Monster Girls: a Headless Booty

Lucas groaned and sat up. He was laying on the floor of his living room, the contents of his kitchen table strewn around him. Something had happened and he had fallen out of his chair, knocking the entire table over in the process.

"Hi there!" A girl's voice called from above him.

"Huh?" He looked up.

She was a wide-hipped girl with a cute nose and curious eyes. They had amber irises and black sclera, an incredibly strange look to be sure. She was wearing a shorty black skirt that only reached partway down her thighs and had a thick ruffling to it. Above that was a black hoodie with her hood drawn up. Her body was curvy and incredible. Average breasts led down to a fair waist and then her hips widened out into a cloth-stretching backside of glorious proportions. From his angle on the floor, he could see right up her skirt to her lacy black thong.

"I've come for you." She said, her hands clasped in front of her.

"Wow, you've got a big ass!" Lucas exclaimed upon seeing her, his eyes as big as the booty he was trying to see.

Whaaat?!" She squealed, "No I don't! It's not that big..." She stammered and fumed, her hands going back to hold her skirt against her plump rear.

"Are you kidding me? You look like one of those Brazilian porn stars to me! You've got this cute, flat waist and then your hips just round out into..." Lucas said, scooting forward on his knees. He wrapped his arms around her hips and dug his fingers into her plush bottom. It was indeed sizable and it felt as soft as clouds when he groped it. He barely had the coherent thought to keep his hands on the outside of her skirt. As though that made his groping any less perverse. His cheeks flushed as he hummed, "Yea... So perfect!"

"Get off! I've come for your soul!" She squealed, pushing him back. She helped her hands out and a black scythe appeared in her hands. She brandished it at him, "So please stop touching me!" Her face blushed from his molesting.

"What? Where the hell did that scythe come from?" Lucas yelped and scooted back.

"I am a Dullahan and you are dead... Well... You will be dead soon. I'm here to collect you and take you to purgatory." She said, raising her scythe.

"Wait! What happened? How did I die?" He asked urgently, scrambling to his feet.

The Dullahan set the butt of her scythe on the ground and fished in her hoodie pocket. Out came a black leatherbound pocket book and she flicked it open. Her scythe stood up of its own accord as she started to flip the pages, "Well... you had a stroke. You survived, but only barely. Soon, your body will have another and will expire in..." She pulled back her sleeve to look at her watch, "Fourteen minutes. Without any help, your body is doomed."

"What but my body is fine! I'm fine!" He patted his chest and looked pleadingly up at her.

"Doesn't look fine to me." She pointed next to him.

He looked down and yelped in shock. Laying on its side next to him was his own body. He hadn't noticed it for the cute, big-butted Dullahan in front of him. Sure enough though, it was him. He knew himself well. He wasn't a spectacular looking man, but he had a strong chin and an agile swimmer's body. He leaned over and tried to touch himself.

His hand went right through.

"What the fuck?" He yelled.

"You are a spirit, a soul outside your body. You no longer have the strength to remain inside it and so you're fading away."

"How did I touch you then?" Lucas asked, his eyes flitting down to her hips again.

"I am neither dead nor alive, and I can interact with both. Now, if you would come along, we could be in purgatory in short order." She picked her scythe back up and held out a hand.

"No, come on! Give me a chance! I'm young, I swim, I try to eat right! How is it fair that I'm having a stroke?!" Lucas said, shaking his head. He looked at his body and then back to her, "Come on, there's got to be something you can do!"

"Look, it's not my decision. But under the Death Accords it is stated that you may challenge me for your soul. I pick the contest." She crossed her arms, "Nobody has ever beaten me before."

"Okay, if you're so confident then if I win, you have to sleep with me!" Lucas grinned, his heart rising at the chance he was being given. She started at the words and her face flushed. She seemed a little like a naive school girl about the subject.

"I... You... Whatever. We will play a game of riddles. First one to answer wrong loses." She sighed, shaking her head, "We'll start simple. What is the one thing in life you can never see with your own eyes."

Lucas raised an eyebrow and crossed his arms. He wasn't bad at riddles. This could work. A glance around brought the answer easily, "Your own face."

"Very good. Now ask me one." She nodded.

"A box without hinges, key or lid, yet inside golden treasure is hid." He said with a smile.

"Egg. Very old riddle, I wrote it myself, you know." She chuckled.

"What? No, you didn't." He scoffed at her.

"I'm six hundred and thirteen. I wrote that when I was just a little girl. How about this; hands but no fingers, a face but no eyes. Yet, all men do I hold sway."

"Erm... Well..." He looked about. The clock said he had ten minutes left. Things were getting a little close. Then he realized, "A clock! Hands and face, limited time is what all men have!"

"Very good." She nodded.

"Alright... Riddles... Riddles." He smiled as he remembered a book he had read recently. Maybe it would trick her too? He looked into her eyes, "Why did the dead baby cross the road?"

"What...?" She looked at him in surprise.

"Why did the dead baby cross the road?" He said again, a feel of elation coming over him. It was going to work!

"What kind of a riddle is that!? That doesn't make any sense! That's not fair!" She whined, holding her hands out.

"Come on, what's your answer?" He was smiling from ear to ear.

"I don't know... It's mother was on the other side." She groaned.

"It was stapled to the chicken!" He laughed triumphantly, "You claim to be six hundred years old, but you've never picked up a Steven King novel? Come on! The riddle game with the mad train Blaine. That's how the gunslinger won!"

"Oh... Damn it!" She cursed and waved her scythe in his direction. He felt himself being dragged to the ground. Everything went black for a moment and then he opened his eyes, his real eyes. He shoved himself upright with a whoop.

"Alright! Yay! I'm alive again!" Lucas cheered. His head throbbed in pain and he swayed here he stood. It passed a moment later and he smiled once more.

"Stupid. Well I'll remember that for the future in case anyone tries to trick me with it again. Hope you have a good life." She started towards the door, scythe disappearing in a puff of black smoke.

"Hold on." He grabbed an edge of her skirt and pulled her back a step, "Our deal."

"Oh darn it. I was hoping you'd forget." She pouted, turning around.

"First. What is your name?" He said, his eyes lingering in her hips once more.

"I am Dullahan Elizabeth Francesca Jouliana. Call me Liz." She sighed, crossing her arms, "Once we do this, I'm not speaking to you ever again. Not unless you are dead and I am dragging you to hell."

He wrapped an arm around her waist and pulled her against him, hand pressed to her big round rear, "Oh I very much doubt that." He suddenly pressed his lips to hers and kissed her passionately. She was so startled that she jerked back and her head fell off. It tumbled into her hood and she backpedaled from him.

"How dare you kiss me!" Her voice was muffled inside her hood. She was considerably less scary without her head on. A soft silvery black smoke seemed to emanate from her neck and connect to her head. She pulled her head from her hood and fitted it back on her neck, ruffling her curly brown hair in the process.

"You look like you haven't had a good kiss in a long while and I just couldn't resist those rosy lips." He said sweetly and a blush crossed her angry face.

"Fine. Let's just get it over with." Liz said, reaching for the bottom of her sweatshirt.

"Hey now, don't be in such a hurry. Let's have some dinner first." Lucas said, grabbing her hand to stop her from stripping.

"What? Really? Why?" She sounded surprised, her eyebrows raised and her hands hanging in front of her. He nodded and went to the fridge.

A half hour passed, Liz standing awkwardly in the living room of Lucas's small apartment while he hummed away in the kitchen, cooking something for dinner. Her mind was trying desperately to puzzle everything out. This strange young man didn't want to die, understandable, and he wanted to have sex with her, curious, but he was a virile young guy. He had bested her in a contest through trickery, won his soul back and had even won a chance to sleep with her. She was so certain he couldn't win, mainly because nobody had in six centuries of her life and so she didn't care about the terms he had suggested. She had struck it out as an impossibility and was now dealing with the consequences. As a Dullahan, she was bound by her agreement.

Now she was nervous and impatient. She hadn't had sex in over a century, there wasn't much for an assistant of death to sleep with, so there was some tiny little part of her that actually looked forward to mating with this random guy. But it had been so long that she was actually worried about how she would do, or if it would be enjoyable for either of them.

Most of all though, she didn't understand why he just didn't do it already. He won, he should be taking her. Had culture really changed that much in a hundred years?

"I hope you like spaghetti and meatballs." His voice snapped her out of her thoughts. He was setting plates on the table and a delectable scent had wanted over to her. He was even lighting a few candles.

"Why don't we just do it already and be done!?" She exclaimed, staring at him as he pulled out a chair for her.

"While I am a first class perv for nice ass, that doesn't mean I have no manners at all. You're a guest in my house and its dinner time. Come, have a seat." Lucas gestured to the chair.

"Oh." She was honestly gobsmacked at his honor and damn near chivalrous attitude. If it wasn't for the whole sex thing looming over them, she'd probably be enjoying herself. She sat down and stared at the plate of spaghetti. It looked unbelievably fantastic, like five-star restaurant fantastic.

"Dig in, I don't often get to cook for anyone else outside of work. I love doing it when I can." Lucas said, taking his own seat.

She picked up her fork and tried a bite. A tsunami of flavors washed over her palate, sharp and delicious. Just the right amount of seasoning in the sauce. The noodles were springy but not overdone. It was easily one of the best foods she had eaten in her entire unlife. Without even leaving enough time to swallow, she stuffed a meatball in her mouth and gave a throaty moan of pleasure. The meat was seared to perfection on the outside and so tender and juicy in the inside. The flavor was beyond anything she had ever experienced.

"Good?" He looked at her as she stuffed her face.

"I've never had anything like it. This is amazing." She cried through a stuffed mouth.

"Well give it a minute, it'll still be there when you're done chewing." He smirked, cutting a meatball in two and eating a piece. Her face blushed and she stared down at her hands. He had hit her deepest embarrassment in one: she was an extremely ravenous eater and very ashamed of it. Especially because, as a Dullahan, she didn't even need to eat. Part of the reason she had such a plush ass, and was sensitive about it, was that it always went right to her hips.

After swallowing and taking a drink of water, she looked up at him, "How can you possibly be such a good cook? Your file showed that you cook for a soup kitchen. You must make such a meager living there, you could be rich running a restaurant with this kind of food." She took another large bite.

"Who deserves good food more? Rich snobs who feel entitled to it or folks down on their luck and just happy with a warm meal? I make due with what I can because my food brings smiles to those that need it most." Lucas said with a surprisingly humble attitude.

They talked while they ate, they talked until the plates were empty and the sun dipped below the horizon. The candles burned slowly down in their stands. Liz found herself enchanted by this man. An almost impossible contradiction of reality. A first class perv and completely shameless about his love of her plush ass, but also noble and selfless. For the first time she could remember, she felt very nearly regretful about whom she had almost taken to purgatory. That was a new thing to her, because it had always been a job, she was always just ferrying souls where they needed to go.

But if she had taken Lucas, she would be depriving the world of so much good. She would be taking smiles from so many homeless and needy, she would be doing so much harm by letting him die. She would've never gotten to taste his cooking!

Lucas was just enjoying the company in his home. He hadn't had a girlfriend in a long time, and hadn't had sex in what felt like an eternity. Women just didn't seem to like to be around him, or at least he didn't know how to make them interested in him when he tried.

By the time the candles had burned to nubs and it was well past darkness outside, Liz couldn't look away from him. So when he rose from his chair, she did the same and she grabbed his hand. Her lips met his before he could speak and she kissed him deeply. As he fell into the kisses, she pulled him back towards the couch. She sat down on it and laid back, pulling him with her until she was laying flat and he was on top of her. They kissed and kissed until he began to wonder if she was trying to eat him along with his spaghetti.

"Lucas, when this day started, when I came here, I never imagined this would happen." She breathed as she reached for her hoodie. She pulled it free and her head fell into the crook of her arm. At the moment, she didn't seem to care much about replacing it and he found it equal amounts unnerving and intriguing.

"Well, you did lose the bet." He smirked, taking off his own shirt as he eyed her bouncy bare breasts. She hasn't been wearing anything under the thick black hoodie.

"No... Lucas... I'm talking about... I..." She was red-faced and the flickering dim candlelight hid most of her features in shadow. She squirmed a bit and bit her lip, "Lucas, I'm in love with you."

His eyes went straight to her head sitting on her arm. "Really? Nobody has ever said that before. Are you sure? I might've cooked the spaghetti wrong. Did you eat a bad meatball?" She shook her head with a soft smile and he immediately leaned down and gave her severed head a fresh, deep kiss. He kind of lost himself in it and before he knew it, he was sitting at the foot of the couch, cradling her head in his arms and meeting each of her passionate kisses with his own.

"Well... If you still want to..." Liz said as her body lifted her skirt to show her black lace.

"Oh, yes! Sorry! This is all a bit strange! Exciting though!" He laughed, putting her head back on her neck.

"Don't worry. I like it. Kind of intimate in a special way when its just my head." Liz smiled, spreading her pale legs wide.

"That is so weird to hear." He said, his eyes fixed on her crotch and his dick grew even harder. The thong looked so sexy with how the front cupped her nethers and curved between her thighs

"So, are you going to take yours off?" Liz said and he broke his eyes away from her body.

"Yes! Right! Sorry! You've got really cute panties. Was enjoying it entirely too much." He stripped his pants and boxers quickly. The candles blew out finally and all Liz could see was the faint light of the moon on his back. He crawled back onto the couch and kissed her anew, hands exploring her curves and caressing her breasts while he did so. "Would you mind turning around?"

"What?" She asked in confusion.

"Your butt. I wanna see it." He smiled.

"Oh, jeez. I can't believe you." She pouted as she turned over and put her knees under herself, "Okay, but I wanna be able to see your face when we do it."

"Sure, that's easy." He grabbed her head and turned it around so she was staring up at her own thong-strung bottom. His hands slid up over the soft, pale flesh of her ass.

"Lucas! You know what I meant." Liz fumed, her dark eyes glaring at him. The glare wouldn't last long though, as he ran a finger up the center of her panties. His finger passed smoothly over her wet pussy, only thin lace separating them, and she quieted immediately. Her eyes widened and she tried not to let out any sounds by pressing her lips together tightly.

"Just this time, since I won." He smiled, his thumb softly rubbing the folds of her pussy through her damp panties.

At this point, there was no denying him and she gave a short moan, "Okay! But next time, I want to be able to hold you!"

"Deal." He smiled and grabbed the band of her panties. In all the porn he had seen, all that he had jerked off to in front of his computer had not prepared him for how glorious her bare naked ass would be. Even in the dark, he could see how perfect it looked. He put his hands to it and she let out a shuddering breath. It was smooth and squishy under his fingers as he caressed her entire glorious booty, no thong marring the sight.

His hands slid inward and his thumb brushed over her bare pussy lips. She jerked in surprise and almost leapt of the couch.

"Don't be so jumpy. I'm not gonna bite..." He leaned down and ran his tongue up her slit, "Not much at least."

"Oooohh... It's been a hundred years at least. I can't even properly remember the last." She cooed as pleasure tingled through her. His tongue flitted between her folds and slipped into her. She moaned and grabbed the arm of the couch. Her back arched and she started down at her own ass, and Lucas's face buried in her.

"Well, then let's not delay you any longer." He got up, scooted forward and lined his dick up with her wet pussy.

"Now, that's not what I meeeeaaaaaaannntt~!" She cried loudly, jerking upright. Her head came toppling from her shoulders and down to rest right on her plush ass. Only half of his dick was inside her at the moment and her separated head was panting and drooling on her butt. "Oh fuck that feels good. You're lucky I'm so wet."

"Don't worry, there's still more." He said, holding onto her hips as he slid more of his dick inside.

"More?! Oh by Death, you're huge!" She cried out, her eyes desperately trying not to roll back in her head due to the wild flood of pleasure.

"Here, watch." He scooped up her head and held it in one hand as he caressed her butt with the other. She couldn't help but stare as he slipped deeper. He both looked and felt as big as a horse as he bottomed out inside her. She moaned and her body clung onto the arm of the chair. He pulled back with an aching slowness.

"Darkness, you're destroying my little pussy. It feels far too good." Liz moaned and she wrapped her lips around his finger, sucking on it out of some perverse instinct.

"How can I not? Your ass is the best. I wish you could feel it how I do!" He groaned as he sank inside her again. Her soft flesh enveloped him and heat flooded his dick. Her lust ran down his legs in hot streams, she was inhumanly warm and wet inside.

"Ohhh... 'uck... I... I'm cummin~!" She moaned around his fingers in her mouth and her body clenched up in powerful convulsions. Nearly a century of pent up need flooded over him, both literally and emotionally. He could somehow feel her orgasm and he couldn't handle it. His own orgasm rushed through him, causing a thick load of spunk to fill Liz's burning cunt. They cried and moaned together before she went limp beneath him and he fell back against the other arm of the couch, her head cradled in his arms.