Tetenia choked loudly on His Likeness, and her head shot off the phallus. She breathed heavily, quickly, deep, heaving, almost panicked breaths. She held her stomach and then rubbed her temples, gazing up at the life-size, golden statue of Him.
Ellesa, her Blessed Servant, handed her a glass of water. Tetenia took small sips, not wanting overwhelm herself. When Tetenia finally was able to speak she said "How long was that today? Fourteen hours? Fifteen? I don't think any I can do any more right now."
"Fourteen and a half hours, about," Ellesa replied. Tetenia took another sip of water, and Ellesa helped her up. Together, they walked out of the shrine and into the living room of Tetenia's living quarters. Tetenia sat down on the couch. Her back, knees and neck were achingly sore.
"Do you want something to eat?" Ellesa asked her.
Tetenia thought for a moment. "Maybe," she said. "You might as well bring over a plate." Ellesa walked off to the kitchen.
Months had passed. Every day, for fourteen, sometimes sixteen, hours a day (plus the hour for the actual Ceremony of Full Worship), Tetenia kneeled down before His Likeness, the Likeness's ten-inch golden phallus shoved down her throat. She had barely even seen His Supremacy since they day of her punishment. Once, He summoned her, and she went to Him, bowed down for a few hours, then was dismissed. Aside from that, she only saw Him from a great distance, on the Sacred Throne, during the handful of Changing of the Term ceremonies that had occurred since then.
Instead, Tetenia saw His Likeness. Every day, gagging, choking, sometimes vomiting in a bucket, head pounding, eyes watering, muscles sore. Nearly every day she considered going to Him to request absolvance of penance, but she refrained, remembering Ellesa's advice all those months ago: until she could get through an hour of Full Worship, absolvance was all for naught. And she couldn't get through an hour, she wasn't even remotely close. She wasn't even sure that she had made any progress at all.
Ellesa came back, and set a plate of fruit and cheese on the table in front of Tetenia. "Thanks, Ellesa," Tetenia said quietly. Ellesa sat down in a chair beside the table, as Tetenia nibbled at the food.
"Do you want some?" Tetenia asked, pushing the plate towards Ellesa.
"Are you sure?"
"Yeah." Ellesa took a piece of fruit.
Tetenia cracked her neck and rubbed her shoulders. "Can I ask you something?" she said to Ellesa.
"Sure, of course. Anything you want."
"How much penance do I owe now?"
Ellesa paused for a moment. "You know you still haven't completed your latest round of penance, right? And you don't need to know until then."
"I want to know."
"Are you going to ask Him for absolvance? You know...you're still really far from getting through an hour."
"I don't know if I'm going to ask Him. Maybe I will, and maybe I won't. I just want to know." Tetenia paused, and looked up at the ceiling. "I just want to know if I've made any progress at all."
"Do you feel like you have?"
"Not really."
"It comes on fast." Ellesa thought for a second. "Really fast. Like, you break through a wall, and suddenly, you can do it. But you don't know when it's going to happen. Sadly, you're not there yet."
"I just want to know what's a head of you."
"It might not even be ahead of you," Ellesa said, emphatically. "I'd advise against it."
Tetenia stared straight ahead, and ate a small piece of cheese. "I'm telling you to tell me. You're my servant. I want to know."
"OK," Ellesa replied, getting up. She returned with a small notebook, and thumbed through the pages for a minute or two. "You've committed 116,865 abrogations. If you perform 14 hours of penance per day, it's about 1,391 days, or 3 years, nine months, three weeks and one day on your knees." Ellesa looked at Tetenia sympathetically.
Tetenia stared straight ahead as Ellesa told her this. Nearly four years on her knees? And that's on top of the month or two she had left in this round, so it was really more like four. She knew there was a very good chance it would not happen, but it could. This was her life. Kneeling before a statue. Suffering - and not even for His Supremacy's pleasure, at least not directly.
Tetenia stood up suddenly. "I need to go out," she said.
***
Outside, daylight was waning into night. Though it was a pleasant evening, there was a very slight chill in the air, which Tetenia felt as she was - as she had to most of the time - wearing nothing but a two-piece set of silk and lace underwear. She walked through the leafy courtyard between the four buildings which house the His concubines, towards the shore of the lake. She turned when she got to the lake, and sat on a bench looking out at the water. She could still make out the contours of the buildings on the water: some of the Queen Priestesses' palaces, and His Sacred Palace, a vast hulk spanning the northern shore of the lake, far off to the left. Tetenia gazed at the water, the moonlight glimmering off the gentle waves. The slight chill was actually kind of refreshing, she thought. It was good to be out of her quarter, not on her knees.
This isn't exactly what she thought concubinage would be like. She didn't really have any conception of it, although she knew orally pleasuring His Supremacy would play a big role. But she didn't think it would be like this. She didn't think it would be such an enormous, almost incomprehensible, challenge.
But even more than that, she was lonely. She liked Ellesa, and Dacia, her other female Blessed Servant, but they barely had time to talk, and they were her servants, after all. (Her two male common servants kept a polite distance, which was probably for the best.) Some of the other concubines seemed friendly with each other, but Tetenia had no time to socialize, what with her days being totally devoted to choking on a golden phallus.
Tetenia missed Nordland. She had written her parents once, but she kept things vague; they responded quickly, but equally vaguely. She didn't particularly want to see anyone from home - certainly not now - and she didn't particularly want to go back. She just missed it. Everything seemed cold and distant now, despite perpetually pleasant weather. The other concubines she saw around the quarters, and around the Estate, looked happy and healthy. She figured their days of penance were over; she wondered when she'd get there. She hoped it would be soon. She hoped it would actually be.
Just then, someone tapped Tetenia on the shoulder, startling her. "Hi, Tetenia," she said with a smile. "How are you?"
It was Jyushka - one of the concubines who had accompanied His Supremacy to Nordland, what felt like a lifetime ago. They had seen each other around a couple of times since then, and always exchanged pleasantries, but had not really talked much.
"I'm OK. Good," Tetenia replied. She smiled sheepishly. "Sorry...you startled me."
"It's alright," Jyushka said. "Mind if I sit?"
"Not at all." Jyushka sat on the bench next to Tetenia.
"So you're doing well?" Jyushka asked. The early months of concubinage, Jyushka knew, were usually very difficult.
Tetenia was still gazing at the water. "I'm fine...I think." It was a nice view, or what was left of it with night falling.
Jyushka smiled at Tetenia. The two girls at staring out at the water in silence for a few minutes.
"Can I ask you a question, Jyushka?" Tetenia said.
"Sure."
"How much time did you spend...on your knees?"
Jyushka had a feeling this would come up. "A little over a year," she said.
Tetenia was taken aback. "That long?"
"Yes. I broke through, was able to do the hour, mostly, in a little under a year, but it took me a month or so to get absolvance. Once you know it'll matter, you go back every week or two until He says yes." Jyushka chuckled. "It was...I did get a little afraid I was displeasing Him, towards the end there."