A Letter to My Warder

In the Year of Grace 2008 of the New Era, the Third Age

Dearest Eric,

I pray to the Light that this has reached you in time. I tried to allow for the late winter storms that should be passing through Sheinar so that you could have this with you on your name day. Sadly, I can remember a time when we would be lighting the Bel Tine fires and welcoming the spring not planning against the burdens of winter. But the Shadow still touches the pattern and we must continue to be the ones who stand strong and fight.

Please uphold my honor to the young man who has delivered this letter to you. He has traveled far and if he has reached you unharmed, then he has earned the right to join your campaign. This reward I promised him when he accepted this task from me.

I still don't understand why you forced me to stay behind at the tower while you headed into the Blight to join Lord Anglemar and his men. I would have thought I have proved myself in battle to you by this time. You belong with me at my side. But, I will say no more, I gave my word that I would never force your path and I know that this is a personal debt you feel must be paid.

It has been many years since we have been apart for this long and I am uneasy in my feelings. The bond we share has allowed us to feel each other's emotions for many seasons, but with you so far away, I only know that you are alive and that you are still in the cursed Blight. I know not if you are tired or even injured and it has put me in a sour state. I can only hope you are well, that the light is protecting you when I cannot.

Nancy has finally revealed that you spoke to her on the eve of your departure. (Is that where you went when you left my bed?) While she continues to keep her own counsel, I can surmise that you requested her to be my companion in your absence. Fear not, she has upheld her word. Nightly, she visits my room after the last supper bell has rung and provides companionship to me. I must say, she has tolerated my sulkiness with grace. She tells me stories to make me laugh and forces me to play games to keep my mind occupied. I will admit to you, my love, that I have allowed her to become my pillow friend again. Please know that you can never be replaced, you are a part of my soul and I would never survive without you. Nancy understands that, and we are merely trying to hold my loneliness at bay until you return. I seem to have become a bit of a harridan among the Green quarters. My mood changes with the wind and the accepted and novices alike have learned to take care in my presence.

It was after one such incident, when I berated a novice for not showing due care with her lessons, that Nancy decided that it was time for me to find another outlet for my raw emotions.

She quietly sent the crying novice to her rooms for the night and closed the door to my apartments with a loud bang.

Still annoyed, I gave her a sour look and asked to be left alone. My feelings have been plain for all to see and I did not feel the need to explain. Simply put though, I miss you. I yearn for your embrace and ache for the feel of you inside me. I will never complain again of you knowing my thoughts before I speak them. It is a small price to pay to have you by my side.

Nancy, still quiet, walked over to me and firmly enveloped me in a hug. I struggled at first, but soon I found comfort there and began to cry on her shoulder. She stroked my hair, held my tight and murmured softly to me that you would be home soon. Safe. With me.

I soon felt drained of tears and began to pull away, thankful for the friendship she has shown me. She only allowed me to escape so far as her arms kept me prisoner a while longer. I looked in her eyes and saw her love for me. We have been kindred souls for many years now; our time as novices is still remembered by Sheriam, the Mistress of Novices. Our confidences have been shared during many teary nights.

When she leaned forward and placed her lips on mine I did not resist. She has been my companion in the past and my soul has felt so lonely without you that I let myself believe that she could comfort me.

I began to kiss her softly, then more powerfully as my unspent urges began to rise in me again.

Each night I try to release and surrender myself to the light, but I have not been able to truly find freedom since you left the Tower. I thought maybe, this time, I would be able to climb the heights and fly among the stars. This time I would find release.

Nancy pushed me back onto the bed, our bodies sinking into the feather mattress together. She lay on top of me for quite some time. I think she wanted to give me time to confirm in my mind that I wanted this. When I decided to bond you as my Warder, I told Nancy we would never be alone together again and she had drifted from me somewhat since that time.

I was ready and willing to try anything to take away the ache that seemed to consume me more and more each day. I nodded silently to her and raised my head to her lips. My teeth bit her lower lip softly and I tugged at it, pulling her down to me.

Now that the deal had been made, she no longer hid her desires from me. Her hands quickly undressed me. Pulling my laces hard and fast she soon had me naked upon the silk coverlet. I am afraid that some of the garments had to be sent to the seamstress for repair. It was well worth the price however.

Her tongue was like a lost friend and she spent hours reacquainting herself with my body. I am a little older now and I wear many more scars now than I did as an accepted. The others Greens always find that odd, but they usually fight in battles where healers are available. Many of our battles over the years have taken place within sight of the Mountains of Dhoom and rarely has there been a healer with us. I heal all those who fight with us, but there has never been anyone to heal me so my wounds usually have to wait a long time before healing takes place.

Finally she reaches my clit and my nub is soon trapped in her teeth. Feeling her suck on my clit while her tongue flicks at it softly, I soon cum against her face. I feel a little disappointed as the orgasms you bring me to are so much stronger that they reach into my soul.

Nancy continues to rub her mouth hungrily against my pussy and with shaking hips I push myself up and into her welcoming face. I feel her tongue enter me as she begins to fuck me with her face. Her tongue has always been large and admired by the other sisters as she can force it to become fully rigid and flat. It is the perfect size to stimulate my inner walls giving me a slight stretching feeling.

I moan loudly, thanking the Light that it is common practice in the Green quarters to ward our apartments against eavesdroppers. If we didn't, the Greens and their Warders would never get the rest they need for battle. Not when most of us have 3 or more Warders bonded and living with us. Do you remember when Shayan forgot to set her own; we were up listening to them until dawn. I had always assumed that the Warders took turns, unwilling to share their Aes Sedai, but I was wrong, as the sounds we heard were definitely of a woman being ravished from every direction at once.

Ahhh, that reminds me of a bargain you made to me that I have yet to collect on. Is that why you did not want me to join you and your men in the Blight? The only woman around with so many men? Tsk, tsk, I would have thought you knew me better than that, lover. If in the world of men, it seems as though I am the one in control.....then in the bedroom there can be no doubt that you are the one in charge. I will always do as you command, lead and I will follow.

Let's not forget about my original tale Eric, I know you are touching yourself as you read these lines. I want to be there in some way for you today and this tale will surely have your mind connected to mine no matter how far apart we are.

Nancy has heard my moans and her tongue fucking has increased in tempo. It's like she thinks that she can reach into my depths and satisfy me as much as you can. Never, but let her try. Oh.... let her try. My hands have grasped her hair and I am pushing her further into me while my hips rise to meet her face. I can feel my juices flowing and imagine them slicking down her chin, it will be so sweet to lick myself from her lips. She has now laid her hand upon my bud. My small, tightly closed rose bud. I try and still my thoughts and imagine it slowly opening, just as I have done countless times when searching for the true source. Her fingers are swiftly stroking across my clit, the pressure increasing against me. No longer soft and light, she is now pressing firmly against me. Pushing my clit down into me. Her strokes match her tongue and I easily surrender to her and allow my next orgasm to wash over me. Cascading over me like a waterfall.

I release her head and pull myself from her. Sitting up on the bed, I pull her up to me and find her lips with my mouth. Kissing her hungrily, I allow my tongue to lick my juices from her. The taste of vanilla and honey seem so pure and sweet. I have always wondered why I enjoyed the taste of my own joy so much, but the question never stands long in my thoughts as I usually become consumed with a hunger for another taste. Your taste.

It's at this time that I can smell you in the air. Confused, I turn my head, expecting to see you standing there. But I cannot sense you near to me. You are still in the Blight, fighting the Trollocs and whatever else has been spawned within the depths of Shayoul Gul.

Nancy smiles knowingly and pulls my head back to her as she forces her tongue deep into my mouth. Her hands are holding my head and the power in her kiss surprises me. It is almost masculine, so hard and strong against me.

Quietly she pushes me back into the silk covers of the bed. Reaching down, she places her hand on my hip and urges me to turn over. I comply, yearning for what is to come next. I pull up my knees slightly and push my hips back so that my ass has been raised in welcome to her. I feel the cool air touching me and drying the juices against my skin. The warmth of the fire has kept most of the chill away, but after the heat of her mouth, my cunt feels as though it has just felt a winter breeze brush across it. With the skin of my ass and thighs prickling with new goose bumps, I sense her moving closer to me. With eyes closed I bury my head into the pillows. I want to believe this will be you coming to me. You, getting ready to plunge inside me. While never a match to you, the hard, long shape that Nancy designed with the one power is more than enough to satisfy a woman in need. I can hear the buckles as she straps her creation to herself.

Oh God, Eric, I want you inside me so much. My soul cries for you.

I can feel the head touch against my lips and I start to bring my hand back to open myself further. She brushes my hand away quickly and without allowing me to become ready, she plunges into me fully.

The explosions that are erupting in my brain could match any Illuminator's best work and I allow myself to sink back onto this hard shaft. Her hands grab my hips and she begins to fuck me hard, without any sense of kindness whatsoever.

I am sensing something is wrong. Something is not right. I try to clear my thoughts enough to understand, and I realize that it is the hands on my hips. They do not have the softness of a women's skin. They are rough and calloused, the hands of a fighting man. Your hands, hands that I would be able to recognize even if all the light has left this world.

My eyes shoot open and my head whips back to look at you behind me, grinning wickedly at me. Confused, I look into your eyes.

I know that this is not you, as my bond does not lie. Looking deeper into your eyes, I suddenly understand everything.

With flashes of shock, jealously and hurt, I now know that you did not just speak to Nancy that night. There would be no way for her to know the exact hard lines of your body if she did not witness you clothed in only the light. Betrayal crosses my heart and I close my eyes. The thought of you touching her and making love to her fills me with pain. She/you are still pummeling in to me and I try to pull away from you. You laugh hoarsely and hold my hips tight, bruising my skin. The pain brings tears to my eyes but that is nothing compared to the tears of my soul.

Slowly however, the workings of my mind push to the surface. She is fucking me like she "thinks" you would be. She is assuming that you are a powerful force who needs to make his partner submit no matter what the cost. Finally, I see that I've misunderstood and a slow smile spreads across my lips.

No, you have not betrayed me. She has never felt the soft touch that hides beneath those hard hands. She has never felt the sensuality of your lovemaking.

The image of you standing in the moonlight, shadows caressing your body, pride and honor your only clothing, brings a touch of tenderness to my heart. Showing Nancy all that you are so that she may remember and bring up your image to be used in my hour of need. How you must have hated standing there, knowing that it would be her, not you, who would try to satiate my hunger during these long winter nights.

Eric, my love, that you would endure that so I would not feel the full burden of loneliness, is something that has truly touched my soul. Thank you. Even though my body hurts with the forcefulness of her fucking me, I smile and push my pussy back onto her hard shaft. I will play the part and let her think she is fucking me the way you would. My fingers grip the smooth silk of my pillow and I let my mouth bite into the fabric as I try to relax my cunt enough to take her in fully without too much pain. I will let myself fall into the fantasy and try to believe this is you. That you are with me, filling me, completing me.

I can feel her thrusts slowing down, her strength behind each push lightening. She is finding a steady rhythm that, with my loosened pussy, I am starting to enjoy. Moans of pleasure escape my lips as I let myself feel each and every inch of your cock as she slides in and out of me. I can feel Nancy making the pace quicker, she must being getting excited. She is becoming more and more comfortable in your skin and it is showing in her lovemaking. Your lovemaking.

You reach forward and slide your hands up and over my back, the calluses rubbing against my smooth skin. Your hands grasp my breasts and squeeze firmly, pinching and pulling on my rock hard nipples. Another moan escapes my lips and you lean forward and kiss my back and shoulders as you continue to massage my tits.

Your pace in fucking has been steady and strong and I am feeling myself climb higher and higher with every thrust. I push my pussy back hard onto your cock, wanting to explode with you. You pull away from me slightly and next I feel your hand on my clit rubbing hard and fast against me. You want me to cum; you are forcing me to cum. I surrender. My hips buck wildly as a strong orgasm passes through me. I assume you are going to explode in me at the same time, but you don't. You are holding back for some reason. Your pace has not changed, there is still the steady rhythm pounding into me as my walls clench and tighten around you. The feeling is glorious, riding through these waves with never a change in your tempo.

As you feel the orgasm begin to subside, you pull your shaft out of my dripping cunt. I can feel the stickiness slide down my thighs as I whimper into my pillow. Not yet, don't leave me yet. I begin to collapse against the bed but you catch me and deftly turn me over. My breasts so big and soft, my nipples so tight and hard, inviting you. You climb over me and straddle my waist. Leaning forward, you kiss my lips harshly, your tongue forcing its way into my mouth. I hungrily kiss you back, sucking on your tongue, trying to hold you captive. Slowly, you pull back and slide yourself further up my chest. Your cock swollen, hard, angry looking. Your hand grips your shaft and you guide it between my breasts. My hands grasp each tit and squeeze them together to create a tight passageway around your shaft.

Slowly, you begin to fuck my tits. Lubed by my cunt, it slides easily back and forth. My hands squeeze tighter and you moan while looking into my eyes. I smile and let my tongue pass through my lips, inviting your cock to come closer. The next thrust you make is so hard that your dick hits my mouth before I even have time to open it. Grunting, you stroke again and I open my lips and catch the head of your cock with my tongue. The taste of us mixed together is so powerful to me that my hips rise from the bed as my pussy begins to clench and pulse again.

I look up to you and softly tell you to fuck my tits. I want to see your face as you cum all over me. Your pace increases and my hands push my tits together even tighter. My fingers are trying to knead your shaft as it is buried in my flesh. On the end of every stroke my mouth tries to catch your cock and suck you into my mouth. But you are impatient, your control almost lost and you fuck my tits just like it was my pussy. Ignoring me completely, you stroke in and out of my breasts in a fast and hard rhythm. The cum from my slit is letting you slide easily in and out of my tits. A smile spreads across your face as you get closer to coming and with out warning you push your cock through to my mouth and explode onto my face. I open my lips and stick out my tongue hoping to taste the full glory of you. Your cum is covering my hair and face and it feels wonderful against my skin. Hot and thick it slides down my tongue into my throat. Wonderful.

Satiated, you lean yourself back. A mischievous smile that I have never seen before now adorns your face. As I look at you, your image begins to shimmer and fade. In your place, Nancy's image solidifies and it is now her who wears that smile and is sitting on top of me.

She leans forward to kiss me and to lick your cum off my face. She cleans me fully and seems to relish in the act of it. Then she finds my mouth and kisses me lazily, contented. She drops herself forward, exhausted and lays herself at my side. Entwined like this we fall asleep and we let our dreams continue our lovemaking for us.

At times, I really did believe it was you with me; I let myself fall into the fantasy and enjoyed every second of your touch. Thank you for arranging this for me. You are my love, my friend and my life.

So, now, you sit alone in the Blight, reading my words. I know you are excited, even with the bond stretched so thin, I just know. Before you take control and stroke yourself to release, allowing your cum to spill on that cursed ground, calm yourself. Find the void and bring yourself back to the present. You have yet to open my Birthday present and you will need all your energy for this.

Please summon the young man who was brave enough to deliver this letter to you. Once he arrives, take him to an isolated place where you will not be disturbed. This is very important my love, please follow these instructions from me.

Once you have him alone, acknowledge that you have read my letter as this will be his signal to continue with the plan I have laid out for him.

Look at him......look closely. Can you see it? No? But you sense something, don't you? Do not be alarmed, he is no threat to you. Once he sees you are ready, he will let his disguise fall.

Eric Gai'din of Malkier, meet Nancy.......my gift to you while you fight the Shadow and force me to stay behind. She will watch over you and heal you and ensure you come back to me alive and well. She has also agreed to be there for your pleasure. To satisfy all your needs. Just remember to not let the other men know of her existence or she will be ravaged by all. I leave her protection in her hands.