When I first met Mary I did not give her much thought. We were introduced just as I started my new job. I'd just been hired as the network administrator for a midsized business and her office was just across the hall from mine. She was the firms' accountant.
I could be cruel and say she looked the part, but there wasn't that much there. Mary stood 5' 5"and looked to be in her early 30's. She wore her blonde hair long, but simply curling on her back. She had a slightly plump build. I noticed her chest and what I could see of her legs from her conservative-length skirt. I barely thought 'nice legs' while being introduced. But Mary smiled and said 'hi' before I was taken around and introduced to the various staff members.
To say this was a conservative company was putting it mildly. I was handed a copy of the corporate values and #1 was "Honoring Jesus in all that we do." That took me back a bit, but I wasn't going to argue, needing the job after having been laid off for three months.
I soon found out, that like most Bible Belt places, there's a bit of hypocrisy. (After all, honoring Jesus wasn't going to get in the way of making a buck.) And like the Bible belt mentality, there was a double standard when in it came to sex. You know the towns with a church on every corner and a strip joint across the street? I was expected to enforce decency standards on the internet. Never mind, far more time was lost allowing management to check their stock portfolios, than to others surfing porn sites. Because of the nature of our business we couldn't use an internet filtering program, such as Net Nanny. Instead, I was supposed to routinely monitor the activity logs and report anyone surfing "indecent sites".
I quickly learned, as usual, there was a double standard in enforcing this rule. Employees could be fired but executives got a good deal less punishment. I saw how this could be turned to my advantage. For instance, when I found that the Human Resources manager had cruised some gay sites, I confronted him privately rather than logging it. I soon found that I got the assistant I needed and a bonus in my paycheck.
Mary's office was just down the hall from mine. I'd see her occasionally passing by. I learned a little about her; that she was married to a minister for 15 years and had a couple of kids. As befitting a preacher's wife, she dressed conservatively and professionally, wearing skirts that came mid-calf and loose blouses that hid her ample chest. She was polite and correct and conscientious at her job, but every now and then she'd say something that would give a hint to a buried fire of passion.
After a quiet few months, I found something in my check of the internet logs. Someone was surfing a website called "Literotica" and had been, for a few weeks. I quickly traced the activity to a computer and looked up to see to whom it was assigned. That's when I got a bit of a surprise. It was Mary's computer. I hadn't expected that one of the women in this office, let alone her, would be downloading porn.
I looked at the stories she'd read. Most of them were quite dark, dealing with bondage and pain and women being degraded in various ways. Mary's got quite a fantasy life; I thought to myself, I can't imagine that her preacher husband is into this. And I doubted that this conservative community had much of a BDSM scene.
I began to watch Mary, setting an alert on the computer to notify me when she accessed the Literotica website. She had a set pattern. She'd read stories for a while, then she'd make a trip to the ladies room. She'd return a few minutes later, and if one looked closely, you could see how flushed she was. Clearly Mary was getting relieving herself. Outwardly she may have appeared all business, but sin was her obsession.
I confront her one afternoon catching her as she leaves her office on the way to the restroom. Mary doesn't suspect that I know what she's been doing
"Mary, can I speak to you about a matter?" I ask
She hesitates and asks, "Ummm, can it wait?"
I can see she's perplexed, surprised I'd have a work issue to raise with her (Little does she know.)
"No, we better deal with it now."
I take her by the arm and physically escort her into my office and lock the door.
Mary sits down next to the desk as I begin to describe to her what I found.
She turns an ashen color, embarrassed and stricken with fear having been found out.
"I don't want to report this to Human resources, the last time I did they fired the person." I tell her.
I stand before her at the desk.
Tears are forming in her eyes as she looks at me. She clearly believes she will be ruined. She may lose her job, her reputation in the community will be trashed, and maybe even her husband will lose his position; all because she gave in to those dark desires of hers.
Ok, I think now it is time to soften the blow I place my hands on her shoulders and ask, "Are things all right at home?"
She looks at me questioningly.
"How are things with your husband; can he satisfy you in bed?"
She barely whispers, "No."
"He doesn't understand your needs does he?"
"No..."
"You have these dark thoughts, from deep inside."
