What Are You

"It's not me, it's you."

I couldn't believe this! Shane was really breaking up with me. We'd been going out for about a month now, and tomorrow was my birthday.

Not that it mattered, I was going to dump him as soon as I lost MY FREAKIN' VIRGINITY. Isn't it supposed to be easy? Aren't men supposed to have one track minds? I'll admit that I might not be the prettiest thing, and I am kind of boyish, I have short hair, a too round face, I'm shorter than average, smaller than average breasts, hips that look too big for my body... nevermind, I understand why boys won't sleep with me.

"Cut the bullshit Shane. We all know that's the most used breakup line on television. What did I do now? I'm sure I can make it up to you." I said without looking up from his piano, which was turned down low.

"Okay, Alex, I'll be honest. You're too cynical. You act like you don't care and you make too many jokes. I get that they're jokes but they sound so serious! I just don't think our personalities can work together."

Well duh, you have the IQ of a brick. I snicker aloud. Shane's body is smoking hot and everyone is aware of his particular skill set. He's the best choice I have to get rid of my virginity.

"Shane, sit down and shut up. We both know you're just trying to pick a fight."

"Alex, you're a real bitch. I'm glad I didn't sleep with you, who knows what kind of diseases I'd be affected with by now." He slams the door on his way out. It's his apartment and I know he'll figure it out soon enough.

I go to his room and grab my coat. I look up in the mirror and see a tinge of redness in my eyes. I snort at myself and leave the room.

~

I sigh as I return to the paint-chipped, off white door. Home sweet home. It's locked, as usual. I lean over and pull out a pick from my back pocket.

A quick glance side to side tells me no one is looking. I jimmy a few things and I'm in. The pick is replaced and I shut the door and lock it behind me.

"Hello?" I call into the silent apartment. In the week I've been gone I call tell things haven't been going too well. Take out boxes and beer cans litter the floor and coffee table. The lamp is busted and the couch has new, mysterious stains. My nose crinkles in disgust at an unknown smell.

I head to the closet that is my room and turn on the light. My solitary mattress in the corner is the only "bed" in the apartment with clean sheets. I have a plastic tub for my clothes, and a small table for anything else I may possess. A single outlet and a small wooden box shoved behind the plastic tub are the only other things in my room.

I take off my clothes and search for a clean towel. No luck. Hopefully no one comes home for a while so I can drip dry.

My shower is too cold and unpleasant, but at least it's running this week. I get through it as quickly as possible and shake like a dog to dry faster. I'm in my room trying to tame the fluffy mass of blonde that is my hair when the door has a solid knock shaking it on it's hinges.

I curse loudly, pulling clothes over my still wet skin, making them stick to my body. I stomp to the door and sling it open, prepared to yell at the unwanted intruder.

"You dropped these," says a very masculine voice that I know belongs to this broad chest in front of me. I look up and see a fantastic jaw, inky black, mussed up hair, smooth dark skin, raised eyebrows, a smirk, and a pair of the most alarmingly green eyes you've probably never seen. Upon closer inspection, there are definitely violet specks in them.

I realize he's holding up a pair of my underwear that I must've dropped on the way back from Shane's. I did stay there for 4 days, after all. They're the most sexual pair I own, blue lace with mostly strings. A deep red blush colors my face.

"Cute," he says, leaning in close. "So do you have a name, little lady?"

I hear a loud smack and I see his eyes widen in amusement and a little shock. I realize I've slapped him. It makes my embarrassment worse.

"I'm not fucking little," I say.

"And it appears you're not a lady either."

I try to snatch my underwear so I can go revel in my mortification alone, but he pulls back. He lifts them above his head. Damn his 6'4" height.

"I believe you owe me an apology," he says with a smile. I contemplate punching him in the stomach to see if he'll still be smiling after that.

"What do you want?!" I yell up at him.

"How bout a kiss?" He says, not even trying to contain his laughter. I try to knee him in the groin, but he sidesteps it. I turn around and let him keep my panties, slamming the door in his face.

~

I wake up to the sound of yelling and someone banging on my bedroom door.

"Wake up you stupid slut!"

Great, my uncle is drunk again. I dress quickly for work and try to compose my fear. I hate that the old man can instill fear in me, I hate it a lot.

I step out of my room and try to head for the door. I'm almost out when I feel a strong grip around my arm.

"Where were you last night? Fucking someone for money? No wonder your daddy left you."

I yank my arm out of John's grip. He's feeling particularly nasty today. I expected that though, considering it's 7:30 and he's drunk.

"I have to go to work," I say quietly. His eyes narrow on his doughy face.

"Why isn't this place clean? I keep you around and feed you and this is the thanks I get?" His words slur together as he grabs my arm again and he squeezes painfully hard.

"John, let me go," I say, my voice raising. My head snaps sideways from the sting of the blow from the slap he's just administered to my face.

"You think you're big, don't you slut?" I bite my tongue until I taste blood, willing myself not to cry. He shoves me on the ground, slamming my shoulder. He stumbles away laughing to himself. I get up and leave as quietly as possible.

~

Work is slow, painfully slow. Cashiers at general stores don't exactly get much pay either. But the box in my bedroom has slowly been filling up with funds to get away from here. Things could've been so different if my dad hadn't left when I was 7 and if my mom hadn't been killed in a car accident when I was 13. But I've been trying to work with what I have.

Around 3 in the afternoon, the whir and ding of the automatic doors opening alerts me to a customer coming in. I sit up quickly and try to look like I wasn't guilty of almost falling asleep. I look over and it's him. The annoying guy with my underwear.

I turn and try to hurry to the bathroom and let one of my coworkers deal with him. But it's too late.

"What a coincidence." "Go play in traffic." "I missed you too."

I keep walking to the back, where my boss' office and the faculty restroom is. I ignore the footsteps behind me and walk in. "Oh Alex, come here."

I walk to my boss, a pleasant, balding man in his early 40s.

"Oh, is this your boyfriend? Introduce me Alex!"

I realize with a start he's followed me in here and I almost growl with annoyance. I grit my teeth and manage to smile.

"This is..." I realize I don't know his name.

"Just call me Salt."

"And he's NOT my boyfriend."

"Yet," Salt adds with a smile.

Mr. Brok smiles and says, "it's nice to hear you talk so much, Alex. I'm letting off early to spend time with your...friend and more importantly because it's your birthday. Have fun!" He leans over his desk and continues working.

"Mr. Brok that's really not necessary," I start to say, but Salt grabs my arm and yanks me out of there. I wince as a look of pain crosses my face.

Salt gets an inquisitive look on his face before he grabs my hand instead and pulls me outside.

"I really appreciate that intrusive interruption but I really have to go now, Salt." I say with a scowl.

He ignores me and pulls up my sleeve.

"What the fuck is this," he almost growls, looking at a bruised, black handprint on my arm.

"My boyfriend and I were having rough sex in his car and he got carried away."

"Alex, I know you're lying." "Salt, I know you're invading my personal space."

He grabs my chin and gets very close to my face.

"You're playing with fire, Alex. I've been very nice to you so far but my patience is running thin. Others of my kind would have killed you at this point. Now tell me who did this."

The purple in his eyes started to eerily glow as he said this, and suddenly I can hear my heart beat in my ears. No. No, no, no! There's no way I'm afraid of this asshole.

I lift my chin up in defiance and I'm looking at the ground in the same moment. He actually threw me over his shoulder! I begin to slam my fists into his back and yell, but a hand covers my mouth. The other grabs my butt and I squirm in irritation. He chuckles and throws me in his car.

"Let's have a little conversation, Alex."

The flirtatious, arrogant, young asshole is gone, and in his place is a terrifying, powerful man. I try to escape but his eyes glow violet and the door is locked and my hands are held before him against my will in an instant. Hysterical laughter begins to bubble up inside of me.

"What are you?"