Wolfs Kiss Ch 05

Shayna lay against Jake's chest as she slowly drifted back down from the clouds. She became aware of him stroking the back of her leg when her brain function returned to normal and she tried to roll away from him. Needless to say, he held her in place quite easily so she lay still.

"Jake, we really need to talk," she finally said after a few more moments of silence.

Inwardly groaning, Jake released his hold on her and watched her scoot away from him. He knew they needed to discuss their relationship, but he couldn't resist acting on their mutual attraction to each other. He had actually hoped to use it to his advantage but now realized it wasn't a good idea. And chasing her to D.C. just seemed like a stalker move now that he thought about that too. He hoped she would give him a chance to explain himself before she kicked him out of her apartment, or maybe even her life.

Shayna got up and grabbed her bathrobe from its hook behind the bedroom door. She didn't turn around to face him until she'd tied the belt securely around her waist. Taking a deep breath and running a nervous hand through her hair, she turned around and almost got weak-kneed at the sight of him lying on her bed. Apparently Jake was in no way modest, as he lay there naked on top of the rumpled sheets watching her. She almost asked him to cover himself before she realized she was being wimpy again. Mentally chastising herself for being a wuss, she reminded herself that she was a grown woman and needed to behave as such.

Walking to the oversized armchair by her bed, Shayna sat down and leaned forward with her arms resting on her thighs. She avoided looking Jake in the eyes as she searched her mind for the right words to say, but she came up empty-handed. So, she decided the best thing to do was to be as direct as she normally was -- at least she was until she met him.

"First," she began, finally making eye contact. "I must apologize for yesterday. I know I took the cowardly way out by leaving New York and not answering your calls. I'm really sorry about that."

She looked and sounded sincere in her apology, but Jake couldn't hide his feelings. "Why did you leave?" he asked, sounding more hurt than he probably intended. "Why wouldn't you talk to me?"

Shayna looked away and thought for a moment before answering. "Honestly, I was scared. I still am really."

"Of me?" he asked warily. His heart began to pound heavily in his chest for fear that she somehow suspected what he was and was afraid of him.

Jake seemed extremely tense for some reason and Shayna wondered why. Shaking her head, she answered, "No, not really. It's just that I've never acted so impulsively in my life. I mean, I'm the last person anyone would ever expect to become intimate with a complete stranger. I still don't know what came over me then." Looking at him with uncertainty, she said, "Or now."

Jake's gut twisted as Shayna averted her eyes and sat back in the chair. When he moved to sit on the side of the bed closer to her, she crossed her legs and folded her hands in her lap but kept her face turned slightly away from him. He ached to pull her onto his lap to comfort her but he knew that wasn't what she needed at the moment. She needed assurances, peace of mind.

"I apologize for coming on so strong. I have a tendency to act first when it comes to my instincts," he told her. "And from the first moment I saw you, I knew I had to have you."

Shayna looked at him wryly, then turned away again.

"I'm serious, Shayna. Maybe I'm not explaining myself clearly. It isn't just physical, it's deeper than that. Much deeper." He wanted to say more but this wasn't the right time. He wanted to explain that what he felt was the lure of his mate, that she was his mate. But he wasn't ready to tell her that and she wasn't ready to learn the truth. Thinking quickly, he tried a different approach.

"Shayna, I understand that you feel you're being irrational, that everything is moving too fast."

"This is all new to me, Jake. The things you do, the way you make me feel...it's not just that it all happened too soon. Being with you makes me feel that I'm walking on thin ice, like I could fall through at any moment and completely lose myself." Shayna's lips curled in a rueful smile. "I have to admit, the idea is kind of exciting. But at the same time, that's not how I live my life and that scares me."

Jake could sympathize with her dilemma, he really could, but he couldn't let her slip away from him. "Do you want me to leave?" he asked, his voice barely audible. If she said yes, he would be crushed but he wasn't going to give up. If she said no, he would do everything he could to make sure she never regretted her choice.

"I don't know, Jake," was her answer. "I have a feeling that I'm way out of my league with you."

Jake weighed his next question carefully. "If you put aside your uncertainty for a moment and thought about the time we've spent together so far, do you have any regrets?"

Shayna leaned back in the chair and closed her eyes while she thought about it. Goosebumps prickled her skin as she remembered how she felt when she first saw him when he stepped out of the limousine, how they moved together on the dance floor, the way he made her feel the first time he made love to her, and even how easily they talked at lunch once she let her guard down. And this evening, how they came together without saying a word to each other, it all felt so natural. It felt like it was supposed to happen. Only afterward, when she tried to rationalize everything, did she have issues.

Bravely looking Jake in the eyes again, Shayna shook her head. "No," she said. "I don't have any regrets."

Jake exhaled before he realized he'd been holding his breath. Moving slowly, he leaned forward and took one of her hands in his. The simple contact seemed to soothe both of them and Shayna had to admit that his touch made her feel so good on so many levels. Although she wasn't one hundred percent sure of herself and their (dare she call it a relationship?), she didn't necessarily want it to end any time soon.

Jake didn't want it to end either, so he offered Shayna a compromise, something to appease them both without getting in the way of progress. "We were really getting to know each other at lunch the other day. Why don't we slow things down a little and take time to get used to each other?"

"Okay," she readily agreed, smiling shyly.

Jake gave in to the urge to pull her onto his lap. Shayna went willingly and lifted her face to his as he leaned in for a kiss. He traced the seam of her lips with his tongue, and then slipped inside to ravish her mouth. Shayna twined her arms around his neck and kissed him back, letting her passion spill out of her. But when Jake parted her robe and gently cupped her breast, she covered his hand with hers and stilled his caress.

"Jake, we're slowing down, remember?" she asked breathlessly.

Jake groaned. "Ugh! Right. Slowing down," he grumbled. It sounded like a good idea when he said it a minute ago, now he wanted to kick himself.

Shayna chuckled. "We're slowing down, not stopping altogether. Besides, I need to stay sharp when I'm around you."

Jake took his time releasing her breast, gently stroking her nipple with the pad of his thumb. Shayna's lips parted as she slowly inhaled and he knew it wouldn't take long to raise the intensity of her arousal. But he'd given his word, so he steeled his resolve and planted a soft kiss on her parted lips while he closed her robe. When he lifted his head, Shayna took a deep breath.

"Thank you," she sighed.

"For what?" he asked, running his fingers through her soft, curly hair.

"For not ravishing me again," she replied. "I swear I don't know how you do what you do to me."

Jake smiled, flashing his perfect teeth. "I worked my mojo on you. I had to get you under my spell."

Shayna rolled her eyes and slid off his lap. Heading toward the door, she asked over her shoulder, "Are you hungry? I'm starving!"

Watching her move with such feminine grace, he felt himself harden again. The frumpiness of the bathrobe couldn't even hide her curves and she seemed so unaware of her effect on him. If he gave in to his animalistic nature, he would make her belong to him right here, right now. 'Patience,' he thought to himself. 'We have to be patient. She'll join us when the time is right.'

********************

"Gerard, I've just received word of another sighting of Marisa."

Gerard turned away from the window of his office and pinned his pale blue eyes on Alexandre, his closest friend and confidante.

"Who saw her? Where?" he asked. He tried to take the urgency out of his tone but too many people have been spotting Marisa lately. It couldn't be a coincidence.

"Tomas. He had just arrived at BWI airport yesterday on some business for your father. He believes he saw her there with a young human woman," Alex said.

"Was he positive it was Marisa? Did he detect her scent?" Gerard had to be sure if he was to follow up on this information. Nothing else had panned out so far and he didn't want to waste time and money on another dead end. But Tomas was one of the betas charged with Marisa's education back then and he would know her if he saw her.

Alex looked wary. "Well, he was a bit of a distance away and it was very brief. He said they made eye contact and he was sure she recognized him as well. There was some kind of commotion and she slipped away before he could approach her."

"And her scent? He didn't pick it up?" Gerard asked. This was sounding like the usual story. Someone from his pack thought they saw her but didn't detect her scent. He was becoming convinced that he was chasing a ghost. It just seemed odd that so many otherwise reliable sources could all be wrong.

Alexandre interrupted his thoughts. "No, he didn't get her distinct scent but he did follow the young woman she seemed to be watching. Here's her name and address." Alex handed him a piece of paper, then cleared his throat. "There's one other thing that made human stand out. Tomas said that he did detect a wolf scent, a male wolf. It was all over the young woman."

Gerard's interest was piqued and he quirked a brow. He looked at the name on the paper. "Gavin." Handing the paper back to Alex, he said, "Check her out for me. I guess it won't hurt to do a little digging. Maybe there's a connection after all."

Alex nodded and left the room as Gerard turned his attention back to the window. Alex knew his friend was appearing calmer than he felt and he wished they could put this behind them once and for all. But he also knew that was easier said than done. If there were any chance that Marisa was alive, Gerard would not rest until he found her. Or found her remains. All these years and he hadn't stopped secretly grieving for the one who was to be his mate.

To his credit, Gerard hadn't let his longing cripple him. As beta, and second only to his father, he not only had plenty of responsibilities to keep him occupied, he also didn't lack for female companionship. There were scores of women over the years who had hoped she would be the one to stir his beast, before and since Marisa.

Alex left Gerard's house and walked the short distance to his own. There were several people about, children playing and laughing, enjoying the beautiful summer day. He absently waved to those he passed on his way to his home. Quickly mounting the short flight of stairs, he entered his house and went directly to his study. After placing a quick call to Tomas, he poured himself a glass of scotch and settled down on his sofa.

This Marisa business was definitely taking a toll on Gerard and on him by extension. He worried for his best friend for more reasons than the obvious. Of course he wanted Gerard to find closure in Marisa's death but he was afraid that was not to be so. Her death always seemed fishy to him, no pun intended. It was believed that she had committed suicide by drowning herself in the river bordering the west side of their land, but her body was never recovered. It's true she was distraught over having to leave her old life behind but she didn't seem to be so unstable that she would end her own life.

Alex took another sip of his scotch as the events that led to Marisa's arrival into their world replayed in his mind. A rogue shifter was on the prowl, leaving a trail of destruction across several territories and in some human towns. He hadn't attacked any humans that they knew of, just farm animals and wild game. Guillaume St. Simon sent a small patrol of his betas to scour their land for any sign of the rogue with orders to capture him alive if they encountered him. What they encountered on the fourth day of their search was the body of a woman, badly injured and seemingly near death in one of the densely wooded areas of the territory. Two of the betas quickly took her to the main compound and their alpha ordered the medics to do all they could to save her. He and Gerard were off the territory at the time dealing with a business matter and did not know of the woman's arrival in their compound.

When they came back two weeks later, it was to Guillaume charging the betas with the task of helping Marisa transition into her new life. Although she'd been badly mauled, her scars were fading fast and it was clear that she survived because the rogue had infected her at some point during the attack. The rogue had since been caught and was locked in a secure cell inside the infirmary but was resisting Guillaume's attempts to force him to shift into his human form.

As they neared the infirmary to meet the mysterious young woman, Gerard became agitated. Alex could pick out the distinct new scent of the woman but it did not stir him nearly as much as it did his friend. Gerard's pace quickened and low growls were emitting from his throat. Even his red hair seemed to blaze to life as he rushed up the stairs to the medical building. Rushing through the lobby area, they didn't need anyone to point out her room. Gerard was in such a state that it was easy for him to follow her scent and he was in her room in a flash.

Stopping just inside the doorway, Gerard stood transfixed as he took in the vision Marisa made. She was sitting up in bed, several pillows propping her up, with a book in her lap. She was wearing a modest white cotton nightgown and her long, curly dark hair fanned out around her against the pillows. She'd obviously fallen asleep while reading and it was equally obvious that his best friend had found his mate. When Gerard became aware of Alex standing at his back, he whirled around, fangs bared, ready to attack. Luckily Alex had the presence of mind to immediately move several feet away from him.

The commotion awakened Marisa and Gerard immediately backed down when he heard her stirring. When she opened her eyes, it was to see Gerard standing at the foot of her bed with such a look on his face that Alex was hard pressed not to start laughing. His best friend, the alpha's son and heir, had been reduced to a heaping pile of mush! Gerard stood there looking at her with such longing, like he was about to beg her to accept him. And Marisa for her part simply stared at him wide-eyed for she had no idea who he was or why he was giving her puppy-dog eyes.

Knowing Gerard would likely try to rip his head off if he entered the room, Alex went in search of the female medic to make the introductions. When they returned, Gerard and Marisa were still in the same positions looking at each other. The medic cleared her throat before entering the room to get their attention. She quickly introduced them to each other, making sure to emphasize to Marisa that Gerard was the alpha's son. With her duty done, the medic left the room and Gerard cautiously made his way to her side. He gently lifted her hand in his and brought it to his lips for a light kiss then lowered it back to the bed.

Alex cleared his throat and Gerard flashed him an angry glare. Holding up his hands in a non-threatening gesture, Alex said, "I'm going home to clean up and rest. Come get me when you're ready to give Guillaume our report." Then he left the two of them alone to get to know each other.

And that's how it was for a while. Gerard visited Marisa every day and almost lost it any time an unattached male came too close to her. His father had to intervene on several occasions and ordered him to control himself because she simply wasn't ready to deal with mating yet. She had her own problems and didn't need to add a hot-blooded male to her list of troubles. It was heartbreaking to see her mourn her old life while trying to accept her new reality. She was leaving behind her family and friends because a veritable monster had torn her away from them.

It took some time, but Marisa eventually seemed to start coming to grips with the change she was undergoing and understood why she couldn't live among humans any more. After being with the St. Simons for a few weeks, she'd progressed enough to be integrated with the rest of the pack. By then, all the unattached males knew Gerard's intentions toward her so they wisely kept their distance. He became her self-appointed mentor and protector and, against his father's advice, he began courting her. Marisa was reluctant at first but Gerard could definitely turn on the charm when he needed to win over someone. And when she finally let down her guard, he asked her to be his mate. She agreed.

Maybe she was lonely or maybe she didn't fully understand what it meant to their kind to be mates, but she definitely wasn't ready for such a commitment. Gerard immediately went before the elders and told them they wished to be mated. The elders gave their consent and blessing and preparations for the mating ceremony got under way. Marisa was obviously overwhelmed by the planning and the volume of arrangements to be made. And she seemed horrified when the elders explained to her what was to happen during the ceremony. There was so much to take in and such a short time to get ready. Gerard insisted that the ceremony take place in one week, as he was impatient to make her belong to him.

Alex pondered for a moment. Now that he thought about it, he shouldn't have been surprised that things turned out the way they did. There was so much going on, Marisa had a hard time keeping up. She was trying to move forward with her new life but she was still grieving for her old one too. It must have gotten to be too much. That's the only explanation he could come up with for her throwing herself into the river.

********************

Jake leaned back into the soft cushions of the sofa and stretched his long legs in front of him. Shayna had prepared a fantastic lunch and he'd eaten more than he probably should have. Now he was relaxed and content to channel surf while she loaded the dishwasher.

He was extremely pleased that Shayna was becoming more at ease with him since their conversation the previous night. He kept his word and refrained from initiating sex but he couldn't resist touching her every chance he got. He would pull her close to him while they lounged in bed or on the sofa, he stroked her hand as it rested on the table while they ate, he would walk up behind her and wrap his arms around her while she brushed her teeth or while she was cooking.

It took tremendous effort not to throw her down and sink himself into her body but he did enjoy stealing those little touches. And he knew she enjoyed them as well, especially when he idly caressed her breasts or rubbed the juncture of her thighs through her panties. She would gasp in surprise at first but the smell of her arousal would soon fill his nostrils. He kept telling himself to be patient, the time wasn't right, but deep down he was really afraid she would reject him once she learned the truth.