Dropping the large basket I had been carrying, I stared at Noelle, my eyes wide and jaw to the ground at what I had just witnessed.
I groan into the palms of my hands, "Why?" I yelled at my companion, "After I've told you so
many
times already!"
Noelle simply scratched her head, her strong brows raised in confusion. Not the reaction I wanted from her,
especially
after eating the mushrooms that we've been running around all day to collect. She must have finally seen how furious and panicked I was because she shook her head in dismissal.
"Come on, Hellene," she said with a rueful grin, her sharp teeth on full display, "It was just one mushroom out of the
three
huge baskets you've been having me carry. Besides, orcs have different constitutions than humans, this probably won't affect me one bit."
I rub my hands over my face in frustration, "That's not entirely the point! I know your immunity's way stronger than mine when it comes to poisons, but I haven't studied orc medicine well enough to know how this would affect you in the long run!"
Noelle shrugs and sidles closer to me. She puts a large hand over my shoulder in reassurance, grin still bright and reassuring, "Well," she said in full confidence in her chest, "If anything happens, I'll have the best healer from Laki Village to Liit City taking care of me."
I flush at her bold complement and lightly pinch the arm that was on my shoulder, "Don't act like this is a minor thing, Noelle," I warned my friend, "to us humans, these things are aphrodisiacs. I've had patients come to me with erections that lasted
days
! I can't even imagine how orc physiology would react to velvet ridge mushrooms."
Noelle shrugs again, "So I'll probably be horny for a couple of days," she said simply, making me wish I was tall enough to yank her ear in frustration, "I'll just lock myself up in my room and do what I need to do!"
"You know that means you're gonna need to have sex, right?"
"Or masturbate, not sure if any human here is kinky enough to fuck an orc my size."
I rubbed my hands over my face again in frustration. Hopefully rubbing it hard enough would also scrub away the urge to volunteer to be her partner if the aphrodisiac
does
affect her. Noelle did have an amazing physique...
"Come on," I sighed, eyeing the large baskets that hung over Noelle's back, front, and other hand, "We have enough mushrooms to make my tonics, let's go head back to the pharmacy...and that way, I can observe you for any symptoms."
"Sweet!" Noelle cheered, her hand that was on my shoulder picks up the basket I had dropped (thankfully I hadn't spilled anything) and carried it herself, "Come on, I'll buy us lunch once we get home, that mushroom tasted like cat tails except they don't blow up in your mouth."
"Why am I not surprised that you've bitten into a cat tail before?" I said as we made our way back to the village.
Noelle cackles, "I was a tiny baby orclet," she explains "I was hungry, and my mother was taking too long with our laundry. She laughed so hard when it blew up on my face that she almost slipped into the lake."
== == ==
Here's the thing about the velvet ridge mushrooms. They were extremely potent when they were freshly plucked out of the Kailaki Cliffsides. Back in the day, people would simply sell them as is with the dangerous risk of a sex drive that last days. It would be foolish of anyone now to buy them as mushrooms when pharmacists like me had developed tonics that control the intensity of the effects. It's a month's long process of drying the mushrooms, grinding them, and then mixing them into batches with the appropriate potency for each race and gender. They're highly sought after by humans and elves of all ages. The former for pleasure and recreation, while the latter to help with procreation.
In a few months' time, once the tonics are ready, and the fertility festivals start around the region. Everyone will be flocking to get a bottle of my tonics. Easy gold!
Orcs on the other hand...I'm embarrassed to say that I haven't had the chance to study their physiology. I had lived most of my life around humans, elves, and dwarves, studied medicine from each race, but I have never met a scholar or healer that would teach me orc centered medicine. Hell, I've never even met an orc until Noelle. I would have no idea how the velvet ridge mushroom would affect a female orc.
Speaking of...
"Hey, Hellene?"
I turned my head to where Noelle was. She was eyeing me with an amused and easy expression on her face. "Sorry," I said sheepishly, "do we have a customer?"
Chuckling, Noelle shook her head, "Nope, we closed an hour ago, actually. Just thought I'd come down to let you know that dinner's ready."
My stomach lets me know that I had lost track of time once again, "Oh good!" I said, standing up to wash my hands on the nearby basin, "I hadn't even realized how hungry I was until now, thanks Noelle."
Dinner was amazing as always. Noelle was a great cook, and it never ceases to amaze me how good she was at almost anything she tried her hands on. I told her so just to see that sharp-toothed, but merry grin of hers.
"Thanks," Noelle said, "got the idea from an innkeeper way back when I traveled through the Palagana archipelago."
"Oh, I've never been..." I mused and took another bite, "Now we need to go if this is the type of food they have over there!"
"We should!" Noelle agreed, "I just know you would like it. Maybe we should travel there since you'll be rolling in gold once you sell off all your magic sex potion."
Sputtering, I raised a finger to argue with her about my tonics...but lowered it after a moment. She wasn't technically wrong about them. Instead, I just glared at the smug look she was directing at me.
"Speaking of my Velvet Ridge Tonics," I redirected, "are you feeling any different since this morning?"
Noelle shook her head, "Nah. Orcs might just be immune to those things, I guess..."
"Hopefully," I conceded for now, "but we can never be too careful, Noe. I'll have to do another check up tomorrow afternoon, if that's okay."