At 38, Rosie had just had a fourth miscarriage.
After the last one, she and Paul had been through the entire battery of investigations and treatments cold, hard cash could buy, before their gynaecologist had told them firmly that their only option was adoption.
"But I want Paul's baby," Rosie had sobbed into Samantha's shoulder after the appointment. "Paul's and mine. Like everyone else. Is that so wrong?"
"Of course not," Samantha had soothed, stroking her older sister's blonde hair.
With fifteen years between them, Rosie had been like a second mother to Samantha, who hero-worshipped her big sister. She would have done anything for her and had thought long and hard over the past couple of years about how she could help. She'd taken a deep breath and said, "What about surrogacy? I could carry a baby for you."
Rosie shook her head. "It's sweet of you, but it's no good. The doctors say my eggs aren't viable."
"What about my eggs?" Samantha said. "We're sisters, we have lots of genes in common. Everyone says we look alike. If we used one of my eggs it would be as if it were yours."
"No," said Rosie, with finality. "It wouldn't. And, honestly, Sam, I couldn't watch as my younger, prettier sister carried my husband's baby. What if he decided he wanted you instead? It's not an option." And she had ignored the doctors' advice on the likely effects of a fourth miscarriage on her mental and physical health and gone right ahead and conceived again.
Samantha had thought her ravings about Paul paranoid, crazy talk but on the night of Rosie's fourth miscarriage, as she lay in bed in the dark, her mind racing, she heard the door creak open and felt a weight settle on the mattress. "Rosie?" she whispered.
"No," said her brother-in-law's voice, and his naked body slid beneath the quilt and between her legs. Samantha always slept naked and his hands were on her breasts before she knew it. His tongue forced its way into her mouth and she felt his hard-on nudging urgently at her labia.
"Get the fuck off me!" she whispered forcefully, kneeing him in the groin.
Paul wheezed and rolled off her.
"Jesus, Samantha, was that really necessary? I just thought -"
"You thought what?" repeated Samantha, her voice dripping with sarcasm. "I don't think thought had much to do with it."
He dropped his head into his hands and said, with infinite sadness, "I thought if you were actually carrying our baby - if it was a fait accompli - she would eventually accept it."
Samantha sighed and put her arms around him, ignoring the tightening of her nipples and the wetness between her legs. "She wouldn't," she said, briskly. "But she would divorce your sorry, cheating ass." She kissed him on the forehead and bundled him back off to his wife.
. . .
A week later, Rosie was still dissolving into tears several times a day. Samantha and Paul held whispered conversations about what to do, whether she needed to be assessed by a psychiatrist, jumping apart guiltily when Rosie entered a room so that she looked from one to the other with increasing suspicion.
"You were so right," Paul told Samantha. "She wouldn't just have divorced me. She'd've cut my fucking dick off."
Samantha gave him a watery smile and turned away.
. . .
Paul and Samantha still hadn't reached a conclusion on how Rosie should be handled when the funfair rolled into town. When they were younger, Rosie and Samantha had adored the fair, from coconut shies to blood-curdling rides, from dodgy palmists to dodgem cars. Samantha nagged at Rosie all day until she gracelessly consented to go with her.
They wandered from stall to stall, eating candy floss and popcorn, carrying a ridiculously enormous plush tiger Rosie had won with her prowess at darts. Rosie was smiling for the first time since the miscarriage and Samantha was beginning to feel the stirrings of optimism, when Rosie cried, "Look!" She was pointing at a grubby-looking tent with a sign outside saying, "Fortune Teller and Wise Woman." Samantha felt cold.
"I really don't think that's a good idea," she said, linking her arm through Rosie's and trying to steer her away.
"Why not?" asked Rosie, refusing to budge. She was trying to sound bright, but a single tear rolled down her cheek.
"You know why not," Samantha said, gently. "I don't see how any good can come of it."
"And yet," Rosie snapped, bitterly, "you think good can come of conspiring with Paul to have me sectioned." She shook off Samantha's arm, dropped the huge soft toy and stomped into the tent.
Samantha sat down, resting her back on the tiger, and closed her eyes.
. . .
Rosie emerged twenty-five minutes later, looking peaceful.
"I'm fine," she said. "We just talked. The woman lost a child herself. It was quite cathartic."
Samantha rose and hugged her. "I'm glad," she whispered, and hoisted the tiger in her arms.
Rosie took it from her and put it back down on the grass.
"Your turn," she said.
"Mine?" said Samantha, laughing nervously. "I don't think so."
"She wants to talk to you," Rosie insisted, giving Samantha a little push. Defeated, Samantha opened the tent flap.
The interior of the tent looked much as she would have expected: lit by flickering candle light, draped with filmy scarves, clouds of incense smoke hanging in the air, a table in the centre covered by a cloth fringed by dangling metal discs - but the woman seated behind the table defied her expectations. She did not have big gold, hoop earrings and black curly hair nor did she talk in an exotic accent. She was just an elderly lady with a rigid perm, faux pearls and a cashmere twinset.
"Take a seat, Samantha," she said with no pseudo-mystic preamble.
Samantha sat.
"You must be very worried about Rosie," said the wise woman. Her grandmotherly demeanour invited confidences.
"Yes," said Samantha. "She's so desperate for a baby and she'd be such a great mum. She was to me. I don't know what to do, and neither does Paul. I don't know where we go from here." She had started to cry during this little speech, fat tears rolling down her cheeks and into her mouth.
"Rosie is worried about you and Paul," the old lady said. "You offered to have a baby with him."
"Yes," sobbed Samantha. "I don't fancy him. I just wanted to help. I'll do anything."
"Hmmm, perhaps," said the old woman. "But I think he 'fancies' you, as you put it."
Samantha swallowed her sobs, staring.
"If it's true that you would do anything to help Rosie I may be able to help," the wise woman said. "But it won't be an easy ride for you. Not at all. And Rosie is likely to lose interest in Paul altogether. You might well have to fuck him while she is pregnant, to hold them together."
Samantha gulped. She wasn't sure whether she was more taken aback by this woman thinking she might have a solution to Rosie's infertility, or by her use of the word 'fuck'.
"I'll do anything," she repeated.