Chapter 2 - Adaptation
Now, Kriti knew that the Thakur had been watching Sunil and her together since their wedding night and, as far as she understood, Sunil had given no protest. Whether the Thakur was present behind the mirror every time or not, on some level, her humiliation was already complete.
When Sunil came to their bedroom the next night, she did not go to him. Still, he called her to him, standing at the foot of their bed. She felt all too conscious of the ornate mirror looming over them. Upon touring their future chambers for the first time, she had raised a brow. Sunil had teased that once married, they could have that indulgence in the sanctity of their space.
Sanctity indeed
.
From the day Sunil abused Choti, Kriti had struggled to resume enjoyment in their coupling. She had just begun to recover a semblance of it when he handled her so roughly in the aftermath of his father's greed for sole credit in the business expansion. Still, she had tried to find a way to
authentically
participate. With this third blow, it was all she could do to remain compliant and lie beneath Sunil, fighting the overwhelming urge to flee, taking her mind elsewhere and away from the likelihood that her father-in-law was watching them and ... pleasing himself.
Sunil took his time, moving her into different positions. Somehow, she bore it. She could not have known how physically and emotionally frustrated he was from earlier in the day, from being stirred and then crushed once again, how badly he wanted to prove that it did not matter. Had she understood, perhaps she would not have cared any longer. Sunil may have been her husband and lord, but she had to worry about herself.
After he was fully satisfied, Sunil rolled off her, trying to catch his breath. "You seem tired," he said.
"It is only the many... changes," she replied. "I'm accustomed to working, to using my mind more. Don't worry, I'll adapt."
"Good," Sunil grunted, wrapping himself in the blankets, "understand that your
Lord
prefers an active bedmate."
Rage rose in her so quickly that she could scarcely prevent herself from kicking him. How effectively he had produced the illusion of attentive suitor, then boyfriend, then, lover. Dropping all pretense, he was now himself. Seated on the edge of the bed, she waited. He was already asleep, breathing steadily. She had no way of knowing whether the Thakur had left his
hunting blind
as she had come to think of it in the short thirty-six hours of knowledge.
Kriti slipped into the bathroom and warmed the shower. Quickly, she sluiced the sweat and fluids from herself, squeezing her internal muscles and watching Sunil's seed slide down her legs to the drain. Not for the first time of late, she skimmed her fingers over the nearly imperceptible, tiny bump of her implant. Until a few weeks ago, she hadn't given it a thought in just over two years.
In her senior year of college, an acquaintance had been assaulted near campus by a group of men and beyond the trauma, in the worst of outcomes, became pregnant. Realizing in shock that abstinence was not the blanket protection they had thought, Kriti's tight circle of friends had vowed this would not happen to any of them and went together to a clinic. Now, this tiny capsule seemed of vital importance. There would be no way she'd bring a child into the current situation, let alone—if things continued down the current path—risk not knowing whose child it would be. She had a little time before children would be expected.
Drying off, she chose a set of light and soft raw-silk pajamas from a lower drawer. She couldn't reach her yoga practice clothing in her closet without making noise.
Stealthily, she slipped through the house to the small mat room next to the home gym. Here, the brothers practiced kalarippayattu and sparred with one another. It was perfect for her practice as well. For fifteen minutes, she worked slowly through asanas meant specifically to calm, to let her anger flow through her and out. At the end, she sat for a brief meditation.
Out in the hallway again, she had started back to bed when a shadow appeared further down near the main kitchen. With a start, she recognized Raj's silhouette. He beckoned to her. She couldn't help but worry that more surprises of the nasty sort were in store, but she went all the same.
He had turned on a light at the end of the kitchen where a seating area accommodated snacks and hasty meals. A glass of salted lassi sat in the small pool of light. "Can I get you something?" Raj said softly, startling her.
Kriti realized that she was ravenous. Her practice had apparently settled energies that had been interfering with her desire to eat. She nodded. "The same, please." She watched Raj move as he shook the capped jar and poured, then ground a little salt and cardamom in the mortar and sprinkled it with his fingers. Although he looked younger than he was, he had left any awkward phase behind and had settled into grace.
Raj brought her glass and they both sat. At first, they were quiet, sipping together. It was, fortunately, an easy silence. "I feel like I should apologize to you, Kriti," he said at last, looking at his hands. "You've been nothing but sweet to me. I don't like how you're treated. My god, the formal lecture about your
place
in the household. I mean, it was expected given how traditional the Thakur is." He frowned. "But the way father treated you at that breakfast, I was shocked! He and Sunil have always had an unhealthy competition. Sunil was so excited about your engagement, I actually thought things would be different. Maybe he did too." He looked up at her, his big eyes soft. There was a momentary hesitation before he continued. "I like you. I can't outright defy Father, or Sunil for that matter, but I'll help you as I can."
Kriti took a moment to consider his sincerity. This could, of course, be a trap, but she did not think so. His eyes might be shining with something sensual, but she'd never caught him ogling her. "Did you know that he has been watching Sunil and me in our room? From behind the mirror." From his horrified expression, she knew that he didn't. "I only just learned of it. The shame is so .. so overwhelming." There was little either could say to that revelation. Finally, she ventured on. "Raj, was your mother... shared?" She felt a surge of apprehension at the possible answers.
Raj shook his head. "Absolutely not. Everything in this house revolves around
Father
. He would never share what is his." He fiddled with his glass and took a few long moments before he went on. "He did put her on display, used her to provoke jealousy and desire among his colleagues—Father doesn't have
friends
, of course, everyone is beneath him. Mother handled all that with her usual grace and I think, secretly, a sense of irony."
Kriti nodded. "There's so much I don't know about managing these... appetites. Sunil is becoming unhappy with me. I'm struggling to, as you said,