right now. But hey, was I trippin'? Did the girl break out again?"
"Pfft, where did you hear that?"
"I thought I heard you talkin' on the radio. Bruh, don't let her find me. I can't take this shit." The man was clearly intoxicated, but his fear of Piper seemed genuine.
"Relax, she's secure," said George in a firm yet reassuring tone he imagined Charlie would adopt. However, comforting any of Piper's kidnappers felt gross, and he wanted to get out of there quickly. "I am gonna need her tablet."
"Aww, man, Cap, why, though? The wi-fi ain't workin' anyway. I got like zero bars, dude. Like, zero."
Thinking quickly, George said, "We think she may have put a curse on it. Anyone who uses it to look up porn, their balls fall off in three days unless they give the tablet to someone else."
His face contorted in panic. "No way! Really?" Then, he shoved the tablet at George. "Bruh, take it! Take it!" George snatched it eagerly.
"Well, that was easy," said Genie.
"How does the expression go? Like stealing candy from a weed-addled jock who's high on painkillers."
Suddenly, Charlie's voice came through on the radio sitting on the nightstand at the other side of the bed from George. "I want a status update! Someone tell me they've eyes on the girl!"
George and the patient locked eyes as understanding swept over his zonked affectation.
"Uh-oh," said the Genie.
They both reached for the radio simultaneously, but the goon was closer. "Bruh, Help! Infirmary..." he managed to get out before George could get a hand over his mouth.
Charlie replied, "Gordie, respond! Gordie!"
Meanwhile, George and Gordie struggled. Though he was high, Gordie managed to put up a decent fight. The dragon symbol on his bracer glowed faintly as he resisted George's efforts to subdue him.
Charlie continued, "Someone check the infirmary, now! And find my damn keys!"
Finally, George got the upper hand by placing Gordie in a sleeper hold. "Go to sleep, go to sleep, go to sleep..." he chanted, hoping he was doing it correctly. It had been years since his father taught him, and he was rusty. But it eventually worked, and Gordie went limp. Knowing he had only a few precious moments before the room was swarmed with Manticore, he pulled one of the empty beds over and wedged it against the door. Then he picked up a cabinet and stacked it on top.
"That'll hold them for a minute," he muttered.
"I can turn you into a fly again. We can slip out through that vent." She highlighted it in pink for him.
Multiple glowing guards were heading in his direction. Meanwhile, Charlie's voice came over the radio once more. "I'm warning you idiots again! Do not look directly at her! Do not let her say anything! And if one of you kills her, so help me, I'll murder you myself!"
"They think she's in here," he said to himself. "Genie, can you mimic Piper's voice?"
To answer him, Piper's voice rang through his mind, "Dummy! I hate that I love you so much!"
"It'll do," he said as he stacked more heavy objects in front of the door.
Someone on the other side tried the handle, and when the door didn't budge, they began throwing their shoulder against it. It was holding, but there was no telling for how long. "I want you to pretend to be Piper. Make her sound really threatening. Make them scared to get too close. Keep them busy for as long as you can. I'll return the book to Piper, and we'll see about her spell."
"Ooh, roleplay! I'm so ready for this!"
And then, a carbon copy of Piper appeared before him in a puff of pink smoke. "Take my spellbook, and don't you dare go looking for nudes," she winked. "Ooh, before you go, take his bracer. We'll need one for Piper so she can get through the shroud."
"Good thinking." He yanked it off of Gordie's arm while checking his pulse. He was still alive but out cold. Meanwhile, the sleeper hadn't stopped snoring since George entered the room. George remarked, "I figured you'd just make another one like you did for me."
"I can only do stuff like that for you. Read the manual, ya goofball."
"Open up, bitch!" shouted someone from outside, followed by another crash against the door. "We know you're in there! There's no way out!"
George took that as his cue to leave. But before turning him back into a fly, the Genie masquerading as Piper gave him a quick smooch.
"Was that for luck?" he asked.
She grinned. "With me, you don't need luck. Now shoo, little fly." She transformed him, then blew him toward the vent. As he entered, he heard Piper's voice. "I'm in here, needle-dicks! Come any closer, and I'll turn Gordie's nuts into actual nuts!"
George hurried through the vents toward Piper's silhouette. It was harder to do than he thought it might be. In stealth video games, designers would allow the player to crawl through vents to hide or take shortcuts, but George learned quickly that actual ventilation systems, especially ones as old and ignored as the Filmore's, are dark, dirty, and cramped. Being a fly made it possible, but George also learned that flies have terrible vision for navigating a dark network of tunnels while under a time crunch. Instead, he found an exit the first chance he got and continued buzzing through the well-lit corridors.
Charlie and the rest were still stuck in the cell when George reached the stage. Piper was underneath, blocked from view by a decorative purple curtain. So, he slipped between the folds and landed on her shoulder. "Okay, Genie, change me back, please." He immediately grew back to his original form, and Piper jumped in fright at his sudden appearance.
"Gah!" she yelped.
"Shh! Sorry, it's just me. I've got your spellbook."
Piper clutched her chest and said, "Christ, George, you scared the poop out of me." She took the tablet from him and hugged it close to her chest, "Oh, how I missed you, old friend. I'll never complain about bad wi-fi ever again." Then, she swiped on the screen in a precise, well-practiced swooping motion, bringing the device to life. "Assholes," she spat.
"What's wrong?" he asked.