Allow me to introduce myself I am the Genie. That's right that Genie, the one from the lamp. After tens of thousands of years, we have been released from our bonds and allowed to roam the world as free creatures. Some like me have become comfortable in our surroundings and have remained our lamp homes.
Now if you have the misfortune to come across my home and the audacity to disturb me, you will not get three wishes as of days of yore. In the modern world if you summon me from my lamp if you live you will become my slave. As a warning to all I will now relate to you what happened to the last poor soul who disturbed me.
I was still enjoying the slumber of a nice hundred-year nap when I was aroused by an irritating scratching on my walls. In a rage, I stormed from the spout of my lamp in a cloud of smoke.
"Who is the mortal who disturbs me?"
The easiest way to describe this cretin is only to say he was wearing polka dot shorts and sandals with black socks. He was carrying a device I knew to be a metal detector and he was wearing the goofiest smile I'd ever seen.
"My name is Rashid and I found you with my CB2000 metal detector. When do I get my three wishes?"
I stroked my beard as I thought about what I would do with this worm. Should I vaporize him on the spot, or maybe turn his toy into a real CB2000 and lock it on his genitals until they rot. Maybe I should have some fun with him first.
"Oh you'll get what's coming to you but first you must answer some questions. Are you married and is your wife at home?"
He said yes to both questions and I told him his wife had to be in on the wishes and to take me to her.
"Are you going to have sex with my wife? I've always had a fantasy of my wife having sex with a big strong man while I watched helplessly."
Now I was interested, it has probably been two thousand years since I last got laid so his proposition had some merit to it, besides I could always screw the wife and then turn them both to sand. I went back to my lamp and Rashid took me home to his wife.
With a man such as Rashid I wasn't expecting much from his wife but like I said it had been a long time. To my surprise she was quite striking, Rashid told me the inequalities were due to an arranged marriage. as I sat to tea I listened to them quibble over what they wanted from the 'Magic Genie.' I had heard enough, besides my thoughts were turning to the erotic. I put a sleeping spell on the husband and then taking the wife by the hand I walked to their bedroom. I told her as we walked,
"Your husband's first wish is for me to make love to you."