I've been a bad, bad girl. Ever heard that song?
Criminal
by Fiona Apple. It strikes a chord with me. No pun intended.
My hubby moved me from North Carolina to Mississippi immediately after we married, and it was a bit of a shell shock to say the least. I got involved with a doctor in my clinic only months beyond our honeymoon in Ashville. No excuses. Hubby was thankfully oblivious.
The guy had to leave the practice because his wife found out he was a Casanova. His real name was Brad. I wasn't specifically called out, but people knew what was up. After his departure, I discovered that I wasn't his only honeysuckle. He had screwed about a third of the nursing staff.
Brad had three kids at home and several pictures of the family on his desk. I jerked him off a few times in his office only inches away from the brightly framed photos, polishing his knob like mahogany wood until he shot his hot seed across his wife's pretty face. I smeared his spunk across the glass with a tissue.
Brad's ropes of white cum contrasted sharply with the elegant dark sheen of his furniture. It was a pleasure to milk him in the middle of a busy day.
I skipped through the tulips during that dangerous relationship; no collateral damage to speak of, but I ended up banging my hubby's best friend in the guest room shower a year later. He was so fucking hot! Damn, he was good.
It's so weird how cheating becomes easier the second time. The guy's name was Dan. He visited our house all the time. Sometimes he practically lived with us. The affair started eight months after my first of two babies. It lasted three months before we got caught. Dan was excommunicated from our family, and I was sent to a psychologist for a year. No divorce.
Everyone decided I was seduced and depressed. I guess they thought I got seduced
because
I was depressed, but I felt more depressed after the seduction was over. My husband's brothers love me and were adequately convincing on my behalf, though I doubt they believed their own argument. I've always flirted with them both rather avidly so, they took my case pro bono.
Cheating
means you're fucking someone else behind your husband's back.
Cucking
means you're fucking that someone right in his face. In other words, he knows you're screwing around, and he either likes it or is unwilling to do anything about it. I know opinions vary but for the purpose of this exercise, I want to make the terms clean and simple... because everything else is complicated.
The cheating started because I'm a slut with a wandering eye, and I know how to catch a look. The cucking started because my hubby was invited to an interview in Nashville for an administrative job that paid bank. The offer came out of nowhere. He wasn't even looking. We went up there for a weekend. They wanted him bad based on our room at the Renaissance and the five-star cuisine with free drinks. I could learn to love that shit.
The problem was that we all got drunk the last night at dinner, and the firm had an executive named Gordon who was sex on a stick. He served as our primary liaison during our visit. We were left in his company by the end of the evening, and he invited me to the men's restroom at the Hermitage Hotel where we were dining. Now, I know that sounds incredibly forward of him, but that hotel's restroom is a tourist attraction and has been featured in several movie scenes. You can look it up online.
We went in there, me and Gordon. My husband followed closely behind with his fourth cocktail in hand because he can never say
no
to free alcohol. There's a shoeshine pyramid in the middle of that bathroom with a lovely chair that serves almost as a centerpiece. Andy climbed up and plopped himself in it. As the hour was late, nobody was getting shoeshines. I took pics with my cell of the eclectic decor. It's really an unusual facility.
I then asked to go to the ladies' room for obvious reasons and was told by Gordon that it was perfectly okay for me to use one of the handsomely appointed stalls where we were. When Gordon followed me in there, I expected my husband to do something. He didn't. Gordon locked the door behind us and coaxed me out of my blouse and skirt. He pocketed my underwear, both bra and thong panties, then made me straddle the toilet with my hands on the wall where I assumed he would insist that I pee into the bowl standing up. Instead, he finger-fucked the shit out of me till I squirted all over the seat, then made me squat and piss in the floor. I was plenty loud about it, but my husband was still perched on his throne when we exited. There were plenty of visitors while we kept ourselves busy, and I'm sure they all got an earful.
The mess was massively embarrassing, and I was completely down to get the hell out of there as Gordon dragged me through the hotel lobby on our way to call for his car. The Renaissance was only a few blocks away. Andy and I had walked to the dinner meeting earlier, but my hubby was in no condition to ambulate back. Gordon took us both to our hotel, then accompanied us inside where he attempted to book a Penthouse unsuccessfully. We then headed to
The Bridge
which is a bar several floors upstairs that provides amazing views of the city.
I secured a table for the three of us in advance by going up there by myself while Andy and Gordon were still at the front desk. I was immediately hit on by two well-dressed cowboys who fired a drink over and sat down beside me. They claimed to be music industry execs and seemed completely uninhibited when I told them I was waiting on my husband. Their persistence probably had something to do with my lack of a bra and the sheer sleeveless blouse I was wearing. They could probably also look up my skirt.
Turns out, these guys had a method for picking up girls in bars. The short of it was they would corral some woman that they liked, then ask her to call a friend for a foursome. Apparently, this is a surprisingly successful technique in Nashville. If the method didn't work, they were good with an MFM threesome. I'd be good with that too. My girlfriends were all out of town.
The guys were seriously cute; I'll give them that. They seemed curious when my hubby staggered in beside Gordon who was more than a little perturbed about how I'd been cornered. I touted the jealousy for all it was worth. By that time, I was feeling like Gordon's property, and my hubby was along for the ride. All I needed to convince me was another strong drink...
Gordon gruffly insisted that I lewdly unbutton my blouse and put myself on public display at our table. I hesitantly agreed after hubby deferred any objections. I guess I did it just to see Andy's reaction, of which there was none. Gordon did it as punishment for my friendly visitors. Things got worse in the elevator on the way to our room where Gordon took off my blouse completely. He made me press my nude breasts against the window. "Show Nashville your tits," he told me. I playfully surrendered, but then he wouldn't return my shirt.
Gordon escorted me and my husband down the hall to our room. I was topless with my arms across my chest. "Put your arms down, Megan," he told me. "Nobody's going to arrest you. I've got plenty of connections in this town. I know people."
"This is embarrassing," I told him. I still complied with his request until we passed two young girls that I was pretty sure were lesbians on their way out for fun. They were wearing short shorts and cowboy boots. Gordon whistled them down to come feel me up, but they giggled and quickly took off.