Hi! This is my first try publishing smut, something I enjoy reading but have never felt very gifted at writing. This is a little piece of porny urban fantasy, presented as if there is more to the story that the author will definitely get around to writing someday (this is probably doubtful, sadly, but I'm not sure).
It's an oddly specific fantasy that just captured my imagination one day, and that's the only reason I wrote it. Hope you like it!
(All characters are over the age of 18)
______
The clock in the corner of the screen read 7:33.
For a second, he didn't know why that seemed important. Then--
"Shit!"
Dashing to the kitchen, Daniel yanked the round window in.
Flying through on a waft of warm floral air, the fairy lighted balletically upon the faucet. A laugh tinkling from her tiny mouth.
"You seem to be a busy man, these days, Doctor Horndog," she sang up at him. Then put on a pouty face. "You weren't even looking forward to me?" Hands on her hips, she shook her long silver hair dramatically, puffing her cheeks.
"Sorry, Kyla," he smiled, unable to help himself. "I was distracted by a." The casefile flashed through his brain, the blue room lit only by his computer monitor. "Another thing."
"A porno?" she chirped.
"A work thing," his smile souring. "Why would I bother when I've got you? Anyway, that stuff's dangerous." How many cases had he helped with where either the perpetrator or the victim had gotten some kind of curse put on them via a malicious, spell-laced erotic video?
Kyla sat, overcome with giggles, straddling the faucet and hanging on with two dime-sized hands. "You are eminently teasable, do you know?"
"Shut up." He gave an unspirited glare. She knew he was a sucker for her, why waste any effort pretending otherwise?
"But isn't it kind of worrisome?" She cocked her head, crossing her arms, swinging her feet. "So addicted to work that you can't even remember your girly-appointments?"
He narrowed his eyes. "You probably snuck a look through the office window, right? You didn't, did you? Did you see my computer? It's work, it's confidential. I'd have to report that."
"Oh no!" she gasped, mock-fearful. "Would they lock me in a lamppost?"
(Yes, they really used to do that to fairies in America. I mean back in the 1800s.)
"You're funny," he said. "No. But, you know. I'd have to report it. I'd report it, and then I'd have to explain to my supervisor that I was home playing with a faegirl on a Friday night."
"It's fine, they'd just make you wear a shirt that says 'I Jack Off In Style.' And anyway." Like a gymnast, Kyla vaulted off the sink faucet. Enough power in her two palms to push herself airborne. Her gossamer wings started beating, a noise like murmuring harpstrings wherever she hovered and veered. "Anyway, don't get mad."
"Why?"
"I didn't see it, okay? Didn't see it, could've seen it, didn't wanna!" She stuck her tongue out at him. "So nyeh!"
And her musical laughter rained on him.
"Oh." Daniel did relax a little. And felt like a dork for taking things so seriously.
"It's too gross!" raising the back of her hand to her forehead, being dramatic. "Dead people? I
swoon!
"
"Yeah," he said. Not just dead people but dead pets. Dead things of all sorts. Daniel Shaw was a Practical Necromancer employed by the state, particularly in criminal cases that sought the testimony of the deceased. He didn't find the formerly alive gross. He found them tragic. But he smiled at the fairy on his faucet. "Sorry."
"What's wrong with paying faegirls, anyway?" Swishing up in front of his face, she winked. Twirled for him, her pink negligee flowing round her golden thighs. "We're cuties."
Daniel wanted to argue, but his grin made it impossible. "You're a monster," he laughed.
"Y'know y'like me!" she chimed playfully back.
And flitted from the kitchen.
"Want me to drip you out some honey?" he called after her.
"Do I ever not want your honey, Doctor Cumsack?" Her answer came to him like chimes on a magical wind, rustling his hair.
Daniel chuckled as he used a toothpick to put a few amber beads of honey on a plastic tea-saucer. Added a few large grains of salt on the side, which he knew she loved.
"Anyway," he called out. "It's not like I feel bad about it. It's mostly, like, a professional thing." He grabbed an empty glass and went to find her in the living room.
She was walking up and down his coffee table, impatiently flipping and tugging at the hem of her negligee, flashing her tiny set of pink-striped panties.
Seeing him enter, she hopped aloft for a moment, enough time for him to set the glass upside-down upon the table. This would be her stage. He set the treat-saucer to one side, her greedy eyes following it even while she landed on her makeshift dais, legs crossed at the ankles as her weight transferred from wings to toes.
"I had the song you used last time stuck in my head," he commented, unbuttoning his gray flannel. It fell to either side of him as he sat in front of the coffee table in his leather armchair. Adjusting his seat to be comfortable. Becoming excited as he looked at Kyla's small perfect body.
"And that made you think of
me
, probably. Right? And you beat your meat?"
"Don't fucking say 'beat your meat.'"
"I will if I wanna!" she sang happily.
"Yeah," he agreed, "you will."
Her gaze drifted from the snacks on the saucer, over to his hairy chest, up to his always-open face, his curious eyes... then down to the front of his sweatpants. She approved of Daniel. He was physically mundane, a little on the skinny side, but his penis had a pretty shape, and he had a lovely gaze. She liked his attentive, permissive gaze, like he was ready to see things we wouldn't understand, and welcomed them.
"What do you mean, though?" she frowned. "A professional thing?"
A wry laugh. "No, just. Sora--she's the detective I've been working with--she already thinks I'm a shut-in, and like. A closet pervert, I think? We have that stigma. Magicists with our focus. Necromancy, I'm saying, I don't know why I'm being... so cagey, but." He blinked, not remembering what he'd been saying. Distracted as he focused on Kyla's delicate face, her small bright purple eyes peering up at him.
"Pff." She waived a dismissive hand. "Perverts are fun. They're creative."
"Um," he said. "Well, regardless, I'm not looking to play into those suspicions."
Kyla had her thumbs under the straps of her negligee, but paused. Turning around, she flourished a hand, a ring on her tiny finger flashing.
The lightswitch by the door clicked, and the two lamps in the room went out. All was blackness, save for the gold outlines of the windows with the blinds pulled shut.
And her cloying voice suddenly sounded like it was right next to his ear. "Would you get mad at me if I told you my little pussy's kinda wet?"
He gave an involuntary shiver.
And then fairylights in ruddy orange and scarlet formed around little Kylalin, who was standing on her glass stage as if she'd never left it. The whisky glass suffused with the glow.
It took Daniel's eyes a moment to adjust. In the dim, Kyla became the brightest thing, this slender fairy in her skimpy costume, her flesh giving off its own gentle radiance.
"Kylalin," he said her name.
She grinned, seeing his face. "Just Kyla's okay, Danny-boy."
Kylalin Lala Lurin was what it said on her website. And probably on her ID. She'd been born in nineteen-twenty-something, though, she was a modern fairy. She could barely listen to her full name without getting distracted.
Kyla had become his regular appointment on Friday nights, sometime in the Spring. It was Autumn, now, and he was still just as enamored with her silly, easy charm as he was when she first darted through his window in a flower bikini.
"Hey, Kyla," he said slow, captivated. "You know?"
"Yes, Doctor Pervy?"
"You look quite beautiful tonight."
"Well," she nodded, accepting the complement with grace. "Then, are you gonna get your dick out?"