It was a beautiful moment ruined. Plenty of men had told Linda that they loved her but that was because they got to fuck her any which way they liked and was not to be taken seriously. It was a beautiful morning, her body replete and quiet after running with the moon, waking up to warm delicious sex from a man who then declared his love, it should have been a high but Linda's lies rendered it a mockery.
She needed to go, Ash was going to be furious when he found out, his unexpected declaration would curdle on his lips and she couldn't face him when he learned the truth. Her eyes blurred with the pain of what could have been. They could have been looking at a lifetime together if she hadn't wanted to get her own back on him that morning when he had turned away from her. When he'd thought she was lusting after the blood in the room rather than the man that he was. Linda gave a sour chuckle of despair as she loaded her few clothes into her bag. He'd been wrong about her then but it didn't balance what she had done to him.
Now she had what she wanted, the perfect man declaring that he loved her, she should have been wrapped around him in gratitude but she couldn't. Not knowing that his love would disintegrate with her confession and there were no odds about it she would have to tell him. The pack had sent a scout to find them; they would send another and another until Ash knew the truth. She was a worthless, lying...
"What's going on?"
Linda licked her lips, staring down at her hands clasped around her bag rather than at Ash. "They found us; we need to leave." More lies, her eyes filled with tears at her inability to tell him the truth.
Ash grunted. "So we'll move on, find somewhere new."
Linda's heart fluttered at the picture painted in her mind. The two of them together, loving and laughing and constantly running. Behind her Ash began to empty drawers, tossing his sparse belongings on to the bed. Anger flared, anger at her own stupidity, at the loss of all the potential they might have had together, Linda turned and looked at Ash. She had walked away from him when he'd say he loved her and here he was packing to go on the run with her only moments later.
"What was your fantasy?"
Ash frowned and stared at her. Unable to make the link between what he was doing and her question.
"You've hinted a few times that what you'd really like to do was something more than what we've done so far." Her flustered brain was trying hard not use any bad words to describe it, sinister, perverted, sordid, but before she went away she wanted to know.
"I think we more or less did it all with Hunter and Sheila." Ash chuckled dryly, a faint colour to his cheeks. He didn't quite meet her eyes when he brushed off the question.
"More or less isn't exact though is it?"
Ash dropped the handful of t-shirts back in the draw and turned slowly to face her. He licked his lips nervously. It seemed to take him several minutes to come to a decision.
"After I was turned, a long time after when I had control of my wolf, I took a woman to bed. Nobody special, just a girl in club who wanted a good time. Being a wolf is a pain; it ups the need and decreases the control. Well I was up for showing her a good time if it meant I got laid." He shoved his hands through his hair and scoffed bitterly. "I thought I was being gentlemanly, going down her, giving her a little extra. I knew it had been a long time and I figured I wasn't going to last long when we got down to it."
Linda nodded; half expecting that she knew where this was going.
"I was just getting into it when she pushes me away and starts bitching about the noises I was making." He pushed his hands in his pockets, old embarrassment flushing his cheeks. "I guess I must have been growling or something. I brushed over it and persuaded her to carry on, I was so hot for something, anything, that it was half in my mind to throw her down and fuck her anyway." He held up his hands in placating gesture, panicked that she thought he might have done so. "I didn't. It was just..."
"The wolf talking." Linda finished for him.
He nodded. "Anyhow we got down to it and I could feel my control slipping, I'd already had to clenched my hands away from her cos my claws had grown through. I was just about to blow, the first sex I'd had in over eighteen months and she starts screaming. Damn near jumped out of my skin. Oh my god, your eyes, she's yelling. We were just in a cheap motel; you know how thin those walls are. I was so shocked that I didn't stop her from running out the room stark naked." Ash gave a shrug as though it didn't matter. "I was more careful the next time, watched my breathing so I didn't growl, kept running over the seven times table so that I wouldn't get lost in the moment and eat her or anything, she starts to laugh, the minute I started to cum. Reckoned I sounded like an animal. I didn't bother after that, just looked after myself."
Linda licked her lips, keeping her eyes trained on the bureau behind him rather than draw his attention from the awkward memories.
"It wasn't till I met Sheila and Hunter that I realised you could have good sex as a werewolf. Really fucking good sex." He added, the memory sharpening in mind. He looked at her, studied her closely. "That almost made it worse. That it was possible, just not for me. Unless I hung around here hoping they were in the mood for a spare. It just made me really angry for long time after."
Linda took a step towards, taking a risk on guessing what that had led to. "You thought about hurting those girls."
Ash looked panicked once more. He took a step back from her, picked up the debris on the bed and began stuffing it in his holdall. He stood with his hands inside it, still clenched around his spare clothes. He hung his head.
"Every minute of the day." He sighed. "I wouldn't have done it, I swear I wouldn't have done it. But I used to wank to the idea of their horror. I got off on the idea of hurting them, fucking them, scaring them. I figured it would serve them right." Ash picked up the bag and tossed it at the wall. "I wouldn't have done it for real. When I saw you with those two... customers of yours... heard you... acting for them."
Linda bridged the gap between them, pushed her body between his and the wall. "Does it still get you hot?"
Ash gave a twisted smile. "Not like it used to." He cupped her cheek. "I get hot thinking about how you like it when I slap your arse or your tits. I get hot remembering chasing you through the woods, Hunter holding you in place whilst I stuck my cock in your arse, feeling you cum whilst we all fucked you." His eyes turned wolf with the heat of the memory, his cock rose up and prodded her stomach.