Succubus Shenanigans

Someone was fucking with me.

And not in any way that was useful or fun.

I scowled at my empty lunch container, empty for the third day in a row.

"What the hell?" Suzy Q said as she shook her equally empty lunch container. Did she think it was going to magically appear?

Actually, maybe that wasn't so far-fetched, since it had pretty much magically disappeared. I gave my Tupperware a little shake. Nope, still empty.

"This is getting ridiculous," Suzy Q said with a growl, pissed off enough that I heard some of her inner wolf. That meant I needed to calm her down, because the last thing we needed was a full on were-wolf rampage through the break-room kitchen. Even though our particular newspaper didn't hire humans, so there was no one to hide our paranormal secrets from, I didn't really feel like cleaning up the mess afterwards either. I'm pretty lazy unless I've got a good reason not to be.

Like hunting down a lead for a kickass news story or hunting down a new lover to charge myself up.

I'm Kyloria Vain, affectionately known as Kyra to my friends and fuck buddies, and I'm a newspaper reporter in the Big Apple. Oh, and I'm also a succubus. Yeah, I know, way to bury the lead.

I don't really like being a succubus and I do like being a newspaper reporter, so sue me. I mean sure, being a succubus sounds great, hot sex with just about whoever I wanted on demand, but there's a difference between getting to do something and having to do something, such as eating to survive versus eating for pleasure. It's a good analogy, because that's basically what sex is to me: food.

Although, I also have to eat. Food nourishes my physical body, sex nourishes my energy and magic. I'm a pretty weak succubus, though, because I just don't have time for sex all that much - I'm too busy living. I usually manage to get my "one meal a day" from a supernatural source, because humans are more like having a quick snack, so sex with them doesn't benefit me much and, as I said, I'm lazy and I survive on that.

This week, I'm busy trying to figure out who is fucking with me.

Really, they're fucking with the whole office, but if they weren't fucking with me personally I'm not sure I would really care. Actually, it would probably be pretty funny, but I do care that they're fucking with me... and okay, I care that they're fucking with Suzy Q, too. She is my best friend, after all, but since none of it is really harmful, I'd still find it funny that they were fucking with her.

I never said I was a good person. I have my moments though, and I'm a freaking awesome lay. I've had a lot of practice since hitting my magical majority and my succubus side kicking in three years ago when I turned twenty-five. Before that, I'd just had regular demon powers. Kind of wish I still did. It would be a lot easier to feed off nature or emotions, rather than having to get down and dirty for my "food."

Anyway. I can complain about the logistics of being succubus another time, right now, I needed to focus on the problem at hand, because it wasn't as if I was going to magically change into another kind of demon.

"Fuck it, let's go to Benny's and get something there," I said, naming Suzy Q's favorite restaurant and likely the only thing which would distract her right then. It was a little bit out of the way from our office, but whatever... we deserved a longer lunch break. Our food had been disappearing for three days in a row, and nothing management had done had fixed the problem, so I didn't really care if they got pissy about us taking an hour and a half instead of an hour. "Then we can figure out what we're going to do about this."

"Why should we have to do something?" Suzy Q asked, grumbling, although she followed me complacently enough out of the kitchen, kicking at the line of salt drawn across the threshold and scattering it. Our editor, Bill, had put it down thinking the trouble must be the work of an imp. Weak demons such as imps couldn't cross salt. A day or two without any sex at all and I wouldn't be able to either, since I was already starting at a pretty low threshold of power.

"Because whatever they're doing obviously isn't working," I retorted. Hell, we were two ball-busting, headline-writing, best in the news room reporters. We'd both covered everything from murders to political scandals to drug busts and trafficking rings. Figuring out who was stealing food from the break room, makings thousands of copies of hentai babes in the copy room, switching people's desks around in the middle of the night, and in general causing low-levels of mayhem shouldn't be that hard.

I know, I know, famous last words, right?

******

Benny's a little hole in the wall, which normal humans walk right by every day thanks to some pretty fantastic wards done by the warlock owner, Benny Shade. New York has a pretty thriving paranormal community where it's easy to hide right in plain sight. Suzy Q and I worked for the city's only paranormal newspaper, so while we covered the same stories as a lot of the humans do, ours always hit the mystical bent.

Like last year when the city councilman went berserk and murdered his best friend and wife? Well, yes, the two were having an affair— as the humans reported— but that particular city councilman also happened to be a Jinn, and he actually hadn't murdered them. He'd just frozen them in the position in which he'd found them. Like the actual missionary position. They were still alive, just stuck together and unable to move or speak, which was pretty horrifying when I thought too much about it. The Witch Council was still trying to figure out how to undo it, since the Jinn had disappeared right after doing it and normally the only way to undo a Jinn spell is convincing the Jinn in question to fix it.

The human papers had reported on the affair and the unfortunate deaths (staged using the seemingly dead bodies, but the coffins in the graveyard were totally empty), while I'd managed to sneak find out all the dirty details they couldn't, such as how the Lamia, aka the wife, had actually been having multiple affairs, which she'd been using to blackmail various powerful members of the magical community. The man currently frozen with his cock inside of her was the local den leader of the bear shifters (thankfully HE wasn't married, or mated, as shifters did), so that had thrown their whole den into an uproar and Suzy Q had done the piece on that.

The bears still didn't have an official leader, since their alpha was currently unable to answer a formal challenge but wasn't actually dead. The minute he got unstuck, he was definitely going to be facing one, though. The bear shifters were pretty pissed at him, not in the least because he'd been embezzling funds to pay off the Lamia. I still wasn't sure exactly what she'd been blackmailing him for, but as juicy a scoop as that would be, Bill had told us to back off until the den had calmed down. Without a leader to enforce their rules, things could get... violent.

So really, the mystery of who was fucking with our newsroom was way below our pay grade, but it was starting to affect my happiness, which meant it had now moved up to the top of my list of things I on which was motivated to actually work.

Walking into Benny's, the smell of fresh pasta and cheese hit me like a ton of bricks and I nearly moaned. Smells were warded outside, too, because it wouldn't be good to have a bunch of humans wandering around on the street trying to figure out why a seemingly abandoned building smelled liked the best Little Italy had to offer. Beside me, I could feel Suzy Q relaxing as the warmth and friendliness of the place washed over us.

Benny's was always busy, but never fully packed. I'm pretty sure he'd put some kind of spell on it to ensure there was always at least one table open, because sometimes the dining room seemed larger than it did on other days. Not that I could prove anything and I didn't really care to. Warlocks and witches could be really proprietary about their spells.

As a Kitchen Warlock, Benny specialized in making the best damned food in the state, and he always knew what you needed. No menus, because you didn't choose your meal. Benny chose it for you. As far as I was concerned, he was a Kitchen God. Not that I ever said that aloud, didn't want to anger any actual gods or demi-gods.

"I'm so hungry," Suzy Q said, sounding fairly pathetic as she looked at the hostess. The blonde woman smiled.

"Two for lunch?"

"Yes please," I said, eyeing my bestie. Hungry werewolves give a whole new meaning to Hangry, so if we could get our meals before she passed from pathetic to furious, that would be great.

Almost as soon as the hostess sat us down, a waitress whisked by our table and slid two waters in front of us and a plate with a double order of wings between us. Suzy Q's eyes lit up as she immediately grabbed one in each hand and started eating. As I said, Benny always knows what's needed.

Across from us, a table of cute guys in business suits were eyeing Suzy Q with interest. I know, what you're thinking, why are they eyeing a werewolf when she's sitting with a succubus?

Well, for starters, Suzy Q is 5' 9", stacked like a brick shithouse, blonde haired and blue eyed, and basically looks like Barbie come to life. Her waist isn't quite that tiny, but you get the idea. She knows damn well what she looks like, too, and she works what nature gave her: pencil skirts, low-cut blouses, and her carefully done hair and manicure are her normal business outfit. On the weekends or at home, she'll either go for a sexy little sundress or jeans with a tight-fitting top.

I, on the other hand, have very little interest in accenting my natural assets. I'm a succubus, so my 5'6" frame is naturally packed with luscious curves, but I don't usually emphasize them with my clothes. Today I'm wearing jeans and my t-shirt proclaimed me to be the Ravenclaw Quidditch Captain. What? I like Harry Potter, so sue me. I'll put on a dress when I'm on my way to sex (easy access), a wedding, or funeral, and nothing else. It's definitely not the worst shirt I've worn to work. Compared to some of my shirts, this one was downright professional. My long black hair was up in a messy bun on the top of my head and I didn't bother with make-up.

Why would I? If I needed to seduce a man, I just amp up my succubus nature and BOOM, instant erection and unquenchable lust. Well, unless he was legitimately already in love with someone else or had some other kind of protection from my succubus wiles.

I don't need to dress up, so I don't. It takes Suzy Q an hour to get ready every morning, and it takes me 10 minutes to brush my teeth, throw back my hair, and put on some clothes. That's a lot of extra sleep, and I am a lady who values that sleep. Yes, demons sleep. We even dream, although I'd need less sleep if I had more sex, but... whatever.

"Okay," I said, deciding to ignore the guys checking us out. I already had sexy time set up tonight with my regular fuckbuddy, so I didn't need to pick up an extra snack. Plus, I wasn't getting a super energized buzz off of any of them, which meant they probably weren't worth the effort, anyway. I doubted Suzy Q would be interested either; she was more focused on food. "So we know a few things. We now know it's definitely not an imp. It's not one of the other staff and it's not anyone from the cleaning service."

Those had all been the top theories, which had been knocked off one by one. Video cameras had been placed and checked, but nothing showed up on them. We didn't have any ghosts or poltergeists in the building, but Bill had done a cleansing anyway, just in case. All the people in and out of the building on a regular basis showed up on camera. Plus, when things like people's desks were moved around, they just MOVED. Everything switched in a blink. Obviously magic, but wards, counter spells, and witch bags hadn't affected it, which was why "imp" had been everyone's next guess, but salt was a very effective measure against imps and we'd put it across every door and window in the place.

Whoever was fucking with us would have had to cross multiple lines of salt to get to the fridge. Definitely not an imp.

A supercharged imp?

I'd never heard of such a thing. I'm not that old, though, especially for a demon. Twenty-eight is a drop in the bucket... although a lot of demons do die in their first couple hundred years. Not from natural causes. They get cocky and stupid with power and piss off the wrong person or Darwinism gets them.

"Maybe it's someone using magic from outside, just to fuck with us," Suzy Q said, her initial hunger assuaged. Damn, she'd already plowed through half the wings. On the other hand, if she was talking that meant it was safe for me to take one now. I picked one up to nibble on while she ruminated aloud. "We already know witch magic can't ward everything... but why with all of us? That's never happened before, no matter how pissed someone is about a story."

That was true. People rarely targeted the whole paper; they wanted the person who had written the article. That might not be true with regular newspapers, but ours is full of employees who can bite back, sometimes literally. Someone would have to be insanely powerful to think they could take on an entire office of supernaturals.

Whoever was doing this definitely wasn't using insane amounts of power.

"I think we should set a trap," Suzy Q said, stripping the last wing of its meat.

As if on cue, the server appeared at our table again and set down our meals before picking up the wing basket and disappearing again. Mmmm. Stuffed shells in meat sauce for me with a side salad and steak frites for Suzy Q. My mouth watered at the smell of all that heavenly cheese and sauce.

Both of us dug in immediately, moaning as the flavors hit our taste buds.

Perfection.

After a few bites, I picked up the conversation again. "We've already set traps, remember? None of them have worked."

"That's why I think we need to set a real trap, where we're actually there to see what's going on as it happens. The cameras are missing something," Suzy Q said insistently.

Ugh. Sounded like effort.

"Maybe we should suggest it to Bill and he can assign people to keep watch," I countered.

Suzy Q gave me a look. "And when they can't figure out what's going on or they say they have figured out what's going on but there was nothing they could do about it, what are you going to say?"

I sighed. The pasta and cheese must be softening me up, there was no other explanation.

"Fine. It's probably better to just do it ourselves." She had a point about the others anyway. Plus, it was just as likely that Bill would say 'your idea, your responsibility.' "I'm meeting Ryu for dinner though, so it'll have to be after that."

"Make sense," said Suzy Q with a careless shrug. "That way you'll be all charged up, anyway. I think Kyle is usually the last one out of there and he leaves around nine. Think you can be back at the office a little before that?"

I nodded before sighing again.

******

Ryu Lee is a fu dog shifter.

In human form, he's a little over six feet tall, very nicely muscled, with long black hair that brushes his shoulders and which he keeps pulled back in a pony-tail, and tilted almond-shaped eyes that were a warm brown color when he was calm and happy. When he wasn't calm or happy, they turned gold. I got to see them flash gold on a pretty regular basis because he was my only truly regular fuck buddy.

While I could have sex with just about anyone I wanted, I tend to take a more scientific approach.

For one, sleeping around can become really tedious. For a succubus, it's a little bit like taking a gamble. A really powerful being can really charge me up, but not if the sex is less than satisfactory. Better sex with a less powerful entity actually nets better results. Since I try to feed as little as possible, my preference is for a powerful partner who is also amazing in bed.

That would be Ryu. He's a mythical shifter, which are both rare and very powerful, and he's a master of eroticism with a cock that makes my pussy scream with pleasure.

We can't have sex every single day or I'd drain him dry—even as powerful as he is—but he's my main friend with benefits. In between nights with him I have a few others I switch around between visiting, or I go find a one night stand at a local club. I've learned not to get attached, because that's the fastest way to heartbreak.

Sure, fucking a succubus is fun for a while, but she's not who you take home to Mom and most men—I prefer men, although I've been known to swing both ways for an occasional lucky lady—don't want to share long-term. The main reason it's worked so well between me and Ryu for about a year now is because he's a police detective in the homicide department who doesn't have time for a real relationship, and isn't particularly interested in one anyway. One day he'll move on though, and I'll have to find someone else... I'm hopeful we'll be able to stay friends, but I'm guessing that'll depend on the temperament of the person he ends up with.

In the meantime...

"Hello, beautiful," he said, smiling as he opened the front door of his apartment. Sweatpants hung off his lean hips and he was shirtless, showing off a stunning array of sexy muscles.

"Hello, Detective Delicious," I said, eyeballing him as he pranced into the apartment. Out of the corner of my eye I could see him shaking his head as I moved past him; the nickname both amused and embarrassed him.

I set down the wine bottle on the dining room table and smiled as I felt his presence behind me, already sparkly with sexual desire. Sparkles is how my brain interprets sexual interest. I can always feel it, even if I don't touch it or play with it. Ryu was flickering like Christmas lights, probably because he could sense my arousal as well.

Fu dogs are traditionally Chinese protectors and guardians; they look a bit like a cross between a lion and a dragon, and Ryu fit that perfectly. That is probably how he ended up being a cop. He's also highly empathetic, which is part of what makes him such a fantastic lover. He always instinctively knows what I need.

His body pressed up against me from behind, cock already thick with interest and pressing between the crease of my ass, the tip rubbing against my lower back. Two hands flattened on the front of my hips, pulling me back against him as hot breath wafted over my ear.

"So... dinner first, or..." He left the question hanging, even though he already knew the answer.

Obviously, he'd picked up on how out-of-control I was feeling (thanks to the work prankster), and knew I needed a measure of control tonight.

I rocked back against him before spinning around so that his hands were now on my ass, one of my hands sliding down the front of his pants to grip the thick length of his cock.

"Definitely or," I said, my other hand moving up to curve around his neck and bringing him down for a kiss.

He groaned as I touched him, my own sexual nature rising and heating the air around us with lust, and I could feel his cock become even harder in my hand, like a rod of steel. I pumped my hand up and down, and our tongues danced together as my pussy creamed in anticipation.

Pulling away from the kiss, I gave his dick one final stroke before pulling my hand away.

"Couch. Now."

The smile he gave me was almost lazy. "Bossy. I like it."

Then he surprised me by picking me up. I squealed a little in surprise, laughing as I wrapped my legs around his hips. Leaning down, I kissed him again, sliding my fingers into the thick strands of his hair and messing up his ponytail a little bit. Eh, fuck it, I liked to play with his hair, anyway.