When his day at the garage had been as long and boring as this one, Kevin occasionally masturbated around closing time. He was titillated by the badness of it, but reassured by the relative safety: he was behind his desk, and should anyone walk in they would find a strong young man relaxing after a hard days work, his unzipped coverall the equivalent of a loosened tie. He wasn’t that young, though; in his late twenties but in fine shape, long hours in the garage wearing the fat from his body and broadening his shoulders, making him strong, if not young.
He felt young though, when he did this kind of thing. It was silly, but after a day like this, man did it help.
The Congressional Committee in his mind had just commissioned his hand to venture southward on a fact-finding mission; his hand had reported back that the proposal was well received by all concerned and recommended immediate action. He had just decided to drop his zipper behind his desk and get to work when the ding-strip out front chimed, informing him a customer had arrived. He muttered a silent curse and rose, damning himself for not flipping the OPEN sign over five minutes early, as was his wont. It was almost six o’clock, closing time; he’d successfully broken the habit of closing up the garage early (as it tended to drive off the business that inevitably arrived in that period), but this is what happened when he didn’t.
The front office was small and he traversed it quickly, peering between the blinds that flanked the door. A sexy little red car was humming outside; a Dodge Viper if he wasn’t mistaken. He sighed as he opened the office door, tingling the bell and letting in a gust of cold air. Rich customers were always the worst. Used to getting what they wanted when they wanted, the wealthier crowd tended to be impatient and condescending to Kevin, whom they mistakenly thought was just another dumb grease-monkey. But, a degree in electrical engineering notwithstanding, he was still a grease-monkey, and he stepped outside to see what this unwelcome guest wanted.
The front bumper was practically kissing the closed garage door, and as he rounded the car from behind, his short dark hair blowing in the stiff wind, the tinted window on the driver’s side lowered and an imperious, faintly British-sounding female voice issued from within. “If you don’t hurry up, I’m going to be even later, which will make you very unhappy.” Her voice was calm and composed, but was obviously one used to getting its way. As Kevin approached the open window, he saw that she looked like a business woman, very well put together, sunglasses (despite the cloudy, threatening day) and long, dark hair.
Damn. It was a Sunglasses Bitch. They were the severely pretty women who drove around in nice cars and never smiled, and Kevin had a special place reserved for them in his heart, a place he imagined every man held for the women he would like to sleep with but whom would never give him the time of day. A thin streak of anger boiled up his throat but he suppressed it, long experience informing him that it never helped to get pissy with customers like this, who could turn the pissiness back on him tenfold and still expect to get exactly what they wanted.
If it hadn’t been such a dog of a day, she wouldn’t have gotten to him, and he forced himself to speak in a reasonable tone. “Ma’am, I might not even be able to help. I’m just about to close and if your problem is a serious I’ll have to –“ Of course she cut him off. Of course.
“Look, boy.” Oooh! but she had a way with words! “I don’t have the time to tell you all the ways I can make your life miserable. I can tell you that you will now open the door, I will drive in, and you will fix my car. After that, we’ll never have to speak to each other again.” She hadn’t raised her voice or moved her hands from ten and two, but Kevin felt the force of her gaze from behind the sunglasses and almost began moving to the door switch in spite of himself.
“Look,
lady
,” he said acidly, trying to keep his tone cool and failing, “I clock out in five, no,
four
minutes. If your problem takes longer than ten—“ But she had already turned her head forward, looking at the garage door.
In the same calm, icy tone, she said, “Open the door, or I will put the car through it.” She punctuated this with a small roar from the car. “Then, you will have to not only fix my problem, but any damage incurred as well. Now GO.”
He started, hating himself for it. Without that accent, this would be so much easier…! “If you so much as
think
—“
“I’m sorry, did you misunderstand me? I said GO!”
He stared in disbelief for a moment. He briefly debated telling her to shove it and just letting her drive through the garage door, which he had no doubt she would do, but it would put him in dutch with the owner of the garage, who was grooming him to take over the joint in less than a year, and besides, he was so angry he couldn’t speak, even to tell her to shove it.
A tiny, mocking smile flickered across her mouth. “Do it. Now.” Kevin was so astounded at her temerity he couldn’t think, couldn’t even see. Then she revved the engine again, and his autopilot took over, carrying him to the panel next to the garage door, bringing his arm up, and flipping the switch.
The door rose slowly. He stood next to the switch, quivering with fury over his cowardice, impotent in his submission. How had she so neatly gotten under his skin? He’d been treated like this before, but… Was it that hint of an accent? Maybe it was her complete assurance that he was a toad, good for nothing but scurrying around to do her bidding. Yeah, that probably had something to do with it.
Another flicker of a smile and her window rose, cutting them off. He watched her purring car enter the garage, the ding-strip chiming again for her rear tires. When the car was fully inside, the engine cut off and there was silence but for the ticking of the car as it cooled down.
He took a deep breath to calm himself.
I can get through this,
he told himself.