It had been another full day before I could attend to you properly. I found myself upon the sofa in the den, your head in my lap. "I do so hope your days here have been well my pet. I regret that I cannot attend to you as often as we both would prefer." I Hum the words gently while stroking your head.
"I believe I was going to tell you about Kazemde wasn't I?" I smile and look towards the crackling fire. "He's an interesting one to be sure..."
I clear my throat. "Let's pick up the next day after meeting him. I had a lot on my mind at the time..."
#
"Alex... how do you feel about my love?" I spoke out to him while leaning against the guardrail of the small balcony, outside of Gloria's bedroom. The sun had just dipped down into the horizon, the spring sky now a deep orange and purple. I had awoken early, the wolf stirring and following me outside, my movement having woken him as well. Our retriever was still very much passed out in bed, a satisfied look on her face and a faint snore on her breath.
"How do I feel?" He lifted his ears then drooped them in thought. He lowered himself to prop his own arms on the rail and looked into my face. "It makes me happy and it fills me with pride to know I have your heart."
"Do you though?" I showed my teeth as I spoke the words. "Katrina, Gloria and You. I have said I love all of you and you have returned my love." I shrugged my shoulders and looked out at dusk settling over the sky. "I have told Val and Lo- others as well... perhaps not said I loved them, but said they had my heart. They returned the sentiment as have all of you."
Alex looked at me questioningly for a long moment before speaking. "It does not bother me, I underst-"
"Why do you understand?!" I spat the words at him and showed my teeth, heat in my voice. "What if I were a normal vampire, or a member of your pack? What if I didn't have the excuse of being a succubus? Would you understand then?"
The wolf looked away from me and grew quiet. I hissed through my teeth and jerked my own gaze away in the opposite direction. We stayed like that for several moments before he finally called out to me. "What is this about, Alice? What's it really about?"
I felt a sigh escape my throat and shook my head. "I love all of you... and I love Elias. I've been through so much with him and for him. Yet he will not return the words."
"Ah..." Alex nodded and then turned to look upon me. "So you only defend your family for him. not for me or Katrina?"
"No, of course not. I love every one of you and stand proud to defend house Blackpaw." I spoke the words sternly and felt the pride in my voice when I did so.
"Alice, why does this weigh on you so? All of us care about you and all of us-"
"Because what if you don't?!" I fired back, showing my teeth and feeling my chest grow tight. "What if it's not your decision? What if it's the nature of what I am?"
"You think you're enthralling and coaxing our love for you?" Alex spoke up questioningly.
"I question if I am, yes! I don't deserve a single one of you, let alone all of you!" I almost shouted the words and felt my eyes burn, feeling the frustration and anger tearing at my chest.
Alex shook his head. "I don't think that's the case at all."
"Why would you say that?" I sniffled the words, tears in my eyes now.
The wolf pulled the small metal chair forth on the balcony and took a seat upon it. He then patted his lap. "Come here."
I said nothing but quickly slid into his lap, straddling and facing him. I felt his large hands moving to my face, brushing the tears away and moving up into my hair to rub at my ears. "You fight the hunger to feed daily, do you not?"
I nodded at him. "Yeah, so? Everyone in the family does, even you have monsters to fight off."
"Indeed, but the vampire in you wants you to kill for blood and the succubus wants you to kill for energy, no?" He continued to rub at my hair and ears, pulling me against his chest now.
I clung to his large strong chest, my cheek nuzzling it. "Yeah... the voice is there every time, no matter how nice the situation is, it's there telling me to push further and take it all."
"Remember how possessive you were getting yesterday?" He asked me pointedly.
"Y-yes... that was the demon in me. I know it's not how I truly feel." I blinked up into his amber eyes and tilted my head. "Why bring that up though?"
He showed his teeth in a grin to me. "If your demon had its way, we would be a harem, not a relationship, Alice. Encouraging love amongst us as you've done with me and Gloria, It would never want that."
I raised my ears at the notion. "O-oh... that's true... I never thought of it that way."
Alex rubbed at my head gently. "Alice, I don't think any of us love you because you're making us. I think it's because you show your feelings for us so powerfully and purely."
"Me? Pure?" I giggled and pushed my forehead to his chest. "Love like a hurricane huh..."
Alex moved a hand to rest on the back of my head. "Elias is from a different time than any of us can understand. Anyone that looks upon him knows he is head over heels for you. He simply can't say so for some reason."
I sighed and nodded my head. "Thank you... do you feel my love for you is stretched too thin?"
"I do not. I'm not jealous of the others you love, I knew what the rules were before I played the game with you." Alex growled the words and rubbed at my left ear gently.
I blinked up at him and gave a nod. "Y-you're right... I've always been transparent of what I am and whom I have..."
"That's right." The wolf showed his teeth and gently poked at my forehead with his fingertip. "The problem is, you think too much about this, Alice."
I gave a playful huff at his poke and quickly moved to nip his fingertip. The wolf yipped slightly at my bite then grinned upon me. His finger pulled from my mouth then his palm pushed over my face. "I don't care how many others say it, know that I love you, Alice. If more people love you that just makes me glad, it means you are happy and surrounded with love."