Thank you for your continued patience and support. I am still writing and as I said in my update; I'm trying to find that work, social life and writing balance so the chapters aren't coming as fast. I am however, getting there. To those of you who asked specific questions, I promise to reply to them very soon. Once again; thanks to all of you.
Oh one more thing- Remember that Reese and Giovanni are the same person.
Alex looked over at Giovanni and smiled. He had finally accepted the fact that she, Edgar and Marco were now his family. There was one thing that concerned her. There was an air of anxiety about him that hadn't been there before. He tried to hide it, but it was there. She tried to think of when it began and realized that it had started once he had fully accepted them as family. The smile on her face vanished as she thought about the possible consequences of that anxiety. It had been centuries since he had allowed himself to truly care for anyone and the emotion was new to him. There was the possibility that he wouldn't be able to focus as well because he would be too concerned about their safety. Accepting them as family had become a double edged sword.
"You are thinking," Giovanni said pulling her close to him. "Tell me what concerns you."
She was going to say "nothing", but changed her mind. It would do none of them any good if she didn't address her concerns.
"I'm glad that you accepted the fact that you're stuck with us," she said kissing his cheek. "But I think that it's a double edged sword."
"How so?" Giovanni asked kissing her back.
"I sense an anxiety..."
"I'm fine," he interrupted.
"Let me finish," Alex said as she sat up. "It's been a long time since you had a family and I'm worried that you'll be too concerned about keeping us safe to fully focus."
She paused giving him a chance to respond. When he didn't, she continued.
"I know that part of your guilt about the past is that you couldn't protect your family. I understand and sympathize with that. I felt the same thing about my husband. But this is different. This isn't some unknown disease or something out of our control. We know who we fight against and all of us are more than capable of protecting ourselves and each other. The hard part is going to be you remembering that. You have to trust that we can and will keep each other safe. We need you to be what you've always been-our sometime pain in the ass leader. We need you to trust us as we trust you."
Giovanni didn't reply for a long time. He had been wondering when Alex would bring the topic of his anxiety up. She was right he realized. He had to trust them and this was a completely different scenario. He wasn't the only one that couldn't protect his family back then. Millions had lost loved ones to what was now being called the bubonic plague. That knowledge had done little to soothe him then and it did little to soothe him now.
Even now, if he had to choose; he would have choosen to die with his family. That feeling had nothing to do with how he felt about Alex. He loved her. He would die for her and he was grateful that he had her. It had everything to do with his perception of failure. But that was neither here nor there. The issue was his anxiety. Alex was right. He was afraid that he couldn't protect them. That fear was something that they didn't need.
"You're right," he said softly.
"You agree?" Alex asked surprised by the way the conversation was going.
"Yes... and thank you for saying something. I needed to hear it although I already knew it. I don't know how to go about calming this anxiety."
"Giovanni- you are a leader. Step into that role. You set the guidelines which will help us keep ourselves and each other safe. In a way you have to stop thinking of us as family."
"Too late for that," Giovanni grumbled and fell silent.
****
"One month," Jean murmured under her breath as she looked at the menu for the ball. It really hadn't changed much. The updated menu included a wedding cake and some things that were favorites of the bride to be Joy Martinez.
Jean amongst many others was curious about her. To date no one had really seen her and those who had kept their mouths shut. That led to speculation as to what she looked like. Those who really disliked Cristiano hoped she was as ugly as possible. Others didn't care about what she looked like. Like Jean, they were very curious about her as a whole.
Jean looked up from the notes and closed her eyes. Edgar was still being held captive and they still hadn't seen him in spite of the promises that they would. On more than one occasion she was tempted to call her father despite the warnings from the vampire that held him and her husband Lewis. To some degree, she held Lewis responsible for Edgar's captivity. Had he accepted him as his son and not pushed him away because of his sexual preference, he would be safe and sound at home where he belonged. The urge to call her father returned and just as she was about to give in to the urge; Lewis walked in.
"Who are you calling?" he asked his voice tight with suspicion. "I hope that you weren't going to call your father."
Her silence was his answer.
"What the fuck?" he growled. "The gala is back on. This thing is coming to an end and yet you think about jeopardizing Edgar's life by calling your father. We were promised that we would see him soon and yet..."
"Soon?" Jean snapped angrily. "That promise was made over a week ago and have we heard anything? No and I'll tell you why- he has no intentions of keeping his word! It's his way of keeping us in line."