Blood & Carrots Ep. 21

"Why don't we revisit my favorite sheep?" I hum the words playfully, eager to pull the story away from the talk of death.

I wag a finger and wink. "Seeing lady Lorelai in a swimsuit was something I had dreamed about since our first night together. I knew when she said we were going to a tropical island for our vacation, I would finally have my chance..."

#

"I won't!" Lorelai crossed her arms over her chest stubbornly.

I pursed my lips and gave her a pout while holding up the small hanger with the blue two-piece swimsuit on it. "Come on... you would look amazing in it!" I spoke the words with a grin, my little tail flicking.

The sheep shook her head and I saw she had her heels dug in on the subject. "N-no... my body type is far too pudgy for such a thing."

My cheeks puffed out as I gave her a fussed look. "You're not pudgy or fat, you're curvy and I love how your body looks."

Her brown eyes darted away, her cheeks growing a little dark. It made my heart sing to see her let her guard down and act so normal with me. She sighed and put her hand on her hips, returning to my gaze. "You can't always get what you want, No."

I frowned and folded my ears, racking the swimsuit back. "We came out here to the islands, it seems such a waste not to see you in a swimsuit."

Lorelai sighed and folded her arms once again. "Alice, does my opinion mean so little to you? Can you not simply respect my wishes and comfort level?"

"O-of course I can! I wasn't trying to be a brat... just..." I bit my lower lip and met her eyes. "I think you're gorgeous and wanted to show you off... even if it will be at night."

The sheep gave a grunt and I saw her posture shift as she moved her hands to her curvy hips once more before frowning. "Fine... I propose a trade."

I lifted my ears curiously and gave her a smile. "What's that?"

She cut her brown eyes to me and I could see her gaze wandering my body. "I will wear a swimsuit for you, but not something that I'm falling out of, It must be a one-piece."

My ears flicked and I clapped my hand's together as I grinned. "Really? I do not want to make you feel guilted into it."

"You have a funny way of showing that," Lorelai spoke the words in a stern voice.

I flinched and folded my ears. "I'm sorry... I've been trying to not act like such a brat so much... I know I get demanding and overbearing a lot of times..."

I felt her palm gently rest upon my cheek. "It is okay, I enjoy making you happy." I felt her grip my chin and she jerked my face back to hers. "You have grown a lot these last few seasons, but remember what you are deep down. Do not lose yourself to appease those around you, Alice."

I nod while staring into her soft brown eyes, then widen my gaze as she moved in and pushed her mouth to my own in a dominant kiss. I could feel her will behind it and my knees threatened to buckle from the gesture.

My arms wrapped around her neck and I pushed my body into her own eagerly. I still loved the fact that she and I were level with one another. It was nice to kiss someone without having to rise up on my toes or be picked up.

A small tone filled the sound system of the store and we parted lips, both our ears lifting. "Attention shoppers, the time is nine-thirty. The store will be closing in thirty minutes, please finish your shopping and make your way to the registers."

"We are short on time..." Lorelai spoke the words gently, rubbing my cheek affectionately.

I gave her a nod and reluctantly pulled from her arms. "R-right... let me find a nice one piece."

The sheep showed her teeth in a confident grin. "There is more to my stipulation, my rabbit..."

I met her gaze and blinked, my cheeks darkening at the haughty confidence in her gaze. "Yeah? Tell me, my sheep."

Lorelai trailed her finger down my throat. "You must wear a green swimsuit for me, a two-piece."

I felt my composure and maturity shatter. I gave her a fussy pout and folded my arms with a sulk. "T-that's not fair, why do you get to demand me in a two-piece?"

"Because I hold the cards in this exchange and life is not always fair, my cute little bunny." Lorelai hummed the words and pushed closer to me, patting my hip gently.

I gave a soft huff at her movement and confident attitude. The sheep pushed her forehead to mine and gave me a playful smile. "Well... time is running out, go find a nice one piece for me, I'm off to pick out a two-piece for you."

She pulled away from me and showed a playful grin before moving further into the swimsuit area. I shivered at being outplayed by her, loving her confidence. I quickly began to sort through swimsuits, looking for one I could agree with.

#

We returned to the beachside hotel after our early evening shopping trip. I stopped by the front desk to ask for a few hurricane glasses on the way to our room.

"What are those for?" Lorelai asked me curiously while we stepped from the elevator and made our way to the penthouse suite on the top floor.

"You will see, my sheep." I gave her a childish smile as we made our way into the room.

Lorelai came out of the bathroom several minutes after going in and had a frown upon her face. "I should have examined this more thoroughly, you sneaky rabbit..." She spoke the words and gave me a shake of her head.

"Hey... I followed the rules." I hummed the words and sauntered over to her, my hands resting upon her curvy hips. The swimsuit was a matching green to my own and clung to her curves like a second skin. There was a nice low cut near the top which made her breasts bulge and round against the material, showing a lovely deep cut of her ample cleavage. There was a small diamond shape at the center that was cut out, showing her navel.

"You are an underhanded lover." Lorelai squirmed on her feet and tugged at the top, I could see her peaks showing through the material while she fussed with it.

I gave her a laugh and put my hands on my hips. "Seriously? At least your swimsuit has support for that fine round butt of yours!" I put my hands on my hips and turned away from her, showing my backside. The green swimsuit she picked out was thin in the back, barely covering any of it. "It might as well be a thong at this point."

"It's perfect." Lorelai gives me a playful smile and I felt her hand lightly smack my butt before rubbing it. I gasped out at the impact to my mostly exposed rear, my small fluff of white tail flicking about erratically at her touch.

"You gave me such a lecture then put me in something so lewd." I turned to face her, crossing my arms under my breasts, letting them push forward. The green fabric hugged under the swell of my breasts to support them, then came up my chest, barely covering my nipples before crossing at my collar and moving behind my back.

"Once again... life is not always fair." The sheep gave me a cocky grin, her ears folded. I felt her hands move over my breasts, teasing at the tips of them with her fingertips.

I blushed and bit my lip, looking to see she had done so just so my peaks would be pushing out of the material like hers were. "You... really are a lewd sheep." I spoke the words and pulled from her grip, moving back into the kitchen.

"Aren't you happy I've gotten comfortable enough around you?" Lorelai gave me a smile and stood on the other side of the small bar adjoining the kitchen.

"I am! It... it makes me happy..." I blushed and gave her a smile before I set out the curvy glasses from the front desk.

"Why is that?" Lorelai asked me curiously, her eyes giving me an inquisitive look.

"Just deep thoughts you probably don't want to hear..." I glanced away from her piercing gaze.

The sheep stood on her toes and leaned over the bar. She grabbed my chin and moved my gaze to meet her own. "Something weighs upon you... tell me, now."

I blinked into her brown eyes, seeing the words were not a request. I bit my lower lip and tried to pull from her grip but she tugged my chin back to stare upon her. I folded my ears and sighed in defeat. "I've just been worried about my partners lately..."

"Are you having problems at home with your lovers?" She asked me curiously and tilted her head.

"No... nothing like that..." I felt her grip ease and pulled from her before stepping deeper into the kitchen. My tail flicked about as I ran my fingers through the back of my hair. "I just... Lorelai... I really like you, I really do. When I say you have my heart I mean it..."

She folded her arms and gave me a long calculated look, that detached look I would see when I was speaking with Lorelai of the council, not my lover. "Alice... are you about to break up with me?"

"What? No!" I spat the words out and quickly moved to her. My hands gripped hers and I pulled them to my lips, kissing the top of her fingers. "Not at all... I adore you and never want to lose you..."

I saw her gaze soften and saw something in her eyes, relief. She moved to cup my face and looked into my eyes with her own. "Tell me... just tell me plainly, what weighs upon you, my lovely rabbit?"

My body shuddered at her touch, I could feel her will wash over me both in comfort and compulsion to obey her. I nuzzled her palm and rested my hand on her wrist. "Have I stretched my love to thin... I asked Alex this a few weeks ago as well. Do you feel I cheapen our relationship, that I don't lo- like you as much as you deserve?"

Her eyes widened at my caught words and then narrowed back to their normal size. She read me like a book, staring into my soul and then pulled her palm from my own before she stepped away. I frowned when she turned her back to me and clasped her hands behind her. "Elias has never returned your love, has he?"

"He has not... he has beat around the bush, telling me he adored me, that he couldn't lose me, yet... He has never returned the words to me outright." I folded my ears and frowned.

"It will come in time, he and I are old and the words are more closely guarded. It does not mean we do not feel them, but to say it... to say it, opens something up inside us. It brings us to a vulnerability, one we have no doubt had stripped bare again and again in our time on this earth." Lorelai spoke the words in a forlorn tone of voice while looking out the windows at the beach below us.

"I suppose I'm being selfish again..." I sighed the words and shook my head.

"You are... but what is more selfish than love, Alice?" Lorelai looked upon me questioningly from the corner of her eye. I said nothing and simply nodded at her.

The sheep turned to fully face me and walked back to me. "You almost said the words to me, you stopped yourself though. Did you do so because you do not feel it, or you fear I will not return it?"

I shivered and shook my head. "D-do we... must we speak of this?"

"We must, and we will. Look upon me and answer my question, if you do not, I shall make you." She showed her teeth, her arms folded, the tone absolute and authoritative.

I met her eyes simply because her willpower demanded it, my teeth grit and I felt tears form in my eyes. "I... I hate it when you do this to me... when you strip my will and force me to speak..."

"And I do not like to see you in pain, nor sulking like a child." The sheep clicked her tongue and shook her head, her wooly curls bouncing slightly. "I am an old being, set in my ways like Elias, but I will hear your feelings for me. I will hear your true nature of what you think of me, of us..."

I wanted to pull my eyes from hers but I couldn't, her will was absolute and I couldn't even fathom disobeying her. I gave a defeated sigh and folded my ears. "Yes... like Alex, Katrina, Gloria, and Elias." I spoke the roster of names just to make myself feel disgusted as I uttered the words. "I feel love for you, I want to proclaim it, but I fear for more rejection as I do with Elias."

"We have been seeing one another for around seven months now. Do you know what that compares to in my time of existence? It would be like a single day to a mundane." She showed me a frown while gazing upon me. "And we do not see one another on a daily basis. I get a few days a month with you."

"Yes! I know, I'm stupid, childish and I don't know what love is! I get what you're saying to me, Lorelai!" I spat the words out bitterly and jerked my gaze away from her.

"I said none of those things, Alice." The sheep spoke the words to me gently.

"I said them myself! I already know!" I snarled at her and showed my teeth.

"Step before me and look upon me." Lorelai spoke the words and pushed her will forward. I didn't even try to resist and simply moved to her and looked into her soft brown eyes.

"You love me?" She asked again, in a pointed tone of voice.

I nodded and set my jaw, giving her the most resolved look I could muster. "I do. I don't care if it sounds insane to you."

I saw her gaze soften, I saw the sheep I knew on a personal level return to me. She looked away from me and shook her head. "What... did I tell you before... what was my advice when you asked about getting stronger?"

"You said... to live life, enjoy it..." I spoke the words softly.

"What else did I say?" The sheep had a faint hue of pink upon her skin now, the blood she had drank apparently going to work.

"Y-you said to make love like a hurricane." I blushed and gave her a weak smile.

"I didn't mean those words in simply the physical sense, Alice." She raised a brow to me curiously. "Do you understand what I'm saying to you?"

"That... it's okay to love you?" I asked curiously.

"It is... but..." Lorelai showed her teeth and I felt her frustration building before she shot me a glare. It was the eyes of the haughty fussy sheep I had grown to love. "Gods be damned rabbit! Have you not shredded enough of my barricades and wormed yourself deep enough into my soul?"

I raised my ears sharply and blushed. "Ah... Lorelai I don't-"

"Shut up! You are selfish, you think you are the only one to struggle with such things? Do you not consider how I feel, how Elias feels?" She showed me a glare and hissed the words bitterly. "To love someone... to love after so long, to let someone in like that... it is a dear, dear price to pay for us... that is... it is..."

"I'm sorry..." I lowered my ears and looked away.

"You stupid rabbit! You look upon me!" Lorelai spoke the words in a sharp heated voice and I jerked my gaze to her own obediently.

"Alice Blackpaw... you are an obstinate and selfish woman. You weaponize your love and don't even realize you do such a thing. You ask so much... too much... you assume it's easy because it seems to be so for you. Then you assume this mantle of martyrdom, that you are a villain for your feelings." The sheep spat the words at me while glaring into my eyes, tears filling her own as her teeth showed.

"You are a fool, you are a reckless fool! You are..." Lorelai huffed out and grabbed my shoulders, jerking me to her. She pushed her forehead to mine and snapped out the words. "Say it again, after everything I just told you, after tearing you down and telling you how wrong you are. Tell me again how you feel about me, now!"

I showed my teeth my eyes focused upon her. "Then I am a weak, selfish fool. Because I still say it and I mean it. I love you and you have my heart!" I spat the words out while glaring into her eyes.

I heard her swallow as she blinked at me several times and parted her lips. "You have... it's official... you have driven me mad... I feel the same. Gods and sanity be damned... You have my heart, you have my... love..."

I bit my lower lip hard, feeling the price she paid to say it, I felt her will weaken and her shoulders slump. "Lorelai... I-"

"No... still your tongue... you are a selfish child Alice, you have taken something from me. Something I have locked away and guarded for centuries... you were not satisfied... you had to have it... and now you do... you have it and for the first time in centuries... I am exposed and vulnerable..." She pulled away from me and turned, shivering as she hugged herself.

"I promise... I promise to take good ca-"

"I said still your tongue!" Lorelai shouted the words at me, tears flowing from her eyes. I nodded and pulled her into my arms, holding her in silence. We stood there for a time, I could see her reflection in the window, her teeth were clenched and though she didn't sob, her tears flowed forth.

Time seemed to drag and we stayed like that for several minutes before I felt her pull at my grip. I didn't want to lose her warmth and hugged tighter. "Just... a little longer... please?" She said nothing but slumped back into my arms to let me hold her.

"You... were wrong that night..." Her words came to me after a few more minutes, they came to me composed and calm, but not calculated.

"What do you mean?" I asked gently into her ear.

The sheep pulled from my arms and took a few steps away. "I was not lonely or sad... I didn't need the companionship or affection." She turned to look upon me, her arms behind her back. "I didn't need your touch or affection, Alice..."

"I see..." I looked away from her gaze. "I do not mean to be so self-"

"I will hear no more of your self-pity. Start taking responsibility for yourself, rabbit." She spat the words out at me sharply. I bit my lower lip and nodded at her.

"You now have the prize you so sought, how do you feel?" She spoke the words in a calm calculated tone.

"It was not a prize... I never sought to win or coax you." I muttered the words and shook my head.

"Did you not? Were you not desperate to hear the words from me, like you had been with your master?" Lorelai took a step towards me and I flinched at her words.

"Lorelai... please... I wasn't trying to-"

"I said no more self-pity!" She spat the words at me and showed her teeth.

"Then what the fuck do you want from me!?" I shouted back at her, showing my own sharp canines. "Do you hate me now for my love? I never wanted anything but to make you happy!"

She gritted her teeth and shook her head. "I do not hate you, far be it..."

I gave her a ragged tired breath and shot her the strongest glare I could manage in the wake of her willpower. "I say it again... what do you want from me?"

Lorelai jerked her gaze from mine and stuck her nose up into the air. "I have given you something no one has had from me in over half a millennia... You now have something from me I swore no one would ever have again, do you understand?"

"I can only fathom... but I understand as best I can... yes..." I spoke the words gently.

"If you hurt me... there will be no forgiveness for you... I will never speak to you again... I will never so much as look into your eyes. Do you understand?" Her words came out soft and weak sounding.

"I would sooner take a walk in the noonday sun than hurt you, Lorelai..." I stepped to her and moved a hand behind her head, pulling her gently against me.

The sheep closed her eyes and pushed her head into my chest, nuzzling at my breasts gently. "So it is... you have it... You have my love... I love you, Alice."

"I love you too, Lorelai. I will never betray your feelings..." I whisper the words and move my lips to hers, pushing her into a kiss with me.

Her body grew weaker at my touch and I felt her fingertips grip my shoulders. She pushed back against my mouth, kissing me in return. I felt her lips part and moved my tongue to her own while we embraced.

Lorelai pulled from my arms and parted from my mouth. "You are nothing but trouble... you are selfish..."

"I do not mean to be..." I spoke the words and slipped from her arms, returning to the kitchen.

"You are mine though... I question if I will not simply take you from Elias and the others in earnest." The sheep spoke the words casually while folding her arms over her stomach.

I shivered at her words and blushed. "Y-you... you're not serious are you?"