What We Must Ch 05

Dear Readers,

Sorry for the long wait. Cold weather and long days at work have curtailed my writing time. Here's the next chapter.

Happy reading,

KemMyst

*******

Beth was asleep, curled up in Anne's bed. They'd all gathered for a meeting to discuss what to do next. Devon began. "Alright, does anyone have any suggestions about how we help Beth? We don't have much more than three weeks before the next full moon."

Jen spoke first. "Devon, I don't know what we can do. I'm not sure she'll be healed by then."

Anne gave him a hard look. "What about Spencer?"

Pain on his face, Devon responded. "No need to worry about him."

Anne looked at him, then the others. "He's hurt her, in more ways than one. Let me tell you what's going on in her head. She feels betrayed by people she loved, and trusted. She feels ashamed. She wonders why she didn't see any sign that this was coming. She wonders if he would have stopped if she had fought him harder, if there was anything else she could have done. But most of all, she doesn't know if she'll ever be able to trust a man again."

"And how do you know all that?"

"Because that's how I felt, when it happened to me. Only I wasn't a virgin."

"Did Spencer...?"

She shook her head. "It was a long time ago." They sat, transfixed, looking at her eyes. Normally brown, they were now glowing amber. "But what Spencer did to me..." She trailed off, shaking her head again.

"What happened?"

She looked each of them in the eye, refusing to avert her eyes as she described what was done to her. "He followed me into the tunnels. I tried to get away from him but I couldn't. He was too strong." She took a deep breath, her eyes continuing to glow that amazing color. "He told me I wasn't going anywhere until he was done with me. He slammed me against the wall and told me what he thought of me. Then he lifted me off the ground to the point where I started having trouble getting air. Then... Well, let's just say his idea of foreplay was less than pleasant."

"What did he do?"

The question came out through her clenched teeth. "Do you really think you want to know?"

"Yes."

Her chest heaved slightly in anger as she answered him. "You aborted the main event, but his prelude was to try and twist my nipple off and to shove his fingers in me." They all winced and recoiled. "What? You're all still shocked by his actions?"

"Are you hurt?"

She shifted her eyes to him, her mouth a tight line. He had heard her cry of pain, smelled blood, of course she was. "I thought we were here to talk about Beth. I don't know why you insist this has to happen now, particularly after what she's just been through."

Devon was getting angry in response to the anger she was displaying. "These are desperate times for us. We can't just do as we please. She has an obligation to her kind, our pack."

"And what about your obligation to her?"

"Anne..."

Anne ignored the suggestion. "She needs to stay where she feels safe for a couple of days. It looks like, for whatever reason, it's with me. Hopefully I can get her out to take meals but I make no guarantees. She has to come to terms with this on her own. I will tell her my experience and try to get her to realize that it wasn't her fault or anything she did, that Spencer can't hurt her again, and that he was an aberration.." she looked pointedly at the men, "and she'll be OK. It'll be some time before she'll be comfortable around males though."

"If she wants to talk, she will. Don't ask her what happened. We don't need to know details and we don't need to find the rapist. And, don't ask her if she's OK. She isn't."

*****

He'd failed two of the women in his pack. And he'd had to kill Spencer as a result. Rapist. Spencer was a rapist. And he had violated Anne too.

And she had been raped by someone she knew, someone she trusted, when she was young. That explained quite a bit.

Beth stayed in Anne's room for three nights after the attack. She clung to Anne, particularly when the men were around. She sat beside Anne at the table, not speaking, head down.

Slowly, she began spending some time alone, although she still seemed uncomfortable when she was near the males, and opening a door on her still made her jump.

The men had taken Nick in hand and, with some input from the women, attempted to prepare him for the events that would occur at the full moon. While Nick and Beth had both been present at these ceremonies and were aware of what went on, Beth would be compelled to mate and would likely react badly afterward.

The choice was made by default. While, under normal circumstances, the female would pick her mate, the council's edict now forced any fertile female in the packs to mate with one of the males, willing or not. Beth could conceivably mate with Duncan, Marcus, Sam, or Nick. However, Amanda, Anne, and the third human female they would get come spring would be serviced by Devon, then Duncan, then Marcus, then, perhaps, Nick or Sam. However, Nick was close to Beth's age and she had shown a preference for the two youngest males of the pack.

Unfortunately, with Spencer dead, that left Nick. Beth and Nick would be married and mated at the next full moon. And, as reluctant as she may have been when the decree was announced, she would be even more hesitant now. She would not be happy with what her wolf demanded of her.

Devon was frustrated by this turn of events, between the full moon and Anne's increased scent, he wanted nothing more than to go to her, be with her, lose himself in her. The urge to mate with Anne was so powerful that he could barely focus on anything else. Thank goodness Amanda was still on her monthly.

But, he couldn't push Beth out of Anne's room to do it. The bigger obligation, as Anne had so ruthlessly pointed out, was to Beth right now. The only thing he could do was sleep outside Anne's door at night.

*****

Beth realized, intellectually, that Spencer couldn't hurt her again, but that hurt in and of itself. That he felt he had to do this to her and that he was gone.

But still, the smell of the males made her edgy. There was something about Anne's bruises that called to her, that made her feel like she wasn't alone. She had known what to do when Beth showed up in her room and she was willing to let her stay there for a few days. Anne commiserated with her, told her her story, and told her that it wasn't her fault.

Devon's scent was mixed with Anne's in her room. Beth began to associate the smell with safety and security again. It helped her begin to heal.

She went back to 'her' room. Actually, they had moved a bunch of her stuff into another room, and she had a new bed. But she was jumpy whenever the door opened. After another couple of days, she went back to her old room; her hand trembled as she grasped the knob and turned it. She entered, hugging herself, and closed the door on the others.

*****

Spencer's room had revealed his deterioration. He had been in Anne's room; her missing t-shirt was in his. One of Beth's drawings of Anne was standing up on the table, dried semen staining it.

In the nightstand were several pages of paper filled on both sides with his handwriting. It started simply enough, with discussion of the decree and his reasons for opposing it. Then, directly into Anne's capture, how he had felt, lines describing what she had smelled like, what she had tasted like, how he wanted more. His growing obsession with her and frustration at being unable to have her.

Then things turned darker, outlining what they should do with her. It began with the fact that she was only a human and, therefore, inferior to them. That he wouldn't put up with her arrogance, her defiance. That her scent made her different than the other one. Why should they defy nature? If her smell had them all ready to jump her, why shouldn't they?

Devon had made a mistake. In keeping her for himself he was only making it worse. And, going to them every other night? Ridiculous. He should be plowing into both of them every night, and then demanding they suck his dick for him in between. Letting them have their own rooms? They should both be in his bed. He should be able to demand they bend over for him whenever he felt like it, and whenever any of the other men felt the need. They should be walking around naked so they could be touched or used on a whim. The goal was to get them pregnant; they should be fucked as often as possible, by any or all of the males, mated or unmated. After all, if there was some sort of virus, who knew if their females could even get pregnant anymore?

Yes, just tie them down and use them. It's not like they could stop them.

Then, in disgustingly graphic detail, he described several scenarios, what he would do to her, how he would degrade her.

After giving the papers to Duncan so that he could read them, they were burned, and, while Devon was loathe to waste anything, many of Spencer's things went into the flames as well.

*****

"Devon, she hasn't asked for any more medication, and it should be her time."

"You mean she's pregnant."

"Possibly, we should wait a couple more weeks to be sure. Stress can sometimes shift a woman's cycle."

*****

Beth's birthday, in early winter, was celebrated with a special meal although she, herself, didn't feel much like celebrating. But, she was beginning to open up again, seeming much more like her old self. Although she still could be found in tears, on occasion. Nick had begun spending more time with her, walking, talking, holding her hand, and giving her a little peck on the cheek before leaving her at her door at night.

Nick was three years older than Beth, and the prospect of the impending marriage both thrilled and frightened him.

The wedding robes were being readied, as was the chamber for the rites.

As the next full moon closed in, Devon realized Anne's scent wasn't peaking again. It was still there, of course, but lower, and steady, and now mingled with something new.

It could be true, then, she could be pregnant. They would have to see to this after the marriage.

Beth began to get more anxious as the full moon approached. Anne noted the growing anxiety and started hunting through the cabinets in the kitchen and pantry. Lily and Amanda caught her rummaging. "Anne, what is it? What are you looking for?"

She'd pulled everything out of some of the shelves, and was looking intently at each item before replacing it. "Anne?"

She looked up at them. "Where are the herbs?"

Lily looked back at her, confused. "The spices are in the..."

Anne interrupted. "No, not spices. Herbs. Don't you have any?"

"Like what?"

"Camomile. Lavender. Valerian. I'd rather we didn't have to resort to drugs - that is, depending on what you've got in Medical."

"What are you talking about?"

"Beth's starting to lose it, and I don't want to see her hurt anymore than you do. Since you're unwilling, or unable, to put off this damned marriage ritual I'm trying to find something she can take that will calm her down a little."

"Sedate her? That would be worse..."

Annoyance. "No. No. Gods. Not sedate, nothing that powerful. Nothing to make her feel she's lost control. Just something that could settle her nerves a bit. Maybe help her sleep. Camomile. Something?"

"I'm not sure..."

"Well, look. Like I said, camomile, lavender, valerian. It could be oils, teas, or just plain herbs. If you don't know, ask me."

The three of them continued hunting through the cabinets. Just as Anne began to despair of finding anything, Amanda found some camomile tea in the back of one of the upper cupboards. The container was still sealed and Anne opened it to the familiar apple smell. "Good. It's got a pleasant taste so we shouldn't have much trouble getting her to try a cup.

Valerian would be better if we could find some but this should help."

Anne hunted down Beth, who was currently pacing in her room. She was carrying a small glass bottle and a little piece of paper. As soon as Anne walked in she burst into tears.

Anne opened her arms to Beth, who fell against her. "Oh, Anne, I don't want to do this, I'm not ready."

Stroking her hair, and listening to her sob, Anne backed slowly to the bed. She sat on it, while Beth curled up, her head in Anne's lap. They stayed like that, quiet, well relatively, as Beth continued to cry. Eventually, Anne spoke. "Beth, I've found a couple of things that might help you feel better." She paused a bit to let that sink in. "I don't really understand why this has to happen now, but I've been told it's because you're of age. And that, if you don't, you'll go mad and dangerous."

"I don't know if I can."

"I don't blame you, Beth. It's being forced on you. But, if you can make it through those few hours, things will get better. I've watched Nick; he's worried about you."

"I.. I.." She couldn't continue and the crying worsened.

There was a knock on the door and Nick's voice was heard. "Beth?"

Anne replied back through the door. "Give us half an hour, Nick."

She paused briefly before asking the next question. "Do you love him, Beth?" She sniffed, nodded. "He's going to be afraid, too. He doesn't want to hurt you, or frighten you. I can't tell you what to do, but, if you try to keep your eyes open you will see how much he cares for you and know it's not Spencer." The crying became a little more intense again. "I can't promise you that it won't be painful, but you need to believe that, with the right man, it will also be very pleasurable. You'll be amazed, hopefully often, at how good it can feel to have a man touch you, to have him inside of you, to feel his weight on you. I hope you and Nick can find that."

She turned and looked up at Anne, her eyes red and wet. "Does Devon make you feel good?"

Anne hesitated, how do you answer a question like that in this situation? She sighed. "Beth, that's a complicated question to answer." She paused again as Beth continued to look at her. Another sigh. "Yes, he does. He knows how to touch me and takes me to climax, which I hope you will feel sooner, rather than later. But it isn't as wonderful as it could be."

"Why not?"

"Because, Beth, we don't love each other. Because your council's decree has forced us together. And, mostly, because I won't let him."

Beth sat up, and looked at her, surprised. "You won't let him? But, why?"

Anne touched her hair. "Sweetie, I'm not here by choice; I wasn't born to this; I don't want to be herei

"Making love was an expression of love between two people, where both enjoy the giving and receiving of pleasure, where each one wants their partner to feel as good as they do. There are many ways to do that", a sad little smile came to Anne's lips, "a million flavors of love. You can, and should, teach your partner what feels good to you, what you need. It's not just sex, it also includes kissing, cuddling, touching. Fucking is something else. Usually one person is concerned only with their own satisfaction but not the other's." Beth looked to object. "Devon tries, but I didn't invite him to my bed. I'm a whore here, Beth, nothing more."

"Anne, you're not..."

"I brought you something that might help you sleep. I'm going to put a drop on this piece of paper. If it's too much, just throw it outside the door tonight and we'll try something else. I've also found some camomile tea, which is calming, if you'd like to try it." Beth nodded. "I'll go let Nick know he can come in now."

*****

It was some time later that Beth ran into Devon. "Hey, Devon, can I talk to you?"

"Of course, Beth. What can I do for you?"

"Um, can we go someplace private?"

"Oh. Sure. C'mon." They head for the workshop as he considered what she would want to talk to him privately about. Probably something to do with her upcoming nuptials. It wouldn't be an easy conversation. He closed the door and turned to her. "OK, Beth, what is it you want to talk about?"

She looked unhappy, unsure. He has to remind himself that she was not the little girl who joined his pack a few years ago but a young woman soon to be married.

"Devon, I was talking to Anne earlier." Oh, jeez, now what? Beth paused. "She's really not happy here, is she?"

He looked at her and his mouth fell open. This was nowhere near the conversation he expected. "Uh, no, Beth, she isn't."

Beth chewed on her lower lip. "I figured we've all been nice to her, and she said you make her feel good, but she said she was just a whore here."

Good god. What had they been talking about? "Beth, what were you talking about?"

"She was telling me how nice it could be", Devon looked at her, "you know, sex." He couldn't believe where this conversation had gone but nodded. "That, with the right person, with someone you love, that it could be wonderful."

He took a deep breath, released it. "She's right, it can be."

"She said she hoped Nick and I could have that." Devon nodded. "So I asked her, I asked her if you make her feel good."

He was startled, and curious. "And what did she say to that?"

"She said it was complicated but that you did and you took her to climax." He was now hanging on every word. "But she said it wasn't as wonderful as it could be."

I can't believe we're having this conversation. "Did she say why?"

"Yes." Beth dropped her eyes. "She said it's because she won't let you."

He sighed and nodded. "It's the truth, Beth."

"I don't understand; why would she do that?"

"Because she's stubborn. Because she doesn't want to be here. Because if she gives in she thinks, oh, that she's giving up to the enemy. And, maybe, because she's punishing me."

"Does it bother you?"

"Yes."

"Can't we do something?"

He sighed again. "We can't make her change her mind about us. All we can do is treat her kindly, talk to her, try to get to know her, respect her wishes..."

"Oh, so, is that why you don't do those things?" Devon nodded. "But you want to."

"Yes, I would enjoy them, and I'm sure she would too. But I don't, because she doesn't want me to. I don't want to make her feel any worse about us, me."

"I like her, Devon. I want her to stay. I want her to be happy."

"She's not going anywhere. But she's the only one who can make her feel happy. All we can do is try to make life here pleasant for her."

She nodded, and looked at him for a minute or two. "Devon, do you like her?"

She's a pain in my ass. Another sigh. "Yes, Beth, I do."

She stood up to leave. "Good."

*****

Devon stood just outside the chamber. A sheer cloth was draped over the entrance and a light shone from the back of the room. The others were ranged around in a small semicircle. Anne and Amanda, unsure of their places, were pulled into position with the women. The men were ranged on the other side, slightly removed.

Devon spoke to them all. "Today is a special day for our pack and in the lives of two of our members. Today we witness the union of Beth and Nick. Will these two, the man and the woman, please step forward?"

Hand in hand, Beth and Nick came forward. Beth was gripping his hand tightly, and both were nervous. They both wore robes with a couple of simple ties in the front. Both were wonderfully decorated and dyed in shades of green.

"Beth and Nick, are you prepared, at this time, to join together as lifemates?"

Nick cleared his throat and said yes while Beth, who looked about ready to cry, nodded her head.

"The chamber is prepared. The pack is ready to witness the union of your bodies in this form in commitment to each other. May your marriage be happy and fruitful."

The rest now intoned, "May your marriage be happy and fruitful."

Nick took Beth's hand and led her behind the cloth. With the light behind the two of them, the rest could clearly see what was happening, and would be able to hear everything. Nick took Beth's face in his hands and kissed her. He backed off a bit and took hold of one of the ties on her robe. Anne watched her hands quickly come up to stop him.