"Sir, I politely inquire if you have any special assignment that could get me a bonus. My wife and kids, oh my kids have grown up so much, would like to live in a house. And, I need a good bundle of money for a down payment. I am not asking you to raise my salary. I am asking you, if there is any extra task or mission that would make you a great deal of money and me a little extra."
Peter was a self assured sales man for a Canadian timber company. He was neither married nor had any kids. The pitch was formulated to appease to the owner in front of him. The office was full of family photos: The little portrait groupings, the scenic vacation shots, and the kid doodled hand paintings.
The office had a large behemoth of a desk. The giant window behind the owner overlooked the lumber yard. There were giant piles of tree trunks. The trucks and cranes had the square grips typically used for large lumbar. A large barn housed saws, whose aggressive whine vibrated through the window. Burly men in overalls and yellow hard hats milled around the yard.
By any measure, Peter was a tall and well built man. As most sales man, he was preoccupied with his appearance. He pushed heavy irons in the gym. The suit was bought in the finest store of the big city five hours away. His mid length hair was neatly gelled and combed back. His black leather shoes were shined every single day. His smile was neatly practiced in front of a mirror. However, among the hulking lumber jacks, he looked like a skinny school boy.
The owner was twenty years Peter's senior. Two fluffy clouds of gray hair sat on the owner's left and right side of the head. The bottom heavy body had been wedged into the leather upholstered executive chair with the golden highlights. The chair and the body had become inseparably molded together like an old pair of fine jeans. The owner's hand rubbed back and force on the mahogany stained armrest.
"There is such a mission that would make me a good deal of money. However, I hesitate due to its delicate nature. Okay, here we go. Far up in the Northwestern Territories, there is a large forest that I own. Reports tell me of beautiful giant trees. We could charge a premium for those. Imagine a double wide conference table without the glue lines of putting different boards together. The trees are that large."
"The problem is that I already sent three surveyors up there. They did not return. I tried to pay local men to launch a rescue party. However, they all refused to enter the forest. Those three men have cost me a large sum of money in raised premiums to the company's life insurance policy. That's why I stopped sending any more surveyors up there."
"Tell you what. If you quit the group life insurance policy and get me all the surveying paperwork done in three months, I will pay you $50,000. That's a good bundle of money for you. You made last year, like what, uh like $65,000. That nearly doubles your take home. What do you say Peter?"
The road into the far North of the Northern Territories was a straight bee line gravel road through ever constant thick forest. Peter's large SUV was fitted with over-sized studded tires. The gravel gently sunk beneath the heavy weight of the tires. As the tires passed, the top gravel pieces were accelerated to a sharp shooting speed to fling over the gravel bed. A hundred satellite radio stations kept Peter entertained and fumbling with the dials.
With no traffic and well groomed gravel, Peter could accelerate the car at a high speed. The car slithered lightly side to side in the grooves and bumps of the road. Yet, he had to remain alert at all times. A large tree branch might have fallen down or a deer may stand dazed in the middle of the road. At 70 mph and straight road, he had a good view. Yet, any attempt at stopping the two tons of steel and provisions would be a long drawn out slide through the gravel with a tough fight to keep the SUV from rolling over. Worst, if he was disabled, nobody would come for weeks to rescue. Even a minor injury could have devastating consequences.
After two days, he arrived in Carmacks, the small timber village. His mind was baked from the long drive. Carmack was one muddy town square with five wooden buildings around it. The tavern had a welcoming sign. The office building was the only building with a large window, and the only building with a white painted facade. The other buildings were all dark brown painted with amber wood protecting stain. The remaining three building were boarding houses with bunk beds for the lumberjacks.
The early fall weather stuck its stiff cold fingers beneath Peter's clothes, when we walked across the town square to the tavern. The tavern was the toughest place on earth one could find. There were young men, middle aged men, and old men. There was not a single woman. Not a single man had a feminine figure. They all wore heavy sweaters and jackets. Only a single fluorescent tube lighted the whole place. The second fluorescent tube had been removed. The walls of the tavern were pitch black.
The men seated at the bar counter were like mighty island states. Anyone coming near their sovereign territories would have a fierce war on his hands. The bartender slammed a heavy bottomed glass on the counter in front of Peter. The bartender wanted to know, how many shots. The tavern only served whiskey, no water, no scotch. But, you could get it in as many shots as you wanted to.
The giant brawn with the coarse hair on the back slammed onto the bar counter and pushed the man next to Peter around. Thin scar lines ran across the hand from chopping and sawing accidents. The man had pitch black beard stopples and yellow teeth. Yet, his eyes looked soft like that of a Newfoundland dog.
"We are going to have a fight in ten minutes."
Peter gasped, "Please, there is no need for violence. I assure you that I am a very well behaved individual and glad to buy you a drink."
"Not us, you dummy. The tavern is putting on a competitive fight with betting. The two largest foremen are going to face off."
"Ah, I am so relieved that you say that. Let me buy you a drink anyway."