Chapter 8
Truth and Consequences
Inclon jerked awake at the touch to his shoulder. "Master," Justilia whispered. "You should go to bed, Master. Your back will give you no end of grief if you sleep at your desk again."
The sage looked up at Justilia's tense face. He knew what she was worried about. Inclon wasn't young anymore and his bones and muscles were prone to pain when he didn't take care of himself. Wearily, he looked at the notes he'd been working on last night and sighed when he realized he couldn't remember just what he'd last been working on.
"You're right, Justilia. I can't even remember where I left off. Bring me a cup of Melrose and then you can help me relax. While I'm sleeping, would you find out how Amber's doing in her training?"
"Of course, Master. I'll be right back."
*****
When Amber woke up, she didn't feel rested at all. The dream stuck in her memory, haunting her with what she'd been doing for the last month. With each lie, Amber found it harder to go on. With each lie, it seemed as if Bressala struggled even more to believe it. Her ability to feign enjoyment for her training was stretched to the limit. While there were aspects she enjoyed, or would have if not for the constant knowledge that she was keeping secrets, more and more of the training went past what the brothel wanted. Each time that happened, she needed to be punished as part of her training to get over the conditioning that had been imposed on her in Ravenshore.
Amber went through her morning ablutions like a zombie; something that had become normal for her. Thebes and Yolanda tried to engage her in lighthearted banter, but failed to bring a smile to her face for yet another time. Once the morning meal was finished, Bressala announced a new subject for Amber's training.
"Amber, we're starting your orgasm training today."
"Orgasm training, Mistress? Don't orgasms come naturally?"
"They can, and we hope they come that way as often as possible. No, orgasm training is actually a combination of controlling when you cum and being able to cum when the pleasure you're getting is not enough, or totally absent."
"Like pain/pleasure symbiosis, Mistress?"
"Symbiosis training is the culmination of orgasm training. No, we start by teaching you to find pleasure enough to cum when your Master or Mistress isn't providing it, yet clearly expects you to. Thebes, Yolanda, show Amber what I mean."
Yolanda lay down on the sleeping pallet with her legs splayed. Instead of bringing his mouth or cock to bear, Thebes simply caressed her pussy and tits with very light strokes. Amber could see immediately that such touches were incapable of bringing Yolanda off. Incredibly, Yolanda started to writhe on the pallet, as if she was fast approaching her climax. Several minutes later, Yolanda gave a squeal as her body shook.
"She faked that very well," Amber thought to herself. "That shouldn't be too difficult."
"Okay, Amber. Lie down and we'll show you what you're up against."
Amber laid down and spread her legs. Yolanda got between Amber's lags and started licking around Amber's pussy, but never actually touching it. Amber could certainly see why this would be a problem. There was no way Amber would be able to cum. She waited a few minutes and started imitating how she thought she acted when her arousal was increasing.
"Amber, do you find this arousing?"
Amber's lie of, "Yes," left her mouth without even a thought. Yolanda looked up in shock and Bressala motioned her away from Amber.
"Amber! A slave never lies to her Master or Mistress. Just what were you thinking? It's clear you aren't aroused."
"Mistress? But...what...that's...I thought that's what I was supposed to do; convince a Master that I was enjoying him."
"No, you've missed the meaning of my words completely. We're not trying to train you to fake your Master. We're planning on showing you how to take such insufficient pleasuring and actually cum from it. The penalty for a slave lying in house Grantlo is a whipping; one on par with Carli's demonstration punishment. Slaves are entrusted with so much on Destran; they simply have to be above reproach."
"I'm sorry, Mistress. I didn't realize."
"What bothers me is that you just assumed that we wanted you to deceive. Amber, have you ever been lied to by another slave?"
"No, Mistress."
"Exactly! None would even think of it, especially about sex. Where did you get the idea that we wanted you to lie?"
"I don't..."
Amber broke down, unable to utter that same lie yet again. Her control lost, she broke down into deep, wracking sobs; crying in grief at the pain she'd suffered and brought to those around her. Bressala was right: no one from Destran had ever lied to her; from the venturer who first contacted her in the brothel in Ravenshore, to her trainer and fellow slaves. Bressala held her close, letting the tears flow; realizing what could be the only explanation for things.
"Amber, this isn't the first time you've lied to us, is it?" the trainer asked, once Amber's sobs had eased. Amber nodded, unable to force the words out. "What is it, dear? Why did you think you needed to lie; to hide the truth?"
"You'll...Garth will...I'll be killed if anyone finds out."
"I promise, Amber, no one's going to kill you. What is it? What are you hiding?"
"I
remember
."
The way she said the word made its meaning clear. It was hard to believe that the potion had indeed failed, but her memories might very well explain much of Amber's difficulty in training.
"How long have you had them?"
"Ever since I woke from my collaring. I dreamed of my past, and when I woke, I remembered."
"Is this why you're having so much trouble with your training?"
"Yeah, but it's not like you think. I was a slave then too, but it wasn't like here. They were cruel and we were worth nothing. I was trained by being beaten until I did it the right way."
"And we're trying to train you in different ways." Amber nodded. "That explains much. We have to tell Garth, Amber. You'll have to be punished as well."
"I know. I want to be. I've been so torn up inside with all the lies. I wish I'd never started them; that I'd just told the truth the first time."
"I know. Come. Let's go see Garth."
As Amber was led through the now familiar corridors, Bressala whispered instructions to her. "It'll be best if you tell him what you did wrong and ask to be punished."
"Mistress, I don't know if I can. I'm so scared."
Bressala stopped, grasping Amber by the shoulders. "I understand how frightened you must be. Being punished is never fun, and the punishment for lying is severe. But, how much of what you're feeling is guilt?"
Amber felt tears running down her cheeks. "A lot, Mistress. I'm so sorry."
"I know you are. Think on this. How will you feel if Garth tells you, 'that's okay, we know you're sorry.'?"
Amber stared, her mouth open. The very thought of being treated so lightly horrified her. She remembered how much she feared her father's punishment for misdeeds;
and
how much she was relieved when they were over. Once punished, it was forgotten and forgiven. The worst thing her mother could ever have done was to utter those dreaded words, "Wait until your father gets home." That statement condemned her to hours of guilt before that dreaded, cleansing punishment. The expression on her face answered Bressala's question.
"You see, you
need
to be punished, don't you?"
"Yes, Mistress. I understand. I'm still frightened though."
"Of course you are. I'd be shocked if you weren't. Amber, I know you're brave." She held up a hand to forestall Amber's denial. "Bravery isn't being unafraid. It's doing what you're afraid of when you have to. I know you're brave because you've overcome your fears of punishment to train successfully. You can do this. Are you ready?"
Amber nodded and the pair continued. Soon they were outside Garth's quarters. Bressala brushed the curtain and led Amber in after the command to enter was heard. Amber walked forward, trembling with every step. She sank to her knees and bowed her head.
Garth looked up at Bressala with a raised eyebrow. The trainer nodded towards Amber.
"Amber, what do you wish of me?"
"Master, pl...please...pun...punish me."
"What do you need to be punished for?"
"I've been lying, Master; for months."
Garth stared at Amber, his eyes wide. He knew immediately what Amber had lied about. It would explain much. "What, Amber, were the lies." His voice was soft and gentle, trying to reassure Amber.
"I...I remember, Master. I remember everything. I have since I woke in the collar."
He cupped Amber's chin in his hand, turning her face towards him. "Is this why you've had so much trouble with your training?"
"Yes, Master. I remember Ravenshore and the punishments there. They punished any deviation from the right methods. Bressala's training is in different methods and I keep remembering not to change."
"Why didn't you tell us what was happening?"
"I was afraid that you'd send me back or kill me."