"What in the hell do you think you are doing?" he spat harshly.
Lena yelped in fear, and the crystal glass of champagne slipped from her fingers, shattering into a glittering pile at her feet. The faint, pleasant buzz of the expensive golden nectar instantly vanished, and Lena was hyperaware in her terror.
She wanted to retreat as he slowly advanced on her, his face darkly marked with fury, but she was completely immobilized with fear. It commanded all of her willpower to keep from fainting.
"I...I'm s-sorry—"
She winced as his large hand suddenly reached for the back of her head, his fingers twisting and locking in her curled, highly styled hair. She followed weakly as he pulled her towards his furious face by her hair, fearful of the impending pain.
"You...have humiliated me...in my own home," Renz said slowly.
Tears began to well in her eyes as she thought about how careless she'd been, how foolish and stupid she'd been. She searched his gray eyes for an emotion, any emotion, other than anger. His anger was too much for her to bear. But he appeared relentless in his rage.
She looked down as Renz's deep, fuming breaths covered her face and slightly tousled the loosening strands of hair. His grip was only tightening, and Lena began wondering if he intended to hurt her.
"I'm so sorry, sir," she whispered shakily.
Renz sharply inhaled, and Lena mustered up the strength to look at him again. She tried to find the gentle part of him that was safe, the part that loved her, but his anger seemed to be an endless vacuum.
Perhaps he didn't love her at all anymore.
Several moments passed and Renz neither spoke nor moved, and Lena wondered if he planned on banishing her. The thought that her actions had hurt and angered him so deeply filled her with guilt and remorse, and her heart filled with sorrow when she realized that she would not be forgiven.
She realized then that this would be the climax of their relationship, the end of their story. She'd slowly brought about the good in Renz over several months, but in a matter of foolish minutes, had completely destroyed it. Whatever they shared was now over.
She closed her eyes and thought about the last few days, her request in the hotel, every choice she'd made, every word she'd spoken, and she wondered where she'd gone wrong, what she could have changed. Surely everything between them didn't lead to this. Surely what they had, whatever it was, was better than this.
******
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Lena looked up at Renz as she felt the carriage begin to slow. Her heart was beating erratically, but the sight of his serene, handsome face somewhat quelled her nervousness.
It only took a brief moment for Renz to realize Lena was looking at him, and he glanced down at her fondly. She felt his large hand cover hers, lightly brushing her knee on top of her silken layers. She searched his calm gray eyes, wondering if it was too soon to expect an answer to her request.
But no answer was found.
"You could just...say no and be done with it," Lena whispered. Even though they were in the privacy of the spacious coach, Lena was still worried the driver could hear her.
"My first instinct is to grant you anything and everything you ask of me, Lena," Renz said.
"But...not this?" she asked nervously. Lena looked away from him as she saw tension begin to appear on his face. She did not want to see or hear his refusal.
But then she felt his touch, and Lena slightly jumped up in surprise. His hand was warm and soothing against her icy cheek, gently beckoning her gaze to return to his.
"I haven't said no, have I?" Renz purred quietly.
"You haven't said yes," Lena answered.
His expression became darker, almost sad, and Lena looked away from him again. Her chest swelled with pain as she realized that Renz would likely never grant her what she asked.
She could feel tears begin to well, but Lena urgently closed her eyes in an attempt to re-absorb the evidence of her sadness and frustration. For some reason she didn't quite understand, the idea of crying in front of Renz terrified her, even though he'd seen her cry many times before. Something had changed between them. Something felt...different.
Lena steadied herself with resignation as she rebuilt her courage, and tried to bury the request she'd made of Renz. It was painful for her to let go of her wish, for it almost felt like she was abandoning something that felt...essential. She hoped that she could eventually forget about it, along with the feeling that she was making some kind of fundamental personal sacrifice.
"Do you still want to visit Jonathan?" Renz said after several minutes of silence. Lena nodded slowly.
"I do...I would like to," she said absently, thankful for a change in topic.
Renz slightly knocked against the roof of the coach, and Lena could hear the driver begin to dismount.
Renz reached for her again, closing the physical and emotional distance that had suddenly formed between them. His touch, although gentle, was almost territorial, but Lena welcomed his gentle possession. At first it had been frightening, but now, it felt safe.
"Lena...there's something I need to tell you about Jonathan," Renz said suddenly. Lena looked up at him curiously, somewhat overcome with a feeling of unease as she watched his focused face.
"He doesn't want to see me," Lena said flatly. Renz shook his head.
"Lena...I wanted to bring you to Sterling Manor because Jonathan's health is...rapidly deteriorating," Renz said.
Lena's mouth fell open, and she felt the fear and sorrow slowly begin to percolate through her limbs, rendering her almost immobile with dread.
"How long have you known?" Lena asked.
"I only found out a few weeks ago. While you were healing," Renz replied.
The coach door opened, and Lena slowly crawled out. Her satin shoes slightly sunk into the soft earth that surrounded manor, and it took Lena several moments to steady herself. But she was filled with a bittersweet joy when she inhaled the slightly moist, pastoral air of Sterling Manor, that almost sweet, earthy scent she was so familiar with.
She was home.
She brought her eyes to the Tudor-style manor, and Lena completely forgot about any sense of propriety. She bolted forward and ran towards the front entrance, paying no attention to the inhibitions the layers of her gown gave her. She was no longer Lena, mistress of Renz Wolfenbarger. She was just Lena, nameless Lena, a long lost servant of Sterling Manor, desperate to see its Master.
Lena paused for a few moments to catch her breath before she entered, and she realized that something was highly unusual. The grounds were far too quiet. There were no servants, anywhere.
Renz approached from behind then, and extended his long arms, and pushed open the large wooden front doors.
She gasped in shock when she observed the entryway of Sterling Manor. It was nothing like the polished splendor she'd grown up in. It was filthy, and it was severely neglected. Piles of dust and debris covered the floors, and cobwebs hung from the ceiling. Lena slightly yelped in surprise when she saw a small, furry creature rapidly scuttle across the floor in front of her with faint squeaks.
Lena took several tentative steps, and the sound of her heels hauntingly echoed throughout the entryway. It was very dark, but in the few areas where sunlight entered, Lena could see particles of dust slowly swirling around.
Her heart began to pound as anxiety began to overtake her body the further into the manor she walked. She hurried towards the stairs, and gripped the railing with all of her strength. She could feel Renz walking behind her, keeping his distance. And oddly enough, she was grateful for that. There was a part of her that wanted to be alone to process all that had changed.
But once she reached the top of the stairs, the feeling vanished. The second floor was even more unrecognizable than the first, and Lena was filled with the disturbing sensation of utter unfamiliarity. The last thing she wanted was to be alone and abandoned with nothing but that horrible sensation to comfort her.
Lena turned towards Renz, and he wordlessly extended his arms to her. She held onto him tightly to keep herself from falling apart, not quite listening as he whispered in her ear. She breathed in his scent deeply, hoping to absorb some of his omnipresent strength. And after a few minutes, Lena felt as if she could walk on her own again.
"We can leave if you'd like, Lena," Renz said softly. Lena shook her head and distanced herself from his grasp.
"I need to see him," she replied determinedly. Renz sighed heavily and offered his arm to her, and Lena held onto him tightly. She led them through the halls of the estate, trying to reacquaint herself with the place she'd spent most of her life.
As she continued walking, Lena noticed that Sterling Manor wasn't just different because of the filth and lack of servants. Its possessions were gone as well. Lena could find no sign of the art that Mrs. Sterling had spent so many years collecting while she was alive. The paintings and tapestries were gone, the rugs were gone, the curtains were gone...Sterling Manor had been stripped almost completely bare.
"Are these Jonathan's rooms?" Renz asked softly. Lena nodded tensely, and for a fleeting moment, she thought about turning away. But Lena banished the thought and gripped the door handle on impulse, and flung it open before she could change her mind.
"Good heavens...Lena!" she heard.
Lena felt Renz instantly release her from his arm as Marie came bolting towards them. Lena flinched as the woman approached her, terrified that she would be slapped again, as she had the last time they'd seen each other. But instead of a harsh blow, she felt Marie's arms rapidly encircle her shoulders, holding her much like she had when Lena was a child.
Lena was frozen where she stood as Marie hugged her. She knew she should have been more receptive, grateful even...but something about the embrace didn't feel as genuine as she remembered.
"I've been so worried about you," Marie said, finally releasing her. Lena still felt stunned as she observed Marie, and began to recognize her face again. She'd lost weight since she'd last seen her, and her hair had several more strands of silver. But her smile was exactly the same, if a bit more strained, and Lena felt a rush of familiarity and love run through her body.
She ungracefully leaned forward and hugged Marie again, too tightly. It aggravated her still sore rib, and Lena had to bashfully remove herself from the embrace.
"What's happened? Are you all right?" Marie asked, her voice full of motherly concern. Her hand tenderly reached out to Lena's side, stroking her sore rib softly.
But Lena had no intention of telling Marie how the injury occurred.
