A Pac of His Own (ch. 03)

Chapter Three

Despite the fact that it was just like any other party he'd gone to in his college career, there was something like the weight of expectations hanging over the head of this one. It was being held at Billy Sexton's house and that always meant it was going to be a raucous time, generally with a live band playing in the basement. It was the first weekend in December, and the month was already threatening to be a wild one, with the winter snows coming in hard, forcing everyone to bundle up thoroughly any time they went outside.

But Will knew, that was just the sort of excuse Billy Sexton needed to hold a party at his place, so it was almost guaranteed that April would turn up, Lacey assured him. Billy's parties were full of the exploits that nobody on campus wanted to miss.

The house was a massive three-story monster that housed at least half a dozen students in various stages of their college career, including Billy himself who referred to himself as a "twelfth-year senior," and nobody thought he was kidding any more. Billy was an institution around campus, with nobody entirely certain how he was funding his college adventures.

The bottom floor was almost entirely the "party area" with a bar set up as well as a stage where Billy liked to host local bands trying to get practice in with audiences to counteract them. Tonight's group was called Embrace The Lightning, and despite the emo-esque band name, it seemed like they were going to be sticking to playing a heavy rotation of Foo Fighters, Jimmy Eat World and Van Halen cover songs. Despite the fact that it was swelting hot down there and most people were sweating their lungs out, almost all of them were still wearing their parkas because in the one completely unbreakable rule of Billy's house was that smoking (

and

vaping) wasn't allowed within the structure itself. "Take that shit outside," Billy had said more than a couple of times. "And if you can't do that, then just get the fuck outta my house."

Will and Lacey had come into the mid floor, though, which was where people were partying when they wanted to be able to have a conversation and not be completely dwarfed by the sound of the band. The floors were surprisingly well insulated in terms of sound, so while it was clear that the band was making a ruckus downstairs with the audience all cheering and chanting out "PAN-A-MA!" during the chorus, it wasn't too loud to overwhelm even casual conversation.

Lacey had made sure she had played up as much as she could into what she thought April would expect to see her in, which meant the skirt was ungodly short, the top was ridiculously low cut, and as much of her flesh as she could put on display, she had. She'd bitched the entire time she was out of the car, wishing that she'd worn leggings or something under the skirt, but it would've killed the image she was trying to put forth. And because they'd had to walk through the cold from the car to the house, once she'd shed her coat, everyone who even glanced her way at the party could tell she wasn't wearing a bra, because her nipples were hard as rocks and threatening to poke through her top. Will had spotted a handful of guys look over at her and lick their lips before noticing how firmly her arm was wrapped around Will's waist. They generally noticed that Will had seen them checking her out and then slunk away, like they were afraid Will was going to walk over and beat the shit out of them. He still wasn't sure why that was.

"Damn man," one of his classmates, a guy named Dale, said to him as he walked up to them. "Never thought I'd see the day that Lacey McGuinness would be settled down and hooked up with somebody. You two look cute together, though." Dale was a burnout who was going to graduate with an art degree, even if it killed him, but lord knows how long he'd been on campus. He and Billy were great friends, so Will wasn't surprised to see him here. Dale was a tall gaunt figure of a man, dressed entirely from head to toe in denim, his stringy blonde hair hanging straight down to his waist, with a giant Megadeath logo on the back of his jacket, and tiny metal spikes poking from various portions of the outfit. "How'd you do it, man? How'd you tame the Skipper Queen?"

He'd heard the nickname before, since Lacey had been known to skip from man to man without ever settling on one for too long. "Ask her, not me, man," Will told him.

"He's got the biggest

dick

I've ever seen," Lacey giggled at Dale as she reached over and grabbed an empty red Solo cup, pouring some beer into it. "I mean, I fucking

felt

it when it went in, like I was touching the face of God."

"God's nothing like that," a voice said from somewhere within the swells of people before stepping out, as April practically sauntered up to them as somewhere in the back of Will's mind, he could hear an old arcade announcer saying 'A new challenger has entered!' Her dark hair was mostly hanging loose, but she had two braids of it running down on either side of her face, framing it. April was dressed in a cashmere white fuzzy sweater and a neat grey skirt that hung down past her knees, with long black socks extending up under it, giving not an inch of exposed flesh other than her hands, her neck and face. Around her neck hung a very large golden cross with a miniature version of Jesus affixed to it, something Will could never quite wrap his head around.

There was a comedian named Bill Hicks who'd often said "If Jesus comes back, do you think he's ever going to want to see a fucking cross again? It's like going to up to Jackie Onassis with a rifle pendant and saying, 'Just thinking of John, Jackie. Just thinking of John.'" Will had sort of always felt that way about depictions of Jesus on the cross.

"God is good and pure and noble," April said to them, flicking her dark hair back over one shoulder. "He's not considered with the physical realm in any way."

"Is that why God supposedly said, 'be fruitful and multiply' when he created humanity?" Will countered. "I mean, isn't that a direct quote from your good book?"

"It is," April said with a frown, "but that's Genesis, back when God had just created man."

"So God's opinion's changed since then?"

April looked a little relieved, as if Will had thrown her a lifeline instead of another trap. "Yes, exactly."

"And you know this... how?"

"It's in other books. 'Flee from sexual immorality. Every other sin a person commits is outside the body, but the sexually immoral person sins against his own body,'" she quoted at them. "That's First Corinthians 6:18."

Will smirked a bit. "Sure, but a bit later in that same book, doesn't it say that God will not let you be tempted beyond your ability?"

And suddenly, April's face was wavering a little bit once more. "Yes, but..."

"And you're coming in here with all this hate and no love. 'Anyone who does not love does not know God, because God is love,'" Will quoted back at her.

"That's true, but..."

"In fact, there's a

lot

of talk about love in that book of yours. 'As I have loved you, you also are to love one another.' 'Owe no one anything, except to love each other.' 'Love your enemies, and do good.' 'If I have all faith, so as to remove mountains, but have not love, I am nothing.' And yet, here you are, ready to commit all your fellow students to damnation because they aren't following some rules you've invented in your head that aren't even

in

that book," Will countered.

"But, but, but... 'women should adorn themselves in respectable apparel, with modesty and self-control,'" April started to stutter at them. "Timothy 2:9."

Will smirked, raising a hand to waggle a finger at April, as people were starting to gather around to watch the argument. "Finish the quote."

"W-w-w-what?"

"That's not the end of that verse and you know it."

April blanched and her olive skin was started to deepen with shades of red. "Is it? I, uh, I don't remember."

"Oh, then let me help you," Will said helpfully. "It goes 'with modesty and self-control, not with braided hair and gold or pearls or costly attire.'" He paused with a knowing smirk. "So with your braided hair and heavy

gold

cross, perhaps throwing stones isn't the wisest of things."

"It's a symbol of my devotion to God..." April murmured weakly.

"And yet, doesn't your book say, 'You shall not make gods of silver to be with me, nor shall you make for yourselves gods of gold,' or are you just skipping that portion?"

"That's not... you're twisting the words of the Bible," April said, her face scrunched up in frustration, her hands clenching fistfuls of the bottom of her sweater. "Thou shalt not commit adultery. It's quite clear."

"But whose definition of adultery are we to follow?" Will lectured. "Merriam-Webster dictates that adultery is sexual intercourse between a married person and someone other than that person's current spouse or partner." He paused, seeing April trying to shrink even smaller into herself. "No one here is married. Therefore, nobody here is guilty of adultery, and you're bearing false witness in accusing anyone of that."

"But that's..."

"And isn't that one of your Commandments? 'Do not bear false witness against your neighbor?' How do you justify that?"

"It's... it's still immorality?"

"But immorality is a sliding scale, and never defined all that well in the Bible. Plus many of the concepts there are outdated. I mean, don't even get me fucking

started

on how messed up Leviticus is."

"But, but, but... Sodom and Gomorrah," April tried to interject.

"Are a tale about adultery, pridefulness and uncharitableness," Will said, knowing he had her on the ropes. "If you read the text straight, it's mostly about the people of Sodom being inhospitable to Lot, his daughters and the angels who God sent to destroy the city because the city had a reputation of wickedness. But those punishments were the purview of God, and not left to the hands of man."

"But..."

"Your book is full of so many contradictions that I don't understand how anyone can draw faith or meaning from it, because it has dozens of authors, many of whom are writing in direct opposition to each other." April had clearly never been stood up to when she'd been proselytizing before, and the fact that Will could quote entire passages back at her had put the girl on her heels, clearly not prepared for this level of argument. "If you want to go around lecturing people about what's moral and what's right, maybe you should consider turning that judgmental gaze upon yourself first, because you aren't approaching them with an open hand but a closed fist, not with love but in anger. And love is mentioned more than almost anything else in that book of yours. 'Let all that you do be done in love.' 'Above all, keep loving one another earnestly, since love covers a multitude of sins.' 'Faith, hope and love abide, these three; but the greatest of these is love.' 'Hatred stirs up strife, but love covers all offenses.' 'Love does no wrong to a neighbor; therefore love is the fulfilling of law.' And my personal favorite, Mark 12:31, 'You shall love your neighbor as yourself. There is no other commandment greater than these.' So, if you're not going to bring love to others, April, what the hell are you even

doing

with your life?"

Will felt a little cruel turning all that knowledge on the girl, who was clearly not ready for a prepared opponent, but over the time he'd been working at the diner, he'd had to deal with a number of religious zealots who would storm in and want to pick a fight about how Will and whoever was working at the diner were going to hell. It had inspired Will to take a religious studies class last year, and he'd built what he called 'the Bible defense guide.' It meant he didn't have to memorize the entire fucking book, but that he had five or six pages of selected passages that he could use to make just about any point that he wanted, and he'd eventually gotten to the point where he'd run rings around those who had carried in their picket signs condemning homosexuality. Will particularly loved the scene in the from the West Wing when the president pointed out that if they were going to follow the literal definitions within the Bible, then he should consider selling his daughter into slavery, as sanctioned in Exodus 21:7.

After a moment, April started to cry and then burst through the crowd, running towards the bathroom, slamming the door shut as a number of people in the crowd jeered and laughed at her. Lacey turned to look at Will, a little bit of a frown on her face.

"I wanted her worked up, Will," Lacey scowled, "not broken down and suicidal."

"Like Picasso said, Lace, 'every act of creation is first an act of destruction.' I need her to be open to considering that the indoctrination she's been enduring for the last several years might not be in her best interests," Will sighed. "It's a rough break no matter how she gets it. But you should go see if you can talk to her a bit."

Lacey headed off through the crowd to follow April, as a couple of the guys sort of crowded around Will to ask him more questions about how he'd hooked up with Lacey, questions that he really couldn't answer. After a little bit, Will pushed away from them and started to move over towards the direction he'd seen the two women head off to.

As he came around the corner, suddenly Will felt a large splash of water, as someone threw a glass of water directly at him. Will was in shock, finding himself staring a man who looked maybe just a hair too old to be a college student. The man also looked shocked, but Will could tell it was for some sort of other reason. "Dude!" Will shouted, spreading his arms wide.

"Oh, uh, I, uh... sorry man," the guy said, turning his face away suddenly before disappearing into the crowd.

Will glanced down at his shirt, seeing it was still soaking wet. He scrunched up his face in confusion. It wasn't as though the guy had spilled it; it had felt a whole hell of a lot more like the guy had

thrown

it directly onto him. Will's nostrils flared a little as an unusual scent filled them. He reached down and grabbed his shirt, pulling it up to his nose. Was that... was that garlic he detected?

In

the water? What the hell had the guy thrown on him? Who the hell

was

he? And where did he

go

?

He was still reeling with confusion as he made his way over towards the bathroom, finding the door shut, but at least Lacey was on the other side of it, and not standing outside. He knocked quietly on the door. "Girls? It's me. Can I come in?"

"Oh God, he probably hates me!" April's voice said from inside, somewhere from inside of a sob. "Don't come in please!"

"He

doesn't

hate you, April," Lacey's voice replied. "I'm going to let him in."

"Are... are you sure?" April sniffled.

"No, but fuck it, I'm going to do it anyway," Lacey answered as he heard the click on the door unlocking.

A moment or two later, he reached down and jiggled the door handle, finding that it opened, so he pushed in the door and stepped in before closing it behind him so that nobody else would come in, at least for a few moments. April was sitting on the toilet and Lacey was sitting on the edge of the tub next to her, holding her hands. "You okay?"

"I was so mean to her, to you, to both of you," April said. "And why? Because I thought some, some, some

book

told me so! And I thought I knew it so well, but you tore me to pieces in like five minutes! What have I been doing with my life?"

"It's never too late to change," Lacey said to her former friend. "You want to go somewhere less crowded and talk about it?"

"No. Yes? Yes. Maybe. I guess."

Will chuckled. "Which is it?"

April looked down at her feet again then looked back up and nodded. "But I don't think I can face all those people out there."

"Don't worry," Will said as he helped her to her feet, putting one of his arms around her shoulders. "Nobody'll say shit while I'm around."

"Thanks," April said as they started to move towards the doorway before she looked up at him. "Why do you smell like garlic?"

"You know, I'm not entirely sure of that myself," he chuckled.

They moved out of the bathroom, and sure enough, there was a small crowd, all of whom looked like they were about ready to say something until they saw Will's glare, which cowed everyone into quick submission, and nobody dared voice a sound as Will moved down the hall, April under one arm, Lacey under the other.

As they stepped out of the party, Will was fairly certain that he could see the guy who'd thrown the glass of water on him standing down at the end of the block looking on, but he didn't have time to think about the dude much right now. Because his shirt was soaking wet, he was instantly chilled to the bone on the way from the house to their car, cranking the heat on high even as they started to drive the short distance across town back to Will and Lacey's place, nobody saying anything during the tiny trip.

He pulled his car into the garage and closed the door behind them before hopping out of the car. "Let me take a quick shower," he told them as they entered the house, "so I don't stink like garlic anymore. I'll be back in like five minutes."

Lacey smiled at him, kissing his cheek. "Okay babe. Me and April will just catch up a little bit while you're getting hosed down." She reached down and pulled his shirt up and over his head, exposing his chest for April's view, and he could hear her breath catch, and swore he could even hear her heartbeat start to race a little. Lacey bunched up the shirt, giggling. "And toss

this

into the washing machine before you do, otherwise it'll stink forever."

He nodded, walking down the hallway, stopping to toss the shirt into the washing machine but not yet turning it on, otherwise it would only be fighting the shower for hot water. He stepped into the master bedroom and then into the bathroom, shucking his shoes, socks, pants and boxers before hopping into the shower.

One of the things he loved about his house was that the warm water was on almost from the very start. He didn't want to be away from the two of them for too long, but it was clear they were doing a little bit of catching up, now that April wasn't completely under the sway of whatever church had gotten their fingertips into her.

Five minutes later, he smelled much more like Irish Spring than he did garlic water. He toweled himself down and then grabbed a pair of boxers and a fresh pair of jeans, pulling them on. He grabbed a t-shirt, but didn't put it on yet intentionally, walking down the hallway to them, just starting to put it on as he came around the corner for them to see him again. "Okay, much better now," he said to them.

"How the hell did you end up smelling so badly like garlic, babe?" Lacey asked him with a giggle. "Someone spill one of those pizza dipping sauce cups on you?"

"No, some dude threw an entire glass of water at me."

"Wait,

at

you? Who? Why?"

"No fucking clue. Never seen the guy before."

"Super fucking weird," she said before patting the space on the couch between the two girls, motioning for him to come over and join them. "April was just telling me how she thinks you're cute."

"Oh my

gawd

, Lacey, how could you?" April said, covering her face with her hand in embarrassment. "I just meant you've got a cute boyfriend, that's all."

Will moved to slump down in the center of the couch with Lacey on one side of him and April on the other. He'd sort of expected Lacey to move closer to him and April to move further away, but instead, both women had sort of leaned in a little bit. "Well, thank you."