The Journal of a Connecticut Yanee

Authors Note: Throwing out some love and credit to authors Breakaway Republic for the great scene involving Oppai, and to Moongrim for his extensive input as well as use of Arawn, Didi and the MBI

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July 6th cont...

"You don't have any authority over him." Didi shouted in argument to the Lilim.

It was a shit show of epic proportions. Of all the things that could have happened. She hated me, despised me, you would have thought that she would be happy to get rid of me, yet there my daughter stood trying stop Druella from taking my happy ass away. It just made no sense. Why?!

I pinched my eyes shut briefly as the chaos happening was quickly careening towards disaster. She had at gunpoint Druella whom had, in turn, somehow instantly summoned a sword of Dark Matter in her hands. Molly had appeared behind Didi with her scythes unsheathed, ready to kill, and I had Winona drawn on Molly, defending my daughter. All the makings of train wreck that would have an Amtrak exec proud...

If I didn't do something soon, someone would die and I was damn sure it would be Didi. A Cyclops didn't stand much of a chance against a Lilim, let alone a Mantis with her scythes ready to decapitate.

The marble in my pocket once again started to heat up, then I began to hear whispers in my ear. There were so many, so faint that I couldn't make them out. It was like something out of a fucked up horror movie. God, maybe I really was going insane?! I could feel scorching pain from my pocket and pressure building up as the whispers, they got louder and louder, but I still couldn't understand them. They soon became a deafening roar as I cupped my hands over my ears and squeezed my eyes shut. I'm sure that I cried out in pain but I doubt anyone heard me. Then...

Quiet.

I opened my eyes to see everything had frozen in time. Didi and Druella in mid shouts of each other, Molly still had her scythes aimed at Didi. There was no sound. I couldn't even hear myself breathing.

Remember who you are.

That voice, it was Romie's! I tried to speak, to shout, to ask her where she was, how to find her but I couldn't. I was just as froze as everyone else.

Remember who you are.

God damn it Romie! Where are you! How can I find you? Please! I miss you! I love you! Please!

Remember who you are.

What the hell does that mean?

A light enveloped me and I found myself kneeling before Misrelda, the Queen of Hearts. She wrapped her lithe arms around my neck and whispered into my ear,

"I'm I happy she found you... Son..."

Yeah a regular ol' in-law of the Lilims, lucky me.

Another light and I was standing in the Maou's throne room with Romie holding my hand. She turned and gave me a large, mischievous grin.

"Let it also be known that the man next to me is Donnie, also of Earth. Prince and Hero to Wonderland as well as my husband and my love."

Shit Romie, I'm no damn Hero or a Prince!

The scene shifted again to the evening in the Maou's parlor where I first met Arawn for our night out.

I asked about letting Romie know where I was going, the bitch turned her head to me and said, "While you're having your night out, my granddaughter and I will have our night in. Both of us have much to catch up on and I've been craving a little girl talk as of late. Now you two boys have fun and don't get into too much trouble. Remember Donnie, you now count as royalty here so do behave..."

Royalty my ass. Evidently not royal enough to keep you from fucking me over, you cunt.

I was finally returned to the parking lot with everything still frozen.

Remember who you are.

Suddenly everything began to move again.

"...he's an American citizen and under no obligation to go with you."

"And I have quite a few senators wrapped around my finger, child. Senators that sit on committees whom oversee your pathetic little bureau. But right now, I would worry about my own well being if I were you..."

I began to get the jist of what she was trying to say to me but... Come on, Romie! That plan is bat shit crazy! It's...

It was then, I was struck by an epiphany as my dumbass finally figured out what she was really saying. A feeling of calm filled me as it all became clear. I knew what I needed to do.

Now that's thinking like a Cheshire.

God Romie, I miss you.

All my doubts had vanished as a clear direction revealed itself to me. I had been underestimating myself and they had been underestimating me.

I would set things right, then I would find you Romie. That I promise.

With the marble no longer burning a hole in my leg, I tucked away Winona and calmly walked between the space of my daughter and Druella. There was now a crowd around us with their phones out, recording the scene.

Good, the more eyes, the more video, the better. I wanted the whole world to see this, in particular though, a certain other Lilim that might be able to help me...

"Just what in the hell do you think you're doing?" Demanded Didi.

Ignoring her, I took a deep breath, and in as loud and as confident of a voice as I could manage, declared, " I am Prince Donnie ————, Hero of Wonderland, husband to Princess Romilia Smith de' Cor'Meum. Daughter of the Queen of Hearts, Misrelda de' Cor'dibus. I am also the man responsible for giving the Maou the access to Earth. As a member of the royal family, this will stop right now. I am not some kind of object to be fought over. I will choose my own direction."

I heard various gasps and whispers among the crowd of both Human and Mamono. Druella glared angrily at my public admission of such things as Didi lowered the muzzle of her revolver in cautious suspicion of what I was doing.

"The prattling of an insane man." Druella laughed aloud in show for the crowd.

"Then maybe your big sis Misrelda would be willing to set things straight?" I retorted. I had a hunch that the Lilim both feared and respected her older sister despite being a good foot or two shorter. After all Misrelda was the one who created Wonderland which was one of the first Demon Realms besides the Royal Maki. She kinda helped set the bar.

Her face fell in between that of fear and anger. It seemed that I had called her bluff and won.

"Does that mean I'm a princess too?!" My grandaughter called excitedly.

"Not the time, Vicky", I answered back sternly, then continued with my statement to the whole damn world, "Also, as a member of the royal family, I am under diplomatic immunity to any and all charges brought against me. I, however, do agree to accompany officer Didi to meet with her superiors in regards to my actions of both past and future."

Didi's eyebrow raised as I looked over to her. I then turned my attention to Druella who looked like she was getting ready to me stab me through with her blade. From across the small distance, I met her eyes and as distasteful as it was, I did owe something to her. Was she an obnoxious, rich, prissy bitch? I'll go on the record to say, "fuck yeah, she is." But, in my heart of hearts, I didn't think that she deserved what I had done to her. I had to grow up, to accept and admit that I had been fucking up.

"Druella... Aunt Druella. I've... made some mistakes. You took care of me when I was in a coma, took me into your home, gave me a place to stay and I did a lot of bad things to you and others. You... and they didn't deserve that. The things that I did were incredibly wrong. I'm sorry, and I hope that maybe you can forgive me and that some day I can make things right with you."

The pure black sword lowered, but I couldn't get a read on her face. Maybe she was still thinking about killing me, maybe she was in shock of my apology, I honestly didn't know. But there was still more to say, sparing a quick peek to Didi, I continued,

"My path though, it doesn't lie with going back with you. I have people who have come into my life that I need to connect with, to learn about. Afterwards, I'm going to search for Romie and find a place here in this world."

Druella walked towards me, her sword disintegrating in mid step. She stopped a foot away from me and coldly whispered, "You have spilt secrets that should not have been spilt."

"I would rather it that, then the blood of my daughter," I retorted back to her.

"You are a fool that knows nothing of what you're doing. You charge head first without the slightest inkling or regard to anything or anyone. Eventually Donnie, it shall be your downfall."

That was something I couldn't argue against. Funny thing was what she said was true, but regardless, what was done, was done. The things I had to do were what I believed, what I hoped to be, the right thing. And if they weren't... Well I guess I'd have to cross that bridge when I got to it.

"Your mom once told me she cherished life above all else. It's probably one of the very few things I can say I admire about her. Let's not disrespect that."

She glared at me a few moments longer then said quietly, "There will be consequences... and questions."

I nodded at the ominous statement as I figured as much.

"I understand."

"No, you don't." Is all she replied as she turned to walk away.

"I meant it."

Druella turned her head back to me in question. I swallowed hard, sometimes doing the right thing wasn't easy. She didn't deserve the things I had done to her.

"I'm sorry. I really am-"

An open palm with perfectly manicured, pure black nails swung and struck me across my face in a slap, silencing my apology.

"We're leaving, Molly." She called to the Mantis.

Hand on my cheek, I watched as the Lilim walked to her limo and got inside. She didn't look back. Molly followed to the driver's side. She spared me an emotionless, fleeting glance before entering.

I got off easy. Druella had enough strength and power to tear me limb from limb a million times over. A stinging slap was nothing, but I had a feeling the connotations behind it were severe. I was pretty sure Auntie Dru had just disowned me.

Didi, Vicky, myself and the crowd watched as the midnight black limo drove away. The surrounding tension seemed to fade as I cocked my head and turned to my daughter saying, "Officer Didi, I'm in your care."

Holstering her revolver, Didi took out a pair of cuffs but paused as she saw that there were still quite a few cameras still aimed at us. Evidently thinking better, she tucked them back into her belt pouch, and yelled to Vicky,

"Vicky, go back to school!"

"Are you going to arrest him?!"

"I SAID GO BACK TO SCHOOL!" She roared at my grandaughter.

Looking to me in fear, I offered my her a small smile and nod.

"See you later." I mouthed to her and hoped with all my heart that I would.

She gave a small, apprehensive nod in return, looking to Didi and then back to me. I knew she wanted to say more but, it just wasn't the time. We watched as she walked to her VW Bug and left

Did I know that I would see her later for sure? No. But if I didn't, in some small way, I at least got to say goodbye to her.

"Get in the car," Didi grunted as she reached behind and grabbed Winona from my waist.

Her phone then rang as she got in. I could only hear her responses but it sounded like someone told her to take me somewhere. She ended the conversation with a gulp and a nervous "Yes ma'am!"

Didi fixed me with an uneasy glance.

"My director wants to meet you."

Sounded like fun.

We drove in silence for a while, her taking turns here and there. Then there was the famous Bay Area traffic causing us to stop and go.

"Would you have killed that Mantis?" She asked suddenly at a prolonged red light.

Would I have killed her? It was a question I honestly didn't have an answer to. If I thought she was going to kill Didi, then yes I would have, as much as I wouldn't have wanted to. I didn't think Molly was a bad person, but she was loyal to Druella and would do whatever it took to defend her. I was glad things didn't reach that point.

"You're my daughter. As much as you may hate me and as much as you may think otherwise... I do care for you and Vicky." I replied quietly.

My answer seemed to shock her, which in turn, also somehow managed to piss her off. Neither of us said anything else after. Maybe she was re-evaluating her feelings towards me, maybe she was realizing that I didn't want to destroy her family, or hell maybe she thought I was just bullshitting her. I don't know.

A black Volkswagen GLI swerved in front of us causing Didi to slam on the breaks as she cursed roundly. The plates read OPPAI31, whatever the hell that was supposed to mean.

"Maou damn cow drivers!!" She yelled at the car.

"How do you know it's a Holst?"

She pointed at the plate and exclaimed, "Really?!"

"What? What's it suppose to mean?" I asked with a frown.

She sighed deeply and pulled into the adjacent lane while speeding up.

"Look."

I looked out to my side to see a young Holstaurus on her cell phone while applying lipstick. She seemed more engrossed in her conversation and putting on makeup than keeping an eye on the road.

"Oppai means big boobs in Japanese. It's something the cows are proud of." She explained as she accelerated and we passed. There was a slight hint of bitterness in her voice, I could tell there was some kind of past there, but I didn't dare ask.

"Ah." I said simply.

Well now I know... and if you believe what GI Joe says, that's half the battle, kids.

We pulled into the parking basement of a tall, dark gray concrete building with the letters MBI on it and Didi lead to us the elevator, right up to the 8th floor main offices. Walking through, I was met with the stares of various types of Mamono working there. Nekos, Hinezumi's, Minotaur's, Ogres, even a Zombie. At the end of the all the rows of desks was a single closed-in office with the words 'Director' etched on its glass door.

Didi paused and took a nervously deep breath before knocking.

"Enter." Called a gruff, feminine voice.

Inside, a green scaled, gray-haired lizardwoman sat at a large desk. Papers were stacked about its surface, and name plate towards its front read Lisa Proudblade. To her left was a flat screen tuned to CNN on mute. Wanna guess what was the hot news topic of the hour? Yep, a video of Didi, myself, Molly and Druella. She peered to the tv, then to me as if making sure I was the same guy.

"Sit." She ordered after the door closed.

Shrugging, I took a seat on the hard, wooden chair in front. Didi sat to my right as she said, "Director Proudblade, I can explain-"

"Shut up Didi." The lizard woman said harshly as she glared over at her for a second, then back me from across her desk. We sat in silence as she continued to glare at me, then she flipped open a thin manila folder that laid in front of her.

"Donald ————-, age 23, born in —————, Connecticut. About 4 years ago, you were in a car crash that resulted in you being comatose. 2 years after that, you were transferred to a private care facility, owned by Princess Druella, all the way across the country. And now here you are, among the living, claiming to be related to the Royal family and just a few moments ago, involved in an altercation with Druella, herself. Very, very interesting. Mr. ———, there are a thousand questions I have from just this tiny little dossier of you that, coincidentally, I had to call in quite a few favors for because it had been sealed away.

She flipped the folder closed, and regarded me.

"Why was one of my agents at a San Jose McSabbeth's, her weapon pulled on member of Mamono royalty, with you in the middle of it?" She asked me evenly.

I met her eyes and could see the contained anger in them, the only thing keeping this chick from losing it was what I had to say.

"During the time I was in the coma, somehow my consciousness was transferred to the Mamono home world some 100 years ago," I cleared my throat as I could feel my face redden, "Didi here is my daughter, but I never married her mother. There were some... complications in regards to that."

Out of the corner of my eye I could see Didi shift uncomfortably and heard her mumble, "Maou damn it..."

I knew it was embarrassing, her family's dirty laundry being aired out to dry in front of her boss. But there was no other way to explain what had just happened.

"I'm actually married to a Cheshire named Romie who is the only daughter of Misrelda, the Queen of Hearts. At the time, I had been searching for a way back home in Wonderland and stumbled upon a nuke from modern times that had also somehow made its way to that world. Then-"

"Wait," The director interrupted, looking sharply over to Didi then to myself, "What did you say?"

Her voice was strained as if trying to keep herself calm.

"I found a nuke." I answered nonchalantly.

"A nuke." She repeated.

"Yeah... A miniaturized nuclear bomb attached to a missile inside a downed military plane in Wonderland. If I had to guess, it was for a Predator drone."

Funny, I had the same reaction when it all first went down. Now, its old news and water under the bridge.

"A Predator drone." She parroted again.

Quickly jotting down notes on a paper, she said, "I see. Go on."

"Victoria, Didi's mother, was the first Mamono I encountered that didn't try to rape me. She took me in, cared for me, taught me the ways of the world. She was also an unparalleled blacksmith."

I paused, thinking about her. Sadness, sorrow, and tears all threatened to overwhelm me. I swallowed hard, trying to keep myself together. Director Proudblade was watching me like a damn hawk, waiting for me to continue.

"You see, back then, evidently there were quite a number of instances where Travelers, people from other dimensions, visited the world. Romie's dad was one, I was another, and then there was a woman named Colonel Faith, also from my world. She wanted to use the nuke to kill the Maou and revert all the Mamono to their original forms."

"I'm sorry, what?" She asked in disbelief.

"Faith was a Colonel in the US military, I think the Air Force maybe. She had joined sides with The Order and convinced them that getting their hands on the lost bomb would be their salvation. You guys were winning and they were getting desperate, so they agreed. Then they found some old scriptures saying that the Maou is the one that shapes what Mamono are." I leaned forward to make my point, "Kill the Maou and Mamono like you, Lisa Proudblade become blood thirsty, lizard-like killing machines."

She frowned deeply and scowled. She didn't like that.

"Why would she want to do that?"

"The Order wanted the good old times back. You know; vicious, ugly monsters to kill, and the human population firmly under their thumb. Trying to relive them glory days, I guess."

She said nothing at that. I also saw that Didi was staring at me as well. She never knew the whole story, only Vicky did and I guessed she never told her.

"Romie, myself and my incredibly loyal horse, Rudolf, took the bomb to Victoria to help dismantle it. She was the only one I could trust and that had the know-how."

"Why not hide it? Or just give it to the Maou?" Proudblade interjected.

"Faith and her men were hot on my trail, I couldn't hide it. As far as giving it to the Maou... Well I guess you can say I had the foresight not to trust her..."'

She raised an eyebrow to that.

"And yet in your public confession, you claim that you helped her come to Earth. You seem to be contradicting yourself."

I gave her a wry smile. "You're right, but I'm not done yet. Faith and the goon squad breached one of the entrances to Victoria's mountain home, she had some Hero kid with this weird ability. He could project an anti magic field. It screwed with Mamono, their nerves or something. I had to make a choice. Kill them and save the world or... "