The Sharpest Lives

Sweet Dreams

My belly felt cold, cold, cold.

I lay on the bed, and looked up at Liam. His eyes were fixated on my navel.

"How old is it?" asked Liam.

"About 9 weeks now," replied the doctor, as she moved the probe around my abdomen, looking at the screen. "Does that sound right?"

"I-I guess -but I had used contraception..." I said uneasily. She pushed it deeper again against my skin, and I winced.

"Well, those fail sometimes," she said, quickly releasing the pressure. "Although that's pretty rare. Are you sure you took it in time?"

"Yes..." I replied. I moved uneasily as she pressed the probe deeper again.

After my last time with Liam, he had given me another morning after pill. I remember taking it from him...

You don't know that it was a morning after pill. I just gave you a pill, and it could've been anything from sugar to poison, and you took it like the obedient little girl you are...

I took it.

I froze on the bed as I realized this, staring up the ceiling. Liam noticed my sudden change of mood, because he gently ran a hand through my hair.

"Are you alright?" he asked. He looked at me, anxious.

I'll never be alright, I thought.

"I'm fine," I replied, turning away, not meeting his gaze.

"Don't worry, all first time mums get a bit worried," commented the doctor as she typed away on her keyboard.

We waited silently as the pictures got printed out. She handed me the open folder, smiling warmly. I smiled back robotically, clasping the folder shut. I didn't want to look at it.

I followed Liam's back out of the room, shivering as thought the cold gel had permeated my bones. He didn't turn around; he didn't stop until he reached the counter, while I stood by quietly, my head down. Only after we had reached his car did he look directly at me again.

"What's wrong?" he inquired.

I looked at him, at his eyes that looked so genuinely concerned.

Those same eyes had stared down at me, night after night, as he abused my body mercilessly...

"Do you want to keep the baby?" I asked quietly.

Of course, there were a thousand questions in my head. But this seemed to be the most important.

"Does it matter what I think? It's in your womb," he replied turning away.

"You're the father," I said simply. He stayed quiet. "You should have an equal say in this."

I gazed out of the car, watching people enter the hospital. Mothers and children, partners and friends... The world went on, and my life had stopped because there was a new one growing in mine.

"If I tell you, would you listen? What's my say got to do in this, anyway? You're free to do whatever you wish..." he replied, turning away, leaning back with his elbow out of the window.

"You make me tell you everything!" I grabbed his jacket forcibly, pulling him towards me. His face remained stoic, as I stared him down. "Those weren't contraceptive pills," I whispered. "I never had a decision to begin with."

He smiled slowly, almost as if proud. "You're right, you never did," he admitted. I felt my throat dry up.

"So drop the niceties then. It's your baby, in my womb. It is your decision. Should I throw it or put it for adoption?" I asked him through gritted teeth.

He remained unfazed, calmly moving my hands away from his shirt.

"You got a pronoun wrong, pet..." he tutted. "It's my baby.. And that's my womb; your body was always mine," he whispered, cupping the side of my face as he leaned close to my ear. "I'm actually glad you asked. It

is

my decision." I pushed him back into the seat, where he fell back laughing.

"You're so fun to play with, little rabbit." He suddenly kissed me.

It was one of his kind kisses- just lips touching lips, his tongue lightly licking, nudging into my mouth. One hand held my face firmly, moving it at his convenience, while the other slid up and down my side, stopping at the curve of my breast, to fan fingers across my mound. He controlled it all, but it wasn't invasive in itself. It was a kiss, I learned, that signaled that he wanted to do something more.

Maybe he wants something more...

"What do you want?" I pulled away, but he held on.

"I want the baby," His hands slid down over my belly.

"I'm not living in a hole with you, you know," I snapped immediately. "I have other things to care about. What about my parents? What about my studies?" I said, my voice getting higher with each word.

"Why are you getting worried? Do you think I won't take care of all that?" He didn't look bothered about those things at all.

I couldn't believe this. The way he just brushed everything off, like a minor inconvenience!

I felt my stomach twist. "I can't do this- even if I wanted to! I can't be a mother- I can't tell my parents-" I clutched my stomach, bending down to grasp my knees.

"Don't worry," I heard him say, as he ran a hand over my back. "I'll take care of everything. I'll take care of you. Just do as I tell you."

A sob escaped from my throat. I was so afraid...

"You have nothing to be afraid of. You're with me. Don't you trust me? Don't I know what's good for you?" he insisted, still rubbing my back.

Huh.

"Is that a trick question?" I asked, still not looking up.

I can go and abort this baby myself, I thought. He doesn't have to know about it.

I heard him chuckle, as he slowly pulled me up, grasping my chin with his finger and thumb, to face him. He smiled at me, dangerously.

And I won't know about it?

said his voice in my head.

Naïve, aren't you...

-------

How could I ruin everything so quickly... I thought morosely. In a span of a few months, my life crumbled away.

Your

old

life,

he corrected.

"You have ruined everything," sobbed my mom, as my father sat beside her, staring into space. "You don't know what you're doing. This will not end the way you're thinking, you stupid girl- and you stand beside the bastard who did this to you, so calmly..." she seethed.

"Please understand, this is her decision. Kim was intelligent enough to consider all her possibilities, and she thought this is the best," said Liam consolingly. He placed a hand on my shoulder, and held my hand with his other, and looked at me.

Oh, what an actor. He cleared his throat, looking at my father. "I'll support her through all this- I love her, I won't let anything bad happen to her-"

"Anything bad?

Anything bad?

" My mother suddenly threw the cushion she was twisting in her hands; it bounced off Liam's leg.

"The worst has already happened, she got brainwashed by you!" screamed my mother, pointing at him.

Liam didn't react. I stepped forward, trying to calm her down. "Mom, please, it will be okay. Please don't over-react..." I stood on my knees, grasping her hands in her lap.

"I only wanted what was good for you," she said quietly. "But now you've decided to be his whore..." She flung my hands away. "Don't you dare call me mother."

I sat back on my heels, my head down. What do I say? Was she wrong?

I felt Liam's hand on my shoulder, pulling me up gently. He looked at my parents.

"I don't know if the decision we made was right or wrong," he asserted, "but as her parents, the least you should do is support her."

"Don't you dare tell us what to do!" snapped my mother, as my father buried his head in his hands.

We all became quiet.

"Kim," said my father finally. "It looks like you got everything figured out, better than all of us. Your decision, is it?" he asked, looking at me. He looked weary.

I nodded.

"Then get out."

------

Liam didn't take me to his house, as I assumed. He took me to his own place; an apartment at the edge of the city, close by my college.

"Welcome to my den," he announced, throwing open the door in front of me.

It was a small studio, not as lavish as Rachel's, just the essentials- a bed space, a workstation, a kitchenette, and a door leading to what I guessed was the bathroom.

He turned on the light as I stepped in. His room was a disaster; papers and folders strewn everywhere, bed unmade, dishes in the sink sitting for God knows how long- and the unmistakable stench of cigarette smoke.

"Urgh, I can't breathe-" I said, holding a hand to my nose. I ran to the curtains, pulling them apart to throw open the balcony doors.

"I'm glad you like it," he said snidely. I relaxed as the breeze cleaned away the tang of smoke.

I fell back into his bed. It smelled like him. That I could stand. I breathed in deeply.

He fell into the bed beside me, pulling me up close to him.

"Do you want to go to college tomorrow?" he asked.

"I don't think I can face anything anymore," I whispered, burying my face into his neck.

"Relax here then. Take your time. Things have just changed, and it'll take some time for you to adjust- that's normal."

I let out a soft cry- I don't know why. I was just so tired...

"My poor little rabbit..." He lifted my chin and kissed my forehead. He looked at me sadly, almost apologetic.

"Why do you call me 'rabbit'?" I asked, suddenly.

"Because of your teeth, that's why." He tapped a finger against my front tooth. "And, you're like a little bunny. You look so gentle, but you still have a vicious bite." He laughed, looking at the expression on my face.

I nudged my head against his chest, and he pulled me in lovingly, caressing my head.

"Then what about that rabbit story?" I asked, my head still buried in his embrace.

I felt him tense up, just for a second."What rabbit story?" he asked, voice cool as ever.

"Vivi told me that you told her that you killed rabbits for fun when you were a kid."

"She did, did she?" There was a hint of amusement in his voice.

"You don't like animals. Yet your pet name for me is one."

He stared back at me, as if waiting to hear the rest of my theory. I felt silly.

"Funny, isn't it?" he asked, looking down at me. I blinked, giving up, and he smiled again.

"Well, babydoll, do you want to know what really happened?"

I swallowed, but kept my gaze fixed. "Yes."

"Well, yeah. I killed those dirty little things. Lured them in, and chopped their heads off while they ate. I was bored."

I froze up, stuck to his body. I couldn't move my arms away from him, but felt his embrace close tighter around me.

"There was a white one. Those are rare in the wild, you know? It was a nice, fat female." He suddenly swooped down, and kissed my nose. "Like you. So sweet, but it was such an hostile little thing."

I felt my heart beat faster.

"I felt something for it. I thought about keeping it, honest. It almost made me re-think about what I was doing. It was such a messy job, you know. But I guess taking care of her kept me busy, in a better way..."

I felt him move his hands up and down my back. I was suddenly aware of his heartbeat, and the heat of his body.

"But then it was a rebellious little bitch! Clawing and biting whenever I got too close. Then it wouldn't stay in the lovely cage I made for it. It kept trying to escape. So I let it go."

"You... let it go?" I asked.

"Yeah. Let it go to bunny heaven - or hell," he started laughing.

I felt tears swell up in my eyes.

What have I gotten myself into?

I wanted to run.

But I have no other place to go, I thought.

I just escaped, to land in the jaws of my predator.

I felt his hands run up and down to the small of my back, pushing my hips into his. I felt the warmth of his erection, and I was afraid...

"And when I cut her open, you know what I found? Little baby rabbits. That's why it was so aggressive! It wanted to save its babies. Cute, isn't it?"

Gunmetal eyes shone down coldly at me. I started to shake with the force of my sobs.

"You scare me," I whispered.

"About time that happened. Congrats for holding out so long." For once, that didn't sound like sarcasm.

I cried into his chest. It took me a long time to stop. Neither of us made a move or said a word until I looked up again.

His eyes met mine, and he bit his lip, hissing slightly as he exhaled.

"God is making fun of me, isn't he," he whispered, touching my lips gently. "I can't stand it when you cry... But that's all I want you to do..."

One hand went up to run over his hair, as if wondering what to do- no-

whether

to do...

He turned slightly, to slide one hand under my shirt, reaching up to my bra-strap. I felt him finger the hooks, playing with the elastic.

"Do it," I whispered. I wiped the tears away and swallowed, clearing my throat.

"Hmmm?"

"Fuck me, right now. Anyway you want. As many times as you want."

He started laughing. He pulled his hand out of my shirt and instead reached across for a pack of cigarettes that were sitting on the side table.

"That is a dangerous request," he said simply, as he lit the cigarette. He took a puff, watching me intently.

"Dangerous?" I repeated, and smiled mirthlessly. "Danger... only exists when you have something to lose, when you're afraid something will be harmed... I have nothing... I don't care if I die right now."

I felt weak, watery. Yet I pulled myself up. Sitting cross legged, I crocked my head, loosening my plait with one hand. He lay on the pillows, observing my fingers as they moved down to my shirt, nudging the buttons out slowly, one by one.

What else is left, I thought. I'm done. Use me, all you want.

This wasn't the wild, passionate feeling I initially had for him. This was me, giving up. He had taken over my mind, my thoughts, my life- and now my body as well. I lost.

I was so lost in thought, that I didn't notice his hand that reached out, scooping up my breast. I leaned forward on an arm, giving myself in to the feeling...

"Don't stop, babydoll..." he murmured, his eyes lingering on my flesh.

My breasts were now a bit too big for my bra- I hadn't bought any new ones lately, I pondered aimlessly, as I ran a finger over a nipple that was peeking out of the cup. Goosebumps erupted as I did so, and I arched my back slightly from the shiver that ran down my spine. He smirked, falling back into the pillows.

"Now that you mention it, I've always wanted to literally fuck a person to death," he commented lazily, blowing out smoke.

"Well then, here's your chance," I replied, stretching my legs. I set one foot over his knees, and pushed my skirt up my thigh. My hand rested over the fabric of my panties, and I lightly ran my fingers over the stretched fabric. The light touches sent sparks of pleasure through my core, and I shivered. I could smell my arousal. Could he?

A silver of sunlight fell on his face as he sat up. Although his movements were slow, I could see the tension in his body.

"Come, kill me," I dared.

He took a deep breath, and groaned, exhaling his lungful of smoke as he did. "Come here," he said, motioning me close with a finger. I watched him, my eyes still narrowed, not moving.

He came closer instead. "Let me teach you how to smoke."

I rolled my eyes, yet he insisted. "You asked me to kill you. This is a good way as any."

He wrapped an arm around me, and with another hand he bought the cigarette close to my lips.

"Pull it in," he instructed. "But don't take it into your lungs. Keep it in your mouth until it cools." He moved the cigarette away.

I did as he said. It was like sipping warm air. Nasty, bitter air. I felt him edge his fingers over the edge of my open shirt, his fingertips barely touching my skin.

"Now take it into your lungs...and then breathe out."

I tried to, but the moment I did I started coughing, and my eyes watered as I tried to fight the smoke and breathe at the same time. He laughed, watching me flail miserably. Angrily, I grabbed his forearm, and added a new set of nail scratches to his skin. He winced slightly, and smiled.

"Such a sweet little thing," he cooed, now his arm around my waist, trailing over my skin.

"This is what I love about you. Such a self righteous little thing, even when you're made from the same thing as me."

His other hand sank down under the elastic of my skirt, and I moaned, grabbing his hand as he teased the wet fabric of my panties.

"Do you like this? Do you want me to tease your little pussy until it aches to be pounded by my cock?" he whispered in my ear.

"Yes, yes, please," I whimpered. I pressed my thighs together, trapping his hand between my legs.

"I knew you were a little slut, no matter how you fool yourself... That's how you got my seed growing in you.. Because you're a cum-hungry slut who's only good for breeding. Isn't it? Say it..." He growled, passing his lips against my neck.

"I'm... I'm a cum hungry slut who's only good for breeding," I whispered, and I believed it. I accepted it- and I loved it.

Finally, I was actually free. I didn't need to be anything. Something had given away, and I wasn't bound by any rule in the world anymore to be anything except what he told me to be.

"That's my good little girl," he whispered. He reached into my panties, and pulled them aside, finger fucking me as hard as he could. I gasped, edging a little away at the forcefulness, at the strain of the cloth cutting into my skin, but he steadied his hold on my with his other hand.

"Fuck these clothes," he said, suddenly pushing me away. "Strip now, whore, I want to rape you like you deserve to be."

I got on my knees, and started removing my clothes. I watched him take off his shirt and jeans in a few fluid motions, while my fingers fumbled with the remaining buttons.

"Fucking slut, don't you know how to strip?" He grabbed my waist, spinning me around and pinned my head down to the mattress. I felt his hands span across my ass, then forcibly pulled down my panties. My pussy and ass were held up high, presented to him, and he ran a finger up and down over them teasingly

"How's my baby going to come out of that tight little pussy?" he asked, rubbing my clit.

I moaned into the mattress, as I felt myself getting wetter, my walls starting to contract...

"Tell me, whore!" he said, suddenly pulling up my head by my hair. I yelped, automatically raising my hands up to pry his hands away. He just shook me violently. "How, little rabbit?" he asked, his tone dripping with poison.

"I-I- don't- any way you want, Master..." I cried.

"Well pet, I have two options. I can cut you open, like that little rabbit I loved so much." He inserted his fingers into my pussy and started pumping, and now it was fast, and it hit right where it needed to.

"Or, I'll rape your pussy and open it up so it's nice and easy... Well?"

I panted, moving my hips along with his hands, my breasts now bouncing out of my bra. He grabbed a tit and squeezed, digging his fingers into my already painful, engorged breasts.

"Whatever you wish, Master," I mumbled, and he chuckled.

"Smart answer," he replied. I felt his fingers leaving, to be replaced immediately by his thick cock. He filled me to the hilt, and the pain and combination of pain and pleasure was overwhelming- I hardly had time to breathe as he pulled out, and pushed deep into my core again, and again, and again. His hands were now over my neck and breasts, grabbing and squeezing as he felt like it. For a second he almost closed my airway- everything became dark, and suddenly I was bought back to life, seeing sparks fly in front of my eyes and the sensation of his hard cock filling me made me spasm uncontrollably.

"You fucking little bitch," I heard him say, as my walls tightened around him. "Fucking, fucking little cum bucket... Don't you dare cum unless I let you. Your pleasure comes after mine, understand?"

"Y-y-yes." My voice was weak and broken.

"What an obedient little pet I have," he whispered. His pace suddenly became painfully slow- he had built me up, only to leave me aching. I curled my fingers into my fist and mewled.