Trash day was a week away. I had just finished carrying all the junk back into the garage, when I was surprised by the big door closing on its own. For a moment, I wondered if I had pressed the switch, but then I was surprised by two new customers.
On of them was violet, the other nearly neon blue. They only had two eyes between them, but they were both super-sized. Below their cyclops-eyes they appeared to be wearing some sort of re-breather.
"Greetings, sir." said the purple one. "Is the yard sale still on? "Yes." I said, suddenly relieved. "Feel free to look around."
The alien's tentacles curled and uncurled nervously, while his companion chatted in a incomprehensible tongue. It was not hard to notice that he had neglected to activate the translator, but he seemed to be giving his opinion, though I did not know what he was saying. One of his appendages caressed the garage door opener.
Suddenly his robotic voice could be heard over his gurgles: "An interesting device."
"Not for sale." I said.
"Oh, I see." said the voicer, and somehow the words had a sorrowful robotic inflection.
"What about this contraption?" He indicated the broken snow blower disinterestedly. "I am looking for a gift for my..."
The voicer cut out, and I heard a series of harsh sounding clacks.
The robo-mouth suddenly drawled out: "Closest analogue: mother-in-law."
I began to think he was trying to work me, but two could play that game. The snow blower was old and rusty, broken, in fact. Most likely, it was one of the original snow blowers, and replacement parts could not be had for it anymore. I would have thrown it out long ago, but I did not think the trashmen would take it. It was heavy; probably, one would have to pay some sort of fee.
"Well, it has a lot of sentimental value. My great-great-grandfather owned it and his great-great-grandfather before him. It is sort of a family heirloom, in fact."
"How about five probes?" He said, and suddenly had five dildos in his tentacles. I think that they were transported down to him.
"I get ya. A barter, eh? Sorry, never use the things. Now my sister on the other hand..."
He clacked again and it sounded like grumbling. Then he made another offer: "How about a tactile transmitter and a one-half supplied can of nanobots?"
I was not an engineer, but I thought there might be a few bucks in this thing. Possibly, I could have it reverse-engineered and then take out a patent on it. I was not sure if they had any directive about spreading technology, so I tried to sound knowledgeable.
"Oh, one of those, eh? Does it come with instructions?"
"I'll teach your brain how to use it." said the alien.
"It's a deal." I said.
"No returns." said the blue one.
Suddenly, the he one grasped my hand with a tentacle, pulled out a ray gun with another, and, then, shot me in the head with it.
When I woke up, they were both gone. Oh, yeah... and I also knew how to work the tactile device.
But the instructions did not say anything about how to build one. I felt that my best option would be to break it up into pieces and then send them to different engineering firms.
Fortunately, I was something of a tinkerer.
I set the small white box on the table and activated the light on the magnifying arm. I expected some Phillips screws, or some Toryx screws at the worst. Maybe, I'd even need to break out the ratchet set, I thought. But, on closer inspection, I discovered the box was seamless.
Well, it was not the end of the world. Perhaps, I could have it X-rayed someplace; I had a friend who was a tech.
The only thing to do now was to test the device in order to make sure it worked.
For starters, I thought I would try a two-way transmission. The only problem was how to get a volunteer. If I tried to explain to anyone in my family about the aliens, they would have had me committed. Heck, I was not even sure if I were sane. I reached out to touch the device and then stopped. Perhaps, if I put my hand to it, I would just crazily imagine that I felt something.
I decided to do a double-blind experiment. Fortunately, no one was home, so I was free to make the necessary preparations.
My mother was something of a neurotic. She liked everything to be in order, so I picked the bra on the left. It was a sure bet that she would wear it tomorrow.
My sister, on the other hand, was sort of messy. Don't get me wrong. She did not exactly wear dirty clothes, but she always put off doing laundry until the last possible second. I had once caught her slipping her panties off and throwing them in the washer. For her, it was easy. I picked the only bra in the drawer.
The next step was easiest of all. I dipped both brassieres in the can of nanobots. Then I replaced them. I was extra careful to position the one in my mother's drawer exactly the way I found it.
That night, I could barely sleep. Part of it was my conscience. The other part was my level of excitement. Does it count as an Asian fetish if you're Asian—and also your mother and sister?
At breakfast, I flipped the switch. My mother felt my sisters tits, and my sister felt my mothers. It was double-double D's!
