True Self

Last night's activities left me wanting more, needless to say getting myself using my favorite toys did not do the intended job. I craved the real thing. I desired ten inches of thick white cock.

"You're staring," Jacob said as he brought me back to my sad reality.

"I can't help it," I said, trying to keep my eyes from Kyle's crotch.

I was beginning to think that last night was a mistake on my part, who cares that his girlfriend and soon to be wife was in love with him. I wanted what she had, and if Kyle was telling the truth, she wasn't reaping all the benefits of having a profoundly massive dick in her life.

"You can't," Jacob whispered to me.

"Why not?" I replied.

"It's ethically wrong, and you know it," Jacob said as he stared at me.

He was right; of course, I didn't want to be the other woman. I had been cheated on before, and I hated it. "You're right," I said, shaking my head.

"You guy's good?" Kyle said as he came to check on us.

"Yeah," I responded.

There it was the smile that let me know he had sex last night. I knew that smile all too well. "How's what his face?" Kyle said as he came into my cubicle.

"Dumped him," I replied as I tried not to stare at his crotch.

"Size queen strikes again, huh?" Kyle whispered.

"You know it," I smiled.

"Speaking of which," Kyle smiled. "Thank you for being a good friend last night, I was at a weak point, and you came through for me."

"Gabrielle is a good woman," I lied. I hated her not because of anything she had done, but what she had, and what she wasn't using.

"Maybe I could get you two together," Kyle said. "Maybe you can teach her that thing you do."

I smiled and turned in my seat, so I faced him. "What thing?"

I had a unique technique that Kyle said no woman could ever do with him because of his impressive length.

"You know," Kyle said as he stood uncomfortably. I could tell he was getting hard.

"Nope, not a clue," I teased.

"Cock and balls," Kyle said quickly in a voice that was barely a whisper.

"Still no clue," I lied.

I knew what he liked and what he was talking about, I had watched a porn video where the woman got the full length of the man's dick in her mouth then used her hands to maneuver his balls into her mouth, she looked like a chipmunk with a mouth full of nuts, but the man came hard in her mouth.

It took some practice for me to get it done with Kyle, but after I did it once he wanted it done all the time, which being the woman I am, I was happy to oblige. I even got good enough to deepen throat him and get his balls in my mouth as he came. He labeled me the true size queen after I did that three times in a row.

"I want you to teach her how to take my cock and balls into her mouth," Kyle said as he leaned down to my ear.

"No," I said, spinning my chair back to face the computer. "That is my trick and mine alone."

"You could be such a bitch sometimes," Kyle said as he shot out of my cubicle."

"I know," I said as I went back to work.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~~ ~ ~ ~ ~

"Congratulations!" I said as my sister broke the news to me.

Even though I knew that she would eventually move in with her boyfriend, the news still made me smile. I could never be in an interracial relationship, but it worked for her, she was happy around him, and it was visible to see that he treated her like gold.

"You're not angry?" Claire asked as she stared at me.

"No!" I shook my head, "Why would you ask a stupid question like that?"

"Well, I know you don't like that he is not white," Claire said.

I stopped making dinner and turned to her. "I am not my mother," I said, shaking my finger at her. "If you knew her, you would know that I am far from the racist that she was, just because I wouldn't do it, I don't expect everyone else to follow suit. And I have never said it was bad or evil or anything like that, it's just not for me, that's all."

"You sure?" Claire asked.

"Absolutely," I nodded as I returned to my dinner making. "I was fine when I was by myself, and it's not like you are far away."

"I will still return home for your lasagna some days," Claire said as she looked down at the dish.

My bed skills were top-notch, but my cooking skills were off the chain as someone had once said, I specialized in Italian cooking, even though both my parents were full-blooded redneck American. They were both proud of their blue-collar roots. It seemed when Dad left my mum. He turned a leaf. He raised Claire utterly opposite of how Mum had raised me.

I wasn't even allowed to bring people of color home, let alone talk to them in front of her. I once nodded to a fellow classmate who happened to be of a different race while I was at the grocery store. My mum ripped me apart the whole way home.

When she passed away, the church was nearly empty. Hardly anyone came to pay their respects. She was a mean, backstabbing, bitch, and no one liked her.

I settled down to watch television. Claire had gone to see her boyfriend, as well as taking him half the lasagna, he loved my cooking. It was how I got most men, a good meal, and an even better blow job, and they were putty in my hands.

"You still up," a text came from Kyle

"Yeah, why?" I replied.

"I got an odd email today and thought you should know about it," Kyle responded.

I sat up on the couch and waited. I knew Kyle hated slow responses to his texts.

Within moments he was calling me.

"What email," I asked as I answered.

"I hate when you do that," Kyle said.

"I hate texting," I replied.

"The email was from someone named Ryan Tankerson, he wanted to know if I knew you," Kyle said.

My heart felt like it dropped right out of my chest. "Leslie?" Kyle said as I had gone quiet.

"What did you say?" I asked, trying not to tip Kyle off to my high school problems.

"I haven't answered yet," Kyle said.

I wanted to tell him not to respond or lie or anything to throw Ryan off my track. I tried to stay under the radar, not friending anyone who went to my high school on any social media. Hell, I used a different name on most of my social media accounts. Anything to make sure no one would be able to find me, but it seemed it hadn't worked.

"Oh, okay," I said, pretending that I was okay when inside I had already given my two weeks' notice and was trying to find another job.

"I wanted to check with you first before I did," Kyle said. "I checked up on him. It seems he is well connected in the sports world. I didn't know you knew anyone that well connected."

"I went to high school with someone named Ryan," I said as if I was shrugging it off. "Guess he found me, kind of stalkerish if you ask me."

"Oh," Kyle said, "Another one that didn't measure up to the size queen standards."

"Never got that far, to be honest," I lied.

"Okay, point taken, I will ignore it," Kyle said. "We all have people in our past that should remain in the past."

"Thanks," I said.

"No problem," Kyle said, this time I knew he was lying, I knew that voice. He was up to something. "Hey, before you go, do you remember that show about the vampire slayer. I think her name was Buffy?"

'Bastard!' I thought to myself. Ryan had talked to him, I am sure they had a long talk, and now Kyle wanted something.

"What do you want?" I asked.

"You will see, I will talk to you tomorrow, Buffy," Kyle said as he hung up.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~~ ~ ~

I hardly slept a wink. I even talked to Stephanie, who was in the middle east doing a photoshoot, she had sent me a few pictures she had gone topless in a few of them. It seemed they had the talk and she was going to go for the gold. When I told her what happened, she said she was going to go after Ryan. I knew there was no holding her back, so I gave her the go-ahead.

I walked into work and looked around for Kyle. I knew whatever he wanted would be something that I would have to do. I had gone through every scenario. Kyle knew where I lived. He knew every social media account I had. He knew where I worked, the car I drove. He knew everything there was about me. Apart from leaving the state and starting over again, there was no way to get out of it.

"Are you okay, Cooper?" Anderson asked as I sat down at my station. He hardly ever called anyone by their first name, just as he hated being called by his, I stared at him for a moment then nodded.

"Okay," Anderson said as he walked away.

"Hi!" Kyle said as he walked onto the floor. "Tony?" he asked. "I thought you were scheduled for the later shift?"

"I wanted to get a few things put into the folders before I started my shift," Anderson said as the two exchanged glances.

Maybe I could talk to Anderson and get him on my side. The chances were slim to none that he would do anything about it, but I knew he hated Kyle as much as I did now.

"Hi," Kyle said as he made his rounds. I buried my eyes onto my screen and then answered the first call that came up.

Kyle walked by me and saw that I was on a call, he simply smiled then showed me his phone. There it was a new contact, by the name of Ryan T. Kyle slowly walked away and continued his path.

I knew eventually we would have to talk, and I was dreading it. Jacob came in late. Something was bothering him. He was never late.

"Do you know someone by the name of Ryan," Jacob blurted as he sat down.

'This wasn't happening,' I thought to myself Ryan had found me. Which wasn't surprising with his connections, eventually it was a matter of time.

"I'm sorry," I said.

"I told him I didn't know you," Jacob said as he put his stuff away. "He didn't believe me. Later I got a call, then a friend request from Sally Bellinger," Jacob said with fear in his voice as he said the name his voice trembled. "She was a cheerleader in high school, the cheerleader," Jacob said as his hands shook as he logged in, I knew that look, I knew the signs poor Jacob wasn't in his cubicle or even inside the building, he was back in high school. "She knew I had a crush on her and she pretended that she felt the same way, I was stupid how could the most popular cheerleader like the biggest nerd in all of our school, she took me behind the bleachers and pretended to make out with me. When they jumped me, the whole football team, they ripped my clothes off and blindfolded me and threw me into the back of Harold Handsen's truck,"

"Stop," I said as I rushed from my cubicle to his, "You're here now," I said, shaking him to bring him back to this reality. "It's over."

"Is it?" Jacob said, staring at me. "I still go to therapy for the things they did to me, for the things they made me do."

"She won't bother you anymore. I promise," I said as I stood up. "I will end it right now."

"Thank you," Jacob said, visibly shaken.

I walked to the back where Kyle was stationed. I passed Francis, who was staring at her cup of coffee. Usually, she was perky and kind. Today she was just staring at the coffee mug. There was no doubt Ryan had got to her as well.

"What do you want!" I yelled at Kyle as I got to his station.

"That is such a loaded question," Kyle smiled.

"Cut the bullshit," I said, staring down at him. I might be powerless when it came to Ryan, but I could stand on my own two feet when it came to Kyle.

"It's not what I want. It's what you are willing to give," Kyle said. "I have never met someone like Ryan, he is not someone that takes no for an answer, he got to me just like everyone else, except I wasn't a nerd that had the whole football team laughed at and painted obscenities over his entire fat, chubby, body, or was I a flaming lesbian in my college years, and now have a conservative husband and three kids."

That's what happened with Francis and Jacob. I shook my head and looked down at him.

"How?" I asked.

"Let's just say my first few times were very fast, and the news got around, I got called a few nicknames, and college wasn't the best place to be," Kyle said as he stared at me.

I nodded. "What do you want? Or should I ask what does he want?" I asked.

"He wants to know everything about you," Kyle said. "You are the one that got away; after all, he wanted to do so many things to you and poof after High school you vanished," Kyle laughed. "We have so much in common, Ryan and me, we both made fun of people, the only difference is now he holds all the cards."

I shook my head. "Both of you deserve each other," I was disgusted by the man in front of me.

"Oh, the two of us will be best buds soon, but I won't tell him a thing about you if you meet certain, shall I say demands?"

I looked back at Jacob's and Francis's cubicles. I had no choice. "The usual place in an hour," I said as I went back to my chair.

I sent a text to Stephanie. I wanted her to destroy Ryan. She sent me a text back. It seemed Ryan was more of a match than she thought about, her trip to Spain for her next photoshoot had been canceled due to some unforeseen circumstance. She also received an email from one of her other companies that stated they were dropping her.

I told her to stop that I would have to handle things myself. Ryan's connections were secure. Which made me think he already had the information he needed. What was he waiting for? For me to beg? No that wasn't his style, he wanted something from me, what could it be?

"It's time," Kyle said as he walked past my cubicle.

'Shit!' I said to myself as I had let the time pass me by thinking about Ryan and his plans.

It was lunchtime, and most of the employees were making their way out of the building and either going to the rows of food trucks parked along the road or driving downtown which was only a few minutes' drive.

The usual spot was a smaller building that had been condemned. It sat between our building and the other four that made up our business complex. Kyle and I had gone there many times during our relationship.

I bent low and went through the wired fence, following Kyle as he pushed the rusted door open. As I entered the dimly lit building, I followed him as he went around what we guessed used to be the main warehouse floor, and then up to the office.

"Remember this place?" Kyle smiled as he shut the door.

"Let's just get it over with," I said as I pulled back my hair.

"Good, straight to the point," Kyle said as he stood before me. "I am not forcing you. You have a choice."

"Oh, shut up," I shook my head. "That's Ryan talking, not you. You are just the meat puppet. I remember Ryan's antics."

"You remember, huh?" Ryan's voice said from Kyle's phone as he showed it to me.

I froze as I stared at the phone, there was his face, he was sitting in his car and staring right through me. "When Kyle told me you had turned into his little slut, I didn't believe him. How could Puffy Buffy turn into a slut, then I remembered the night we went into the closet, do you remember that?"

I simply nodded, not saying a word.

"You grabbed my dick so hard and squeezed, like it was the first time you ever felt one," Ryan laughed.

"Then the sheer horror on your face when I felt your, well, I was going to say boobs, but we both know what happened," Ryan snickered.

"She is still flat as a board," Kyle said as he pushed me back so Ryan could get a full view of me.

"Not even a late bloomer, how sad, a pretty face like yours. On a body so flat without any curves to speak of," Ryan said.

"What do you want," I said as I looked at the phone.

"I want to see what you have become, what else?" Ryan said. "I don't want you, that time has passed, I want to see if what Kyle here has said is true, then I will leave your precious friends alone."

"Still the bully, huh?" I said as I stared a hole through him. "Still wanting to be the center of attention?"

"Sweetie, I walk in a room, and I am the center of attention," Ryan laughed. "I make NFL owners tremble when I call them. I have made athletes millions of dollars, I have packed seats in stadiums around the country, just by moving my pawns, I mean clients to different teams. Not just in football, but baseball, tennis, soccer, basketball. All of them owe me, and with a simple phone call, I can ruin lives."

"You're still pathetic," I said, grabbing the phone. "One day..."

"What? Your bimbo girlfriend will do what?" Ryan said. "Men own the magazines she poses for, her paycheck comes from men. Yes, those men love scantily clad women, but what they love more is money and power. I have both, a simple phone call and those men get exclusive rights to some of my clients posing with their scantily clad women. Their ratings will go through the roof!"

That's how he got to overpower Stephanie.

"Now, show me that Kyle here is a liar or he is telling the truth, and I will drop everything," Ryan said. "If he is a liar, well, he knows what will happen."

Kyle's face shook, "She might not want to, but you will see," he said as he zipped his pants down.

'Damn it,' I said to myself as I looked at his cock, staring back at me.

"I told you," Kyle said as I couldn't take my eyes off it. "She is a size queen. She loves the thick, long ones."

"I can see that," Ryan replied.

I wanted to take my eyes off it, prove them both wrong, that I was in control here.

"You can leave, and then you would prove him wrong," Ryan said.

"She won't," Kyle said, "mainly because she loves when I fill that throat of hers."

My eyes shot up and looked at Kyle. He knew my weakness. He was right as I looked at his dick throb and got harder. I wanted it down my mouth and straight down my throat. 'What was wrong with me,' I thought as I started to kneel in front of him. 'I could leave. They won't holding me here," I thought as my hands wrapped around his thick ten-inch cock.

"You were right," Ryan said as Kyle showed him that I was on my knees with my mouth open, ready to take his cock into my mouth.

"Take it," Kyle said as he held the phone.

I didn't hear them anymore as I wrapped my mouth around his cock and started to suck it. "I won," Kyle said as he gloated. "She's mine now."

"You did," Ryan said "I am amazed, look at Buffy the cock sucker go," he said as he watched me take Kyle's cock into my mouth, within seconds I had it halfway down, I had full intention of taking all of his cock.

"Well, you enjoy," Ryan said. "I have meetings to attend. I want more pictures and videos daily."

"Oh, you will get them," Kyle said.

Kyle hung up the phone but started to take pictures of me with his cock balls deep in my mouth. "Lift your head," he ordered. I obeyed. As usual, I had become his cock slut. He took pictures of my throat bulging out. "Now, do it," he ordered.

I took a deep breath before I took his entire length into my mouth and down my throat. I reached up with my hands and squeezed and pushed his balls into the corners of my mouth. "There is my size, queen!" he laughed as he snapped picture after picture.

"Now, finish me off!" Kyle barked at me.

'How could I be so turned off by someone, but yet turned on at the same time,' I thought to myself as I plunged my head further down onto his dick. I felt the slight stubble of pubic hair on my nose as I buried my head into his pelvis.

"That's it, you big cock slut!" Kyle raved as he held my head in place. "Take it all!"

"Shut up, already," I said, releasing his cock from my mouth. "I like your cock, not you, now shut up!"

At first, I was reluctant to be here, but staring at his dick coated with my saliva and throat fluids, all I wanted was it. I loved how long and thick it was. I loved the veins that ran along the side of it. All I wanted was this cock, deep in my throat, deep inside of me. Yes, that's what I wanted.

I slowly stood up and bent over the old, dirty table, it was filthy with years of dirt, rat shit, and pieces of debris, but I didn't care. I bent over it and thrust my ass up at him.