What will
our children do in the morning?
Will they wake with their hearts wanting to play,
the way wings
should?
Will they have dreamed the needed flights and gathered
the strength from the planets that all
men and women need to balance
the wonderful charms of
the earth
so that her power and beauty does not make us forget our own?
I know all about the ways of the heart - how it wants to be alive.
Love so needs to love
that it will endure almost anything, even abuse,
just to flicker for a moment. But the sky's mouth is kind,
its song will never hurt you, for I song those words.
What will our children do in the morning
if they do not see us
fly?
-Rumi
***
I watched the maids and the guards arranging the nursery room for our baby while knitting a tiny moss green cap -yes knitting was a new hobby that I picked up. One more month and the baby would be delivered to this world. Vidor believed that the baby would be a boy whereas I could care less what it would be. A boy or a girl, it wouldn't make any difference as I would love them as much as I loved their father. And because of that Vidor and I came up with a list of names for each gender. It was so much fun. Each one of us wrote on different papers and showed them to each other and crossed the names that sounded too ridiculous and came up with even more ridiculous names.
Initially I wanted the nursery room to be in our room, but Lorant advised it wouldn't be a good idea since the Tenebrian custom is to have a separate room for the baby. We finally reached a conclusion that the nursery room would be adjacent to the master bedroom with a connecting door, so if anything happened Vidor and I would be there within a blink of an eye. Well, it would probably only Vidor who would accomplish that as he could move inhumanly fast.
The painters had done a great job with the walls that were now covered in soft, dusty apricot color and one wall covered with a colorful mural. I was watching a servant assembling the white royalty baby crib when Marsila, my personal maid, appeared to inform me that my uncle was present, uninvitedly, and waiting for me in the reception hall. My heart skipped a beat. Vidor was gone for a confidential matter and would not return until the evening. Anger filled my heart and I decided to change into a rather bold dress to meet Martinien.
I walked to the closet and chose a long sleeve blood red dress to emphasize that I had the power in my hands, and it did give me the desired psychological effect that no one, not even Martinien, wouldn't be able to see: confidence. After all, I had enough hatred in my heart towards him that confidence wouldn't come that hard to me. After Marsila done my hair in a bun and put an intricately designed onyx necklace on, I walked out the door followed by 2 guards. When I finally reached the door to the reception hall, I took a deep breath, straightened my back and nodded at the guard to open the double door. I walked in and saw Martinien casually lounging on a low couch, sipping on a cup of wine with food and fruits spread on the low table.
He saw me and lowered his wine cup, while still lazily lounging, to greet me,
"Ah Clara, my favorite niece! You are more beautiful than the last time I saw you!"
I stood by the table in front of him and nodded at him,
"Martinien."
He raised an eyebrow, clearly didn't expect my cold return and addressing him with his name.
"Well, why don't you sit down? We have a lot to catch up, sweetie."
He smiled at me and I cringed inward. I returned his gaze coldly,
"The King won't return until tonight. I will order for a room to be ready for you since you came here uninvited. How long do you intend to stay here?"
His assessing gaze annoyed me greatly that I had to force myself not to clench my hands. Martinien leaned over to grab a handful of almonds as if he owned the place,
"Oh I intend to stay as long as I need to. No need to rush anything. Why don't you sit down and tell me about your well being here, sweetie. I see that you are pregnant now. Congratulations."
He lifted his cup in salutation.
A mocking gesture
. I was aware of him dodging my remark on his uninvited arrival. Ignoring his attempt to lure me into a conversation that might end up in me grabbing a silver plate and smash his face with it, I cooly responded,
"I have a lot of tasks to attend to. Please make yourself comfortable. A guard will show you your room."
His cynical smile appeared on his face and the silver plate idea was replaced with the urge to grab a sword and stab him in the heart right there.
"Like a queen, you are,"
"I'm sure you've heard of my inauguration and yes I AM a queen. Now if you'll excuse me."
I slightly nodded at him without waiting for his response and turned around. I could feel his burning gaze on my back as I walked towards the doors. Once the doors closed I ordered a guard to inform a maid to prepare the guest room for Martinien, and to keep his eyes on him and don't let him out until Vidor arrive. The guard bowed down and left. I walked back to my room -ascending 7 flights of stairs was quite a task especially in my condition, but the guards who walked me were really patient. The people had changed their attitude towards me once my pregnancy was announced and made public, and now every Tenebrian was ecstatic about the upcoming arrival of the baby.
Once I got into my room I couldn't stop pacing back and forth, thinking of Martinien's motivation in coming to Tenebris. What would he say? What would he do?
What did he want?
The nerves he had to come here! Marsila went into the room and asked if I wanted to dine with my uncle. I shook my head,
"No, Marsila. He must dine in his room and I will dine here. And please refrain from calling him 'my uncle'. 'The guest' will be sufficient."
I saw Marsila looked at me in amusement and for the first time I saw her smile. She bowed and left the room momentarily to inform whoever outside about my order. She then returned to help me bathe myself and changed my clothes. She was about to take an emerald green dress but I refused and told her I wanted the black dress that I wore on the inauguration dinner of me being a queen. It was a beautiful long sleeve black velvet dress with intricate golden embroidery started from the high collar, down right below my chest in V shape. I felt it was the perfect dress for the occasion as I knew I would have to see him again tonight. Marsila nodded in agreement.
When I walked outside the closet I saw Vidor already sitting down on the low couch with the food spread on the low table. He stood up and reached to hug me once Marsila was out. He released his embrace to look at me up and down.
"Beautiful."
I smiled and tiptoed to kiss him.
"Thank you, my love."
He held my hand and guided me to the low couch and started filling the plate.
"Vidor,"
He nodded,
"Yes, I know he is here,"
"You do?"
He looked at me briefly before returning his attention to the half full plate,
"You keep forgetting that there is nothing out of my watch,"
"Oh. Yes. I'm sorry."
He put the plate on his lap and softly kissed on my lips,
"You should stop saying sorry for anything that is not your mistake."
I bit my lower lip and he raised his eyebrows at me,
"Well?"
"well okay, I'm sorry."
He smiled.
