Act Three: There's Always Room
Chapter Four: Ask Me to Enter
"…God damn, woman," Yves was crying out, "how do you always
do that
?"
The morning sun threw strange shadows in the doorway. Ursula shrugged, opened the door wide and stepped aside. "Come into my parlor."
"Very funny," Yves grumbled, crossing the threshold and barging into Ursula's living room. "Oh, wait," he said, glancing at the antique French settee and matching oaken end tables, "this really is a parlor." He tapped a thoughtful rhythm on a lace-covered tabletop. "Doilies, even."
Ursula stood in front of a glass display case full of porcelain dolls. "I've never invited you to tea?"
Yves eyes watered from the patchouli incense and a lemony, astringent smell lingering in the air. "You have," he said, blinking. "I've always had to RSVP in the negative for…varying reasons."
Ursula waved a hand at the homey clutter of her living room. "You think all of this is affectation."
Yves pursed his lip and whistled through his teeth a bit. He espied a purple kitchen glove poking out of Ursula's sweatpants pocket. "You don't have a cat," he eventually said. He folded his arms, a gesture both defiant and protective. "Rooms like this are supposed to have cats in them."
Ursula smirked. "Black cats?"
"Maine coon cats," Yves countered. "One named Alabaster and the other Fusspot. This isn't a witch's parlor. It's my grandmother's."
Ursula laughed hard enough to snort through her nose. The tension in Yves' shoulders melted and he folded himself onto the settee. "Sorry," he sighed, "it's been a long night."
"Fuck the tea," Ursula said, her smile warm, "what about a hot toddy?"
"Only if it's a coffee toddy and not warm milk. I'd pass out."
"I'll grind some beans," Ursula said. Her bunny slippers scuffed the floor as she moved into the kitchenette. "Any roast preference?"
"Ursula, the only coffee I have in my apartment is made from instant crystals."
"That would be a 'no,' yes?"
"Yes," Yves called, peering into the kitchenette before settling into the settee, one arm draped over his forehead.
The coffee grinder grumbled and an undercurrent of freshly ground coffee added to the complex, reeking bouquet in the air. "Quit trying to smother it," Yves said. "I know already."
Ursula stopped puttering in the kitchen. "Know what?"
"You had sex with Galatea."
Ursula stumbled out of the kitchen, tripping over bunny-ears. "How did you—"
Yves sat up. "You've taken the day off…to clean. You're taking excuses to use every classic masking scent in the book. And your bed linens are hung out to dry in your kitchen. Either Galatea's gotten busy in your bed or you broke your hookah and got bongwater everywhere."
"What are you," Ursula said, "Sherlock Holmes?"
"No. Holmes was bi."
Ursula stared for a second before scuttling back into the kitchenette. "I'm going to use more brandy."
"Good idea."
* * *
The solitary nanogasm burst against Dee's inner thigh and vanished faster than a top quark in a particle accelerator, a split-second lightning kiss barely strong enough to trigger a single nerve ending in Dee's skin. The surface of the green serum filling the tub remained placid and dead. Dee closed his eyes, trying to remember the first time Galatea told him about nanogasm.
["…One sperm makes one nanomek replication…"]
"Please, Galatea." Dee's voice rang, amplified by the porcelain tub. "Come back to me if you can." The thin lime liquid stuck to his skin and congealed into scum as it cooled. Caught in reverie, listening to Galatea's technobabble pillow-talk in his head, Dee felt no urge to wipe it away.
["…One replication gives me one nanogasm and produces two more nanomek—at least two, more if you really get 'em turned on…"]
A cluster of nanogasms trilled against his thigh in a sudden, brief salvo before the brackish bathwater fell inert again. Dee smiled, his eyes still shut. "I bet you thought I was going to say, 'but only if you want to.' What did you call me? 'Sensitive and enlightened and stuff.' Well, add 'selfish' to that list. I don't want you back only if you want to come back. I just want you, period."
["…which combined with three more sperm gives me three more nanogasms and produces six more nanomek, which gives me nine more nanogasms and, well…"]
The next flurry of nanogasms arrived quicker and stronger than the last, zipping over Dee's skin like dozens of marching, electric ants. The
ripple-tickle-tingle
abated, petering out like the last few superheated kernels of popping corn, before surging in a cascade of strengthening waves thrilling Dee down to the bone. His eyes flew open and he cried out in uncontrollable laughter. "Galatea!"
["…after a few minutes of that I'll be back in shape…"]
The green syrup between his legs fizzed and radiated warmth in a room-temperature-but-rising boil. "I love you, Galatea! I—
Whoa.
"
["…and hot and horny as Hell. Literally…"]
Thousands of nanogasms ran rampant into Dee's crotch.
* * *