Jennifer sat on the couch, legs pulled up. She held on to a bunch of crumpled paper tissues and every now and then wiped tears away. "I can't believe I ruined everything," she sobbed, sniffling. "For what? Some stupid fuck?" Her eyes met her best friend's worried ones. "You think he will forgive me?"
Sally, her best friend, wanted to be reassuring, to say that everything would be fine. But she'd been betrayed once before and knew how badly it hurt to experience that. And had been lucky enough not to have caught her ex in the act itself. "I don't know, Jen. I mean, I really want you guys to make up. You know that. But what you've done...it's bad."
"I know," said Jen and sniffled again.
"Why'd you do it then? You must have known how likely it was to get caught!"
"I don't know. Mike...he just had this effect on me. I don't even know how to describe it. Have you ever felt something like that before? You look at a person and you're overcome by this raw, sexual desire. You just want to grab that person and fuck his brains out. And it's not that I was unsatisfied or sexually frustrated. Things between me and Tom - I thought they were good. Great. He always makes sure that all my needs are taken care of. He's gentle and caring and really eager to please me. Mike...he used me for sex and I knew it. He would have fucked me on the dinner table in front of his parents. And for some sick reason I would have let him. I've never felt so wanted before."
Sally handed her another paper tissue as fresh tears streaked down her face. "Jen, if Tom can forgive you - if things work out and you get back together - can you promise that you'll never meet with Mike again? Cause it's likely you two will run into each other. He's the son of Tom's boss. What if he wants you again during your next run-in?"
"I won't give in again," Jennifer swore. "I'd do anything to make Tom forgive me."
"Anything?"
Both Jennifer and Sally looked towards the door, where Tom was standing.
Tom let the apartment door fall shut. "Anything, really? What do you have in mind? Beg? Cry? Promise never to screw up again?" He shook his head. "I have to see Mike again. We will run into each other regularly. He helps out in his father's firm. He can get me fired! Do you have any idea how that makes me feel? This job is my dream job, Jen. And even if I hated it, we need the money. I can't just quit! That means I'm constantly reminded of what you've done. Every time I look at him, or even you, I see you wrapped around him, sweaty and wild, begging for more! What could you possibly do to make me forget that, huh? I don't think some lame apologies will do!" He walked into their bedroom and slammed the door shut.
Jennifer buried her face into her hands.
"It's a good thing he hasn't broken up with you yet," Sally said, trying to give her friend some hope. "I think he's willing to work through this. Just give it all some time." She checked the time. "Shit, I'm late for work. Call me if you need anything, okay? And don't push him. Give him some room. Bye, Jen!"
+++++
Two weeks later, Jen was still sleeping on the couch, barely talking to Tom. They hardly spoke three words during a day. When he was back from work one afternoon, she had enough. She couldn't live like this anymore, in constant limbo, not knowing if their relationship stood a chance. She cornered him in the kitchen when he poured himself a drink.
"We need to talk."
"About what," he asked, his voice tart.
"Be angry with me all you want. But please, yell at me. Call me a slut, kick me out, or for God's sake, scream at me until your lungs hurt, but don't ignore me. I know I messed up. If there was a way to make up for it, I would do it. But don't expect me to be the one to end our relationship. I want to fight for us. I still love you, Tom. Love was never the issue. Mike and I--"
"I don't want to hear about Mike and you," he snapped and swallowed all of his drink in one long gulp. "I don't care about you and Mike! I don't want to think about you and Mike. But you know what? I can't escape you and Mike! I have to work with him. Our firm is co-working on a project. And since my boss doesn't that his son fucked my girlfriend during his party, I can't expect him to let me focus on other projects."
"Mike...does he remind you of what happened?" she dared to ask.
Tom looked away. "Does Mike brag about having fucked you? No, Jen. He acts professionally. Like I do. But that doesn't make it any better or less awkward! It is a huge elephant in the room."
She leaned back against the fridge, looking guilty and ashamed. "I'm so sorry, Tom. Believe me, I will do anything to make up for it. But please, give me a chance to do so. If you want to sleep with another woman to even--"
He interrupted her with laughter. "You think that will make it better? Who am I supposed to have sex with. Your boss? He's fifty years old and so fat that he needs a crutch to stand up. Or your co-worker, that seventeen-year old intern that's barely out of her diapers? She still has braces! Besides," he said helplessly. "That's not how it works. I'm tired. I'm having a headache. I want to rest. But have fun figuring out how to make up for what happened!"
+++++
Another week later the situation still hadn't improved. Jen was stretching out her left leg as she sat on her yoga mat in the living room. Sally sat next to her, mirroring her friend's moves.
"Still no change?"
"He barely tolerates me," Jennifer lamented.
"Maybe," her friend suggested carefully, "you have to make a cut. I can't go on like this. It's not good for anyone."
Jennifer turned around, lifted her butt in the air and lowered her head far down, stretching her neck almost painfully long. Sally, doing the same, groaned. "Yoga sucks. Why are we doing this again?"
"'Cause it makes your butt look hot," Tom quipped as he came out of the kitchen. "Hey, Sally. How are you doing?"
Despite Jen's and Tom's troubles, Sally got along well with Tom. While she wouldn't consider them friends, he was nice and fair. And a good host. "I'm alive," she joked. "We'll see if I still am when this exercise is over. Care to join us? Jen's got a big yoga mat and some room to spare."
"No, thanks!"
"Too bad."
Mike watched them for a moment longer on his way returning into the bedroom which had become his main habitat in recent weeks. As he observed his girlfriend and her best friend bent and stretch, wearing nothing but spandex pants and tight, cropped sports bras that didn't leave a lot to the imagination, he felt his groin stiffen at the sight. It had been three weeks since he'd gotten laid and was beginning to feel the lack of relief.
